The Power in Words (1)

"Come now, let us try it once more."

The sun was sinking low as Menassil stood the spoon upright on the table yet again, fixing me with eyes bright with expectation. Elaine and Erzena, who had knocked off a little early alongside me, hid behind the sofa with only the tops of their heads peeking out to watch us.

"Try bending this."

"..."

Instead of answering, I trained every ounce of my focus on Menassil and the spoon. That familiar feeling — a tickle deep in my throat. I opened my mouth, slowly.

An utterly alien pronunciation that felt nothing like a human voice. Words in a weighty tongue I had never once heard in my life rolled out of me. Every eye in the room turned to the spoon.

— ...

Silence. Stillness. The spoon stood bolt upright, without so much as a tremor. Menassil's eyes met mine.

"Your pronunciation and breath are perfect... once more."

This time I changed the incantation — and, just in case, stretched out my right hand as well.

— ...

But once again, only stillness hung in the air. Then—

— swish, tap.

Rather than bending, the spoon suddenly keeled over sideways. At the sight, Menassil burst into applause, her eyes going round.

"...!! Ooh — progress at last! Behold, you have done it!"

"No. That is not what happened."

I let out a long sigh instead and looked at the princess hiding beyond the sofa.

"Elaine. No secret psychokinesis, please."

Elaine slyly tucked her hands behind her back. At ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠last, my patience spent, I rose from my seat.

"Shall we stop here for today? It doesn't look like we're making any progress at all."

"Can you still not feel it? That crackling — FWOOOSH, then PABABABA-BAM! — that tingling surge that rises up from your very heart, winds through your whole body, and bursts out through your mouth?"

"...No."

What in the world was "fwoooosh-pabababam" supposed to be? I had figured out, rather late, that Menassil had no aptitude whatsoever for teaching. Which was fair enough — a dragon born bearing immense power awakens it all by instinct. There is no law that a master of an art must be a master teacher.

'And me... I couldn't get even the faintest grip on it.' I shook my head.

"Damn it. This isn't working."

"Central Officer?"

"It has been two whole weeks already. I've tried more than enough for anyone."

Fourteen days. Quite a stretch of time had passed since I'd agreed to learn the Dragon Word. And in all of it, without missing a single day, I had finished my duties and sat down with Menassil just like this, commanding that goddamn spoon to bend, to fall over, hundreds upon hundreds of times. All the while believing that at last, even I had a power to call my own.

"If there's been no progress even after all this, then I suppose the Dragon Word simply isn't possible for me."

"Dear, dear. Someone must be extra tired today, Central Officer."

Coiling her tail gently around my arm as though to soothe me, Menassil steered me back into my chair and continued.

"The Dragon Word is no mere speech. What you have spoken until now is only the language of dragons — far too shallow to be called the Dragon Word."

"What difference does that make? Isn't it the same meaning, in the end?"

"Entirely different. The Dragon Word is language and power at once — phenomenon and declaration. One speaks what must come to pass — no; one speaks what has already come to pass."

I looked up at her, my expression a tangle.

"To speak it, you must stake your all. Breathe a desperate, desperate will into the words."

"So you are telling this officer to pour his whole soul into bending a spoon. As though that were my sworn destiny."

"...It does sound rather strange when you put it that way. But aye — that is so."

No, seriously — since when does bending a spoon demand everything you have? Of course, in the beginning I'd been sure it would work, and I had thrown my full weight into it. Honestly, I'd been excited, too. Power made real through language — I'd been over the moon, thinking I'd finally gained an ability of my own. But now, two weeks on, with nothing gained and nothing changed, those words weren't helping in the slightest.

Come to think of it — doesn't will swell in proportion to a person's desperation and conviction? The question surfaced, and I tossed it straight to Menassil.

"Wouldn't the will have to be something far grander than this? Like when you brought down a volcano to guard your egg, ma'am?"

At that, Menassil arched a brow and answered with unbending firmness.

"Careless talk. You know full well, do you not — there is nothing free in this world."

"I know it well."

"The same holds here. It is a power that warps the laws of the world — the stronger it burns, the fiercer the recoil."

She laid a hand against her own chest.

