No One Said Anything About the 5 Billion Won
My life had always been tough. Studying, job hunting, and even dating—everything had been a struggle.
I was still single, so dating remained difficult, but now that I was running a delivery service, there was no need to worry about unemployment. Life was definitely easier.
‘Now I’ll earn five hundred million won.’
“Tesu-hyung. By the way, how do I get into the nostril?”
I asked, and Tesu-hyung spat out the cup ramen he had just taken a bite of.
It went too far, even for me.
“By attaching a skeleton soldier to my fishing line while Calidi is asleep and...”
“Eh?”
I doubted my ears.
“Listen carefully. I haven’t seen Calidi’s face, but look at this body. Calidi’s inhale and exhale are basically hurricane-level winds. Dangling a skeleton soldier on the fishing line, bringing it right in front of its nostrils during the inhale—that’s a light skeleton soldier sucked in like a vacuum cleaner. Smoothly. Like going down a snake’s gullet.”
You have to be kidding.
“Seriously?”
“Then what? I should stuff a skeleton soldier into Calidi’s nostril while it’s awake? That’s suicide. No matter how tame Calidi is, if I make it twitch near its face, it’ll die.”
The five hundred million won felt like it had vanished in an instant.
I had figured out Calidi’s habits over the past few days—it hunted once a day and slept at night.
“Then how did Bae Hyeongshin get into the nostril?”
“How would I know? Bae Hyeongshin was probably sucked in by the inhale while Calidi was asleep too.”
“Are you seriously still believing Bae Hyeongshin is still inside Calidi’s nostril? What do you think, hyung?”
He shrugged.
“I searched everywhere inside the Oryukdo Gate. But why? Want to give up now? A guy who made a promise and now wants to backpedal in one breath? Disappointing.”
“Who said I’m not going to? I made a promise!”
“Then prepare the skeleton soldiers. The best one is silent, light, intelligent, and can fake death when necessary. Since you said it doesn’t matter if they die, right? They get resurrected anyway?”
“Yes.”
I stared at the skeleton soldiers.
Hansik was constantly teaching his younger siblings whenever he got a chance.
They had learned sign language, but Hansik sometimes got frustrated while teaching them.
“Since we’re doing this, send Hansik. Come here, Hansik.”
If their father were here, he would have ordered one of the other two skeleton soldiers to be sent instead, but those were the weak ones I already knew. In contrast, the AI-absorbed Hansik had learning, thinking, and application abilities on a completely different level.
“This guy will do it.”
“Damn right! I like this friend who is cool too.”
Hooray.
What am I supposed to order him to do and be so happy about?
You’re trying to make me send someone who might die.
“Cool friend. From now on, you’re working with me. Ready?”
Hansik didn’t answer and just looked at me.
He only follows my commands. What a precious guy.
“It’s fine, I’ll help you.”
Nod.
“But hyung, his name is Hansik, not Cool Friend. The others don’t have names, but he’s a named skeleton soldier. Different rank. And since he’s smart, he’ll listen to whatever I say.”
“Good. Listen up, friend. From now on, I’m going to dangle you from my fishing line and shove you into Calidi’s nostril.”
Swish.
Hansik shook his head.
Then he took out his smartphone and wrote something before handing it over.
[No need to dangle me from the fishing line. I’ll just dangle myself.]
“Eh? Casual speech?”
At Tesu-hyung’s reply,
Tap tap tap.
He wrote something else.
[What?]
“Pfft.”
I couldn’t hold back my laughter.
Hansik was precious—he only obeyed me.
“That’s right, summoner. Alright, whatever. The part about dangling you from the fishing line and pulling you in—I’ll handle it myself.”
Nod.
“You’re going to search Calidi’s nostril. The guy you need to find is there. Bae Hyeongshin.”
Tesu-hyung started showing photos of Bae Hyeongshin he had saved in his gallery.
Not just a couple. His phone was filled with tons of Bae Hyeongshin photos. You could feel his obsession with catching him.
“Got it? If you did, nod.”
Nod.
Then Hansik started writing on his smartphone again.
[But what if I find Bae Hyeongshin?]
“Shh, just wait and see, you see? What a show-off.”
[What?]
“Pffft.”
I couldn’t stop laughing.
“Ha... you guys are not even close to a fistfight.”
On the other hand, Tesu-hyung was genuinely frustrated.
It made sense. Hansik was even flicking his finger at him as if to tease him.
If he could speak, he probably would have said, ‘Drop it. Are you scared?’
“You’re so annoying.”
