My Ability
The woman pursed her lips. I leaned in closer, bringing my face nearer to hers, and spoke in a voice even softer, even warmer.
"And your family? Is nothing weighing on them? While you fight so hard against the world, are they failing to be the umbrella you need?"
My words pulled the trigger. Her face crumpled completely, and tears welled in her eyes. Something had broken open inside her. Suddenly she flung her arms around me.
"Lord Jisin…"
She clung to my neck and began to cry. So it was family after all—that was where her pain lived. In truth, a great many people show their softest spot when the subject turns to family. I had meant to press on that wound, but I hadn't expected her to collapse so completely, so soon. For a moment I was thrown off balance—yet I knew that the more she came apart, the more warmth I had to give her. That, it seemed, was my real gift: even when the words themselves were ordinary, I could make a person listen with their whole heart.
I held her in return. When I straightened, she rose with me. She pressed herself against my body and sobbed so hard her chest shook against mine. I held her and rubbed her back.
"That's it… Let every hard year you've carried pour out with those tears…"
She tightened her arms around my neck. My breath caught a little, but I gritted my teeth and endured it. Breaking the mood now would ruin everything. She wept for nearly five minutes before the strength in her arms finally slackened. She took a step back and lowered her head.
"I'm sorry."
Still looking down, she removed her glasses and wiped her eyes. I smiled with gentle kindness.
"If I've been of any help, there's nothing to apologize for."
I guided her back into her chair and returned to my own seat. As if the outburst had never happened, the cool mask settled over her face once more.
"I'm sorry. My emotions just… got the better of me."
I waved a hand.
"That's exactly why we are here. If you ever need to lean on me again, you may do so whenever you wish."
She sniffled and spoke.
"Everything you said is true, Lord Jisin. Even the first time I came here—half believing, half doubting—things were already going badly at home. But listening to you gave me courage. It gave me peace. When Go Myeongsuk suggested the Seongyodan, I almost refused at first. Still, that feeling stayed with me, so I came back to see you before I decided. And then…"
She lifted her head, met my eyes directly, and let a faint smile touch her lips. She was a beautiful woman when she smiled, I thought.
"When I was told I had to remove all my clothes before coming in to meet you, I felt resistance. But I think I understand the meaning now. And I think I understand why you seated me so far away, too. So that a person could look into their own lonely heart."
Huh? That wasn't the idea at all… But it does sound rather impressive when she puts it that way. Fine. We'll go with that.
"I've made up my mind. Even if I have to stake everything I am, I want to serve as one of your Seongyodan. There is still so much I need to awaken to, and so much more of your love I need to receive—but please allow me to work among the missionaries."
She rose from her seat with sudden force.
"From this day forward, in the pure form I was born with, I will give my utmost for Cheonsiman-gyo—and for you, Lord Jisin."
Watching the same woman who had been sobbing moments earlier shout like that almost made me laugh, but I crushed the impulse with everything I had. I simply nodded. If I opened my mouth, the laugh would escape. She bowed to me with a brightness that had not been there when she entered, then started to turn away—only to glance back once more.
"Then… as a privilege of serving directly under the cult leader, might I treat you to a private dinner sometime? I'd like to hear more of your wise words over a meal. And share a little of my own story as well."
I smiled my benevolent smile and nodded. She turned away with a radiant face. Her hips were so lovely that her retreating figure was even more beautiful than the front. Once she was gone, I let out a long breath. She had been a difficult opponent, but I had closed the matter reasonably well.
A little later, Yoonchae came in.
"Today's schedule is finished. Would you like to have dinner together?"
The moment I saw her, I felt the need for a little comfort of my own. I beckoned her closer. When she approached, I stood, pulled her into my arms, and laid her down on the bed. Then I kissed her. She offered not the slightest resistance, and I stayed like that for a long while, kneading her breasts.
When our mouths finally parted, Yoonchae spoke with her eyes slightly unfocused.
"Shall I tell them to hold dinner for a bit?"
So she had gotten a little worked up herself. I nodded. She rose from the bed and started toward the internal line—when the phone rang. Yoonchae answered without hesitation, then turned and gestured for me. I took the receiver. It was Myeongsuk.
"What on earth did you do? Representative Gu Yeonsu is famous for being sharp as a blade. I was even a little uneasy when I sent her up. But if we could win her over, our circle could expand across the entire capital region… and now she's completely melted? You're incredible, as always."
I hadn't realized how good it felt to be praised. I spoke with her in a thoroughly pleased mood, and Myeongsuk invited me down to the dining hall—said she would even prepare drinks so we could all eat together. While I was still on the phone, I glanced at Yoonchae. Her expression said she already knew exactly what Myeongsuk and I were discussing.
I hung up, pulled Yoonchae into my arms again, and whispered against her ear.
"She wants us all to eat together. After dinner tonight, sleep with me."
Yoonchae nodded. At some point she had stopped arguing with anything I said, stopped pushing back against anything I did. It wasn't the look of someone merely being dragged along—it was the look of genuine submission. I wondered for a moment whether she had simply given up on herself, but that didn't seem to be it. Yoonchae was the kind of person whose face and manner gave nothing away, so I decided I would have a real, honest conversation with her later that night.
We gathered in the dining hall, shared a meal, and had a few drinks. It was a pleasant enough gathering. After Myeongsuk and Yongjin left with the kitchen aunties, I went up to the third floor with Yoonchae and Miryeong. Miryeong watched me carefully, but when she saw that Yoonchae and I were going together, she slipped straight into her own room. Yoonchae and I went to my bedroom, showered together, and climbed into bed. I had meant to talk with her about something—but I sank into her body instead, spent my lust, and fell asleep. The mental strain must have caught up with me after all.
The next day there were interviews with three more candidates. Myeongsuk called early, and under a sense of duty I flipped through the files stacked on the desk. Then I froze. The first candidate I was scheduled to meet today was a man. Which meant he, too, would walk into this room naked. The thought of a naked man entering this chamber made my face twist without my permission. And he was not young.
The gatherings of Cheonsiman-gyo were overwhelmingly female. That did not mean there were no men at all. When I looked out over the crowd during my talks, I sometimes spotted men's faces—though they were almost always very old. This candidate was listed as fifty-one, self-employed. Compared to the grandfathers among the believers, he was relatively young.
Honestly, men of that age, even if they held a faith, tended not to be active in it. Crushed by the demands of working life, they found it hard enough to carve out a weekend for a church, a cathedral, or a temple—and even the devout struggled to keep every observance. It wasn't a matter of faith so much as reality. And if even the major religions had trouble holding them, turning up for the meetings of a small, nameless group like ours was no small thing.
In that light, anyone willing to take on missionary work was remarkable—and I wondered whether I ought to be thanking him rather than interviewing him. I was still turning the thought over when Myeongsuk called again.
"Mo Juhyeon is the one I've been working on hardest. He ran a business in the produce market for years, and his network is beyond anything we can imagine. Half-joking, people say he knows half of Seoul. I know his wife well, and he himself only started coming to our gatherings recently. I begged him for the favor, and he agreed to help—so please take good care of him."