Magical Auntie? Magical MILF?
"You were quite the successful hero back in your active days, weren't you, Team Leader?"
"I like to think so...? I at least held onto B-Class until I retired. I may not have been at the top of the rank, but I think I can take some pride in that."
"I thought as much."
At a little cafe in front of the Association, I'd come to see my auntie—no, the Team Leader—for the first time in a while.
I'd been busy for some time, trying to figure out how to help the heroes under my care—Baek Eun-hwa especially. Between cheering on Batori's activities and running around all sorts of places with Saran, one thing after another had left me short on time. Today, though, Saran had a request to handle, so I finally had a gap in my schedule.
"So why the sudden interest? Something you need to reference?"
"Oh, nothing like that. I just happened to come across some footage from your active years."
Which was why I'd come to see the Team Leader after quite a stretch. I didn't have much else going on, and I had a report to submit to the Association anyway... two birds, one stone.
"...My active years?"
"Yes, your active years. Back when you were a fresh, dewy-eyed girl in your early twenties—maybe about two years after your debut? No glasses, a cute hero costume, all dressed up and looking gorgeous."
"......"
"Oh, and the costume you wore as a rookie was different from the one you retired in, too. The debut version was a bit more revealing..."
"S-stop...! How about we drop that subject...? That was almost ten years ago. Do we really need to talk about it now? Ah, Charlotte. How about I buy you one of the new desserts they just put on the menu? Hmm?"
"Pfft..."
And, well, I also wanted to tease her a little.
Anyway, I didn't have any grand reason for bringing up the Team Leader's active years. I just figured it might help, even a little, with the heroes I was counseling. The Team Leader, in particular, had stayed active for a remarkably long time.
Even at a glance, she'd gone from her early twenties all the way through her late twenties. Considering how stressful the hero profession was... that really was a long career.
"Team Leader, during your time as a hero, did you ever deal with villains coming after you for revenge? Anything like that?"
"Hm? Revenge?"
"Yes, revenge. Villains do get sent to rehabilitation facilities, but the recidivism rate is pretty high. I figured you must have run into some dangerous situations because of that."
"Hmm... I did, yeah. Most of them either got rehabilitated or never got out in the first place, so it wasn't that common."
"I figured as much."
Truth be told, I'd been thinking about the remnants of that organization Saran had wiped out. It was more curiosity than worry that had brought me to the Team Leader.
Saran and Baek Eun-hwa both had experience, of course, but I figured it would be better to ask someone who was a genuine, bona fide veteran.
I knew she'd hate it if I used a word like "seasoned"... Still, anyone who'd spent nearly a decade as a hero was bound to have useful advice.
"So, why do you ask?"
"Well... the truth is, I got kidnapped last month."
"...What?"
"It had something to do with Saran. I just happened to get kidnapped, and I was a little curious whether that kind of thing is common, so I thought I'd ask."
"......Kidnapped?"
"Yep. Ah."
The moment the words left my mouth, it hit me. Come to think of it... I'd never actually told the Team Leader about getting kidnapped, had I?
On the day it happened, I'd known she would worry herself sick if I said anything, and I'd been exhausted besides, so I'd just thrown out some half-baked excuse...
"...Ahaha."
"......"
"Haha......"
"Why didn't you tell me...? If something like that happened, you should have said something! That's how you get it processed as a workplace injury, that's how the Association can do something to prevent it from happening again, that's why...!"
"Because I knew you'd react like this...?"
The Team Leader was, as a rule, a fairly quiet person. Soft-spoken. Kind.
But whenever I teased her about her age—or, occasionally, in moments like this—her reactions could get a little extra.
Of course, everyone had their moments... but this was the Team Leader we were talking about. I couldn't help feeling a little awkward.
"This is exactly why you should have told me! You're only twenty-one, acting like you're all grown up—and you're not even a combat-type Awakened...!"
"Hahaha..."
At the same time, I was freshly reminded that the Team Leader was an adult. I'd known she'd react like this, which was exactly why I hadn't told her, and a whole month had already gone by. Even so, I hadn't quite expected her to get this angry—or this worried—and I found myself at a loss.
"Haa... I've always thought you were a bit dense, but if something like that happened, you should have said something. Hmm? Twenty-one. That's the age when other kids are just going to college, laughing it up, having a drink. You know?"
"Haha..."
"If something like that happened—no, haa... Do you ever stop to think?"
"Hahaha..."
Trying to calmly rebut her point by point didn't seem wise, given that she was even angrier than I'd expected. I decided not to poke the bear.
I quietly ordered a cake from the owner... and had no choice but to sit there and take the Team Leader's lecture. Only after she'd run through every last scolding did I finally get a chance to explain myself.
