Magical Girl (3): The Fake Kaijin Gambit

Hardcore magical girl stories are on the decline these days. Like most sensational genres, they hit hard at the start but get tough to sustain toward the end. Instead, it feels like more stories are popping up with villain-side underlings as the protagonists rather than the magical girls themselves. Never in a million years did I think I'd end up in an underling costume myself.

"L-Let's get started, Lisa..."

"Yes, Doctor."

Lisa nodded, signaling she was ready. She drew her kitchen knife, and right in front of us were the pigs the Foundation had rounded up for slaughter. Glancing around, I had to admit they'd done a solid job creating the vibe of a proper pig farm, even if it was thrown together in a hurry. The Foundation nailed the location scouting.

Lisa plunged the blade in with one swift motion, cutting off the pig's air.

"Kyaaah!"

"M-Monster! It's a chef monster...!"

"A monster's appeared!"

As a few pigs met their end, the nearby Suwon ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠citizens (actually Foundation staff in disguise) started screaming. Hearing the cries, Lisa bolted straight toward them and swung her knife in a mock threat, just enough to sell the act. Right on cue, the Foundation agents shouted,

"S-Someone save us!"

"Help us, Prism Lumina...!"

-Boom! At that moment, someone landed in a heroic pose amid a burst of unidentified light particles. A magical girl. The magical girl had arrived.

"Prism Lumina, guardian of Suwon City, has arrived! ...What are you? Monsters?!"

The magical girl blinked wide-eyed in confusion. Probably because we looked human, unlike the monsters she'd fought before. I forced a smile.

"F-Finally, you've shown yourself, magical girl...! I-I'm... an evil scientist from a secret society!" I shouted.

'Magical Girl's Birth' was an anomaly that sustained magical girls by continuously spawning kaijin. As long as magical girls existed, it kept producing monsters. Flip that around—if we supplied our own kaijin, maybe it wouldn't generate new ones? So we decided to fake some monsters ourselves.

Lisa, our office's top fighter. And me, disguised as the evil scientist.

...But did I really need to step up too? Lisa could've handled it solo, but we went all-in for the details. There was even a sexy female underling outfit, but on my 142cm frame? Total disaster. The white lab coat evil scientist getup, though? Fit like a glove. Thus, the universe's cutest mad scientist was born.

"W-We, the secret society, will conquer the world...! And this is my creation, Monster No. 1: the Chef Monster!"

I pointed at Lisa. Her pure white chef uniform had been modded into something a bit sexier. Honestly, she pulled off the evil underling vibe way better than me. Covered in pig blood with that ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠kitchen knife, she looked less like a chef and more like a slasher villain. Her creepy smile made the magical girl flinch. "Eek...!"

"World conquest? Like hell I'll let you!"

"D-Don't interfere with our plans! Take her down, Lisa!"

"Yes, Doctor."

Whoosh! Lisa charged at the magical girl, knife still dripping pig blood. Droplets flew as she thrust it forward.

-Clang! But it got stuck in the magic stick just like that. What was that thing made of? Metal? Wood? Plastic? No clue, but it shrugged off the knife like it was nothing—probably even a bomb wouldn't faze it.

The unexpectedly tough magic stick sent Lisa's knife bouncing back. Seizing the momentary opening as her stance wobbled, the magical girl swung.

"Magical Strike!"

Light particles burst forth. The kind of blow that had shredded countless kaijin before. One hit and it'd be game over—but Lisa was faster. Blindingly quick, she grabbed the magical girl's wrist mid-swing and hurled her like a baseball.

"What?!"

The magical girl clearly hadn't expected to go flying. She slammed into the wall.

-KABOOM! Deafening crash. Dust billowed like smoke.

"This world only needs me and the Doctor. Everyone else is unnecessary."

Ooh, Lisa's got acting chops. Anyone watching would buy her as a real monster. Though the setup's kinda sloppy—calling it a secret society when it's just me and her? Whatever. Lisa deserved a best actress award for that fox spirit performance. She scooped up her dropped knife and slowly approached the magical girl.

To prep for the fight, I'd let Lisa drink my blood. ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠Thanks to the bond effect with Nao, it healed monsters. And with more blood, it could even buff them.

First time using the enhancement, though... I'd powered her up just in case, but damn, it was working better than expected. Could she actually beat the magical girl?

—Or so I thought, until,

"Magical BEEEAM!!!"

-KABOOM!!

Light gathered and fired in a massive beam. Lisa blocked with her knife, holding it at bay—for a moment. Cracks spiderwebbed across the blade.

"L-Lisa...! Fall back!" I yelled desperately.

-Shatter! The knife exploded into fragments. Luckily, Lisa dodged before it fully broke. All she had left was the handle, which she tossed aside without a second glance. She shot me a look: What now?

