The Weight of Unspoken Desires
Even after arriving at the office, I remained in a daze. Like an idiot, I just wiggled the mouse cursor back and forth, killing time. What the hell... was that supposed to be? The spot where my niece's lips had touched still burned hot. It felt so intense I worried I might have actually been scalded. I didn't think I was foolish enough to confuse basic goodwill with something more... but I had no idea how to interpret her actions.
And what was that about calling Min-a "that woman"? What did it say about me that I'd felt a rush of satisfaction in that moment? Should I have scolded her for being so rude? Or should I have agreed with what my niece said? Thanks to all that, I'd been out of it since morning. Unable to focus properly, I kept making stupid mistakes. Entering the wrong measurements. Opening the wrong files. Sending emails to the wrong people.
Get a grip. What exactly was I supposed to do? If I kept going like this, I might as well just go home. I was wasting time like a fool, accomplishing nothing. The tasks piled up like a mountain. No one could do them for me. Yet my work showed zero progress. I rubbed my eyes. Slapped my cheeks. Tried everything in a frantic attempt to regain my concentration, but it was all useless.
Should I have grabbed my niece back then and asked what she meant? No... it was probably just a silly prank, and here I was obsessing over it...
While I kept turning these foolish thoughts over in my head—
"Assistant Manager Kim."
"Ah, yes. Representative."
"No, sit down. Sit. I was just thinking we could grab lunch together if you don't have any plans."
Suddenly, the representative called out from behind me. Like a thief with a guilty conscience, I jumped up from my seat even though I'd done nothing wrong.
"Nothing special going on, right? Or am I wrong?"
"No, nothing. Then should Min-a also..."
"No, no. Just the two of us. Let's have a guys' lunch."
Come to think of it, I hadn't properly reconciled with Min-a. When she'd stormed off in a rage, I hadn't tried to stop her or chase after her. I'd just stood there frozen.
The representative must be bringing up lunch because of that.
It was the common tragedy of an office couple whose relationship was public knowledge. When the two of us turned cold and stopped talking, everyone else started walking on eggshells around us. They could probably guess we'd fought, but no one was bold enough to ask about it directly. Still, they couldn't just ignore it either. In the end, it seemed the representative had decided to step in.
"Alright, alright. If there's nothing urgent, let's head out early. You can finish the rest later. The boss is calling."
The representative took me to a nearby eel restaurant.
"I noticed last time that heavy meat for lunch felt a bit much for you. So I deliberately chose something lighter and easier to eat."
"Thank you."
The conversation while we waited for the food felt strangely burdensome. I knew the general purpose behind arranging this meal, but I had no good answers ready. Why did you fight with my daughter? When are you two going to make up? You can't keep going on like this. Yeah. Why did we fight? Even though I'd known this father and daughter duo would end up bothering me like this.
"Hmm... how have things been lately? The busy period should be mostly wrapped up. We pretty much finished that big order from before, right?"
"Yes."
"If there's anything I need to know, tell me right away. You can handle the simple stuff yourself, Assistant Manager Kim. No need to bring every little thing to me. Look at it from below and organize it. Your eye for that is sharper than mine."
"I'll keep that in mind."
"I see that you're cautious, which is good, but you tend to focus so much on the small things that you miss the big picture. Think bigger. Bigger. The person who'll eventually sit in my chair can't keep doing that."
The usual stream of advice. Some of it went in one ear and out the other. Some of it I stored in my head for the next appropriate response. Remember the advice I gave you while we were eating last time? Of course, Representative. I've engraved it in my bones. Yes, yes. As my answers grew increasingly simple, the food arrived. It was a mouthwatering rice bowl.
"Oh, food's here. Eat up. Young people need to eat a lot and build their strength. An old man like me closing in on sixty can't eat too much of this or I'll just toss and turn all night."
His hearty laugh and the way he passed me the food carried an undercurrent of pressure. Or perhaps the entire occasion itself did. Every word he spat out while deliberately summoning me here to "keep in mind" was laced with that same burden.
What would they all do if I said I wouldn't?
My niece's words echoed in my head. That woman is nothing to you, Samchon. That's right. If I quit this company. And if I took it one step further and called off the marriage with Min-a.
"By the way... what's going on with you and my daughter? The atmosphere between you two seemed pretty off today."
As expected, we finally reached the main topic.
