Park Haeun (1)
“……Huh? Han Doyoon……?”
The moment my name left the fallen woman’s lips, I froze in panic and instinctively took a step back.
I should’ve worn a mask……!
Maybe it was the comfort of being home after so long, or Mom’s warm braised kimchi that had let my guard down. I’d momentarily forgotten the power of the Korean media. Already someone recognized my face. My heart, which had finally calmed, started pounding again.
But then—
Doyoon, you need to hold your head high. An innocent man doesn’t walk around with his head down.
Dad’s words from dinner came back to me. I steadied my breathing and stepped forward.
“H-here, let me help you up.”
I held out my hand. She hesitated for a moment before taking it.
When I pulled lightly, I was startled.
She was so light.
It felt like she floated up before I even put any strength into it.
Once she was on her feet, a small, delicate silhouette buried in a yellow hoodie far too big for her came into view. She looked like a little doll.
It was dark, and with the hood pulled low, I couldn’t make out her face clearly, but her gaze was sharp. Not once while she got up did her eyes leave my face.
“Han Doyoon…… You’re Han Doyoon the pitcher, right?”
“L-let’s clean this up first!”
The second she was standing, she tried to confirm my identity again, so I hurriedly changed the subject.
The ground was littered with plastic bags, cup ramen containers, drink cans—all sorts of recyclables mixed together. It looked like it would take a while.
“N-no, I’ll clean it up. More importantly……”
“No, no! Let’s do it together. Haha.”
Knowing it was rude to cut her off when she was probing my identity, I still snatched up a drink can from the floor in a rush.
She hesitated briefly, then crouched down after me and started picking up trash.
“Th-thank you……” she said quietly.
And so we began cleaning up the mess together.
But—
Stop staring at me already!
That prickling gaze kept landing on me whenever she got the chance. I wanted to ignore it, but it was impossible.
Unable to take the constant scrutiny any longer, I glanced at her. She picked up a cup ramen container and muttered under her breath.
“Maybe I’m still half-asleep……? It’s the middle of the season, though……”
When she started turning her head toward my face again, I kept my eyes on the ground and deliberately moved my hands faster.
Then came the next murmur.
“No…… It’s definitely Han Doyoon……”
Her muttering was crystal clear.
From the looks of it, she still wasn’t completely sure.
Right, just finish cleaning and deny it. What can she do then? Make me take off my hat?
Being confident was one thing; I didn’t need to volunteer, “Yes, I am Han Doyoon.”
I forced myself to ignore her muttering and worked even faster.
After what felt like forever of picking up trash and tossing it, the end finally came into sight.
How many energy drinks does this woman drink……?
I grabbed the last energy drink can and finished sorting the recyclables.
Just then—
“Doyoon, what are you doing that’s taking so long?”
It was Mom. The amount of trash hadn’t been that much, but it had taken so long she must have come out wondering if something was wrong.
“Ah, well……”
As I started to explain, that prickling gaze and muttering voice came from beside me again.
“Doyoon……?”
Ah.
I could feel the suspicious looks she’d been giving me transform into certainty right then and there.
She drew a short breath, then spoke without hesitation in a voice full of conviction.
“You’re Han Doyoon the pitcher……!”
At that, Mom looked at her with surprised eyes.
“You know my son……?”
She answered right away in a voice thick with excitement.
“Yes! Of course I do! I know him so well!”
With the yellow hood still pulled up, her excited figure looked just like a little peeping chick.
Mom seemed momentarily flustered, but she quickly lifted the corners of her mouth and asked carefully.
“Oh my, then are you perhaps a fan……?”
At that, the fluttering movements she’d been making until a moment ago stopped dead.
“Ah……”
A brief silence. She seemed lost in thought for a moment. Then at last, a shy answer left her lips.
“Yes, that’s right. I think so. A fan.”
It was already late evening by the time Park Haeun pushed herself up from the bed.
“Hwaaaaaaam.”
Whether it was the aftermath of last night’s fierce keyboard battle or not, dark circles hung heavy under Park Haeun’s eyes.
Moving like a zombie, she climbed out of bed and headed for the bathroom.
But then,
— Clink.
“Ah.”
One of the cans she’d eaten from last night and tossed carelessly caught her foot.
It had already been a month since she’d moved here.
In all that time, she had never once done the recycling.
And the result was right in front of her eyes.
It wasn’t just the one can that had just tripped her rolling around the room.
Cup ramen containers with dried noodles stuck hard to the sides, snack bags left half-eaten and tossed anywhere, delivery food containers emptied of their contents and stacked like towers.
The space she lived in was a complete disaster zone.
People who knew her would never even be able to imagine her like this.