"Even dragons do not wield the Dragon Word lightly. It is burden enough with the mana gushing from our hearts — we dare not use it carelessly. And for a human such as you, the weight would be far greater still. One must begin with the smallest of things."

"So you're telling this officer to attempt precisely that."

"I have never taught this to anyone, so it feels a little awkward. But there is surely a way. Your 'Universal Linguistics' did not come to you for nothing."

She hesitated a moment, searching for the right words, then said with a faint smile.

"For there is no such thing as coincidence."

"...That may well be. But it's getting a little heavy now."

I was wearing thin. Will, power — explaining things that were nothing but abstraction was far too hard. 'For a mana-incompatible man like me, this kind of power never fit right in the first place.' How was I supposed to wield something I could neither see nor feel?

I turned Menassil's words over once more.

"Pour my will into it... huh."

"How would it be, to speak aloud the thing you desire most?"

"Pardon?"

"In the end, every sentient being harbors desire and dream. Those two are the greatest engines of a life. Yet will settles not into desire — it settles into dream."

What did I desire? The answer came at once.

"A week of leave, a performance bonus, and your visit to the Royal Castle, ma'am."

"You still have that on your mind? What a tenacious little menace you are."

Menassil's brows snapped together, and she smacked the floor with her tail.

"Dreams spring from the past. Speak, then, the longing born of your most vivid memories. Though speak nothing too great — your body would not endure it."

At that, Erzena fell deep into thought, then murmured.

"Now that I think of it... Nathan, dear, you've hardly ever told us anything about yourself. Not even why you became an immigration officer."

For a moment, I kept silent. What I desired. Why had I become an immigration officer?

— "Do you have a dream?"

Suddenly, a question from long ago surfaced — the one Hailin had thrown at me the first time we ever met.

— "Nathan Kell. What is your dream?"

'I wanted to see the world.' As a trader's son — as the one fated to succeed my father at the head of the guild.

Greed. Sorrow. Pleasure. Joy. Rage. Pain. Hope. Emptiness — countless emotions sealed inside the words and wares that passed back and forth, inside the gold coins and the weapons. I saw them all.

"This officer..."

Slowly, I opened my mouth. Simply seeing the world could no longer be where it ended. One step further.

'I wanted to become someone who would stand upon that line drawn without mercy across the earth — the border — and reach out a hand.'

— "What is your dream?"

So I became an immigration officer. And then, one step further still.

People bent and broken. People collapsed and fleeing. People who wanted a new life, who longed to begin again — I remember the laughter of those who cross the border.

'I had watched it all — every joy and every sorrow.'

How beautiful it is, when one world meets another. As the officer who willingly treads that merciless line across the earth, the first to meet the people beyond it — what is it that I desire now?

'I...'

— "Speak nothing too great. Your body would not endure it."

Menassil's warning flashed through my mind. 'Right. To wish to change the world — that is greed.' A dream that can never come true is mere desire. But a wish spoken for the women standing before me now — that much would be all right.

"These past days have been hard on you all, and hard days will come again... but even so, in this one place—"

In this country, at least. In my home, at least. If only for this one moment, here with me.

Slowly, sunlight broke in from behind me.

"May you all..."

In that instant, an alien sensation shot up my spine. Ah. So this was it. Now I understood what Menassil had been trying to tell me.

That fwoooosh-and-pabababam power. Something warm, rising from the very depths of my heart. I gathered it in — and for the first time, showed them my true heart.

My voice gave out two languages at once. The speech of humankind — and the speech of dragons.

"..."

"..."

"..."

All three women stared at me, faces frozen in shock. But nothing happened. There was only stillness, four gazes tangled together in the quiet. And then, some fifteen seconds later—

"...I'll, ah, just go get some water."

Erzena and Elaine murmured as though bewitched by something, then abruptly rose from their seats.

"Wh-where are you two going?"

"..."

"..."

Without so much as an answer, the two women vanished up to the second floor. Only Menassil clapped, slow and full of admiration.

"Central Officer. Truly, you are... a natural."

"Pardon?"

"Why not simply go and court them outright?"

"You're the one who told me to state my wish!"

I'd said it because I was told to — why were they reacting like that? But Menassil, watching me bark, lifted one eyebrow and asked in return.

