Lu Bu's Rampage: Ambush at Bianshui
Dong Zhuo's army couldn't possibly be unaware that the allied forces were marching on Hulao Pass. At this point, they were the only ones who could stand toe-to-toe with Gongsun Zan's forces. Yet, Dong Zhuo's troops showed no movement whatsoever.
"At this rate, we'll enter Hulao Pass without spilling a single drop of blood."
When one of the soldiers mentioned a bloodless entry, the morale of the vanguard soared. The buoyant mood spread even among the generals, including Jojo. But I couldn't ride this wave.
This is no good.
This kind of flashy morale would crumble like mud if we were ambushed. The closer we got to Hulao Pass, the more frequently and in greater numbers I sent out scouts.
"It's been six days out of seven with nothing happening— what could go wrong before we reach Hulao Pass?"
The scouts grumbled, but I ignored them. We couldn't afford to get complacent and all end up touring the Yellow Springs together. Our forces spotted enemy footprints but not a single shadow of a soldier.
"Three more scouts went missing this time?"
"They might have deserted, but it's more likely the enemy spotted and took them out."
It was clear enemies lurked nearby, but their true numbers eluded us.
"Ugh!"
While staying vigilant against invisible foes, I one day dreamed of falling into a trap dug by Dong Zhuo's army. I prayed it was the opposite of reality, not a precognitive dream.
Damn it, my dream was prophetic.
It happened on the seventh day since departing the mountain stronghold. The uproar erupted at Bianshui in Xingyang, just fifty li from Hulao Pass. Dong Zhuo's forces had been waiting for us there. And the first strike didn't hit our vanguard under Jojo—it was the central army, trailing ten li behind.
The sun was just touching the western peak when we halted the march to find a suitable spot for camp and rest. Suddenly, dust rose in the distance, and a single horse came galloping madly toward the camp.
"It's a messenger! Clear the way!"
The messenger tumbled off his horse, his armor shattered in places and crusted with blood. Staggering forward, he dropped to his knees on the ground.
"Dong Zhuo's army ambushed the central army. They're attacking from north and south simultaneously—the troops are in total chaos and can't fight properly. General Po Do engaged the enemy commander Lu Bu and was slain. I don't know how much longer we can hold."
Gasping for breath, the messenger urgently reported to Jojo.
"Enemy numbers?"
"Not certain, but at least four thousand."
Four thousand battle-hardened troops, seasoned against nomads and rebels, would make short work of ten thousand ordinary imperial soldiers in an ambush. The path we'd taken wound through tangled mountains and tributaries—Lu Bu must have used the terrain for a stealthy strike.
"We must reinforce Po Sin immediately. If we don't, the vanguard will be cut off and picked apart one by one."
No one disagreed with Jao In's proposal. If the central army—half our strength—collapsed, the remaining ten thousand wouldn't make it back alive.
"Send the cavalry first to aid them, with infantry following. The Art of War says not to divide your forces, but saving the center is more urgent now."
If the horse relays quickly, it'd take about an hour to reach them. Someone might scoff at three hundred doing it, but our cavalry had Guan Yu and Zhang Fei. Liu Bei's sworn brothers, worth ten thousand men each, could buy time before the center crumbled.
"Liu Xuan De!"
"Yes!"
Agreeing cavalry should go first, Jojo called for Liu Bei.
"Take three hundred cavalry and rescue the central army!"
"Understood!"
At Jojo's command, Liu Bei immediately led his riders to the aid. Jojo scanned the assembled officers and continued issuing orders.
"Zixiao, you command two thousand from the vanguard to clear the path. Once you link up, engage—pick your most experienced men."
"I'll divide the forces at once."
"Miaocai and Yuanrang, you take the rear guard of two thousand. Our men might panic and flee, so control them from behind."
"We'll ensure all six thousand arrive intact."
The three generals bowed and moved out. Finally, Jojo looked at me and Jo Hong.
"The rest follow me."
The briefing ended. The camp, moments from rest, buzzed with activity again. Soldiers hastily refastened armor they'd loosened and grabbed weapons.
"That'll help in battle—take one bundle."
I sorted supplies to carry from those to leave behind. In the sky, a blood-red sunset spread ominously. An ill omen if there ever was one.
The central army of ten thousand under Po Sin bustled with camp preparations. Close to woods, gathering firewood was easy. Exhausted soldiers set down weapons and set pots over fires. Sentries slacked, cooking smoke rose everywhere. A peaceful scene—until the ground quaked, shattering the silence.
- Rumble rumble rumble!
The faint tremor swelled into thunder shaking the earth. A sentry spotted the source and screamed, pointing east.
"Enemy attack!"
Dong Zhuo's cavalry charged straight at the camp. Leading the massive wave was a man on a red horse.
"I'll take you on, you bastard!"
Lu Bu, Fangtian Huaji at the ready, was a walking disaster. He skipped complex ambushes or traps—just struck at moments of laxity. And it was enough.
"Where's the colonel general?!"