Outside,
“Unnie, your room must be so pretty.”
“Right… When you walk in, doesn’t it smell like flowers?”
“No matter what you do, you’re like a fairy.”
She heard things like that, but the scent filling this room right now was absolutely nothing like flowers.
The smell of cup ramen seasoning, the smell of cold, congealed delivery food sauce—all tangled together into some unidentifiable air that filled the space.
Haeun let out a long sigh.
“……Fairy, my foot.”
She carefully nudged one of the delivery containers on the floor aside with her toe and muttered.
“……I really have to clean today.”
She’d said that every Saturday since moving here, but she’d never once actually followed through. Today, though, even she couldn’t stand it anymore—the trash had piled up too high.
Park Haeun began gathering the trash bit by bit and stuffing it into a large box.
Two cup ramen containers, three, five……
She gave up counting them herself.
Snack bags, delivery containers, empty cans—she swept everything she could reach into the box until it was swollen to the point of bursting.
Having finally managed to get all the trash in the room into the box, she pulled a yellow hoodie from the closet. She threw it on over her pajamas and pulled the hood deep over her greasy hair to hide it.
Then, hugging the box that had swollen to the size of her own body, she grunted her way out the front door.
Her mind was still hazy. Her eyelids were half-closed, her steps unsteady.
She was moving on pure instinct, driven by the single thought of I have to throw this away…
And then it happened.
“Aargh, that bastard Kim Yeongseon!”
A man’s shout slammed straight into Haeun’s eardrums. The sound blew the haze right out of her head.
“Kyaak?!”
Startled, Haeun’s body jerked backward.
Her feet tangled, she lost her grip on the box, and she toppled straight back onto her butt.
The impact sent the box flying forward, and cup ramen containers, snack bags, and cans scattered wildly across the floor. Haeun sat there on the ground in a daze.
“Ow……”
She reached back to gently rub the sharp pain rising from her rear.
That was when it happened.
The sound of someone running urgently approached. And those footsteps stopped right in front of Park Haeun.
“A-are you okay? I suddenly yelled like that……!”
Haeun flinched and curled her body slightly.
“N-no…… I’m fine……”
Long hair covered her face, blurring her vision, and she could barely tell what was going on. She brushed the fallen hair aside and carefully lifted her head.
And the face she met.
“……Huh? Han Doyoon……?”
As Park Haeun picked up the scattered trash one by one and put it away, she sank deep into her own thoughts.
The way he’d deflected her questions had clearly felt like he was deliberately avoiding answering. So she hadn’t pressed further, but no matter how hard she searched her memory, there was only one conclusion.
It’s definitely… Han Doyoon the pitcher, I think……
Because of last night’s frenzied keyboard war, she’d stared at his articles, broadcast captures, and interview photos dozens of times. That face, those eyes, that aura—they were all still vivid in her mind.
But one thing bothered her.
But… Han Doyoon should definitely be in the middle of the season……
At that thought, Haeun’s hands paused. The strength drained from her fingertips holding the cup ramen container.
No matter how I think about it… there’s no reason for him to be here. He should be at the team dorm……
As she piled up her own doubts and her heart gradually leaned toward “maybe not…?”, that was when—
A woman’s voice came from not far away.
“Doyoon, what are you doing that’s taking so long?”
Haeun’s body froze for an instant.
“…Doyoon…?”
She slowly raised her head. And she saw a woman walking toward the man she suspected was Han Doyoon from the entrance of the recycling area.
Haeun’s eyes went wide.
In that moment, every doubt and possibility in her head fused into one.
“You’re Han Doyoon the pitcher……!”
Just as Haeun had expected, the man was indeed Han Doyoon. The same Han Doyoon whose pitches had captivated her last night and driven her to stay up all night fighting keyboard battles.
When that Han Doyoon appeared right before her eyes, Haeun couldn’t hide her joy.
But then,
“Oh my, then are you perhaps a fan……?”
The moment those words reached her, Haeun’s movements stopped.
“Ah……”
Haeun fell into thought.
Is this… being a fan? I just liked his pitches and only looked at the data…… I wasn’t even interested in Han Doyoon the person……
But soon, the emotions from yesterday’s dawn came flooding back.
The version of herself whose hands had moved first in anger when he was being cursed as a doper. The version of herself who’d stayed up all night fighting in the comments looking for evidence. The version of herself who’d tried so hard to prove why he used that form, why that velocity came out.
And even the quiet support that had grown as she learned his story.
……That’s right. I wasn’t just looking at the pitches. I did it because I wanted to protect this person.
Haeun very slowly raised her head. And with a slightly embarrassed face, but in a clear voice, she said,
“Yes… that’s right. I think so. A fan.”