"Oh ho. So what ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠you mean is, you truly wished for the happiness of the three of us?"

"..."

Wow. Looking back on it, this was mortifying. Saying "may you be happy, at least here" to the women I live with.

"Ugh...!"

In an instant, my face flooded red. But the water was already spilled. I couldn't take it back — didn't want to, either. Because it had been truly, completely sincere.

I pushed out my lips and muttered.

"...And what's wrong with that?"

"Nothing at all. It was a most excellent wish. I nearly fell for you myself."

Menassil giggled as though she might die of amusement, then tilted her head to one side.

"And yet — how strange."

"What is it."

"That just now felt truly like the Dragon Word. I felt it, unmistakably. Fwoooosh, pabababam."

She tapped her own chest.

"Then why did nothing come to pass? And why was there no backlash upon you?"

"Who knows. I suppose it means this officer simply can't use the Dragon Word, after all."

That did it. I was done. Completely spent, I waved a hand.

"Let's really and truly end it here for today. I'm exhausted."

And my sanity wouldn't hold out much longer, either.

If Noah had heard this, he'd have gone absolutely ballistic.

— "You crazy philandering bastard! Why don't you just propose while you're at it!?"

Just imagining it gave me chills. Thank everything that he'd left for the West when he did.

"I'll see you tomorrow, ma'am."

At my back as I headed up to my ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠room, Menassil called out brightly.

"Let us try again tomorrow!"

"Oh, hell no!"

I wasn't doing it anymore.

— Bang.

Elaine flung open the bathroom door in a rush and began running water into the sink.

— Shhhhhhh—

Eyes on the slowly rising water, she took a long, deep breath.

"Whewwww... haaaaa..."

But even so, there was one thing that refused to calm down.

— Ba-dump, ba-dump.

Her heart, hammering like it had lost its mind. When she lifted her head to the mirror, a face stained redder than the fading sunset outside looked back at her. Without realizing it, she clutched at her chest.

'What... is this?'

An emotion she had never once felt before.

Nathan had said it in the common tongue — and, in the very same breath, in a language she could not understand. But the moment she heard it, something nameless and overwhelming had surged up to the base of ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠her throat.

"Mnnn...?"

Head cocked, the rims of her eyes red. What on earth could this be? Why did her heart pound harder than it ever had each time she thought of Nathan? Why did she want to cry, when she wasn't even sad? Elaine hurled the questions at her reflection, again and again, searching for an answer that could not be found.

And at that very same moment, in the room right next door, Erzena—

~~~~~~~~~~!!!!!

—was face-down in a pillow, letting loose a soundless scream like a woman possessed.

"He's insane, he's insane, he's insane, he's INSANE!!!"

Words that amounted to a confession. The subject had gone unsaid — but she had felt it, plain as day.

'He meant it. He said it with everything he had!'

Nathan had been smiling, softly and without armor, when he said it. Not his usual tired, even-keeled expression — a smile with all his guard let down. It was a face she had seen only twice in all this time: the day she first promised to give up her office as Saint for Nathan's sake, and the night she sang to him as he slept, worn hollow by overwork.

'It was an expression I could only ever see when I did something for him.'

A smile plain and unguarded — and one that made a corner of her chest ache. This time, it was Nathan who had spoken a wish for her, and worn that very expression.

He had meant it. Among the countless wishes and longings he might have chosen, Nathan had spoken a wish for them. As though it were the one that mattered most of all.

Erzena hastily clasped her hands together and sank to her knees, offering up a prayer with all the strength she had.

"I—I, too, pray that you'll be h-happy... hahappy, together with..."

But before she could see the sentence through—

~~~~~~!!!!!!

—shame won out, and Erzena buried her face in the pillow once more. Divine power erupted from her more furiously than it ever had, filling the room until it was all but a golden fog.

But the two of them knew one thing with absolute certainty: they were already living calmer, more carefree, happier days than they had ever known. Dragon Word or no Dragon Word, that much was the plain, unshakable truth.

"As happy as we are now... I pray that you will be, too."

Erzena murmured the words, her voice barely managing to crawl out of the pillow.

And the next day—

Elaine and Erzena were late.