Chapter 74: It's 'Common Sense' for the Imperial Princess to Become an Onahole (1)[R-18]
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 74: It's 'Common Sense' for the Imperial Princess to Become an Onahole (1)[R-18]
“Hehe! An A is definitely in the bag!”
Evelyn let out a cute giggle after hearing the professor’s evaluation of our presentation.
It was only natural, really.
Half of a presentation comes down to the speaker’s confidence and voice. Even setting aside the fact that she was my childhood friend, Evelyn objectively had a talent for drawing people’s attention.
Combine that with the presentation materials prepared by Estelle, the second-highest-ranking student in our year, and the professor’s high praise was an inevitable outcome.
Me?
Well, I’d been working hard managing the Gallery for the sake of world peace, so I figured I deserved some leniency.
“Hm! Why don’t we go out for an after-party once we’re done today?”
“......Sorry. I... I don’t think I can make it. I’m sorry.”
“Really? Then I guess it can’t be helped. Ian, looks like it’s just the two of us.”
When Estelle cautiously declined, Evelyn didn’t push her, likely not wanting to make her feel burdened.
“Sorry, Evelyn, but I can’t make it today either.”
“...What? Why not you too?”
“I have a prior engagement with the Head of the Disciplinary Committee.”
Today marked the third day since I last saw Laplace.
In other words, it was time for another belly punch.
“...Ugh. Why does Lady Laplace keep calling for you?”
“Because I’m the ‘Special Inspector’?”
“Geez... I knew this would happen. What was it? A position with all the rights and none of the responsibilities? Yeah, right, what a load of bullshit. As if you’d ever actually land a sweet deal like that.”
“Well, what can I do? It’s not like I can quit now.”
I shrugged in response to Evelyn’s grumbling.
‘Actually, I really am enjoying all the rights without any of the responsibilities...’
I had designated the Old School Building as my personal patrol zone to ensure no one else would come near it, and I was steadily building up my performance record by reporting incidents Laplace had actually solved as my own work.
If I kept this up, I wouldn’t have to worry about employment based on my record as a ‘Special Inspector’ alone.
“You little shit... This is why I told you not to do it. Why do you always lose out because you won’t listen to me?”
“I feel like I’ve lost out plenty of times by listening to you, though...”
“...What?”
“Nothing. Anyway, how about we go next Sunday instead?”
“Hmph! You reject the after-party and now you’re asking me out on a date?”
“Yeah, it’s a date. ...I have something important to tell you, too.”
“...Huh? W-What? S-Something important?”
Evelyn’s eyes widened at my words.
“W-W-What is it?... Why... why are you being so... so sudden and proactive all of a sudden...”
“...Do you not want to go on a date?”
“W-Who said I didn’t? T-Then, when? After you get back from Church?”
“No, I’m not going to Church next week.”
I had made up my mind after thinking it over seriously for the past few days.
I would reveal my ‘Harem Plan’ to Evelyn before ‘Ellis’s Day’ arrived.
Evelyn would feel betrayed.
She might even cry.
No, she almost certainly would...
But it was a step I had to take eventually.
It was impossible for me to abandon Lady Yuris... or Laplace.
Of course, persuading Evelyn wouldn’t be easy.
It made me feel like trash, but if the roles were reversed, I knew I would never be able to accept it.
‘...Even so.’
I had to do it.
Even if I had to get on my knees, bow my head, lick her feet, and beg over and over again.
I would get Evelyn’s permission, no matter what.
Because I couldn’t even imagine a life without Evelyn in it.
“He... Hehe... Sip... S-Something’s... suspicious? ...Ian isn’t usually this kind of guy.”
“...Ian. Evelyn.”
“Yeah, Estelle?”
“...I’m not feeling very well, so I’m going to head to the infirmary for a bit.”
“Oh? Are you okay? Can you make it on your own? Want me to go with you?”
“...No, it’s not that bad. I’ll go by myself...”
When I spoke to her, Estelle shook her head and declined again.
“...And thank you both, once again, for letting me join your group.”
“I told you. We’re friends, you don’t need ‘permission.’ We just do things together. Right, Evelyn?”
“....”
“...Evelyn?”
“Huh? Oh. Yeah... I guess. We probably would’ve struggled if it weren’t for you, Estelle. You saw how this idiot Ian didn’t even start the presentation materials until the very last minute.”
“...Thank you for saying that. I’ll be going now, then.”
Estelle gave a small smile and wheeled herself out.
“....”
“Evelyn?”
When I called her name, Evelyn narrowed her eyes and glared at me before letting out a long sigh.
“Sigh... You dense moron.”
“Why the sudden insult... Hey, Evelyn, where are you going?”
“None of your business! Don’t follow me, you piece of shit!”
“Wait. Even if you’re leaving, what about lunch...”
“I don’t care! There’s nothing for you today, so figure it out yourself!!”
Slam—!!
I had no idea what had ticked her off so much, but she stormed off, taking even my lunch box with her.
“...Hmm.”
I was screwed.
I hadn’t brought a lunch of my own, naturally assuming I’d be eating the one Evelyn made, and I didn’t have a single cent on me.
“....”
After pondering how to resolve this situation for a moment, I found a solution.
‘In that case, I’m heading to the Disciplinary Committee room!’
Gaur and Kuoli would surely share some food with a hungry guy like me.
...They might talk weird, but they were actually kind-hearted kids once you got to know them.
Anya, on the other hand, spoke relatively normally but had a nasty personality.
Step— Step—
“Kyaaaa!”
“....!”
As I was walking toward the Disciplinary Committee room, I heard a scream from outside the window.
