Chapter 67
Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 67
Chapter Title: The Internet is a Dangerous Civilization!
While Lulu and Arin played in the yard...
I couldn't resist the fairy's desperate, pleading gaze that begged for an explanation, so I gave her a brief rundown of the situation.
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"The king you spoke of is now deep in slumber."
After explaining that Arin was a homunculus—a clone—made from that king's scales...
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"A mere human made that possible...?"
"It's the truth. My master may be just a human, but he's a supreme alchemist capable of such feats. As a colored fairy among your kind, you should be able to tell if I'm lying."
"That's exactly why I can't believe it! How can a mere human claim to have done something even our queen couldn't, and why is it true?!"
"Hey, that human you're talking about feels offended, so watch your words."
"Ah, sorry. Benefactor. As a fairy, I just can't lie..."
"Orcs aren't great at sugarcoating either. Forgive her, Master."
"...These two?"
Thwack!!!
"Eek—!? W-Why...? Why does a human's knuckle rap hurt so much—!!!"
"Because my master is a human who can unleash aura on the level of an orc lord. By the way, Master, that was a pretty solid aura knuckle rap. No need to worry about it exploding like last time."
"Thanks for the praise, but you're not hurting?"
"Of course not. If this much hurt, I couldn't serve as your weapon."
"Fair enough."
Anyway, after smacking both of them for being cheeky...
The fairy, rubbing her stinging head from my aura-infused knuckle rap, suddenly remembered something urgent and hurriedly relayed the facts to her queen.
A moment later...
[The Owner of the Fairy Flower Garden is flustered upon learning that her king has reincarnated as a young girl!]
[The Owner of the Fairy Flower Garden is pacing anxiously, not knowing what to do.]
[The Owner of the Fairy Flower Garden stands up abruptly, declaring that this won't do!]
We could tell from the notification windows sent by the queen, now aware of the truth, that her reaction was far from ordinary.
Not knowing what unexpected situation might unfold, we watched tensely.
But that lasted only a moment.
[The Owner of the Fairy Flower Garden shouts to bring every Memory Bubble Flower in the garden right now!]
[The Owner of the Fairy Flower Garden orders her subordinate fairies not to miss even a moment of the king's appearance.]
"...What the heck is that? What's a Memory Bubble Flower?"
"It's a flower that records what you're seeing if you have it. The queen always regretted not being able to record the king's achievements."
Well, she suddenly started recording with bubble flowers due to some past circumstances.
But still, recording Arin's appearance without permission felt off, so just as I was about to say something...
[The Owner of the Fairy Flower Garden, in her haste, apologizes for her rude actions without asking permission and sponsors 3x 'Fairy Golden Apples'!]
[Fairy Golden Apple] [A+]
A golden apple grown by fairies through special methods.
[Effect]: Greatly increases magic power upon consumption.
"Ahem... No, you didn't have to."
[The Owner of the Fairy Flower Garden says it's a gift out of a desire to maintain good relations going forward, so please don't refuse.]
"...If you insist that much, I guess I have no choice."
Well... she did it in her haste and apologized with some sincerity, wanting to keep good relations.
So, I decided to let the fairy queen's rudeness slide this time.
"We can be good neighbors. Fairy Queen."
"Master. Your eyes are full of greed right now. You look just like a golden goblin."
"Shut it. The world runs on calculations."
Just as I'd gained a major client neighbor like the fairy queen, who had plenty to offer and spent generously...
My two daughters, who had been dashing around the house playing hero, came up to me.
"Daddy-nyang. Can we go play in the back mountain, nyang?"
"The back mountain?"
"We need a big space to play while using our skills wildly!"
"Hmm... Fair point."
They must want to go wild with skills to celebrate getting their transformation gear.
Knowing the house wouldn't survive if they did it indoors, they were asking to head to the back mountain.
"I'll pack you some lunches, so wait a sec."
"Lulu wants one packed full of meat, nyang!"
"Arin likes ones packed full of fish!"
There was no reason to stop my daughters from going out to play.
After making them a meat-packed lunch and a fish-packed lunch respectively...
"Won't the maknae come, nyang?"
[Now that I have a body next time, I'll come along.]
"What about you, fairy?"
"I'd love to go... Um... Benefactor...?"
"If Arin invited you, go ahead."
