Chapter 339
Chapter 339
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Translator: uly
Chapter: 339
Chapter Title: How to Survive as the Second Son of a Magical Noble Family
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Luca's words lingered in my ears. I couldn't believe what I had just heard. You've been alive all this time because of me? You, Luca?
"Eli, I don't know if you'll believe me, but what if I told you I knew about you even before we became friends?"
Luca's clear voice spread through the night air. It sounded unreal for no reason at all, stirring a vague sense of dread in my chest that I'd never felt before. Knowing I must look like a fool, I still waved my hands around.
"You've always known about me! I've known about you too... through Pleroma, that is. And that's hardly knowing someone, right? Just hearing the name in passing. We first said hello and became friends in our second year of high school~"
"......"
Luca wore a smile I'd never seen from him before. Ah. I recognized the emptiness in that expression. It was the face I used to make as a child; the one I'd show to Leo, Father, Yulia, and my few friends when they asked how I was after coming back from something suffocating.
"Elias, I have a lot I'm hiding from you. From everyone, not just you."
I know.
That's how Luca has always been. Always knowing information we couldn't access, never able to explain it, and crucially, using those solutions to actually succeed. Always speaking of our future with such certainty. It's maddening. How could it not be? Do you not trust me, or did you acquire that information bearing a heavy burden alone, unable to speak of it...? There've been more than a few times I've wanted to grab Luca by the shoulders and shake him!
But I couldn't. People's hearts don't bend to my will. Everything flows with time, and everything I think I possess slips away like sand clutched in my fist, scattering to places I can't see. Following the lineage of my thoughts back through philosophers like Marcus Aurelius and ancient epics, my great-uncle Friedrich Hohenzollern had long ago taught me that the world does not bend to my desires. My first magic teacher taught me helplessness and showed how pure malice could destroy a child's talent. My father, with his timid and unbold nature, tearfully explained how his child's existence might force him into exile. My literature teacher, with his petty aggression, proved that a single Iliad could uproot a child's interest in words and writing entirely. My relatives of various ages showed me how abject submission to power looks and demonstrated who protects and reinforces that power. The world compelled me to become what it had taught me.
I've long since surpassed my magic teacher. Sing, Goddess, of the wrath—I love the thick air of the Iliad, like dust trailing a chariot. I pity my father, whose lifeline rests in my kind brother's hands, and now have the leisure to sadly note the blue veins on his wrists beginning to wrinkle. I neither condemn nor defend my many opportunistic relatives. I leave behind the countless memories that fed and raised me from infancy and become myself.
Great-uncle was right. Just as the world doesn't bend to my will, it couldn't bend me to its own. Just as I outright refused to become what those around me wanted, this holds true everywhere. Others' hearts don't bend to my will either. My life has been one of resistance against enmity, leaving me blind when it comes to winning people's hearts. So perhaps in winning a friend's heart, I need to set aside my rebellious experiences and approach differently—but I believe one thing remains common. I don't need to impose what I want on Luca. I need to wait for him to come to me. If his heart matches mine, he'll one day sort out his own feelings and tell me everything. When all things work together appropriately.
"I'll have to keep hiding it from you all going forward. Unless circumstances force me, I can't tell anyone. Revealing it brings no benefit. Worse, it might send our relationship hurtling toward the worst. You want to know why I think that?"
I could see the water's ripples reflecting in Luca's clear eyes. He was voicing what needed to stay hidden. With a smile bordering on resignation, he spoke.
"I know this isn't right either. It wasn't my choice, and I still don't understand what's going on."
"......"
"Maybe everything will go back to square one someday. Even if I don't want to return now—isn't that right? That's the natural order, or so I believe. Regardless of what I've come to love."
Where are you going back to? You say you've come to love it—what do you mean it's unrelated? Whatever news you bring, I won't abandon you. We can't go back to square one now. The dense trust you've shown me in this short time is already deeply etched in me—how could it be possible now? For my 108-year-old self, those months would be mere repetition of inertia, a fleeting brush against the skin that never reaches the heart. But for my 18-year-old self, that time is more than enough to form the foundation of a lifetime. I'll think back on this 18th spring every time I survive death's door ahead. Decades from now, centuries even.... Elias thought this while silently listening. Luca had just said he couldn't reveal anything, but that wasn't true. This—all these words—were Luca's confession. He was clumsily sharing with me a story he'd never told anyone.
"Of course, it's just baseless speculation. My power wasn't involved from the start, so the end isn't in my hands either. I just have to wait for an unknowable future while avoiding death around graduation. From any basis. I can't just let go and let someone whose free will I've already taken die like a dog. Nor can I die by my own hand if it comes to that—or let someone else kill me. No matter how much I wish for the end, I don't want to leave it to hands that aren't mine."
"......"
"But I don't know how to turn this around, Eli. I have no idea what's happening either. So... I'm sorry in advance. I'm not trying to deceive you."