"It's just a little... You know how it is with our family matters. I said a few things because of my niece, and it hasn't resolved yet."
"I know, I know. It's just... Later when you have a daughter of your own, you'll understand. No matter how hard you try to be fair about everything, it doesn't work. You always end up thinking from your daughter's perspective. You're her uncle, sure, but an uncle is an uncle. A father is a father. You know what I mean?"
"Yes."
"Of course I understand how you feel too. This isn't some simple issue, so of course I get it... Just endure it. Fighting will only tire both of you out anyway. No one knows my daughter's personality better than I do. Right?"
"......Yes."
"Then I'll trust that you'll handle it appropriately? Honestly. Min-a too. Sometimes that kid is so bold, and other times she's so sensitive. Having your niece in the new home must be burdensome, of course, but to keep making it an issue..."
"I suppose doing better on my end is the answer. I'll do my best so Min-a doesn't feel neglected."
"That's it! That's the spirit. A woman is ultimately what her man makes of her. Now that you've eaten plenty of eel, go fight for it, Assistant Manager Kim. You'll see right away whether that girl throws a tantrum or not."
Having gotten the satisfactory answer he wanted, the representative's face brightened. We continued chatting about this and that. How young people these days don't know hardship, and the difficult times he went through before establishing himself. How pretty his daughter was. How lucky I was to be the one taking her. Advice to keep that in mind. Since the topic had come up, he showed me photos of Min-a as a child. The exaggerated fuss he made over them as if seeing them for the first time, even though he'd shown me countless times before. The same old flow of time. The boredom and irritation that felt even more tedious and annoying than work. To keep him from noticing the haze of emotion filling my chest, I had to clap even harder at the representative's boasting.
......
When I returned to the company, I happened to run into Min-a. She was still icy cold.
Sigh.
"Have you eaten?"
"......Yes."
She barely nodded without saying much even after seeing me. Her responses were half-hearted. Suddenly realizing no one was around us, I reached out without thinking and—
"!"
I grabbed Min-a's ass with all my strength. Through her skirt, I could feel the soft flesh I'd been the first to teach.
"......Why?"
"Just. I wanted to touch you more than usual today."
"Assistant Manager... I mean, Oppa. This is unusual for you."
"We still have time left in lunch. Let's go somewhere for a bit."
It was a sudden surge of lust that surprised even me. Maybe it was because of the representative's chatter, but I felt like taking it out on someone. In the company he was so proud of, with the daughter he'd raised so preciously. If I took her. If I claimed her.
"Where are we going to do it? What if someone sees?"
"Where's the woman who used to climb on top of me in the representative's office?"
"That was then! Now Dad is here and lunch break is almost over!"
"Stop talking so much and spread your legs. You said it yourself. The company is yours, and you're mine. Just follow me."
Beside the emergency stairwell door, I hiked up Min-a's bottoms.
"Hngh... ha... ha... Oppa... ha..."
Rough movements that could have been either foreplay or venting. Unlike usual, without any proper warm-up, just wherever my hands went. I kneaded Min-a however I pleased, forcing my emotions into her. But no matter how much I groped her, no matter how I shoved my hand under her clothes, stripped off her underwear and made a mess of things, the emptiness filling my chest refused to fade.
Have I finally gone crazy?
If I was going to lose my mind, I wished it had happened in a more appropriate way. At the very least, I wished the world had gone dark after seeing my niece find her happiness. I moved even more violently on purpose. More like a beast. I shoved my fingers into Min-a's mouth. She sucked on them clumsily, covering them in saliva. I smeared it all over her ass. Then—
"Hngh. Ha. Hah. Haa. It feels good. Oppa. Haa. Haa."
I soon began thrusting my hips. Even while having sex, I still felt empty. Even as her moans echoed. Even as the sound of our bodies slapping together filled the building, everything felt hollow. It was like having sex in a dream. My woman was crying out in ecstasy, yet what was I doing? What kind of desire was I trying to pour out?
"......Huu."
After spending that beastly time together, I finally released the tangled knot inside me onto Min-a's ass.
"Haa... Oppa... seriously... it feels like my ass is going to get burned."
Without even thinking to wipe away the semen flowing down her body, I stood there stupidly. I knew I couldn't keep going on like this, yet I remained dazed. Still empty. I didn't understand myself at all. I didn't know how to resolve these feelings.