Masturbation
Clap!
“Ah…?”
I opened my eyes to the sudden sound of a clap.
My head felt a little dizzy. Blankly rolling my gaze around the room, I suddenly found myself locking eyes with Yohan, who was staring straight at me from right in front.
“Hah…!”
I gasped in shock and sat upright.
Why was he watching me from so close? My heart nearly leapt out of my chest.
More than that—when had the distance between us closed so much? I was certain that until just a moment ago we had been facing each other across the width of a desk for counseling…
As I worked to calm my startled heart, Yohan spoke.
“It’s gotten late. I need to start closing up the infirmary soon. What will you do?”
“Huh? Ah, I—I should head back too. Dorm inspection isn’t far off, and I still need to shower…”
“Mm. Then let’s leave together. I just need a moment to tidy up my things—could you wait about five minutes?”
“Ah, yes. Of course.”
Yohan finished packing, slipped off his white coat, and exchanged it for the coat hanging on the rack. He also removed the glasses he had worn throughout the session and tucked them into their case.
Watching him, my eyes widened slightly.
He’s surprisingly handsome…?
With those thick horn-rimmed glasses on, he had given off a perfectly ordinary impression. Without them, his whole face transformed. He still looked intelligent and calm, but something about his aura felt different—sharper, somehow.
I had no particular reason to take interest in men, so I hadn’t noticed before, but someone like him would probably be fairly popular among the girls. Then again, even with those thick frames he had never been unattractive, so it wasn’t entirely unexpected.
“What are you doing? Get up. Time to go.”
“Ah, yes.”
I must have been spacing out. At Yohan’s call I scrambled to my feet.
Once he confirmed I was out, he shut the door and locked it with his key.
We walked together for a short while, chatting lightly.
“How was the counseling? Nothing made you uncomfortable, I hope?”
“Ah, no. It was really comfortable. And… for some reason the infirmary just feels so cozy and safe…”
“Hmm, is that so? A good sign.”
“Pardon?”
“No, it’s nothing. More importantly—do you have any other worries? They don’t have to be big ones. Embarrassing concerns like today’s are fine, or even the most trivial little things. After all, the curriculum requires you to keep coming for counseling until graduation.”
“Ah… yes. That’s right. Then if anything comes up, I’ll tell you first, Teacher. I feel more at ease talking to you anyway.”
“Good. Lean on me anytime without hesitation. Ah—we should part ways here. Take care on your way back.”
“Yes, sir. Good night!”
I bowed politely in farewell, and we went our separate paths.
Back in my room, I washed in warm water and changed into pajamas.
Lying on the bed, I began replaying the day out of habit.
Today… I had received sex education from the teacher. I couldn’t remember the details clearly, but I was fairly sure I had learned the proper way to masturbate.
A man and a woman receiving sex education one-on-one might sound a little odd, but it really wasn’t strange at all. Yohan was the school nurse, and receiving sex education from the school nurse was not the least bit unusual.
Anyone who had gone through basic education would have experienced sex ed from the nurse at least once.
Even before ending up like this, I clearly remembered the health classes in middle school: how babies are made, how sperm meets egg, what a healthy view of sexuality looks like… things like that.
The education I received from Teacher Yohan could simply be seen as an extension of that.
Besides, I had asked for counseling about masturbation in the first place.
And all he had really taught me was that orgasm wasn’t something to fear…
But why is my memory so hazy?
Ugh.
My head throbbed again without warning. It had seemed to settle, only to act up once more. The pain was faint enough that I could push through it if I tried, but it was still annoying.
“Let’s see… it should be around here.”
I groped around until I found the medicine bottle. The headache pills Teacher had given me after yesterday’s first session.
I fetched water and swallowed one. Before long the pain began to ease. The stuff really worked.
With the headache gone, I finally sank into the bed in comfort.
Somehow I felt I might sleep soundly for the first time in a while.
…Yet sleep refused to come.
Just like last night.
My mind grew clearer and clearer, and a restless itch began to stir low in my belly.
I wanted nothing more than to just sleep, but it was impossible. I fidgeted my hips under the covers, then scratched my head in irritation.
Well, this body was in its prime, after all. Whether male or female, this was the age when biological urges ran strongest. The sudden surges of lust yesterday and today weren’t really strange.
Might as well just get it over with cleanly and sleep. Better that than spending another whole day feeling this frustrated.
I picked up my phone and started hunting for something suitable to get off to.
Impatience made my scrolling hand busy. Even though possession had flipped my entire world, the sites I knew still existed here. The search didn’t take long.
My body and gender had changed, but my tastes barely had. The kind of material I used to favor as a man leaned heavily toward humiliation play.
Women sobbing like animals while men dominated them… that sort of thing. Not something I’d proudly admit, but it felt fairly common as far as kinks went.
Looking for the same stuff even after becoming a woman left me with a strange feeling. Like I had turned into a pervert.
Then again, looking at the state I was in right now, “pervert” was already an undeniable fact.
Whatever. No point fretting over useless things.
I shook my head to clear the pointless thoughts and began gently caressing my heated body.
A hand slipped under my clothes, teasing the areola before pinching the nipple hard.
“Nnh.”
True to this hypersensitive body, a moan slipped out at once.
