Chapter 132: 1. Lift Elfriede Up (2)[R-18]
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 132: 1. Lift Elfriede Up (2)[R-18]
“Sigh... I seriously don’t get it. Why the hell is a fucking bitch who’s been hiding like a rat all this time showing up in front of me right now? Does this even make sense?”
“You have a foul mouth, child. If you do not mend your speech, you will invite great calamity upon yourself one day.”
“Whatever, you fucking bitch. Did you expect me to use honorifics for a Special-Class Subjugation Target? I’m in a shitty mood right now, so don’t mess with me. Ptooey!”
The woman with waist-length purple hair looked taken aback by Elfriede’s response.
“...Do you speak to me this way even while knowing who I am?”
“Yeah, I know. You’re Laura Lavandula. Why? Am I not allowed to curse at a former Saintess, you fucking bitch?”
“...I cannot tell if you are fearless or simply thoughtless. They say children these days are frightening, but...”
Suddenly, Laura stopped mid-sentence, her eyes fixed on something about Elfriede.
“What? Why’d you stop talking, you fucking bitch?”
“...I see. You are an Old Hag in the guise of a child.”
She wasn’t saying this simply because Elfriede was over two hundred years old.
Being merely that age wouldn’t earn someone the title of ‘Old Hag’ from Laura.
Grip—
Laura, who had obtained the power of Necromancy at the cost of her blessing of Foresight, could see souls.
That was how she knew.
‘She is a monster.’
The elf before her was an Old Hag who had been born with the blessing of Talent and had polished it to the absolute limit over a vast span of time.
“You—you—you total bitch! Do you really want to die?! Who are you calling a chicken coop?! Your way of speaking is way more ‘chicken coop’ than mine!”
“...I never used the word chicken coop.”
“Shut up! I—I’m a High Elf, so in human years, I’m still nineteen! But you’re practically at low HP, you ancient fossil!”
“...Low HP? More importantly, even for a High Elf, a soul of your caliber...”
“Fuck, don’t dig into the details. I’ll give you exactly ten seconds. Get out of my sight. Otherwise, I’m going to beat the living shit out of you.”
“You are frivolous for your age... and I cannot grant your request.”
“You keep scratching at me by mentioning my age, huh? Hey, does this look like a request to you? This isn’t a request.”
Crack—
Elfriede cracked her wrists and slowly approached.
“That is far enough. Do not come any closer.”
“What, are you scared? I told you to run. You’ve still got five seconds left.”
“...I recognize that you are strong. However, look around you.”
“I’m looking. So what?”
“...Do you truly intend to face a Necromancer in a cemetery?”
“And if I do?”
“I can only call you a fool.”
“Ha! Hey, lady. Do you know what’s actually foolish?”
Elfriede snorted and took another step forward.
“Standing in front of me when I’m pissed off.”
“...I do not expect to be understood. Therefore, I shall make one final offer.”
Creeeak—! Skitter! Clack!
The moment Laura pulled a staff from beneath her robes, corpses sleeping beneath the graves clawed through the earth and rose.
“Child. If you withdraw now, I shall let you leave in peace. If not, you will suffer a gruesome fate.”
“Bullshit. Ah...! I really just wanted to go on a date today! ...And this fucking bitch ruined everything.”
Having said that, Elfriede scratched her head aggressively before her expression turned cold in an instant.
“Watch closely. And don’t you dare tell anyone about this.”
Whoosh—!
A massive pillar of fire erupted from behind Elfriede.
“This is what happens when a Super Genius Beauty High Elf gets angry!!”
*
Four hours before Elfriede and Laura met.
[...]
Ifrit, the Fire Spirit King, was currently deep in thought.
“No, not that! How many times do I have to tell you? A little higher... No! If you do that, my panties will show! I told you the panties shouldn’t be visible! Is this that hard to understand?”
He wasn't sure whether to praise Elfriede for her ability to command spirits of all four elements simultaneously or to curse her for pouring such immense talent into something so utterly useless.
[...Sigh.]
After a long deliberation, Ifrit decided to just let it be.
It was a choice based on two rational reasons.
First, Elfriede was not the kind of elf who listened to reason...
And second, even if Elfriede’s mana was being used for something pointless, it was a significant help for the ‘Lesser Spirits’ to evolve into ‘Mid-Class Spirits.’
Lesser Spirits, Mid-Class Spirits, High Spirits.
Based on the arbitrary standards set by humans, they might all seem the same, but the reality was entirely different.
Lesser Spirits were the essence of mana in nature itself.
Therefore, Lesser Spirits had neither ‘Form’ nor ‘Instinct’; they simply moved according to the Spirit Mage’s mana.
“No! Argh!!! The point is to make it look like they’re about to be seen but ultimately keep them hidden! Sigh... Have you seriously lost your touch?”
Thus, no matter how much she cursed at them, they couldn't understand; they simply followed the flow of Elfriede’s mana.
If one were to ask why she was hurling insults that wouldn't even register...
It was simply because Elfriede had a temperamental personality.
[...]
Regardless of her foul personality, Elfriede’s mana was a great boon to the spirits.
When a ‘Lesser Spirit’ consumed high-quality mana and grew over a long period, it very rarely developed an ‘Instinct,’ at which point it became a ‘Mid-Class Spirit.’
This was why Mid-Class Spirits took the form of animals.
They mimicked the animal that most closely resembled their own ‘Instinct.’
