Chapter 114: A Not-So-Ideal Gigolo Life (5)[R-18]
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 114: A Not-So-Ideal Gigolo Life (5)[R-18]
‘...That was a close one!’
I’d asked just in case, but I never imagined she actually hadn't taken a contraception potion.
I was truly relieved that Helen wasn't pregnant.
"D-Don't get the wrong idea! It’s not like Harini... I mean, I didn't think for a second that I wanted to become a mother soon just because a future child born between you and me would obviously be cute!! I just... I just got busy and forgot!!"
I made up my mind.
At the very least, until her identity as a ‘Gigolo’ came before her ‘Maternal Instincts,’ I would be thorough about contraception whenever I had relations with Helen.
"Right... I’m sure that’s what happened."
"Hmph! As long as you understand. Now, hurry up and cum so we can get this over with. I’m busy too, you know."
Slide—
Having said that, Helen presented her backside to me once more.
The way she stood slightly on her tiptoes to account for our height difference was quite endearing, but I couldn't break the resolution I’d just made.
"No, forget it. I’m not doing it today."
"W-What? Why the sudden change of heart?"
"You said it’s a dangerous day. I don't have a condom."
"Since when did a piece of trash like you care about things like that...!! I can just take a contraception potion later!"
As Helen approached me, looking like she was about to grab me by the collar, I spoke cautiously.
"...You’re not going to take the potion."
"W-W-What?! What kind of nonsense is that?! T-Take that back right now!! I-I told you, I just f-forgot last time!!"
To say her face was red would be an understatement; the boundary between her crimson hair and her face seemed to have vanished as she screamed.
"Fine. I’ll take it back, so just calm down."
"Y-You’d better! I-I-If anyone heard you, they’d think I actually w-wanted to have a child with you or something!"
"...But what if you 'forget' again this time?"
"I w-won't!! Do you really think Helen Redrose would repeat the same mistake twice?!"
Somehow, I had a feeling that the ‘mistake’ Helen was referring to was the exact opposite of what I was thinking...
‘...Even if I ask her now, she’ll never admit it.’
Experience told me that changing the subject entirely was the best move in situations like this.
"No, why are you being so pushy? Do you really want to have sex with me that badly?"
"W-When did I say I wanted to have sex?! I just meant that if we’re going to do it anyway, I’d rather g-get it over with so I can go back!"
Honestly, Helen was being so cute that I almost wanted to feign ignorance and give in to the temptation.
I couldn't help it.
What man on earth would dislike it when a woman as beautiful and talented as Helen acted like she wanted to get pregnant with his child?
However, if I gave in and got Helen pregnant, there would undoubtedly be a severe backlash.
‘Evelyn might actually stab me...’
I had received permission from Evelyn for a harem of up to ten women, but in exchange, I had promised that she would be the one to have the first pregnancy.
But in this situation, if I suddenly introduced a pregnant Helen to Evelyn?
...The mere thought of it sent shivers down my spine.
"That’s why I’m letting you go. You said you had to leave quickly."
"No... I mean, even so, how could you actually just send me... Ah! W-Wait a minute!"
Rustle—
As I tried to pull my pants back up, Helen shouted urgently and pulled a condom out from deep within her wallet.
"I... I just remembered I had one condom."
"...."
"W-What! What’s with that look?! It’s not like I prepared this specifically for you, okay? I-It’s just... I heard a rumor that keeping a condom in your wallet helps you save money!!"
I hadn't even said anything, yet Helen was already making excuses.
"So, that settles it, right? Like I said, I’m busy, so hurry up and—"
"Sorry, but I can't use this."
"Augh!! Why are men so picky?! What’s the problem now!! You have a condom now!! The window of time in your life where you can have relations with an elite woman like me is only one semester, you know? Aren't you wasting precious time?"
"No... the condom size is wrong."
"W-What did you say?"
"The condom is too small. It won't fit on my cock."
Helen looked back and forth between the condom and my face, then whispered softly.
"T-That can't be... I... I got the... biggest one?"
"If you don't believe me, try putting it on."
"Hmph! Acting all p-proud just because your cock is a little big... Don't you know that the most important thing about a condom is its elasticity...? Eh? Huh? Wh-What! Hey! ...W-Why won't this go on!! If I do it like this, and like this, it should go on, shouldn't it?!"
"I told you, the size is wrong."
I felt bad for Helen, but a mere ‘Human XXL Condom’ wasn't enough to wrap around my dick.
A ‘Demonic XXL Condom’ might barely fit, but...
Even those kept tearing, so at some point, I gave up and started relying mostly on contraception potions.
"Y-You’re not human...!! H-How does it make sense that an XXL condom is too small to fit?"
"If you want to have sex that badly, bring a Demonic XXL or a contraception potion next time. If you buy the human ones like this time, they won't fit."
"Who said they wanted to do it! H-Hmph! If it doesn't fit... then that’s actually for the best!! Unlike you, I’d prefer to have relations one less day if possible!!"
"For someone who says that, your love juice is practically dripping."
"Th-That’s just a physiological phenomenon!! And since you’re a man, you probably don't know, but do you have any idea how disgusting contraception potions taste?"
Helen seemed to assume I didn't know the taste of the potion, but I had actually tried a bit of it myself.
