Stop It, You Crazy Bastards!
“May I ask for your opinion, sir? If it’s alright with you?”
At Jang Hyo-un’s words, Baek Su-gyeong’s face twisted into a familiar again? expression. No, you two sort it out yourselves. Why drag me into this every time?
Regardless of the look on his face, Baek Su-gyeong’s mouth was already moving. “I’m not sure my opinion is needed.”
“Share your esteemed wisdom with us.”
“You’re relying on Su-gyeong too much, Alliance Leader. Don’t torment him. We need his seal on volume 8 right now.”
“His seal? Are you coveting Teacher Su-gyeong’s personal autograph, something no one else has dared to claim, Lord?”
Why is the conversation veering off into this nonsense? Baek Su-gyeong pressed a hand to his forehead as he watched the two Absolutes bicker over such a pathetic topic.
The entire murim world filled with avid fans devouring his novels. It made his stomach churn for real. These weren’t even that well-written—yet even the Sword Venerable and Demon Venerable were utterly hooked.
As Baek Su-gyeong sank into self-deprecating thoughts, the two Absolutes turned to him.
“Teacher Su-gyeong!”
“Su-gyeong.”
Startled by the call, Baek Su-gyeong looked up. The two masters spoke.
“You decide for us, sir.”
“Su-gyeong, you choose.”
“Pardon?”
What am I supposed to decide? As he stared in bewilderment, Jegal Yu explained.
“They’re asking you to decide whether to establish diplomatic ties with the righteous murim or the Ilwol Church—and which one gets your personal seal, Teacher.”
Baek Su-gyeong’s face crumpled at Jegal Yu’s words, as if he’d been stung by a venomous needle. Deep anguish flickered behind that expression.
Why are you doing this to me…?
He swallowed the words he couldn’t voice, resignation settling in his eyes.
In the end, the agreement between the righteous factions and Ilwol Church was sealed.
With Baek Su-gyeong—the one man acknowledged across the heavens—as the witness, posters announcing the pact went up everywhere. It wasn’t just a truce to combat the Blood Church; mutual exchanges and an alliance between Ilwol Church and the righteous murim were proclaimed far and wide.
As a result, the isolated Evil Alliance became like a kite with its string cut, instantly ostracized.
Of course, neither Jang Hyo-un nor the Ilwol Lord cared a whit. They even seemed to have deliberately excluded them.
Given that Dark Shadow Assassins and Haomen had tangled with Baek Su-gyeong on bad terms, it was probably a gesture of consideration by leaving them out. A very likely possibility.
“…Then with this, the agreement is concluded.”
“Agreed.”
Jang Hyo-un and the Ilwol Lord each pressed their thumbs onto the freshly drawn-up accord, and Baek Su-gyeong added his seal as the primary witness. Jegal Yu joined him as co-witness, affixing his own seal. Thus was born a historic document bearing the thumbprints of the two Absolutes—one from the righteous side, one from Ilwol—and the signatures of the Murim Alliance’s Chief Strategist and the world’s most famous novelist.
A moment destined to etch itself into the annals of murim history.
“Now, Su-gyeong. As promised, add your personal seal to mine.”
“I come first, Lord.”
“Mind your dignity, Alliance Leader. Does the title Thousand Hands Sword Venerable mean nothing to you?”
“Your Moon Demon Venerable title isn’t living up to its name, Lord.”
Baek Su-gyeong sighed as he watched the two bicker like children again. Absolutes everyone knew, fighting over a mere autograph. Not kids, for heaven’s sake.
“Alliance Leader, Lord. Enough already. My head’s spinning.”
“Put your hands… right now!”
“Don’t you dare! Call a physician! The Teacher has a headache!”
“Stop! That’s far enough!!”
What am I going to do with these over-immersed maniacs?
Baek Su-gyeong barely quelled the impending chaos with a single shout and extended his hand to the pair.
“Bring one volume each. Both of you. I’ll sign them fairly, but if you fight over the order, I’ll quit writing altogether.”
The ultimate threat from a writer. Keep this up, and I stop writing.
Both Jang Hyo-un and the Ilwol Lord grimaced at his words.
“Don’t say such things, Su-gyeong. You didn’t mean it, right?”
“You know how immense your influence is on murim, Teacher. Please refrain from such talk.”
“That’s why I’m telling you to stop fighting.”
At Baek Su-gyeong’s firm declaration, an unspoken accord passed between the Ilwol Lord and Jang Hyo-un. Nodding, they each drew Wudang Sword Hero from their robes.
Both had brought the brand-new volume 10 first editions.
“First-print volume 10. I went to great lengths to obtain it, thinking I’d meet you.”
“The same for me. With your seal on a first edition, Su-gyeong, it’d be a treasure beyond compare.”
A first-print copy with Baek Su-gyeong’s personal autograph? In the current murim, where his status was colossal, it would be a priceless heirloom worthy of passing down generations. And Baek Su-gyeong wasn’t the type to autograph freely anyway.
Sighing, Baek Su-gyeong took the books and scrawled his name in cursive script on the inside cover of each.
