Contact Me If You Need Eternal Life
Ding-a-ling.
A skeleton in a suit entered the store, the clattering of bones echoing as he did.
It was clearly an expensive three-piece suit.
In one hand, he carried a luxurious leather briefcase, and on the bridge of his nose—or rather, his bony ridge—perched glasses that gave off an intellectual vibe.
Considering the red glow emanating from his deeply sunken eye sockets...
A Lich? That guy's—or that skeleton's—a Lich?
I'd always imagined Liches wearing tattered robes and wielding massive staffs.
But this look.
A briefcase and a perfectly tailored suit?
I thought he was a lawyer or some office worker.
"Good work. I'm here to pick up a special delivery item that arrived today."
The Lich asked in a businesslike tone.
His voice was rough, like bones scraping together, but his speech was impeccably polite.
"Ah, you're here for the cursed necklace, right?"
"Correct."
"One moment."
I pulled out the box where a dark crimson aura was seeping out and placed it on the counter.
"This the one?"
"Yes, it is. It arrived faster than expected. I figured it'd take a few more days."
The Lich set down his briefcase and opened the box to inspect the necklace.
He pushed up his glasses with a careful gaze.
"I'll take a closer look for now. Need to judge if the curse efficiency is up to par. If it's defective, we'll have a mess on our hands."
"Take your time."
He sighed heavily as he examined each necklace.
"Haa, the paperwork I had to do just to up the quality on this one. The 58th-floor raid teams were going nuts for it, driving black market prices insane. Our research lab's budget is getting wrecked. And curse item prices are already skyrocketing..."
He let out a lament.
Each word he spoke filled the convenience store with a chilling air.
"Curses are trickier than they seem. There are curses that work on undead, and ones for living beings. Sorting all that out drags out the research period, but budgets are limited..."
Honestly, I had no clue what he was saying.
Still, nodding and smiling was part of the service, right?
"But I heard this thing slashes movement speed and defense like crazy. That okay?"
I tossed in a line I'd overheard from Lumina.
The Lich adjusted his glasses and shook his head at my question.
"No issue for undead like us. Stats do drop, but when you factor in opportunity cost, it's a net gain. That's why so many choose it. Especially on floors 58, 63, and 67—curse zones already saturated with debuffs. One more curse doesn't even register. Plus, it lets you dodge instant-death traps, so..."
The rest was a barrage of alien jargon.
I didn't understand a single word.
Regretting my past self for chiming in with that question—call it passion overload.
Sorry, sir. I don't get any of it.
Maybe he read my blank stare.
"Ahem, sorry. Anyway, it's an item worth the hype. And we're analyzing this curse to apply it to other items."
Analyzing curses to imbue them onto other gear.
Saw that plenty in RPGs.
Extracting traits from one item to enchant another.
"So, does the analyzed item become unusable? I think I've seen items vanish after analysis."
"Depends on the curse analyst's skill. Some can extract the same curse eight times or more from one item. Not me, though."
The Lich customer chuckled sheepishly, wrapping up his explanation.
"Excellent. This is the top-grade item we commissioned. I'll pay now. Lump sum, please."
I took his black card, processed the payment, and handed over the receipt.
"By the way, part-timer, you're awfully calm around undead. Most living folks get creeped out by our mana. Great service mindset."
"Eh, lots of all kinds of customers, so I'm used to it."
My answer made his jawbone clatter.
"Hahaha, is that so? Chatting curses with a living being was a fresh experience. Young folks these days are so negative about curses."
Did he mean young living people?
I couldn't quite say it.
Seemed like I was right, though.
Unaware of my thoughts, he pulled a business card from his suit pocket and handed it over.
Director, Archmage (AM) Belarus
"If you ever need to die, contact me. I can turn you undead anytime you want. Immortality's possible if a few conditions align."
"What are those conditions?"
"Well, working for our company for life, losing your sense of taste so no more food joy, and no need for sexual desire. Just those penalties for eternal life? Profitable deal."
Hmm.
Pass.
Couldn't refuse the card, though, so I took it from the Lich customer.
"Contact me if you need eternal life."
Director, huh?
No wonder the suit was so high-end.
"Oh, watch out for problem customers while you're on shift. Tower upper-floor projects are failing left and right, pushing hunters downward. They're stressed to the max, so brush it off if you can."
"Thanks for the advice. Safe travels."
Director Belarus adjusted his glasses with a nod and left the store.
Maybe it was that awkward time of day.
Not many customers.
Even after the Lich left, quite a while passed without any.
Out of habit, I logged into the Convenience Store Gallery.
The gallery was full of complaints about the surge in asshole hunters from failed upper-floor raids.
"Night shift must get a ton of hunter jerks."
Since I'm only day shift, it didn't hit home yet.
Day shift has its own jerks, sure.
Fewer than the boozed-up or dawn-mood night ones, though.
What to call 'em?
Kinda nice jerks?
Rushed salarymen on the way to work or lunch, desperate not to be late.
Telling me to hurry 'cause they're busy, that urgency.
People forget stuff when rushed, leading to comms glitches sometimes.
"3,400 won."
"Thanks!"
"Sir, you gotta pay!"
"Ah, sorry! In a rush. Keep the change, kid!"
Grabbing goods without paying, or ditching change entirely.
"Haa, why so slow? Hurry up and bag it?"
Venting the ass-chewing they got at work on the part-timer after hours?
Gotta ask the manager later.
About night shift jerks.
Scrolling down, a post title caught my eye.
I tilted my head reading the comments.
Zipped to the chin? Trash attitude?
Huh.
Doesn't match what I know.
Just now, Lumina in a crop top baring cleavage and navel, leaning in provocatively.
Even took off her helmet, showing her vulnerable side.
That cute act, puffing blue flames asking for a head pat 'cause she was tired—still burned into my retinas.
"Maybe 'cause she's tight with the manager."
You bond faster with a friend's friends.
Gallery makes it seem like she's only chill with me...
Don't overthink.
Users exaggerate, or maybe Lumina was just in a good mood today.
Still, good if coworkers like you.
I left a post.
Said day shift, and the welcomes poured in hot.
Hunter Tower.
Kuroaki Sonya stood before the tower, checking her gear.
"You're really going right in? Not even a week since last clear."
Her project guild manager said worriedly.
"Resting too long does no good. And I got the essential item for the raid, no reason to hesitate."
She gazed at the blue pollen dusting her hand.
World Tree Pollen from the convenience store part-timer at the tower base.
Essential for tackling curse-filled 73rd floor.
With this, she could catch the No.1 ranker grinding 80th—Hero's Record.
Maybe even surpass her clear time?
"Can't snag first clear, but I want the fastest clear title."
The guild manager bowed, unable to sway her stubbornness.
"Good luck."
Final gear check done, she stepped into the portal for the raid floor.
"Heading in."
Come to think, hadn't asked the part-timer's name.
After clear, bring a thank-you gift and repay.
Ask his name then too.
She clenched her fist tight.
And that day.
The 73rd-floor fastest clear record—held by one of the Seven Heroes—was broken.