But I really couldn’t hit Hansik.
He rubbed his forehead in irritation and said, “Doosik, why don’t we use the other skeleton soldiers?”
“This one is the best! The others only learn one thing, but Hansik learns everything from one lesson. He’s a genius skeleton soldier.”
Hooray.
“Ha... I don’t like it.”
At those words, Hansik tried to raise his middle finger, and I quickly blocked him.
Luckily, Tesu-hyung prevented the scene.
“Who taught you that?”
Hansik, scolded, lowered his head. Hansik didn’t like Tesu-hyung.
That made sense because Tesu-hyung had been rude to Hansik from the start, calling him ‘Cool Friend’ without any respect.
“I know hyung used to be a total menace, but now you’re on the same side. Got it? Show respect. One team. Okay?”
Hansik made a circle with his thumb and index finger.
* *
There was some trouble, but both Hansik and Tesu-hyung understood they had to separate work from personal matters.
The solution was to create a group chat and coordinate opinions through messaging.
It was Hansik’s idea.
[Hansik]: What if I find Bae Hyeongshin?
[Tesu]: Fake dead.
[Hansik]: ?
I was watching the chat.
Hansik’s short question mark made Tesu-hyung sigh, but he pretended not to notice.
[Tesu]: I’ll handle the rest, so just tell me if you find him and fake dead. OK?
[Hansik]: ?
[Tesu]: Why! Again! What!
[Hansik]: Hyung, did you beat Bae Hyeongshin?
“Ah, damn...”
[Tesu]: Of course.
[Hansik]: Pfft.
Hansik stared at Tesu-hyung after sending the chat.
Tesu-hyung matched eyes with Hansik and sent another chat.
[Tesu]: You want to die?
[Hansik]: If hyung loses to Bae Hyeongshin, can I call you boss?
I was losing it. His lips wouldn’t stop curling down.
It felt like watching two kids squabbling in an online game.
Lame. Honestly, I didn’t even plan to go into the nostril...
[Tesu]: If I beat Bae Hyeongshin?
[Hansik]: I’ll treat you as hyung.
[Tesu]: Take responsibility for that.
[Hansik]: OK
The night of the promise was deep.
We all held our breath and whispered.
“He’s asleep, right?”
“I don’t know.”
“If I sniff his nose, it’ll be clear.”
Calidi had a weird sleeping posture.
When sleeping, he raised his turtle head straight.
It was faking sleep.
“His eyes are closed, so he must be sleeping.”
At night, the breathing of this huge creature was even louder.
Operation name: Extracting lion nose hair while sleeping.
Tesu-hyung raised the fishing rod over his head and got into casting position.
Hansik gripped the fishing line tightly and sent an OK sign with his hand.
The tense moment. Puuu... right when I heard Calidi’s exhale, Tesu-hyung timed it perfectly and swung the rod to cast.
Ssshiiick-
With the reel spinning at an incredible speed, the fishing line with Hansik dangling from it flew into the air.
Hansik made no sound.
Tesu-hyung poured mana into the fishing line, and Hansik flew high above the stiff head of Calidi.
Then came Calidi’s inhale.
This was the moment.
In mid-air, Hansik let go of the fishing line.
“It’s done.”
Swoosh.
“Whoa, this works.”
“You saw?”
Tesu-hyung and I exchanged a silent high-five and checked Hansik’s body cam on my smartphone.
The body cam of Hansik who had been sucked into Calidi’s huge nostril was shaking wildly.
How deep was he going?
“Hyung, are the nasal passages really this deep? No matter how big Calidi is...”
“......”
Tesu-hyung scratched his head.
It seemed things hadn’t gone according to plan.
“It looks like we passed the nasal passage.”
“Huh?”
Tesu-hyung rewound the body cam footage and said, “This spot looks like the nasal passage, but there’s nothing here.”
“What? Then where is Hansik right now... wait, no way...”
“It doesn’t look like the nasal cavity, maybe we’re passing through the esophagus...”
“Esophagus?!”
“Why? If you swallow a chunk of snot, it goes down your throat.”
“A chunk of snot...”
I stared at Tesu-hyung in utter disbelief.
Hansik who had gone into the nostril had become Calidi’s prey.
Tesu-hyung just scratched his head with an awkward smile.
“Bae Hyeongshin isn’t here.”
As expected, the theory that Bae Hyeongshin was hiding in the nasal passage was nonsense.
Actually, the idea that Bae Hyeongshin would even be in the Oryukdo Gate was Tesu-hyung’s imagination.
