The Housewarming Gift
There is only one reason to conquer the Flauros Dungeon. If there is an existence like me, climbing up from the bottom one step at a time, I needed to ensure the battlefield wasn't my own base. Much like the relationship between Las Village and Las Vegas, I needed a levee to protect my dungeon.
"Hmm, smells good. A perfect place to stir up some absolute chaos."
The scent of animals is thick here. The pungent odor of cats is so strong that I feel dizzy the moment I step inside. That goes for Ryun, who is stuck to my side, as well.
"Ryun. Do you hear anything?"
"...No. Nothing. It seems... it's blocked."
"What?"
"The sound is bouncing back. It's echoing. The airflow is obstructed. The passage itself... it seems to be sealed."
"Wait here for a second."
To verify if Ryun was right, I sprinted down the passage. Just like when Luna had snuck in before, I shouted at the top of my lungs, letting my voice fill the entire tunnel.
"Uwaaaaaah!! Ryun tastes like peaches!!!"
"Master!!"
I could hear Ryun shrieking from far away. Even that sound, along with my own roar, flew rapidly to strike the cave walls and returned as an echo. After running at full speed for about a minute, I found that the end of the passage was indeed blocked.
"Hmm..."
The shape of the wall was quite strange, as if it had been blocked off recently. It looked like the cave wall had been hastily patched up overnight. I pressed myself against the wall and tilted my head to listen. Scrape, scrape. From beyond the thick wall, I could hear the sound of claws scratching at the dirt.
Only then did I realize why the portal had opened into a blocked path. Flauros had temporarily sealed the tunnel. This was just a partition wall; if I dug out the dirt or collapsed it with force, the path to the heart of the dungeon would open up.
"Master. There are enemies inside."
"Yeah. The thickness is... 30cm? Something like that. I can hear the soldiers gathering inside from here."
Tap, tap, tap. I knocked on the wall. I could hear the enemy soldiers waiting on the other side tensing up. The sound of swallowing, the nervous growling, the sharpening of razor-sharp claws—it all carried through.
'Was the appearance of the Robotang a foreshadowing for this?'
If Solomon was using his summoning to predict my future, perhaps he was an existence capable of foresight. Of course, that was likely just my own delusional rambling, but it was too chilling and amusing a situation to be a mere coincidence.
"Ryun. What do you think the enemy troops are like?"
"Hmm... things with sharp claws, like Andras or werewolves?"
"Exactly. Whether they are bipedal or quadrupedal, they'll be monsters that use claws as their main weapon. It could be a place overflowing with real werewolves, or perhaps weretigers. But Ryun."
I clenched my fist, and Ryun pulled out her bow and drew the string.
"Does that mean we lose?"
"No?"
"We came here to win, and we are going to thoroughly wreck this dungeon. That's right. We're going to beat the hell out of everyone inside."
I always dealt out thorough retribution to those who came to attack me, but I offered the utmost courtesy to those I struck first. Since I was the "bad guy" from their perspective, I felt a little bad about acting like a total lunatic. 'And because I'm a dungeon master, too.'
Flauros was also a dungeon master, an existence that could become a member of my legion. Therefore, I needed to treat her with a certain gentlemanly grace. I knocked on the wall once more.
"Is anyone home——!!"
I hoped my voice would reach inside. My booming voice must have surely carried beyond the partition. "I've brought a housewarming gift!! Won't you open the door?!"
I shouted at the top of my lungs, but there was no response. I poked my fingers into the wall.
"Heh, my skill at digging through cave walls with my fingers is top-notch."
"Master...."
Ryun looked at me with pity, but I know better. I know that Ryun gulps down her saliva when she sees me working my fingers against the wall.
"Ryun. Are you ready?"
"Yes."
I created a groove of appropriate depth, and Ryun aimed her wind arrow precisely at it. Ryun’s archery, which was better than anyone else's at making holes in straw or human heads, had already been sufficiently proven, and she was already pulling her weight as a 3-star unit.
"Then...!"