Lu Bu's roar made Po Sin's men drop their weapons. No need to distinguish soldiers who couldn't even grip arms from scarecrows.
- Slash!
Lu Bu swung his halberd, crushing five men at once. Nothing clung to its path—flesh, bone, wood, all sliced equally.
"Follow the colonel general!"
Dong Zhuo's cavalry poured after Lu Bu through the scarecrows, shredding the disorganized infantry like paper. Screams and blood filled the camp in moments.
Po Sin's command structure had long collapsed. Staying meant annihilation.
"Take my spear, you scum!"
Po Sin's army had generals. Po Do, his younger brother, stepped up to block Lu Bu.
Dong Zhuo's numbers are few. If we engage properly, we win.
Po Do wasn't entirely wrong. Lu Bu and his cavalry hadn't overrun the whole camp. Pinning them here would let Po Sin's rallied forces prevail.
We can do this. He's human, after all.
But Lu Bu barely glanced at Po Do. He just swung his halberd lightly.
- Slash.
A precise strike through armor gaps. Po Do fell without a single exchange, head severed, body tumbling in a spray of blood.
Liu Bei's three hundred cavalry arrived to hellscape. Flames devoured the camp greedily. Joining in wouldn't turn the tide.
"Yun Chang, Yi De—stop Lu Bu. Block him to halt the charge."
Liu Bei nailed the key. Whenever soldiers tried regrouping, Lu Bu smashed through. Rally the lines for a counter, and Lu Bu had to be stalled first.
"Yes!"
Guan Yu and Zhang Fei charged at the order. Liu Bei led the rest toward camp—but not at Lu Bu.
"We block their infantry!"
Dong Zhuo's cavalry had torn open the path. If their foot soldiers poured in, no chance to regroup. No time to lament failing the horse—no, target what we could.
"Traitors! Liu Xuan De has come!"
Liu Bei gripped his twin swords and charged. Guan Yu and Zhang Fei spurred hard, quickly catching the rampaging Lu Bu.
"Time to call out Lu Bu."
Guan Yu pondered how. Zhang Fei grinned mischievously and bellowed.
"You three-family slave Lu Bu, hold there! This Zhang Yi De will face you!"
Zhang Fei's earth-shaking roar pulled even distant ears. Lu Bu, butchering Po Sin's men, whipped his head around.
"I'll rip out your tongue!"
Lu Bu charged Zhang Fei, slamming down his halberd. Their weapons clashed with eardrum-rattling force. Zhang Fei ignored his screaming arm muscles and held.
"You bastard!"
Guan Yu swung his Green Dragon Crescent Blade wide at Lu Bu's back.
- Clang!
Lu Bu glanced back, parrying with the shaft. Then he wildly spun, separating them.
Against two ten-thousand-man generals, Lu Bu endured.
"Three dads and one mom—must've been rough on her at night!"
"Butcher-faced pig—your dad's a wild boar?"
Even mid-fight, Zhang Fei taunted. Lu Bu fired back, refusing defeat in words. The Crescent Blade grazed his calf, Zhang Fei's spear hammered his armor. Wounds slowed him—but he wasn't alone. Guan Yu's prized beard was singed, Zhang Fei's arms cracked.
"Hahaha! You're worth crossing blades with!"
Lu Bu laughed madly, swinging. Zhang Fei ducked, Guan Yu blocked with his shaft.
"Try this!"
Lu Bu wheeled on Zhang Fei.
- Kaang!
Zhang Fei jammed the halberd's fang, trying to stall. A moment's delay, and Guan Yu would strike.
"Hmph!"
Lu Bu spun the halberd free, dodging Guan Yu on Red Hare. Wheeling, he sent three Po Sin soldiers to the afterlife.
"Playtime's over."
Wiping sweat, Lu Bu eyed around and addressed them. Liu Bei's three hundred had tied up Dong Zhuo's infantry at the cost of near annihilation.
Mission accomplished.
Lu Bu's goal was annihilation via ambush. He'd bagged generals, shredded Po Sin's lines. Lingering risked encirclement by cavalry—or a fatal hit from the duo.
Time to withdraw.
"That's enough for today."
Lu Bu swung wide, shoving them back, and turned his horse. Zhang Fei and Guan Yu pursued, but Lu Bu's arrows were vicious—dead between the eyes. The duo abandoned chase.
"Retreat!"
- Bwoooo!
Lu Bu's horn followed. The storm of enemies ebbed into darkness like tide.
"Brothers! You alright?!"
Liu Bei checked Guan Yu and Zhang Fei once foes retreated. Thankfully, all three unscathed. Not all ten thousand were so lucky. One bled out his last breath. Another shoved spilling guts back in. A leg-crushed man laughed madly, slitting his throat.
"Po Do! Brother!"
Po Sin wailed, clutching his brother's severed head.
"Brother. Gather the scattered men and salvageable supplies now."
Guan Yu urged Liu Bei. No time for gloom.
"Right. Supplies first."
The disaster's wake: wrecked camp, Po Sin corpses strewn. Jojo's main force arrived half a shichen later—battered themselves.