Arachne's Vulnerability
"I-I'm sorry..! I knew asking you for something like this was a bad idea..!"
Her embarrassment finally reaching its peak, she shook her head vigorously and apologized before trying to lift her lowered body to escape. As her folded legs touched the floor again and she attempted to rise, the sight of her abdomen twitching and shifting with each movement sent a chill through me.
"Uh, uh.."
Wanting her to stay down, I unconsciously reached out with both hands to stop her. But I never expected what happened next.
"Kyaa?!"
My outstretched hands landed squarely on the rear of her half-raised body. I had no particular awareness of it, but to her, the spot my hand touched was no different from her embarrassingly large backside.
A sharp, startled scream rang out, and at the same time her legs seemed to lose all strength. Thud..! Just as I had imagined from its solid appearance and size, her heavy body dropped to the floor with a deep, resonant impact despite the short fall. For her, it must have been the most humiliating sound imaginable.
"Ah... aah.."
Arachne covered her face with both hands and bowed her head low, her shoulders trembling violently with a lethal dose of shame.
"...I'm sorry... My hand... suddenly touched you.."
Even in that moment, she apologized in a trembling voice. Feeling sorry for her, I managed to speak despite my eyes darting helplessly over the massive spider lower body sprawled before me.
"I'm the one who should apologize. I must have startled you by... touching you so suddenly. If it made you uncomfortable, I'll apologize again."
It had been an unconscious motion, like reaching out to catch something falling, meant only to press her rising lower body back down. But the timing had been off, and my hand had landed not on the thick carapace of her back, but on the softer area near her abdomen. The sensation lingered on my fingertips—slightly softer than the dorsal shell, yet still firm and strangely smooth.
If she was this embarrassed from just a light touch of my palm, how on earth had she planned to endure me inserting my arm inside? A ridiculous thought crossed my mind: what if, with my arm inside, she panicked and closed the entrance? Would those hard outer plates simply shear it off?
"N-no... You're the one who must have felt disgusted having something like that touch your hand.."
"Please don't jump to conclusions like that.."
"I... know. This body of mine... it's just disgusting. The hideous size and shape... the dark color that's not cute at all... the terrifying hardness... none of it suits a woman.."
Though no sobbing sounds escaped her, the pain in her voice made it clear how desperately she was suppressing her emotions. I knew I shouldn't pity her so openly, yet my voice carried the sympathy she probably didn't want to hear.
"Miss Arachne.."
"You've heard everything. You think the same way about me, don't you...?"
'I should never have let you see me like this... I should never have let you treat me like a normal woman.'
Though my step had been a mistake, it had given me a crucial hint about why she had withdrawn. She had heard everything. What? When? Where? ...And from whom?
I had made an error, yet gained valuable information purely by chance. Even so, I had to take the next step. If I stopped here, both of us would sink together into an atmosphere that would shift from embarrassment to awkwardness, then to discomfort.
"But... it's all right. Yes, I'm fine with it."
"..."
Rather than her outward appearance, I could hear the voice within her heart. I knew many of her good qualities, and as a counselor, it was also my job to quietly listen when someone needed to cry. Instead of immediately denying her self-deprecation, I tried to convey my different perspective through a slow, careful process of reassurance.
Yet this stifling feeling in my chest—what was it? While wondering how to express my thoughts without hurting her, I suddenly felt my heart tighten as if stuffed with wet cotton at her single word: "it's all right."
Probably because even the voice in her heart was weakly murmuring the same thing—that she was fine. I wished she would at least admit inwardly that she wasn't okay, but the way she spoke made it clear she had grown accustomed to this, that she knew I was no different from everyone else she had met, that she believed she had no choice but to accept such gazes.
That resigned tone didn't make me angry. It made me sad. Because I could tell that her resignation didn't stem from any weakness or laziness of her own, but from the fear and disgust she had received from others until now—and the resulting injustice and self-loathing.
"Miss Arachne..!"
"Hic?!"
Unable to bear the tightness in my chest any longer, my voice came out sharper than intended. It seemed to have caught her attention sufficiently.
"You may be right. I might find you disgusting, hideous, not cute, or unfeminine."
"I... I..."
"To be honest, even I... yes, I'm still not completely used to dealing with you, Miss Arachne."