Whoosh! The wind arrow left the string and pierced the cave wall. As soon as the light from inside leaked into our passage, Ryun dodged to the side.
Whoosh! A massive burst of flame erupted from the hole, which was about the size of a 500-won coin. It was a bit hot, but not as scorching as during the Gremory battle.
"The welcome is quite hot, landlord!"
Roar!! The flames grew even more intense. Seeing the entire wall get slightly hot, it seemed they were breathing fire hard on the other side, but the flames couldn't even cross half of the small hole Ryun had finished piercing.
"Do you not want to receive your housewarming gift!!"
Shut up and die!! A sharp, shrill voice came from inside. My mouth watered involuntarily.
"That's a woman's voice, right?"
"Master...."
"Ryun, that was definitely a woman's voice just now. I'm sure of it."
"How long has it been since you did this with me in the sub-dungeon?"
Ryun pouted and grumbled. I stamped my thumb onto her lips.
"I'll do it once here, and then once more in secret. How's that?"
"If it's that, then I welcome it anytime. Hehehe."
It was fortunate that Ryun was so understanding. While Ryun and I whispered about what position we should try this time, the flames died down. I shouted toward the inside once more.
"Excuse me, but are you currently on fire?!"
Shut up! Shut up and just stay there for three days until you burn out!
"Looks like they're properly terrified? Doesn't seem like they're planning a counterattack."
"...The voice sounds a bit hoarse, doesn't it?"
Now that Ryun mentioned it, it did seem that way. The growling wasn't just a threat; it sounded like they were forcing out a hoarse voice as if their vocal cords had been injured. Of course, even that voice was appetizing.
"A demon with claws that uses fire. Could it be something like a Salamander?"
"What's that?"
"Ah, it's a lizard that breathes fire. I'm not sure if they exist in this world, though. Ryun, what do you think?"
"...Well. Maybe a Griffin? A monster that breathes fire from its mouth."
"That would be nice. Either way, I can't confirm it without seeing it with my own eyes, so step back a little. I need to greet the landlord."
Ryun quickly moved away from the wall, and I also put some distance between us. Already, a wide tunnel dug by Lime was positioned behind us.
"Ryun, do you know why popular restaurants have so many regulars?"
I scooped Ryun up and jumped into the hole.
"It's because you don't get tired of it even after eating it once."
Tactics are the same. Can a mere 64th-ranker block a tactic that even Gremory fell for?
'If they block it, I'll admit they're smarter than Gremory.'
And if they can't? 'They get eaten, just like Gremory.'
"Master, you're already thinking about eating Flauros, aren't you?"
"......I came to a restaurant to eat, not to take pictures!"
At my words, Ryun nodded vigorously. A trick that worked once might not work on the same opponent, but the enemy right now wasn't Gremory.
"Master, but what if this gets blocked?"
"If it gets blocked, we just have to break through."
But it wouldn't be blocked. During the last Gremory dungeon raid, it took time because I was being very careful to grasp the internal structure of the enemy dungeon, but the purpose of digging the tunnel this time was different.
Kagagagak!! The five Slime Dragons rolled into a cylinder in a pentagram-like formation. The Slime Dragons, digging into the ground like drills, bored the tunnel at a perfect angle and size under Lime's guidance.
"Going in!"
I gently set Ryun down and ran forward. As soon as Lime heard my voice, she changed the direction of the Slime Dragons. Upward.
Kagagagagak! The moment the Slime Dragons, which had been going straight, angled their heads vertically to climb, I also leaped far toward the bend as if performing a high jump. Right above my head, a Slime Dragon was poking its head halfway out of the ground.
"W-what the?!"
A sharp, surprised voice struck my ears. At the same time, the Slime Dragons clung to the wall, creating space. Lime had already finished preparing to lift me up by forming her body like a support.
Splosh. I stepped on Lime with my jumping foot. Lime bounced me up with all her might, and I soared vertically as if I had stepped on a springboard. And just before exiting the cave, I grabbed the collars of the strongest dragons, No. 1 and No. 2, and flew up.