The reason many Spirit Mages failed at the Mid-Class level was that while Lesser Spirits could be handled with mere ‘Spirit Affinity’ and ‘Mana,’ Mid-Class Spirits could not be commanded unless one understood the spirit’s ‘Instinct.’
In that sense, a Spirit Mage who had contracted with a ‘Mid-Class Spirit’ could be considered a true Spirit Mage.
“Agh! Fuck! This is so frustrating!!! Don’t show the panties, just maximize the Absolute Territory!! Don’t you know the 4:1:2.5 Golden Ratio? If you don’t know, go study!!”
Finally, the ‘High Spirits.’
This was the stage reached when a Mid-Class Spirit that had lived for ages developed an ‘Ego’ against all odds.
At this stage, most High Spirits took on a human-like form. They didn't just seek contractors based on ‘Mana’ anymore; they had their own ‘Criteria.’ This made it extremely difficult for any race other than Elves—who possessed the ‘Blessing of the World Tree’—to contract with a High Spirit.
“Yes! Now you seem to get it!! The ‘about to be seen’ look! The feeling of wearing Modest Attire that somehow looks lewd!! This is it!! Now your sense is coming back!”
Of course, if one possessed overwhelming talent as a Spirit Mage, they could force a contract...
But even Ifrit had never seen anyone with that level of talent besides Elfriede.
[I have existed for a very long time, but you are the only one in the world who treats spirits this way.]
“Of course. Do you think this is easy? It’s damn hard. It’s only possible because I’m a Super Genius Beauty High Elf.”
[...]
As much as he hated to admit it, Elfriede was right.
Being able to contract with spirits of multiple attributes required significant talent, but controlling multiple attributes simultaneously was practically impossible.
The reason was simple.
「Dry Nature」 = Fire Spirit.
「Damp Nature」 = Water Spirit.
「Light Nature」 = Wind Spirit.
「Heavy Nature」 = Earth Spirit.
Every spirit desired mana that matched its nature.
In other words, to command the four great spirits simultaneously, one had to use contradictory mana—mana that was simultaneously dry yet damp, and light yet heavy.
It was something no one in history had ever achieved...
But Elfriede could.
“Now, this time, linger near the armpit for a bit and then move over there. No, wait... Sniff...! Okay. The scent is good too.”
[...]
However, the more he thought about it, the more tragic it seemed that such immense talent had been bestowed upon someone like Elfriede.
Of course, Ifrit had contracted with Elfriede because he felt that her overwhelming talent, combined with a personality that was anything but elf-like, could bring about the ‘Red Revolution’...
[I truly cannot understand. What does showing your armpits and letting him smell your body odor have to do with seducing a man?]
“Hmph! ...You’ve lived so long and yet you know nothing. Listen well. Fifty percent of a woman’s charm is in the armpits.”
[Sigh... Fine, let’s say that’s true. What is the other fifty percent?]
“Thighs. And it’s common sense that what comes from a beautiful girl’s armpits isn’t body odor—it’s a ‘fragrant virgin scent’ filled with pheromones. This is the scent that drives men crazy.”
[...I still do not understand.]
“Ha! This is why you beings without bodies are hopeless! Well, even without all this, it’d be weird if a Super Genius Beauty High Elf like me confessed and he didn't fall for it... but a tiger gives its all even when hunting a rabbit!”
The more he listened, the more Ifrit felt a throbbing in his non-existent temples. There was a reason the other Spirit Kings had given up on the revolution.
[Do as you wish.]
“The fact is, I was going to do whatever I wanted even without you saying that!”
Just as Ifrit was about to leave, thinking it was pointless to watch any longer, a familiar man entered his detection range.
[Elfriede.]
“Ah, what now?! I’m busy!”
[...]
Ugh!
For a moment, he considered staying silent, but he knew that if he didn't tell her and Ian caught her acting like this, she would whine about it for the next hundred years. He suppressed his irritation.
[It seems Ian is coming.]
“What? It’s not time for our appointment yet... Wait, what? He really is coming? Did he... did he want to see me that badly? No, more importantly, w-wait a second. Phew...”
Elfriede was momentarily flustered by Ian’s early arrival, but like an elf who had lived a long time, she calmed her heart with a single deep breath and whispered.
“Let’s just do it like we practiced. Don’t be nervous... Phew.”
Slide—
Elfriede closed and then opened her eyes. She slightly lowered her head, adopting a melancholic gaze as if she knew nothing.
[...]
Certainly, as long as she kept her mouth shut, Elfriede did feel like the ‘Beautiful Girl’ she claimed to be.
[I wish you would keep your mouth shut half as much as this normally.]
“Shit up end stey qiet.”
[Do you really think such a thing will work? Please, act with some common sense.]
“Dunt tukk tu me.”
As Elfriede lay in wait, the moment Ian came within range...
Snap!
The Lesser Spirits of wind lifted her one-piece dress just enough to reveal her ‘Absolute Territory,’ while simultaneously carrying the air filled with the ‘fragrant virgin scent’ from Elfriede’s armpits toward him.
[...]
There was no way such a thing would work.
No, it must not work.
If it did, Ifrit felt his mind—which had endured countless wars against demons alongside dragons before the Goddess Ellis descended to this land—wouldn't be able to handle it.
Whoosh—!
The moment the wind spirits, laden with the ‘fragrant virgin scent,’ brushed past Ian’s nose...
“...!!”
Ian’s eyes widened, and the look on his face as he stared at Elfriede changed.
It was an expression Ifrit knew all too well.
[...That actually worked?]
It was the look of a human falling in love.