Aside from getting knocked out by an electric shock during the kidnapping... nothing much had happened, right? I'd been grabbed and then released almost immediately. The only injury was a little chafing from the ropes, and after that I'd just gone home and rested comfortably with Saran. That was pretty much the end of it.
Yep, yep. It really wasn't a big deal.
"...Haa."
"You've already finished the whole cake. If you keep frowning like that, you're going to get wrinkles, you know? You're at the age where you have to start worrying about those."
"...Thirty isn't as... as you seem to think it is... No. Haa......"
"Hehe."
Still, I managed to smooth things over somehow. Between offering up a sweet cake as tribute and doing my best to explain—and soothe her at the same time—her frown finally started to ease.
She's thirty... If she keeps frowning and ends up with extra wrinkles, that'll be a problem, won't it? I suddenly felt rather proud of myself for looking after my boss like this.
"...Fine. So, what is it you wanted to hear?"
"Well... the protection for heroes seems a lot shoddier than I expected? I even thought about submitting a suggestion about it later. But I don't think that's necessary right now..."
"Then?"
"Things like what heroes who get retaliated against have in common... or what causes it. Could you tell me? It can't just be because they got caught, right? Generally speaking, the hero who took them down is stronger than the villain they subdued. Unless someone's an idiot, it'd be easier to just go commit another crime than to come running for revenge."
"Hmm..."
What I wanted to know was why these revenge attacks happened in the first place.
I'd met plenty of heroes by now, and I'd heard all sorts of stories along the way... but revenge cases like Saran's weren't all that common. Well, calling it "revenge" was a stretch—it'd just been some weirdo who wanted a one-on-one fight to avenge his boys.
Anyway. Now that I had three heroes under my care, I couldn't help starting to worry, little by little.
"Well... if you think about it simply, they wanted revenge badly enough to endure a stay in a rehabilitation facility. That might be the most ordinary reason?"
"I suppose so...?"
"The takedown process isn't exactly civilized, you know? It's not some tidy 'Hands up, don't move or I'll shoot!' situation. Everyone's fighting, bleeding, breaking bones. They're going to get angry in the process, feel humiliated... Well, it's not like they were doing anything legitimate when they got taken down in the first place."
"Mmm..."
So that was it, then? Analyzing a villain's thought process piece by piece was harder than I'd expected. Their way of thinking was just different.
Common sense said that if you did something wrong, you took your punishment. Villains, as a rule, didn't operate on common sense.
"Ah. And if there's another cause... it's that you can easily see heroes living well through the media."
"Ahh."
"It all comes down to something like an inferiority complex."
"Mmm..."
I see. Heroes being treated like public figures—like celebrities—was bound to be another reason they were exposed to that kind of risk.
"It doesn't happen all that often, generally speaking... hmm. Still, I think it doesn't hurt for heroes themselves to be careful. It's not like I never dealt with that kind of thing during my active years."
"A magical girl getting revenge taken on her and being forced to submit would be pretty erotic, yeah. Of course, our fresh-faced Magical Team Leader was so strong that something like that could never have happened."
"......"
The Team Leader shot me a look of utter disbelief at my wide-eyed, innocent reply.
And she had every reason to. Because the Team Leader... had actually been a magical girl.
Not "a girl who used magic"—her actual ability was Magical Girl, full stop. The words were even in her hero name.
"Hmm... it might be a little hard to call you a 'girl' these days."
"......"
As the conversation naturally veered into teasing the Team Leader, her face began to grow redder and redder. The last time I'd ribbed her, it had been more of an embarrassed-and-a-little-angry vibe than a blush... but this time, it was just straight-up embarrassment? Well... given what her ability was, and given what her age was.
"Magical girl. Thirty years old."
"...Please."
"Magical auntie...? That doesn't have the right ring to it... Ah, Magical MILF......?"
"Heyyy...!"
These days the Team Leader always dressed neatly in a suit—a pencil skirt and a blouse, nothing else—but back when she'd been active as a magical girl in her twenties, she'd always worn frilly, cute outfits.
Of course, even those had been sexier than the costumes from actual little-girls' magical girl anime—the kind kids actually watched. It had been less "cute" and more "pretty," with a distinctly sexy edge.
"Team Leader, next time you use your ability... could you show me?"
"I'm not showing you..."
"Aww."
"...Why are you the one looking dejected? Shouldn't that be me?"
"A cute, pretty thirty-year-old boss doing a magical girl cosplay would definitely be entertaining. And now I don't get to see that entertaining thing. Of course I'd be sad, wouldn't I?"
"......"
Well, it was all just teasing—all in good fun. After I'd ribbed her just enough, the conversation naturally shifted over to work.
Even with the Special Agent title attached to my name, I still couldn't completely get out of doing a little ordinary paperwork.