"Yay! Thank you, Benefactor!"
Tabula decided to stay home and wait for next time.
Lulu and Arin grabbed their lunches and headed to the back mountain with the fairy.
With my two daughters gone, the house fell silent in an instant.
Sitting there, blankly enjoying the rare quiet, Tabula suddenly spoke up.
[Father. What will you do now?]
"Dunno? If nothing comes up, I was thinking of climbing the tower and meeting the PhD... Oh, right, can't meet the PhD until tomorrow because of the elixir."
"Master. Can't climb the tower today either. The penalty for skipping up to the 15th floor is still active."
"Oh yeah, that penalty... When does that go away?"
"Not long now. It'll disappear after you reclaim your old form once more."
Hmm... So, summarizing today's schedule.
Can't climb the tower, PhD is tied up refining the elixir so can't meet, and my daughters are off playing in the back mountain.
Only thing left is synthesis, I guess?
"Haven't had a day this free in ages."
Ever since awakening as a Climber, I'd been constantly doing or forced to do something every day.
Today, circumstances aligned to leave me with nothing pressing.
[Then will you do synthesis today?]
"That seems best. Anything worth making?"
[I don't think there's anything urgent to make right now.]
Hmm... Come to think of it, since Tabula was born, I've made whatever I wanted right away, so nothing's pending.
"Nothing to do for real."
That leaves gallery browsing as the only option, but...
I didn't want to dive into a flood of crap posts unless searching for info.
But that thought didn't last.
"...How about checking the request board instead of the gallery?"
Early on, I avoided it fearing management scrutiny, but now the gallery bait about me has died down.
My identity's fully laundered, so taking requests shouldn't be an issue.
And above all...
[Based on your gallery activity records, I've selected Climbers qualified to trade with you, Father!]
[Shall I display requests worth your time from them?]
I had Tabula, my reliable daughter who could handle any situation.
"Please do, Tabula."
[Tabula will prioritize personality and filter for requests solvable by alchemy!]
[...Searching...]
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[...Search complete...]
[Here's a request from a Climber with impeccable character and ties to you, Father!]
"Ties to me? What do you...?"
"...Huh?"
I wondered what she meant by ties to me, and there was my very first customer after awakening.
I was briefly stunned by the familiar nickname I hadn't seen in a while.
But Tabula's following words snapped me back to focus on the present.
[Father. May I share the results of my search on the requester (Bug Hater)'s gallery activity?]
"Uh... Yeah, go ahead."
[From what Tabula confirmed, the requester has no history of stirring conflicts or violating rules in gallery activities. No signs of inciting groups or making aggressive comments either!]
"Hmm... Not a troll, then."
[Yes! Their activity was mostly reading info, and the occasional questions were practical ones about strategies or survival! This confirmed they're a Climber in the mid-tier small guild 'Javelin'!]
"Pretty upstanding. Impressive, though? Figuring out the guild from question content."
[Anyone caught by Tabula is toast! And that's not all!]
"Not the end?"
[Yes! A net search on the info I just found shows 'Bug Hater' is the vice-guild master handling operations and personnel! A core figure deeply involved in guild management!]
"Whoa, digging that deep. You're amazing, Tabul...">
[And more! Leaked internal guild evals show high marks in leadership and crisis survival judgment, so they're highly regarded internally!]
"...Tabula?"
[And more! More! Checking Bug Hater's SNS confirmed they're childhood friends with guild master Park Hyun-soo!]
"Uh... Tabula? That's enough now...">
[No! Father! The highlight's coming up!]
[Bug Hater is currently one-sidedly crushing on the guild master, as casually mentioned in guild members' SNS!]
[Based on this, I infer the request is a pretext to seduce their childhood friend!]
"Tabula! Stop, please! No more...!"
[And finally, for real this time! Hacking Bug Hater's private SNS shows it's full of posts about wanting to...]
"...Ah."
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Tabula finally stopped her rampage after exposing Bug Hater's personal info (Yu Jia, 29, virgin) and the secret that they relieve urges with photos of their childhood friend (guild master Park Hyun-soo) on their private SNS.
I decided to accept the request if only out of pity for Bug Hater.
[Father... Sorry...]
"It's fine, first time and all. Just... Tabula, let's hold back on hacking accounts from now on?"
[Yes...]