If these were originals, their value would skyrocket.
But he’d left the original volumes 9 and 10 with Yongmun Escort Bureau. He couldn’t carry them everywhere.
Winning favor from the pinnacles of the righteous factions and Ilwol by signing two books seemed like a bargain… but he didn’t feel that way.
“Add ‘To Jang Hyo-un’ as well, if you would, Teacher.”
“Of course.”
“Me too. And if possible, on my battle robe as well.”
“Sneaky! If you’re doing it, mine too, Teacher!”
Can’t you skip competing over even this petty shit, you bastards?
Feeling curses bubbling up from deep inside, Baek Su-gyeong finished the autographs.
He handed back the signed books and robes, then rose to leave—
“Alliance Leader.”
“What is it, Lord?”
“Now that we’ve established diplomatic ties, perhaps we should consider building a facility like the Divine Dragon Pavilion from Wudang Sword Hero. What do you think?”
Jang Hyo-un pondered briefly at the Ilwol Lord’s suggestion, then nodded approvingly.
“A fine idea. An educational institution representing both demonic and righteous paths—and a lasting symbol of our pact—would be excellent.”
“We see eye to eye. What a coincidence.”
“Indeed.”
Grinning broadly at whatever mutual understanding they’d reached, the two Absolutes burst into hearty laughter. Baek Su-gyeong averted his gaze.
Staying here any longer might really punch a hole through his stomach.
“Discuss that between yourselves. I’ll be heading out.”
“Teacher?”
“Su-gyeong.”
Ignoring their stares, Baek Su-gyeong left without a backward glance.
“Su-gyeong’s running away!”
“Teacher! Where are you going?!”
Wiping away tears as their voices chased him down the hall, Baek Su-gyeong prayed. Damn you, heavens—please just drop dead.
“Uwaaaah!!”
Stop it, you crazy bastards!
Having endured brutal torment from history’s most die-hard superfans, Baek Su-gyeong spent the rest of the day resting.
“How’s the Pavilion Lord doing?”
“He’s sleeping. Must be exhausted…”
So Ssaang-a nodded at Namgung So-min’s words. After dealing with two Absolutes, it’d be weirder if he wasn’t wiped out.
Even So Ssaang-a herself had suffered debilitating fatigue for three days straight after facing off with the Ilwol Lord. Looking back now, it was a miracle she’d withstood his demonic qi at all.
“He must be exhausted. Meeting alone with Thousand Hands Sword Venerable Jang, one of the era’s top warriors, and the demonic Absolute, Ilwol Lord…”
“Have you found any trace of Lady Gal?”
So Ssaang-a shook her head at Namgung So-min’s question. Even if Gyeongun Merchant Group was booming, tracking Haomen when they were dead set on hiding was no easy feat.
They’d mobilized one of murim’s three great intelligence networks, but since they weren’t specialists in training spies, there was a limit.
“No leads. We only know it’s Haomen…”
“Lady Gal not returning must be because of that.”
So Ssaang-a nodded reluctantly at Namgung So-min’s words. Baek Su-gyeong and she had both suffered from the Black Books before. Black Brush Party still plagued the central plains, circulating those damn things whenever they got the chance to threaten Gyeongun Merchant Group.
Rumors swirled that Haomen was behind it, and even the near-kidnapping of Baek Su-gyeong in Xuchang was whispered to be at their instigation.
Neither So Ssaang-a nor Baek Su-gyeong could view Haomen favorably.
“To go so far as faking the identity of Heavenly King Society Leader’s daughter just to stay by Teacher’s side…”
“…I’m no warrior, so I wouldn’t know.”
So Ssaang-a ran her fingers over the desk with a bitter expression. The white tips felt stained with indelible traces of time.
“But it’s clear they planted someone from Haomen by Pavilion Lord’s side no matter what. That bothers me. What exactly is Haomen scheming?”
“Old murim’s Haomen was always neutral between righteous and demonic. Trading with anyone. Maybe their goal is to drag the shadows-dwelling Haomen back into the light…”
Namgung So-min continued. “That’s what I think.”
“Haomen into the light…? Hard to picture.”
“Unlike Beggar Clan, Haomen’s a shadow intelligence sect. Even among the Ten Evil Fringes, they have the worst reputation—seen as the weakest.”
The Ten Evil Fringes. Like the Nine Great Righteous Clans and Eight Great Schools, they were longstanding powerhouse factions.
Haomen’s inclusion owed more to their superior intelligence-gathering over Beggar Clan than any martial might—and that was common knowledge.
Rumor had it that even among evil warriors, Haomen members were openly scorned.
Perhaps their aim was to pull Haomen into the open, transforming it from an info-focused group into a true martial sect.
So Ssaang-a’s brows furrowed slightly at Namgung So-min’s analysis.
“If they chose Pavilion Lord as the means…”
“If this speculation holds true, then Haomen used Teacher for their sect’s advancement.”
A blade-sharp chill, cold as steel, settled on Namgung So-min’s face.
“In that case, I absolutely cannot forgive them.”