The moisture in his final words made me open my mouth. But contrary to my brief thought, Luca's eyes didn't waver. He gazed at me calmly, like a tree deeply rooted in the earth.
"I can't reveal exactly what I'm apologizing for right now, but I wanted to tell you this much."
Luca smiled faintly, eyes recalling something, then continued after a moment.
"Elias, I've survived this long thanks to you. Choosing your story at the last moment was the best decision of my life."
I felt the weight of words I'd never imagined bearing. Luca said he'd lived until now by watching my life's trajectory. What does that mean?
"You chose."
A faint question slipped from my lips.
"In times you don't know, I admired you, hoped for your victory, and wished for your happiness more than anyone in this world. You overcame everything I failed at, showed how my failures could lead to victory. Similar to what you said to me earlier, right?"
Had Luca always kept up with my news? No, it's more than that. As he said, there's a story he can't tell me tied to this. Whatever secret Luca holds doesn't matter. I focused on this moment of him opening up.
"You thought I made anything possible. Overpraise. I was wandering, unsure where to go. Unlike you, who knows himself, I didn't even know who I was, Eli."
At those words, I felt strength enter my spine. I quietly raised my head. Luca let his gaze wander in the air, voice drifting on the wind.
"You called me a machine once? True, maybe. I had no likes or dislikes. That's my nature. The little elements that form a person's identity scatter in me before they can build up. My childhood was emotionless time made form. I've never loved stories, yet people are made of their stories."
It sounded like he'd never loved a person. Luca continued, eyes holding the water's light.
"More precisely, after so long like that, I didn't even know what I loved. Realizing too late after letting everything pass—what foolishness. That's when I met you."
"......"
"For someone with no likes or dislikes, nothing in the world holds meaning; it just passes by. No true desires, no real drive to strive. Fitting in with peers was hopeless. Goodwill and malice clung to me always, but with no likes or dislikes, it didn't faze me. By luck, I passed school life without apparent struggle, but nothing remained for me. Just fatigue."
Peers, school life.... Lucky. My mind went blank. But above all, the words echoing in my ears were the ones he'd repeated.
"No likes or dislikes."
"Want an example?"
"Yes."
"If someone stabbed my stomach, I wouldn't hate them. The fleeting irritation, pain, defiance I feel aren't real; they crumble quickly. That's what no likes or dislikes means."
"Are you talking about Robert Mueller?"
Luca shook his head. When the words didn't continue, I swallowed and asked again.
"Why don't you hate?"
"Don't know. Probably didn't love my existence enough to allow that much attention."
The answer came without a trace of regret. Even telling his own story, his tone seemed indifferent, like it was someone else's. Yet that immediate reply hinted at endless contemplation. Unable to grasp it, I asked again.
"Me, or that person?"
Luca shrugged. Negative emotions are attention too. Yeah, I get it. I knew what it meant. But an elusive emptiness permeated his words. Ironically, I thought he'd loved too much. I had no intention of projecting my ignorant judgment onto him, so I stayed silent.
"Elias. From as far back as I have memories, becoming someone else came before becoming myself. Unable to know who I was beyond reenacting fictional characters, even I saw myself as a blank, tasteless shell. Becoming a character from another's story was my only option left. For someone with nothing, even a fragmentary tale created by another's hand briefly became mine."
It wasn't the Luca I knew. Luca let out a self-mocking chuckle.
"How empty is someone who can't stand alone...."
No, that's not true. I wanted to refute, but the time wasn't right, and I had no right. I knew he was sharing his own story.
"Having a profession meant to hold a life, yet unable to craft my own story—how ridiculous. I didn't know how. My life has been nothing but being swayed. I haven't lived long, so I knew how much time and possibility lay ahead, saw past judgments crumble to dust with time, learned nothing in the world is certain. Each day, I understood those I hadn't before, felt prior views shift, grew distant from my past self. So these agonizing times are mere childhood troubles, destined to feel like old dreams later—knowing such a future might await me. But I felt no need to reach it."
"Why?"
At my question, Luca tilted his head expressionlessly. Then, with a face holding no meaning, he said.
"I was tired."
Luca said no more on that. Only the sound of water lapping in the wind. Soon, he began smiling lightly, as if amused.
"As I said earlier, that's when I met you. Like in the catacombs, you won't ask anything this time either. If only I could detach memories and show you my time. My labyrinth will surely reflect it."
"......"
"I owe you so much time, and still do. Thank you."
I couldn't fully understand his words. Luca hadn't told me everything yet, and even stretching my imagination from them, it didn't come easily. Everyone has their own world, so his and mine differ. But I know whatever reason he suffered, even if he'd pondered it long enough to speak calmly now as if it were nothing, it's not a story to share anywhere. That's what mattered to me now. I truly felt how he thought of me, sensed his emotions from his words, and it left my heart heavy. And yet, at the same time, I wasn't sure if it should be this way....
