69. The Reckless Results of Telling Aisha the Truth
She seemed to have taken a massive mental hit.
"Me... a spinster elf... a monster that drains the youth out of men...?"
...Realizing she'd unknowingly become a freak must be messing her up bad.
She looked just like a ghost who didn't know she was dead, repeating her old habits from life—until she suddenly learned the truth.
As I gazed at her pitifully, Aisha started defending herself to me.
"N-no, that's not me!! I've never once thought of men that way!!!"
"......"
...She says it's not true, but honestly, I'm not buying it.
I could buy that she didn't know the urban legend about spinster elves because she doesn't browse the gallery.
But that doesn't mean there were no victims, right?
An elf who's lived over 400 years.
God knows how many men got shredded during that time.
If anything, the lack of self-awareness might make her even worse...
Maybe my ambiguous reaction prompted it, but she shouted out more self-defense.
"I-I've turned down every confession I've gotten because of work!!"
"......Hmm."
Well, maybe that was back when she was young? It's disappointing, but that's not enough to change my mind.
"And... I've been so obsessed with research that I've never even dated a guy once..."
"......Huh."
I don't know the scope of what she means by "dating."
She might see filling her self-esteem with men as "predation" rather than "dating."
Anyway, it's still ambiguous...
Maybe my lukewarm reaction got to her, because her face turned red as she spilled even more embarrassing info.
"P-plus, I probably have more... s-sex drive than other elves... so if we dated, I'd definitely want to do... that!!"
"Oh..."
"Huh?"
Whoops, slip-up.
"......Ahem."
But how much is "more sex drive," exactly? Without numbers compared to her kin, I can't let my guard down here either.
Her standard for "a lot" is probably just her own perception.
If "high sex drive" for elves means happy time once a year, then...
"I... don't really know. You didn't give exact numbers, so that 'high' sex drive might be way below human standards. Just 'more than kin' doesn't tell me much."
"What do you...?"
"Some studies say adult human men masturbate 2-3 times a week on average. How often do elves? Once a year? Once a decade? Tell me, Aisha noona. What's your cycle?"
"I... um... per week..."
"...Per week?"
Aisha's face grew beet red before she finally realized the conversation had gone off the rails and yelled.
"Wait, why am I even telling you this!?"
"Huh...? Yeah, why'd it come to this?"
Hmm... anyway, from what I heard, she's a rare spinster elf desperately seeking a mate...
'Mate... mate, huh...'
Come to think of it, one question popped up.
"One thing I'm curious about—why not date your own kind? I don't get why a long-lived race like elves would want to pair up with short-lived ones."
"Oh, that? Elves don't prefer marrying kin because we get bored with each other too fast. We don't change much with our long lives. Short-lived races have higher life density, so marriage satisfaction is on another level. Every day is fun, they say?"
What the hell... has this world gone dopamine-crazy too?
"...What if your spouse dies first?"
"I'd try to keep them alive as long as possible... but if not, oh well. Long-lived races have good memories, so we'd spend our remaining days reminiscing. By then, we'd have kids anyway, so it wouldn't be too lonely."
"...What about species reproduction...?"
"Oh, worried about hybrids being infertile? Don't be. With luck, interspecies breeding produces perfectly fine elves."
It's a gacha...
"If you and I married and had kids, they could be elves or humans. Of course, as hybrids, they'd inherit a bit from both... I think my strong sex drive comes from not being pureblood myself."
"Ah... ha?"
Genetics where one trait dominates? This world is wild...
'Not sure if that's just an elf thing.'
What would kids with Luna the beastkin be like...?
Someday, I'll have to experiment myself...
"Even so, elves have low fertility, so having kids is tough."
Elves just don't multiply much due to low fertility and sex drive.
"Anyway, unless you're a high elf born from the world tree, there's no need to obsess over pureblood."
...Maybe the world outside the shelter back then had all these races getting along better than I thought...?
I vaguely pondered that as we wrapped up and headed home.
*
Since we were going the same way, we walked together, but she still looked like she hadn't accepted the spinster elf truth.
"Ha... I haven't even dated once..."
"......"
"Me, a spinster monster...? The terror of young men...? Haha..."
"......"
This is awkward...
The uncomfortable silence dragged on until we reached home.
"...Thanks for today."
"Yeah... I had fun too..."
She's on the third floor, I'm on the second, so time to part... but she was staring at me instead of going up.
I started sweating bullets for no reason.
"...Soo-chan."
"...Yeah."
"You're not dating that employee lady, right?"
"......Not yet."
This is getting scary. For real...
"Then maybe with me..."
"Aisha noona!!!"
I cut her off before she could finish.
The manual emphasized the art of the follow-up preemptive strike—seizing control of the conversation flow.
I interrupted, but now what...?