“Ha... my five hundred million won.”
“Eh? Wait.”
At that moment, the body cam footage of Hansik, which had been shaking wildly, stopped.
It had fallen somewhere and found stability.
It was a space vastly larger than the nasal cavity the size of a one-room apartment.
Like a hall.
“It’s the stomach.”
The video transmitting from the body cam stopped.
[Signal is unstable.]
“Oh no.”
Things were getting worse.
“Hansik is inside Calidi’s stomach, right? Now?”
“A guy who swallows anything like a snake, his stomach acid must be strong. Sorry, cool friend.”
“Summon!”
I tried to summon Hansik before his smartphone and body cam broke, but...
“Summon!”
It didn’t work.
He hadn’t died yet.
“Hyung, but does stomach acid dissolve bones too?”
“It dissolves, but it’ll take longer than just eating him...”
“Hansik is still alive. Inside Calidi’s stomach. Ah, but my body cam and smartphone! New ones! Damn it!”
“Sorry, sorry. Ah, but Bae Hyeongshin... I thought he was in there. Damn.”
Damn?
“Honestly, do you think it makes sense? Throw him in a turtle’s nostril and he lives?!”
“Hey, you were the one who suggested it first, weren’t you? And you were expecting it too.”
“Hyung keeps saying he’s sure! Anyway, buy me a new body cam and smartphone. Hansik’s cool friend outfit is expensive.”
“I’ll buy it, you cheap bastard. How much does that cost?”
To summon Hansik again, either he had to dissolve in stomach acid or eighteen hours after natural summoning expiration. Hansik was a skeleton, but he was the one I had telepathic connection with. I couldn’t help feeling worried and anxious.
♬
Then, Tesu-hyung’s smartphone rang.
“Who is it? At this hour. Eh?”
“Who is it?”
Tesu-hyung brought his index finger to his nose and asked him to be quiet, then answered the call.
“Yes, chief. What’s going on at this time? It’s the Oryukdo Gate, right?”
‘If he’s the chief, he must be an important person?’
But suddenly Tesu-hyung jumped up.
“Really? Bae Hyeongshin? Where? Changwon? Are you sure? Okay. I’ll go right away. Ah, I didn’t drink. No, I did have a few earlier! I’m completely sober! Damn, how do I call that patrol agent?!”
There was a loud voice exchange and then the call ended.
“What is it? Bae Hyeongshin?”
As expected, Bae Hyeongshin was somewhere else.
The idea that he would be in the Oryukdo Gate was also Tesu-hyung’s obsession-driven delusion.
“For now, it says a report came in that Bae Hyeongshin was spotted at the Changwon Gate. I have to go check. What about you? Are you going to keep digging up oyster shells here?”
“What if hyung goes and I can’t come back alone.”
“True. Alright.”
“Tell the others to dig oyster shells and I’ll go with you.”
“Got it. Okay, hello?”
I told the two skeleton soldiers I couldn’t burn them with fire to hammer oyster shells and kill them one by one.
They nodded and resumed work. It was slow, but their experience points were rising.
“Eh, I got a call? How long did the A-class take? I... fifty minutes?”
On the way back to the Oryukdo Gate entrance, Tesu-hyung was calling hunters around to share the situation. There was no time to talk to me. He dealt with Perilok, who was blocking him, faster than I could blink.
“Eh, I contacted the neighboring guilds? But how many grades is the Changwon Gate? C-grade?”
He didn’t put down his phone until he left the gate, and when he exited the Oryukdo Gate, Tesu-hyung took out his wallet, handed me a few blue checks roughly, and made the ‘I’ll contact you’ gesture with his finger before boarding a taxi and leaving.
Five 1-million-won checks in his hand.
Five hundred million won.... Not an easy amount.
For him, it was easy.
“What the... is it the price of the body cam and smartphone?”
Enough money. But what was this feeling of being shortchanged?
Honestly, I was quite upset.
We had only met recently, but even in a hurry, it wasn’t right to part ways like this, right?
Still, catching Bae Hyeongshin was more important.
“Even so, no one offered me money... did I nag too much? Sigh.”
I used my bitterness and regret as fuel and drank several more bottles of soju in my motel room.
I was probably more tired than I thought.
I had no idea when I fell asleep, but when I woke up, it was early evening the next day.
“At this rate, eighteen hours have passed. Summon.”
I scratched my messy hair and summoned Hansik.
“Hansik, thank you for... ouch?”
Clang clang.
The Hansik I met again was not the one I knew.
---