Her head drooped even lower at my honest confession. I couldn't bring myself to say "no, you're not disgusting" or "you're special" with false sincerity, especially when she herself didn't believe it.
"But that's because I'm still lacking as a counselor. And does that mean I dislike you, Miss Arachne? Or that I ran away?"
"...That's... not true, but.."
"Exactly. I don't know exactly what you heard or from whom, but I can guess. Still, I really like you, Miss Arachne."
Crack, crunch...!
"Your outward appearance may be inconvenient, but you have far too many wonderful qualities for me to avoid you because of it."
Tap-tap... crunch..
Her spider legs, which had been limp and sprawled, suddenly twitched all at once as if pricked by something sharp, then folded inward toward her body while scraping the floor. The sight and the chilling sound made my throat go dry and my voice falter for a moment, but I had to finish what I needed to say.
"Your cooking is truly delicious. I always think it's amazing how you can prepare dozens of dishes at once without a single mistake."
"...Cooking is something I've done as part of my duties for a long time, so of course I'm good at it.."
"On the outside you act tough...!"
"..Hic."
Twitch..!
"But inside, you're always worrying about others and showing consideration. Sometimes when you get flustered wondering if you spoke too harshly, I find it adorable."
Twitch.. twitch!
Tap, tap.
"S-such... adorable? That can't be.."
Everything was fine—really, everything was fine—but the sight of her legs twitching with embarrassment and confusion, along with the accompanying sounds, nearly made my voice break several times. ...But I held on.
If I had truly found her appearance disgusting or frightening, I would never have volunteered to assist in the kitchen in the first place.
"I can feel how grateful you are that I take the time to visit, and how you want to teach me one more thing or take care of me a little more. That's why coming here has never been unpleasant for me. I've always enjoyed it."
Cooking had always interested me, and her skill was so impressive that I found myself admiring it. Watching her work, I learned new recipes and even received snacks she had made herself. More than anything, with the Field Team Leader constantly hovering around me with that intense gaze lately, the Management Team Leader always looking for ways to tease me, and Yerin flashing her skirt colors whenever we met in the hallway even though quitting time was still far off, this place had become a welcome sanctuary—a sensible and beneficial space where I could rest my weary mind and body.
"It's not bragging, but among the people around me, there aren't many as wholesome and sincere as you, Miss Arachne, with whom I can have ordinary conversations without worry."
"...But... recently.."
She was right. I hadn't been able to drop by much lately. Had my absence contributed to the anxiety she was feeling?
"There have been a string of troublesome matters outside recently, and I've been busy dealing with the aftermath. It might sound like an excuse, but I never stayed away because I didn't want to see you, Miss Arachne."
"..."
..She had calmed down. She still wasn't looking at me, but her deeply bowed head had lifted slightly, and the hands covering her face were no longer gripping it tightly. I could sense she had many things she wanted to say and turn to tell me, but lingering fear and worry still held her back.
Now was the time to ask. She hadn't completely abandoned her expectations of me. That was why she had revealed her honest feelings in front of me like this.
"So... would you tell me? What exactly you heard, and how it made you so anxious."
After finishing my words, I connected my mind to hers with my ability before she could hesitate further. She probably wouldn't reject it. Though underhanded, it was the most reliable method right now.
"Ugh.."
A bloated sensation in my lower abdomen—something I had never felt since the mini Undine had taken residence in my body—rose up, and at the same time, the embarrassment and anxiety she was feeling flowed into me. The sensation of tangled threads clogging something inside was far more unpleasant and uncomfortable than I had expected. On top of that, the worry and stress that had caused it kept accumulating without resolution, so of course her condition wouldn't improve.
How had she managed to hide it so well in front of me, showing only a slight tension around her eyes? And how had she still prepared a delicious meal and even brewed coffee for me in that state...? Guilt welled up again, but I had connected our minds to see and hear the cause with my own eyes—and to properly feel her emotions.
Just like when I had glimpsed part of the memory of Dorothy being treated harshly by Scarlet. To unravel the knot in Arachne's heart, I first needed to accurately understand what had happened.
"This... feels really strange.."
"..Excuse me for a moment."
The view wavered. Arachne's back, which had been visible in front of me, blurred and faded into white. What replaced my vision was... an upside-down world? No—rather, I realized I was hanging from the ceiling.