(True) Goblin Head Smoothie

9:30 PM, Incheon's White Tower.

"Floor 2 is just trash mobs, right?"

I scanned the surroundings for any watchers, then got ready to head straight into the tower. Kitchen knife in one hand, black plastic bag in the other.

"Hmm, got everything I need, and the area's... yeah, clean."

I checked the stuff in my hands to make sure nothing was missing. Knife, bag, phone, crown—all good. The area around the tower was spotless, no guards in sight, dead quiet.

"Man, with the Association's security this lax, no wonder the heteromorphs and illegal Awakeners are running wild."

I gave my body a quick shake to loosen up and approached the tower. With every step closer, that mystical vibe hit me harder—still never got used to it. Keeping an eye out just in case, I slowly entered the tower.

I passed the familiar sights and pushed deep inside fast.

That weird sensation made me clench and unclench my fingers. Then the entry message popped up, and the scenery shifted again.

Whoosh—

An inexplicable warm light washed over me.

"Ugh... my eyes!"

The sudden brightness made me slap my hand over them. It'd been nighttime just seconds ago—this glare was like poison to me. I rubbed my eyes furiously, trying to adjust.

Finally, my vision cleared a bit. I started scanning the area to get my bearings, but the tower wasn't waiting around.

Kerruk—!

'!!!'

Shing—

"Fuck, you scared the shit outta me—!"

Something green-and-gray zipped right past me in a blur. The cry sounded like a goblin for sure, but... off.

'Goblins aren't that fast.'

This one was way quicker than your standard goblin. I whipped out my kitchen knife, tossed the bag on the ground, and whipped my head around looking for the mystery goblin.

Then the surroundings came into focus.

"What the hell are those..."

I stood in the middle of a sun-drenched grassland. All around, goblins riding wolf-like things had me surrounded.

"Damn, you popped up outta nowhere and gave me a heart attack. Whew."

I sized up the situation quick and stayed on guard. Not too many—about ten goblins, plus their mounts made maybe twenty total.

'Appraisal.'

I backed up to keep distance and fired off my Appraisal Eye on one of them.

'...'

Super straightforward. Basically just a speedy goblin. No skills, low level—easy pickings.

Kerruk—!

While I was appraising and getting the read on them, one rider spotted an opening and charged. Bike-speed fast. I glared it down hard.

Then I pulled the crown from my pocket, slapped it on, and pictured the thing bursting into flames as I activated the skill.

Kerruk?!

Whoosh—!

The goblin charging me got engulfed in flames from its own body the second I triggered it. I dialed it just enough to leave a body for smoothie-making.

But screw my control—it incinerated in seconds, no trace left.

"Uh..."

"Gotta dial this skill back way harder, huh?"

My mana stat was up, sure, but that gleaming King Slime Crown on my head? It was amping the power double.

I eyed the goblins hesitating over their flaming buddy. They flinched every time our eyes met. Momentum was mine already.

"Alright, customers, time to take turns becoming my smoothies."

Flash—

I lunged at the nearest goblin.

Kerruk?!

It tried to dodge my sudden move, but too slow.

Slice—!

Kerruk...

My knife sheared clean through the goblin's neck and its mount in one go. Thanks to my pumped strength stat, no snag, perfect cut. I could really feel the gains.

'One down.'

Kerruk—!

I flicked goblin blood off the blade. Eight Goblin Riders left. I squared up, staring down the ones glaring at me.

Could blast 'em all with a skill, but like before, might vaporize everything. Control was still iffy, so I'd have to chop necks one by one. Annoying, but whatever.

"Kinda a pain, but no choice."

After that, it was smooth. Most goblins were too terrified to fight back properly—just sliced 'em up. The few that shook it off and attacked? Torched their wolf mounts to neuter 'em.

With all goblins and wolves down, the familiar reward window popped.

"Oh, shop points as tower rewards?"

I checked the rewards, then pulled up the system window.

"It actually came through?"

Points from the tower? Total surprise—I figured it'd just be some mana stones and done. But points? Now I wondered ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠if stat points were possible too.

"Future's looking bright."

I closed the system and checked the tower rewards.

I hit Y without thinking. The scenery shifted, back to the original room.

Then another blue window.

Guess the tower had ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠some mercy—giving a breather. If it'd shoved me to Floor 3 right away, I'd have cursed it out loud.

I put the Floor 3 prompt on hold and got to what I came for.

"Phew—first things first..."

I pulled out the fresh goblin heads I'd prepped.

Why bring these? "You're all becoming my smoothies today. Happy now?"

To boost my agility stat. Saw in a post that goblins start on Floor 2—good call. Hauling ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠'em here sucked, though...

I dumped the black bag's contents on the floor. Portable blender, yogurt, ice—all packed tight, nothing missing. Some ice melted a bit, but still solid.

"Alright, goblin heads first..."

Grabbed the blender and a head from the pile.

Shoved the goblin head into the portable blender. Or tried to.

"Argh—these damn goblin heads are huge!"

Bigger than expected—wouldn't fit. Do they pump all nutrients to their brains or what? Dumb as rocks, but skulls like boulders.

"Agh..."

Sighed and decided to chop 'em up. Gross, but what ya gonna do?

I gathered the heads and started hacking away. Goblin blood and chunks got all over my hands—nasty as hell. But for agility? Suck it up, diced 'em one by one.

Volume shrank fast. Good enough.

Click—

Loaded the minced heads, ice, yogurt, sealed the lid.

Then.

Whirrwhirrwhirrwhirr—

Hit the button, and the blender roared to life, pulverizing the goblin head viciously.

"Urk—"

A foul stench rose as it shredded. How does it even smell like this? This wasn't cooking—it was straight alchemy.

Once fully blended.

Gulp.

A Goblin Head Smoothie (True) sat before me, even grosser-looking than the auto-cooked version.

"Seriously? Full stat boost, but back to the original nasty visuals...?"

Looked uneatably bad. The first auto one just looked chunky. Now? You could make out the pre-blend shapes. Getting stronger was such a grind.

But no backing out. For agility and tower rewards, I hoisted the blender and chugged.

Gulp. Gulp.

Same foul whiff as before, but taste wasn't bad. That lingering sweet aftertaste? Legit good.

Drained it all, no leftovers.

Got the expected reward. Now just do this eight more times.