"Ascending, Dragon, Fist!!"
No flames came out, but instead, the Slime Dragons sprayed slime in all directions. In the clearing meant for interception, a leopard-like beastkin with a head blazing in flames was baring its teeth at us.
Kyaaaaak!!
"What the. Your head is on fire? But you're not bald? That's sweet."
I gripped the Slime Dragons in both hands tightly. The Slime Dragons clung to my hands like gauntlets. Kyaaaaak, Kiaaaaak!! The burning leopard beastkin hissed at me. Except for the flames on their heads, they were typical beastkin with animal ears and tails. All ten or so beastkin in the room had their heads on fire, and for some reason, they were all covered in small wounds.
"Heh, you guys didn't finish fighting long ago, did you? That's why you blocked the entrance."
Just as I had blocked the dungeon entrance after defeating Gremory, Flauros must have blocked all the passages. To buy time to recover from their wounds.
"But I happened to arrive? This can't be helped. You were fated to be eaten by me. Especially...."
I thrust Slime Dragon No. 1 forward. Toward the enemy who appeared to be the leader, wearing distinctly feminine attire unlike the other beastkin.
"You. Heh, you're the leader of this dungeon, aren't you? Are you Flauros?"
"I thought you were just fat in the belly, but you're fat in the eyes too? Do I look like your daddy? You stupid pig."
"You're a friend who carries a rag in your mouth!"
The two Slime Dragons wrapped around my arms and stuck fast. In an instant, a thick whip, 1 meter in diameter and several meters long, was connected to my arm.
"Looks like you're a beast that only learns when you get hit!"
I tilted the Slime Dragon to the side.
"This is what you call a Whirlwind!"
I spun 360 degrees in place. The heavy Slime Dragons were forcibly dragged along by my strength, and using that centrifugal force, I spun around once more, even harder.
"W-what-?!"
Flauros(?) and the leopard beastkin were startled and stepped back, but the Slime Dragons were already raised by their tails and spinning like a windmill. They dodged the Slime Dragons with quick movements, but that alone couldn't stop our attack.
"A sprinkler is perfect for putting out fires!"
I spun one arm faster and spread both arms left and right. Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh-whoosh-whoosh—— My body, which seemed like it would tilt to one side, leveled out, and the Slime Dragons undulated their bodies, raising their tails sharply. As expected of veterans, Slime Dragon No. 1 seemed ready, nodding its head. I gave the order to live up to No. 1's resolve.
"No. 1, fire!!"
Simultaneous with my fire order, a massive amount of slime erupted from No. 1's tail. Phooosh!! The slimy body fluid of No. 1 scattered in all directions. Each lump was the size of a baseball, and its firmness was like a soft rubber ball. But even if it was a rubber ball, if you were hit by dozens of them at once with my strength and centrifugal force, it was enough pain to kill you.
Thwack-thwack-thwack!! Kyaaaaaaak!! The leopard beastkin were hit by the lumps of body fluid all over their bodies and collapsed. No. 1 poured out about half of its body fluid through its tail, and the balance of my arms quickly began to collapse as so much fluid drained away.
"No. 1, rest! No. 2, prepare!"
At my command, No. 1 relaxed its grip on my arm and fell, rolling on the floor. No. 1 landed on the cushion Lime had prepared with No. 3 and No. 5, and seeing the senior's actions, No. 2 finished loading.
"Fire!!"
Thump-thump-thump-thump. If No. 1 had fired like it was vomiting, No. 2 fired the lumps at the beastkin as if it were performing precision shooting. The beastkin, hit at full speed by the spheres of slime in the forehead, knees, and scrotum, were slammed into the wall without even a chance to scream.
Pshhh. No. 2 also quickly shriveled up. I tossed No. 2 onto No. 1, and using the centrifugal force from my remaining spin, I threw my body toward the only female beastkin still standing.
"Receive your guest!!"
I literally threw my body, which was spinning horizontally, straight at the beastkin.