No matter how hard I tried, it was the kind of sound I simply couldn’t hold back.
If I wasn’t careful, the next room might hear me. I bit down on the collar of my shirt and continued.
Squeeze—
“Nnh, haah… haa…”
As I kept going, more and more force went into the fingers pinching my nipples. The firm peaks stung with a little pain, but the pleasure outweighed it.
Still, it soon began to feel insufficient. My body trembled with pleasure, yet that was all. There was no crackling of electric signals, no blanking of the mind—none of that “I’m about to come” sensation.
When Teacher Yohan had pinched my nipples, my hips had jerked as if I were about to climax right then and there…
…Did Teacher pinch my nipples?
“Mmm…”
An uneasy moan escaped as my hands suddenly stopped.
Frowning, I carefully replayed the day’s events. Everything after entering the infirmary was fogged over like mist.
I felt as though I had done something significant with the teacher, yet I couldn’t recall exactly what.
He had taught me the proper way to masturbate… but how exactly had he taught it…?
Why was my memory so faint? The question I had set aside earlier rose again.
Teacher Yohan pinching my nipples. I had no such memory. Or did I? Tch, my head hurt.
The headache that the medicine had quieted began creeping back.
My intuition insisted fiercely that I had to dig into these hazy memories. Yet no matter how hard I tried, nothing came into clear focus, leaving me only frustrated.
After long hesitation, I decided to ignore the intuition.
After all, the idea that Teacher Yohan had pinched my nipples made no sense. He was such a kind and trustworthy person. The notion that I could have undergone something like that from him and simply forgotten it was equally absurd.
I must have been mistaken. Lately this body’s intuition kept firing blanks. I had thought it was exceptionally sharp, but maybe it wasn’t always right.
Obsessing over every little thing only tires the mind. Rather than waste time on useless fretting, I wanted to finish masturbating and sleep.
Pinching my nipples alone wasn’t enough stimulation, so I slowly slid a hand down toward my lower belly. Easing the panties aside, my fingers found the smooth mound of my sex.
Squish.
My pussy was already soaked from the nipple play. Rubbing along the labia produced a wet, frictional sound.
“Ahn…”
My thighs trembled and clamped tightly around my hand. A considerable wave of pleasure climbed my nerves.
My vision went slightly hazy.
Even with the collar in my mouth, completely muffling the moans was impossible. I bit down harder and pushed a finger inside.
Squelch…
“Ugh, hnn…!”
Inside the vagina, I found a slightly ridged spot and tapped it lightly with my fingertip. A dizzying rush of pleasure flooded my head.
No—pleasure itself barely mattered. What hit me hardest was the sheer sense of taboo at the fact that I was fingering myself with my own hand. The reality of possessing a woman’s body struck me anew, and the pleasure seemed to multiply several times over.
Squelch… squish, squish…
My arms and legs were trembling so hard I could barely put strength into them.
Even the phone I still held felt like a nuisance. In truth, Eileen’s body was so lewd it hardly needed any warm-up; hunting for porn might have been a complete waste of time.
One hand was starting to feel insufficient. I set the phone aside and slipped the other hand into my panties as well, immersing myself fully.
One hand tapped and stroked inside my vagina while the other gently pressed and rubbed my clitoris.
My vision grew blurrier. Everything looked as fuzzy as cheap low-resolution pixel art.
“Hnnngh…!”
Just a little more… just a tiny bit more…
As if delivering the final blow, I carefully pinched my clitoris hard. The shy little nub that had peeked out so cutely was trapped between thumb and forefinger, quivering in a frail silent scream.
“—!——!!”
It was a soundless cry.
I squeezed my eyes and mouth shut, pouring every ounce of strength into holding back the scream that wanted to escape. My hips shook wildly. Like a live fish hauled onto land, my body thrashed several times. My lower half jerked back and forth in short, random spasms.
Squish…
By the time my vision gradually returned to normal, I finally withdrew both hands from my panties. My pelvis still gave intermittent little tremors, lingering in the afterglow of orgasm.
Out of habit I brought my thoroughly soaked hands to my nose.
The scent was far thicker than yesterday’s. That battery-like smell.
“……”
The room was quiet.
I picked up my phone to check the time.
The humiliation-training manga I had forgotten to close was still on the screen.
Startled, I fumbled with my fingers and accidentally hit the camera widget. The camera app, still set to selfie mode from when Nova and I had taken pictures before, opened at once and showed my face.
Half-lidded eyes looked dazed; lips parted in a soft, almost admiring expression that was devastatingly seductive.
I looked exactly like a pervert with dangerous tastes. The kind of lewd women molded to male fantasies that only appear in manga. The face on the screen was precisely that.
“……What the hell am I even doing.”
Out of pure embarrassment I muttered the words aloud and tossed the phone onto the nightstand.
A heavy wave of post-nut clarity crashed over me.
So women’s bodies got that too.
Still, having gotten off once left me feeling a little clearer.
The clothes… I’d have to wash them over the weekend. From now on I shouldn’t masturbate in bed.
…No, wait. “From now on”? What was I saying? From now on I wasn’t going to do this at all. It wasn’t like I’d die from skipping masturbation.
I changed out of the soaked pajamas and sheets, then, tormented by every kind of thought, finally managed to drift toward sleep.