Startled, I checked outside, but fortunately, it wasn’t an incident; it was just a game of women’s basketball.
“...Whew.”
Most of the faces were unfamiliar—likely from a different year—but Elfriede, with her lime-green twin tails fluttering, stood out clearly.
Thump— Thump— Swish—!
With a serious expression, Elfriede stared down the hoop. In an instant, she bypassed the opposing defender and drove forward...
—The left hand only supports.
For some reason, I felt like I could hear Elfriede’s voice, even though she was too far away for it to be audible.
Whish—! Clatter—! Beep—! Beep—!
“Kyaaaa!!! We won! We won!!!”
At that moment, joyful screams erupted again as her teammates rushed toward Elfriede.
It looked like Elfriede had sunk a jump shot right before the buzzer to pull off a comeback victory.
“She really is something...”
Perhaps as a trade-off for her innate spirit affinity, there were no ‘Blessed Ones’ among the Elf Tribe.
However, looking at Elfriede’s movements as she bypassed those defenders just now, one could easily believe she was a Blessed One of the body enhancement type.
Snap—!
Suddenly, Elfriede turned her head toward me and mouthed something.
—Senior... you. saw. me. right?
Shiver—!
A chill ran down my spine, as if I had come face-to-face with a giant eyeball in the depths of the ocean.
‘No way!’
She accurately sensed my gaze from this distance and found my location in an instant?
—I’m... coming. now?
‘I have to run...!’
No matter how much of a genius beauty spirit mage Elfriede was, it would take her some time to get up here!
I tried to pretend I hadn’t seen her and make a run for it, but...
Tap— Tap— Tap— Tap—
“...Gasp!”
To my shock, Elfriede was literally stepping on thin air as she approached me.
“It’s been a while! Ian Sunbae☆”
“...Y-Yeah, it has, Elfriede.”
“Tehe~☆ If I’d known you were watching, I would’ve tried even harder! So, how was your cute junior’s performance?”
“Uh... it was impressive.”
“Aing~! You’re making me blush with all that praise! By the way, where are you headed, Senior?”
“Oh, uh... to get some lunch.”
At that, Elfriede’s eyes sparkled like a tigress that had spotted its prey.
“Oh my~! What a coincidence!! I was just about to have lunch too! If you’re okay with it, why don’t we...”
“Sorry, I didn’t bring my lunch box or any money today, so I don’t think I can eat with you.”
“That’s fine! I’ll buy! In exchange, next time, you can...”
“No, I can’t do that. A senior who gets treated to a meal by their junior shouldn’t exist in this world. They’re trash that must be eradicated. I don’t want to become that kind of trash.”
“Huh...? Is getting a meal bought for you really that bad...?”
“It’s a matter of conviction. Let’s have a meal together later instead. I’ll buy then.”
“Oh? Really? When?”
“...Um. I’ll contact you as soon as I have some time.”
“Ah! Okay! I’ll be waiting.”
“Yeah, sure. See you later, then.”
Of course, I had no way of contacting Elfriede.
I could probably do it through the Gallery, but since that wasn’t going to happen, it was effectively true that I didn’t know how.
“Huh...? But Senior, how are you going to contact...”
I heard Elfriede muttering behind me as she realized that fact a moment too late, just as I swung open the door to the Disciplinary Committee room.
Slide—!
“Oh~ I wondered who was opening the door so roughly~ and it’s just Ian~”
“Fufu... Well, well, ‘Special Inspector.’ You’ve finally shown your face.”
“....”
As expected, Gaur and Kuoli were eating lunch, and...
“...What is it? Ian.”
Instead of Anya, Laplace was with them.
“Ah, well... I forgot my lunch box. Do you mind if I sit there for a second?”
“...Go ahead.”
Twitch!
Laplace flinched slightly as I sat down next to her.
“Hooo~ So Ian has come to ask the great Gaur~ to share some lunch~?”
“...Yeah, I’ll definitely pay you back next time.”
“Fufufu~ Fine~ I shall share~ but consider it a debt~.”
“Then I shall share a bit as well. An opportunity to stack a ‘debt’ with the Special Inspector... this is quite precious.”
Scoop— Scoop—
Gaur and Kuoli each scooped some food from their own lunch boxes into a lid and handed it to me.
“Thanks. I’ll eat well.”
“....”
Watching the two of them, Laplace seemed to be hesitating over whether she should share her lunch too.
It wasn’t that she didn’t want to give me any, but rather she seemed worried that I might scold her if she acted out of turn.
Slide—
“...Don’t forget it next time.”
In the end, deciding that she’d probably get in more trouble if she didn’t give me any, she opened her lunch box and shared some.
“Thank you.”
Honestly, since it was the Imperial Princess’s lunch, I expected it to be incredibly extravagant... but while the portion was large, it felt surprisingly home-cooked.
‘...Wait, is this handmade?’
Laplace cooking... I couldn’t really imagine it.
“By the way, where’s Anya? I don’t see her.”
“Nom nom... Anya... said she couldn’t come because her menstrual cramps are really bad.”
“Again? She took a break for that not too long ago.”
“Oh? You’re right. Does Anya have a period twice a month? Gasp! Could it be that Anya isn’t actually a normal ‘human’?”
“...Stop talking nonsense and just eat, Kuoli.”
“Well, well, I’ve been scolded... Understood. Nom nom...”
“This is good, Gaur.”
“Fufu~ Everything Gaur makes is delicious~”
Clack—
Once we finished eating while chatting...
“...Special Inspector. A word with me.”
Laplace said to me as she stood up from her seat.