"I-Impressive, magical girl! We'll retreat for today!"

"What? Don't run, you villains!"

"Let's go, Lisa!"

"Yes, Doctor."

Lisa scooped me up and bolted. The magical girl didn't pursue—maybe the impact dazed her, or the beam drained her stamina. Or our pre-planned escape route worked. Either way, success.

Once safe, I pulled out my phone.

"Deputy Park Jong-cheol, it's Mayuri. ...Did it work?"

I let out a sigh of relief.

Approaching—or even contacting—a magical girl isn't easy. But Lisa slyly slapped on the tracker mid-fight. Like hanging a bell on a cat's neck. The hard part's getting it done; once you do, the payoff's huge.

"G-Good work, Lisa..."

Lisa and I were heading back through the sewers. Magical girls can fly, so burrowing underground was the only way to safely widen the gap. Meant trudging through sewage stink, but no choice. Lisa grimaced slightly at the filth but stayed composed, walking beside me.

"Are you alright, Doctor? Any dizziness from the blood draw or discomfort?"

"You can drop the act now, Lisa."

She fought the battle, yet here she was worrying about me. Do I look that fragile?

Lisa peered at me intently. I stared back without thinking.

"Mayuri?"

"Nah, it's just... it's refreshing."

Lisa's shoulders were bare. The cute girl mod didn't suit sexy outfits on me, but damn, it worked on her. Face-wise, no one tops the universe's cutest—me—but body-wise? Tough call. Balance? Maybe Ari. She's tall, no excess flab. Plus, as a legit monster, she never gains weight no matter how much she eats. Model material, even. Yeoul's got decent height and curves—not bad, but my taste leans Lisa. Average height, but the rest? Explosive.

"Does this suit me, in your eyes, Mayuri?"

"Huh?"

"I don't get human aesthetics, except taste. So I wouldn't know if this outfit works."

Lisa like that. No fashion sense—or maybe no sense at all in various ways. She's usually so prim it doesn't show, but she might still need work to blend into society. Kick her out independent now, and who knows what accidents she'd cause. So when the hell do I get free from babysitting these cuties...?

"Not great for public wear... It's not exactly normal..."

"So I'm ugly like this?"

"N-No, I like it... Ah..."

Minor slip. Otaku tax. I didn't say it outright, but I dig our office girls' looks. That's why I installed the cute girl mod, ended up here... Of course I love cute girls, limited-time skins, the works. Gacha games too. But I keep otaku rants in check—experience says revealing tastes never ends well.

Anyway. I think Lisa's outfit rocks, but she might take it wrong. I glanced over—wrong guess. She was smiling.

"Got it. No problem then."

"No problem?"

"Yes. Oh, and I think your outfit's cute too, Mayuri."

"Yeah... I know..."

Universe's cutest here—any clothes slay. Chatting like that, we returned. Back at base camp, Deputy Park Jong-cheol greeted us with a beaming smile.

"Great job. Never dreamed we'd suppress 'Magical Girl's Birth' like this. Thanks to you, Fixer."

"N-No biggie... Lisa did the heavy lifting..."

I barely did anything. Just used the enhanced Ari bond to fool the girl. Had her bloodied? Planned to resummon anytime. But Lisa soloed it. I contributed zilch.

"Your staff was amazing too. Insane physicals."

"She had a strength-boost item..."

"I see."

Lie sold. He nodded, eyeing Lisa curiously—but bought it. Foundation has similar gear: pills for temp vision/speed/muscle boosts. Let us slide on her identity.

"Leave the rest to us. We'll handle it."

Foundation agents headed to the tracker site: a studio apartment, home to a woman in her 30s. Fired recently, per their intel—found blackout drunk.

"I'm protecting the world, hic... Lost my job, but I'm guarding Suwon, hic..."

Hiccuping, beer cans from the convenience store in hand, the Foundation memory-wiped her.

'Magical Girl's Birth' turns those who want to be magical girls into them. Wipe the desire, anomaly fizzles.

Just in case, I stuck around Suwon a week. No kaijin.

"Situation resolved. Feel free to head home, Fixer."

Foundation called it done and pulled out. Memory wipe ends the anomaly? That easy?

But the codex still lacked entry #21 for the anomaly. No resolution notice either. Suspicious, I headed back to Seoul.

Time passed.

"Mayuri."

Lisa returned from the changing room to the office lobby. Not her usual clothes—shoulders bare. The kaijin costume from before, custom-made for her. We'd ended up keeping it after laundry.

She showed it off. "Like this?"

"...Let's monitor a bit longer, Lisa."

"I prepared yours too."

She held up the evil scientist outfit for me.

A week back from Suwon. Word came: kaijin and magical girl sighted in Busan.