Aisha's state right now seems like someone who jumped into the marriage market too late, only to find her stock delisted, drowning in despair.
In that case... just set her up with someone?
Most manual victims were info-poor young guys.
That means guys oblivious to spinster elf legends exist somewhere.
Find one and pair him with Aisha...
If she's serious about marriage, they'll be happy... if not...
'Gasp, then that guy...'
Crazy... what I'm about to do is just passing the bomb.
A bomb that might be a dud, though.
...The world is cruel. For someone to be happy, someone else has to take the misery.
'Yeah, admit it—not everyone can be happy...'
And if he's lucky, he gets a timeless beauty wife...
Aisha could be a winning lottery ticket, right?
I'm not dumping inevitable doom... this is like a fortune cookie.
After maxing out my self-justification, I told Aisha.
"Noona, I'll help you find a mate."
"...Pardon?"
*
Aisha was a bit confused by Soo-chan's words.
'Help me find a mate...?'
Honestly... right now, no other guy interested her besides the one in front of her.
Even if she could meet others, it didn't appeal...
Still... she wanted more connection with him for now.
"......Okay. Will you help?"
"Okay, then see you at lunch, noona. And no dongtan look!! Dress as immature as possible when you come out. Like... academy uniform?"
She got the "look young" part... but...
...What's a dongtan look?
*
A few hours later, lunchtime.
"H-how's this? I dressed as young as possible..."
"Uh......"
I told her to look young, but...
This looks less like dressing young and more like she stole a kid's clothes...?
Specifically, high school uniform vibes.
"I... borrowed an academy uniform... does it suit me?"
It suits her... I can't say otherwise right now, but the visual is violently striking.
The uniform was blatantly too small—her chest looked ready to burst, and the skirt didn't fit, so... yeah, thighs fully exposed.
"...I borrowed the largest size from a friend... it's a bit small, haha..."
"A bit" doesn't cover it... the wrinkled skirt looks like a butt curtain...
Still... by my standards,
'It's pretty damn hot.'
Thinking that might be rude, but her age-mismatched, desperate look is super appealing.
For data collection, maybe deploy as-is?
"...Shall we go?"
"L-like this?"
"...It suits you better than I thought, so don't worry."
...Probably.
"Oh, and wanna tweak your hairstyle to look even younger?"
She tied her hair up as I suggested.
"...You really want me going out like this?"
Insane.
Her look right now goes beyond "violent"—it's overwhelming.
Whoa... honestly, it feels like a stretch, but data comes first.
"Let's go for real now!"
"...Ugh."
From here on, to find an oblivious guy ignorant of spinster elf lore, she'll have to hit on as many people as possible.
*
A dark alley in the shelter where few people passed.
It connected to the main road, so someone came by every 2-3 minutes.
As a guy in his mid-20s walked through, someone called from behind.
"...Um, excuse me...! Hey, o-oppa!! Got time to h-hang out with me?"
"...Me?"
The guy turned, and his eyes went wide at her beauty.
Her face was shadowed, but the silhouette alone screamed stunner.
Especially her figure—he couldn't peel his eyes off below her neck.
Her outfit was weirdly like a too-small uniform crammed on, but it highlighted her curves in a super erotic way.
Plus, her shy posture was weirdly captivating.
He snorted hot breath and approached Aisha.
His gaze trailed from her thighs up to her face.
When he got close enough to see her in the dark,
Locking eyes with her amethyst gaze, he gasped.
'...Jackpot!!'
She looked his age or older, but who cares why she called him oppa—this beauty made it irrelevant.
"Whatcha wanna do with me, hehe..."
As he grinned sleazily and closed in, her full form came into view.
He froze—
"Huh...?"
Something's off.
Her ears... long...?
Hidden by her twin tails silhouette till now, her long ears hit him.
Seeing them, his face drained pale.
"H-hiiik!!! S-sorry...!!"
He backpedaled, begging forgiveness for some reason.
"Huh? No, that's not—"
As confused Aisha stepped closer,
He tripped, ass-planting.
"Ow!!"
Thud—
Aisha hurried over, worried.
"You okay?"
"Eek...!!"
He crab-walked backward on the ground like a dragoon.
Scamper-scamper—
Then flipped and crawled away.
"I-I'm marriedI'mmarriedI'mmarriedI'mmarried!!!!!!"
Chanting "married" like a mantra against a demon, he vanished from sight.
Aisha froze, hand outstretched toward his retreating back.
"......Ah."
Watching it all, I jotted in my notebook.
"Hmm... yeah, this method definitely ain't it..."
Especially the twin tails—that was the killer.
*
While Soo-chan and Aisha hunted guys,
A new hot topic bubbled up in the gallery.
Finally, Starlight Lake Park opens tomorrow.