I'm Gonna Faint, For Real
'I'm gonna faint, for real. Not even a character figurine...'
Dizziness hit him all at once, and Baek Su-gyeong pressed a hand to his forehead. His mind felt muddled, hazy.
"You erected this three months ago?"
"Yes."
Kang Yu-pyeong looked puzzled. It was common knowledge that the Murim Alliance Leader, Jang Hyo-un, was a fervent fan of Wudang Sword Hero. Even the alliance elders carried pocket editions tucked in their robes—the book's popularity was off the charts. Not just the first print run; reprints sold out like hotcakes the moment they hit shelves. There was even a running joke that over ten cartloads of people were scrambling to snag even bootleg copies since Baekun Seogwan never had stock left. Of course, Baek Su-gyeong himself had no idea about any of that.
...This is making me dizzy.
After his stomach ulcers, now headaches too? He just wanted to live like a regular commoner, but the world wouldn't let him. Every time he tried to adjust, an even bigger wave crashed in, toppling his resolve. How was anyone supposed to adapt? Still, humans were adaptable creatures—at least the shock wasn't as bad as it used to be. Though it was still plenty shocking.
"A statue of Jin-un... I never imagined something like this. Quite the surprise."
Was this damn Murim world trying to embarrass him to death? Baek Su-gyeong swallowed a sigh and blinked hard.
"It's exquisitely crafted. The workmanship is no joke."
Deciding to let it go, he examined the statue of Jin-un closely and shared his honest impressions. If it weren't connected to him, he'd have been even more openly impressed. The smooth finish was hard to believe came from carved stone, brimming with such lifelike vitality it seemed ready to spring to life any second.
Kang Yu-pyeong smiled at the praise.
"The Alliance Leader would be overjoyed to hear that."
"Compared to the sculptures I saw working at the escort bureau—no, this one's even finer. Definitely not ordinary craftsmanship."
His time at Luoyang's Yongmun Escort Bureau wasn't for nothing. Baek Su-gyeong had risen from mere cargo hauler to quartermaster, appraiser—appraiser who judged an item's value and authenticity. He'd handled the expert identification of rare treasures, and after eight years in the Central Plains, he prided himself on having an eye for quality and fakes better than most.
"You can tell that much?"
"I worked at an escort bureau in Luoyang for a while."
"I had no idea."
Kang Yu-pyeong looked genuinely surprised. Baek Su-gyeong smiled and turned back to the statue. Once he accepted it, the exceptional skill stood out even more. To sculpt something this vividly alive from mere textual descriptions? No ordinary artisan could pull that off.
"If it's not too rude... could you tell me the name of the creator?"
"It was made personally by the Heavenly Craft Master Sa Il-un, great hero of the Heavenly Craft Sa Clan."
The answer came not from Kang Yu-pyeong, but another voice. Startled by the sudden interruption, Baek Su-gyeong whipped his head toward the sound and spotted a middle-aged man holding a folding fan. Behind him, Kang Yu-pyeong dropped to his knees.
"Strategist, sir!"
Baek Su-gyeong's face twisted oddly.
"Strategist? You mean the Murim Alliance Chief Strategist?"
The middle-aged man smiled and bowed politely.
"Jegal Yu here. To the rivers and lakes, I'm humbly known by the overly grand moniker Divine Wonder Recluse. You're Master Su-gyeong, I presume?"
Divine Wonder Recluse Jegal Yu. The Chief Strategist position effectively ran the alliance's major and minor affairs. He advised the Alliance Leader and shielded him from the endless political infighting. And here he was, courteously greeting Baek Su-gyeong.
"On behalf of the Murim Alliance, we welcome your visit."
"...I'm just a humble scholar. You're too kind."
Baek Su-gyeong's facial muscles twitched. Ever since starting Wudang Sword Hero, one overwhelming figure after another had barged into his life. Life really was unpredictable, even five minutes ahead. Wudang wasn't enough—now the Murim Alliance? He was getting tangled with the one group he absolutely shouldn't.
I barely know anything about the Jegal Clan yet...
Murim clans were basically local nobility. Local tyrants, powerful families—regional power blocs. Translate that to murim, and you got murim clans: knight-errant groups wielding massive influence in specific provinces. Though "knight-errant" was just a fancy term for thugs, really.
If only I hadn't fallen for that little convoy leader's words...
Too late for regrets now. The murim world was watching his pen like a hawk—what could he do? Baek Su-gyeong demurred humbly, and Jegal Yu chuckled.
"It wouldn't do to keep a distinguished guest in a place like this. Please, come to the reception hall. I hope Yu-pyeong didn't inconvenience you on the way?"
"Not at all."
Kang Yu-pyeong had bent over backward to make the trip comfortable. Baek Su-gyeong almost wanted to praise the effort. Though it was partly thanks to Wudang Sword Hero boosting his status, that very consideration weighed on him more.
Sudden environmental shifts took time to adjust to. And before you could, new changes hit—pure shock therapy. That was Baek Su-gyeong's exact situation.
"While you're in Xuchang, Yu-pyeong will attend to you."
"Understood. Looking forward to it, Great Hero Kang."
"The honor is mine."
Baek Su-gyeong felt a bit steadier. Better a familiar face from the journey than some total stranger as escort. Still burdensome, but manageable.
Jegal Yu smiled.
"You seemed startled by Great Hero Jin-un's statue..."