Something welled up from within me.
"Luca."
"Yeah, speak."
"You know? This is the first time I've heard your story."
"Hm, I've always told you...."
"No, Luca. Not about your brother or family, survival, incidents, or Pleroma."
Luca's pink eyes slowly turned to me. Or maybe my vision was flowing slowly. For the first time today, I felt a joy I'd never known, pressing it down in my chest before voicing it to reach his ears.
"Your story. You've told your story for the first time."
* * *
I see the light in Elias's eyes. As always, it shone far more intensely than I'd imagined, full of perfect confidence, sharp as the wounds of his lifetime, soft as the empathy born of early maturity, embracing all.
Ding—!
Congratulations!
‘Proposal 2: Increase Elias Hohenzollern's favorability +1 within deadline (1/1)’ success! Confirm ‘Route 1 ― [+5 Points]’.
I hadn't meant to say this.
Hadn't planned to gain points this way.... From an unexpected place, I'd won Elias's heart.
"Truth is, Luca—as you know, not all friends share intimate stories. Most is like, 'Wanna grab beer at the tavern by school after class?'"
"High schoolers say that...?"
"Yeah, or 'Wanna do homework together after? Come to our family summer villa on break? How's student council going? My friend's annoying me. I accidentally smashed the dorm stairs—should I replace the boards before they notice?' Etc. Even friends rarely have time or need to share inner stories. That's why the ones who do are called closest friends, right?"
There were some pretty specific examples mid-way, but I nodded anyway.
"Right."
"We've crossed life and death together, so we don't share the sentiments of ordinary friends. That's clear. You, Leo, and Narke have become especially precious to me, and I think you feel similarly. To me, you're like parts of my life."
"Yeah, same for me."
"The sentiments we share are byproducts of external pressures. The world made us tighter, and we made ourselves this way. But even so, camaraderie doesn't always open up our most fragile memories."
That's not the only condition needed to hear another's life. More is required to draw out one's own. That's what Elias was saying.
"You can't say backs together means sharing hearts. I've waited for today. The day I'd hear the sound from your heart."
Elias smiled, pointing to his ear. Yes, this beginning was necessary. Already friends like life itself, now we aimed to surpass that. I smiled back and said.
"You know today's just the start?"
"Oh, you have more to tell me?"
I nodded. But not now. Even if talking, we couldn't keep serious in a play spot, and Elias must be tiring of the water, so better before bed or tomorrow.
"Then, Luca."
"Yeah?"
"Let's go in again!"
"......"
Elias pointed at the water. Who's tired? Had I just thought Elias was weary of the water? Gritting my teeth behind a smile, I said.
"I'm drying my robe. No."
"Just take it off and go in!"
"That's obvious. No. I'm done playing."
"Aaaaah~"
Elias clung to my knee. His press grew stronger, so I tried to kick him off with my leg. Yeah, I tried.
"...!"
Some plant grabbed my shoulder. Before my head hit the rear tiles, I urgently drove my elbow into the ground. I spread mana to absorb the impact, but no shock reached me anyway.
'Huh.'
Now I saw the floor covered in grass pulled from around. Reflexively turning, I saw Leo leaning against the sliding door, dressed head to toe in bath-inappropriate clothes. He'd been watching a while, then smiled and said.
"Looks like you had fun."
"......"
From my seated view, he was hidden, but Elias could see him. Glancing at Elias to ask how long, Elias shrugged too. Then pointed accusingly at Leo.
"What's with the manners? Not changing?"
"What."
"You come to someone's play spot fully dressed like a rude jerk?"
I wondered what this meant, but agreed with Elias, so didn't stop him.
"My arm hasn't healed, can't go in water. Want to, though."
"Then leave. Who wears a jacket into the hot springs?"
"Then Lucas."
Leo nodded toward me. Comparing me now? I patted my clothes and said.
"At least show effort by changing into a shower robe."
"Same difference...."
Leo crossed arms, snorted softly, then asked lowly.
"Why'd you take off the artifact?"
"Playing with Elias."
Elias tilted his head and joined in.
"Why~? Can't take it off?"
"The piercings you wear are just accessories; this is functional. Fun's fine, but to avoid risks, better leave artifacts on, no?"
True, for function. Great core-smashing function. With one artifact off, halving damage now—perfect chance to smack Leo's core? But decided against casually attacking a friend. As Elias pouted and scowled, Leo shrugged like, what can I do?
"Come out now. Got something to say to Lucas."
"Why?! No. Gonna play with Luca 100 more hours."
"You would."
Leo continued, face saying he hadn't expected otherwise. Then with a gentle smile, he beckoned.
"Sir Ernst."
"......"
In this situation? Absurdity swirled with thoughts, drawing a hollow laugh. Elias's hospital words flashed: 'This is the core-smack chance, huh.'
Not calling without reason, so what he says next decides the core's fate. I rose with a polite smile.