Chapter 159: Clown Union Club 6
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 159: Clown Union Club 6
Usually, when you are born a noble, mastering either swordsmanship or magic is considered a mandatory rite of passage from a young age.
If you possess exceptional talent, you’ve hit the jackpot. Even if you don’t, being able to protect yourself to some extent is never a bad thing.
But what if a child shows an affinity for spirits?
That is the day the family throws a massive feast.
While having an affinity doesn't automatically make one an exceptional spiritist, it isn't a talent you can simply acquire through effort. Thus, possessing it alone draws immense expectations from everyone around.
Beyond swordsmanship, magic, and spirits, nobles also learn various other skills from childhood depending on their family's specialty—be it the bow, the dagger, or the axe.
However, no family ever teaches a young child sorcery.
Sorcery refers to the power of manifesting supernatural phenomena through rituals, sacrifices, or incantations.
But in the online communities I frequented before my reincarnation, sorcery was described differently.
Gacha.
One might think, 'Since it involves incantations, isn't it the same as a mage chanting a spell?' But sorcery and magic are worlds apart.
To use a simple analogy, magic is like 5 + 5 = 10.
The result comes out exactly as calculated.
Then what about sorcery?
With sorcery, 5 + 5 could result in 2, or it could result in 20. If you're really unlucky, you might get a completely nonsensical answer like, "The strawberries are running."
In magic, if a spell fails, it simply doesn't activate. There is no significant risk.
But sorcery?
The risks are just as random as the results.
Incantations have relatively few variables, but rituals are the most dangerous.
If a ritual fails and you walk away with only a single scar on your face, people will say, "Wow, this guy is incredibly lucky."
You could go blind, lose a limb, or even grow an extra ear.
There are cases where someone performed a ritual in reverse and still succeeded, but there are also cases where a single stray hair falling into the ritual site caused the sorcerer's head to explode.
Because it is so volatile, no one ever teaches sorcery to children.
As time passed, the number of people learning the craft dwindled, and the population of sorcerers began to shrink.
To begin with, this was how the public viewed sorcerers:
Crazy bastards gambling with their own lives.
Just as sorcerers were about to become an endangered species, a rumor began to circulate among them.
Someone had created a spell that could predict the outcome of a ritual.
Naturally, no one believed it at first.
'Did you hear?'
'You mean that new Safety Confirmation Spell? You actually believe that crap?'
'But if it's real, we wouldn't have to write a will every time we perform a ritual, right?'
'Wait a minute. If we use that, we won't be able to feel that thrilling rush of putting our lives on the line.'
'......'
'......'
'Why are you looking at me like that?! Didn't you guys become sorcerers for that thrill, too?'
'I'm a sorcerer myself, but looking at this guy, I finally understand why people think we're weirdos.'
'Agreed.'
That spell was the real deal.
After its creation, the accident rate from rituals plummeted by over 90%.
What about the other 10%?
Those were the people who said, "Hmph! My ritual isn't wrong! That spell is what's weird," and then went full-throttle with the ritual anyway.
When it became known that the Safety Confirmation Spell was legitimate, the world was shocked. And when they discovered the identity of the person who created it, they were even more stunned.
The sorcerer who created the Safety Confirmation Spell was Frederick Nicholas.
He had created it just one week after he started teaching himself sorcery.
Naturally, from then on, sorcerers made sure to use the Safety Confirmation Spell before any ritual.
By using it, sorcerers could know in advance what would happen if a ritual failed, and as a result...
A bizarre culture began to emerge.
'Oh, shit, that was a close one. If I'd gone through with the ritual, my hair and my hands would've swapped places for the rest of my life.'
'Ahhh! It's him again! We must worship him once more!'
'Frederick Punch! Frederick Punch! Frederick Punch! Frederick Punch!'
'The sun used to rise in the West, but when the Great Frederick woke up one morning and said it was too bright, it started rising in the East from the next day onward!'
'Did sorcery come first? Or did the Great Frederick create sorcery first?!'
It was the infinite worship of Frederick, the creator of the Safety Confirmation Spell.
* * *
So, you're telling me all forty people in front of me are members of the Sorcery Club and are all Frederick worshippers?
"Now! Do you see it too? The greatness of Lord Frederick!"
My sin was asking, 'But why are you getting Mr. Frederick's autograph?' For that, I had been caught and forced to listen to why I should worship Frederick for the past forty minutes.