‘It really was horrifyingly tasteless...’
There was a reason Evelyn was so overjoyed when she found a new type of condom at the ‘Porling Merchant Guild.’
The contraception potion was at a level where even Lady Yuris, who enjoyed bizarre foods like Mint-Choco Chicken and Barley Cola, described it as "questionable."
‘Ah, is that why Helen didn't drink it?’
I realized that for Helen, who had a unique constitution where her sense of taste and touch were shared, drinking a contraception potion might feel like a form of torture.
‘...I feel a bit bad.’
Now that the thought had occurred to me, I felt a pang of guilt toward Helen.
"...And you! You said you had no intention of coveting the Redrose fortune! Isn't telling me to buy condoms also using the Redrose fortune?!"
"No... just how many condoms are you planning to buy that it would use up the Redrose fortune... Even I can't cum that much."
"Th-Th-Th-That’s not what I meant!!"
As Helen’s jaw dropped in shock, I gave a small smirk.
"It’s a joke. But since I’ll make you drink the potion and use you once they’re all gone, you’d better buy a lot."
"...U-Using me again! You t-trash!!! You really are human trash!!!"
"Ugh.. They said it was a sure thing...! Th-They’ve been right every time until now... Ugh... But why!!! Why do they get it wrong the moment I put money on it!!"
Rip! Rip!
Poporing, looking over the newspaper, screamed as she tore up her betting tickets.
She had invested her entire fortune based on information that she could at least quintuple her money, but in an instant, it had all turned into scraps of paper.
"Uuuugh... If I’d known this would happen... I should have just paid the rent..."
If she hadn't wasted it on gambling, she could have covered her overdue rent and research expenses with the down payment and the money from the items taken on credit...
But it was far too late for regrets.
—Slide
As Poporing turned her gaze, she saw a desk covered in dildos and condoms.
"Wh-What should I do? If I don't produce any results like this, I’ll have to return the money..."
Was it because this request was for a condom needed purely for erotic acts?
For the first time in her life, she had hit a wall while crafting something.
Of course, as a professional Artificer, Poporing had worked hard to create the ultimate ‘condom.’
She had gone around town buying and analyzing extra-large dildos and various types of condoms, and she had even visited the library to look through theses and books on male anatomy.
But...
Nowhere was there any mention of a cock the size of a forearm.
‘...B-But s-surely... he won't... r-run off without paying the rest... r-right? No way. Someone who gave me such a kind look...’
Actually, to call the look "kind" was a stretch, considering the items he took on credit reeked of criminal intent...
Poporing tried her best not to think too deeply about that part.
—Tap, tap—
[Author: MojitoDelivery■]
[Guys, is there a big difference between a dildo and a real cock?][18]
Aren't dildos made to mimic cocks in the first place? If they're that different, isn't that a problem?
ChildhoodFriendRapist■: Lmao ㅋ you think they're the same? ㅋㅋㅋ Of course they're different ㅋㅋ
ㄴ MojitoDelivery■: Have you used a dildo?
ㄴ ChildhoodFriendRapist■: Why would I use a dildo when I have a biological one ㅋ And how can a fake ever beat the real thing?
ㄴ MojitoDelivery■: Can you explain in detail... what’s so different?
ㄴ ChildhoodFriendRapist■: ㅋㅋㅋ Well, for starters, the smell, the body heat, the pulse...
ㄴ ChildhoodFriendRapist■: Ah, it’s hard to explain ㅋ You’d know if you just had sex ㅋㅋ
ㄴ Anonymous(154.55): This one’s really acting high and mighty just cuz she had sex once...
ㄴ UseNiceWordsOnly■: For real ㅋㅋ She’s probably lying about having sex too. As if a forearm-sized one is even possible.
ㄴ Anonymous(737.168): Obviously a delusion ㅋㅋㅋ All the guys I’ve met so far weren't even half the size of a forearm.
ㄴ ChildhoodFriendRapist■: My boyfriend’s really is the size of a forearm ㅋ
ㄴ MojitoDelivery■: Please, give me a serious answer... it’s important... If it’s a forearm-sized cock, how big is it before an erection?
ㄴ ChildhoodFriendRapist■: Dunno ㅋ That bastard gets so horny just looking at me that he’s hard all the time.
ㄴ UseNiceWordsOnly■: This virgin’s delusions are pathetic. Where would you even find a forearm-sized cock ㅋㅋㅋㅋ
ㄴ ChildhoodFriendRapist■: Just because you haven't seen it doesn't mean it doesn't exist, you old hag ㅋ
ㄴ UseNiceWordsOnly■: A rapist calling someone a hag, lmao ㅋㅋㅋㅋ
ㄴ ChildhoodFriendRapist■: First you call me a virgin, then a rapist, make up your mind ㅋㅋㅋ Anyway, you probably wouldn't get eaten cuz you smell like a chicken coop ㅋㅋ
Poporing had posted a question in the Gallery, hoping to catch at even a straw...
But as expected, no useful information came up at all.
"...Uuuugh... Truly useless."
Now that it had come to this, there was only one way left.
Slide—
Poporing pulled out the student ID that had been left as collateral for the credit and clenched her fist tight.
‘...The real thing! I have to see the real thing!’