"Yes. Honestly, I was."
"Haha... His exploits are inspiring. Commemorating such valor with a statue is only fitting."
A fictional character, not even real. Baek Su-gyeong choked back the retort rising in his throat and forced a smile. This murim world was off its rocker. Or maybe it had never been sane to begin with.
"I never dreamed the Murim Alliance would have readers of my book."
Jegal Yu covered his mouth with his fan, chuckling softly.
"First editions of Wudang Sword Hero are like stars in the sky—impossible to snag. Even reprints are in short supply; folks are clamoring everywhere. Not just here in Xuchang."
"That popular?"
"I suspect you're undervaluing your own work, Master."
Baek Su-gyeong let out a hollow laugh. Sure, he'd stuffed it full of clichés, but it was still his baby. A middling author from the modern world who never hit it big? Undervaluing? He just wanted a clear-eyed view of reality.
In the modern world, it wouldn't have blown up like this.
Of course he was pleased, but by modern standards, it wasn't that great. He hadn't even written it to change murim. And before the joy could settle, unhandleable bigshots swarmed him—the confusion outweighed everything. He barely stifled a sigh.
Jegal Yu continued.
"That's why folks pay top dollar for bootlegs. Demand far outstrips supply. I couldn't snag my own five-volume set, so I borrowed from the elders."
"Even in the Murim Alliance..."
His head throbbed faintly—headache incoming. Baek Su-gyeong pressed his temples and shook his head.
Jegal Yu's amused voice tickled his ear.
"There's a joke going around Xuchang: ten cartloads wouldn't cover the number desperate for Wudang Sword Hero, bootlegs or not."
"...Scary."
Honest reaction. Jegal Yu's amusement deepened.
"A first-edition new volume? Name your price. Booksellers are fired up to hoard and resell them. Rumors say some tycoons collect only first-print Wudang Sword Hero volumes. One copy's worth its weight in gold."
"Books aren't gold bricks—how does that even make sense?"
"Paper's more available these days, but supply still lags demand. With prices that high, bootlegs thriving isn't surprising."
Eight years in the Central Plains, and Baek Su-gyeong had never felt paper shortages much. He'd always stocked up generously, paying premiums via So Ssaang-a for paper and books. Only possible after five years saving at the Yongmun Escort Bureau.
...Ah.
He realized it then. A modern holdover blind spot after eight years. The vast gap between modern and Central Plains paper. Machine mass-production versus limited handcraft. Paper was for officials and elites; even official docs got reused on the back. In the Song Dynasty, they sold waste paper to fund banquets—that expensive.
Jegal Yu said,
"Even if Gyeongun Merchant Group scrambles for paper and copyists to print editions, supply can't keep up."
"...Explains the bootlegs."
Baek Su-gyeong covered his forehead and shook his head. Even with So Ssaang-a's group all-in, paper costs were brutal. State-monopolized production, like salt. Modern mass-printing kept things cheap; not here.
Jegal Yu added,
"Wudang stepped in, and we helped wipe out a gang of them, but bootlegs still circulate widely."
"No rest for the weary."
"Blame your captivating writing, Master."
"Haha..."
Baek Su-gyeong mustered a weak smile. For a guy craving commoner life, headaches galore.
"Can't investigate every last one—it's a headache."
"My sympathies, Great Hero Jegal."
"Haha, your acknowledgment alone melts the fatigue."
Jegal Yu eyed him slyly. He'd worried about a sharp reaction to the statue amid bootleg issues, but none came.
Curious fellow.
Intelligence Division pegged Baek Su-gyeong as hypersensitive about his work—wall posters against bootlegs proved it. They'd concluded as much.
Did we prejudge?
Too hasty in judging him? Jegal Yu probed.
"I hope the statue didn't offend."
"Eh."
Baek Su-gyeong smirked, half-resigned.
"Truth be told, I've been half-accepting since heading here. Whatever happens, it wouldn't surprise me."
Hardened post-statue, but Jegal Yu couldn't know. He fanned himself lightly.
"I feared you were disheartened."
"Even if I was, what could I do? A powerless commoner against murim? A firefly before the full moon."
Jegal Yu smiled wryly. In under a year, one book had upended the Central Plains—but Baek Su-gyeong was undeniably just a regular rivers-and-lakes nobody. No murim ties, despite investigations. The alliance had dug too.
"Our oversight. My apologies, Master."
"It just shows how much they love Wudang Sword Hero. I'll take it that way."
Clear boundary. No intent to pick fights. Knew tangling with murim would only hurt him. Jegal Yu's eyes gleamed as he led the way.
Wise choice.
With rumors linking Haomen and Black Brush Party, unorthodox factions might snatch Baek away if they moved. Alliance brass like Jang Hyo-un wouldn't sit idle, though.
Chit-chat brought them swiftly to the reception hall. Seated in the tidy space, Jegal Yu said,
"Wait here; I'll fetch the Alliance Leader."
"Pardon? The Leader himself?"
Why that guy now? Baek Su-gyeong's face crumpled. Jegal Yu smiled gently, oblivious or not.
"Word of your arrival, and he'll sprint barefoot."
"He doesn't need to..."
"He's the Alliance master. You'll speak with him—I'll join, of course."
A crack formed on Baek Su-gyeong's forehead. An unwanted audience with the Murim Alliance Leader loomed.
I'm gonna faint, for real.