I understood why they wanted his autograph, but one question still remained.
"But then, why did you bring Mr. Frederick here with his arms locked so he couldn't run away?"
The two burly men holding Frederick's arms raised their voices in protest at my words.
"Run away?! What nonsense is that?!"
"If it wasn't to stop him from running, then why are you holding his arms like that?"
"That's obviously to protect the Great Frederick—the supreme genius who defies even the gods—from the foolish ones who would attack him out of jealousy!"
What kind of bullshit is this?
I wondered if I was the only one who didn't understand, but looking around, the other Sorcery Club members were nodding vigorously in agreement.
I turned my head to look at the supreme genius who defies even the gods, the Great Frederick.
Frederick's skin was already as red as a tomato, if not redder.
To think you could actually kill someone with embarrassment.
I learned one fact from these people that I hadn't known before.
"So, the entity jealous of the supreme genius Great Frederick and trying to attack him is... God?"
"You... you actually get it, don't you?"
Finding the Sorcery Club members quite to my liking, I engaged in more conversation with them.
It definitely wasn't because I enjoyed watching Frederick's face turn redder the longer the conversation lasted.
Through my talk with them, I managed to gather a few pieces of information.
First, Frederick's talent was even more incredible than I had thought.
Most of the people here were only alive and in one piece today thanks to the spells Frederick had created.
The person currently crying while shaking Frederick's hand would have been cursed to fart every time he took a step if not for Frederick's spell.
The person over there sealing his hand in plastic because it shouldn't be defiled after shaking Frederick's hand would have been cursed to add "Ekyung!" to the end of every sentence.
Those two were on the cuter side; others said they had nearly lost limbs.
"Then, Senior, what kind of curse were you almost hit with?"
I asked the President of the Sorcery Club.
This man seemed to be the most devout Frederick worshipper of them all.
If the others were about 40% joking, this guy seemed 90% sincere.
The Sorcery Club President leaned in and whispered in my ear.
I immediately understood why he cared for and worshipped Frederick so much.
"Whoa!"
Respect!
Frederick had saved a family line from being extinguished.
* * *
Only after Frederick had signed autographs and shaken hands with every single member of the Sorcery Club were we finally able to leave the alley.
The second piece of information I gathered while talking to them:
They had invited Frederick to join the Sorcery Club, but he had refused.
And once he refused, they never brought up the topic of the club again.
"But why did you turn down the Sorcery Club? Looking at them, it seems like life would be very comfortable if you joined. Oh! Wait, did you refuse because you wanted to join my Clown Union Club?"
"N-No. That's definitely not it. The Sorcery Club is j-just... too overwhelming."
"Well, that makes sense."
If the Disciplinary Committee is the Johanna Fan Club, then the Sorcery Club is, in my eyes, the Frederick Fan Club.
Even a normal person would find that kind of worship burdensome; for Frederick, club time would probably feel like a live roasting session.
"But Mr. Frederick? If you're not joining the Sorcery Club, which club are you planning to join?"
During the club experience period, Frederick had joined the Hand-to-Hand Combat Club due to the 'encouragement' of Kuran and Ren.
Of course, thanks to that, he had learned to use his curses more effectively, but there wasn't much more he could gain from going there.
"Are you planning to join the Hand-to-Hand Combat Club?"
"Hieek! I hate that place."
Frederick massaged his own shoulders as if they ached just from the thought.
"In all seriousness, wouldn't the club I'm making be the most comfortable? If all the Special Class students join, it'll be less overwhelming since you'll only be around people you know."
"I-I also think the place y-you're making is the b-best option, but..."
"Then why don't you just join?"
"B-But that place! I feel like it'll g-get a lot of attention. No, it'll definitely stand out! I mean, e-e-everyone except me is talented and confident."
"I'll deny that last part, but I can't deny that we'll get a lot of attention."
"A-And, I don't really like the name either."
"I'll have to deny that part."
Even if he is the supreme genius Frederick who defies the gods, I won't stand for him insulting my club's name.
Since lunch break was almost over and we both had to head to our respective classes, I asked one last thing I was curious about.
"Mr. Frederick, are the other sorcerers in the first year similar to those people?"
"Yes..."
So that's why he's been going all the way down to the Special Class in the basement during every break in the afternoon classes.
"Hmm. But isn't it okay during class since the professor is there?"
"The p-professor is the worst of them all."
"Ah..."