Chapter 11: Cecily(2)
Chapter 11: Cecily(2)
Demons.
A race possessing the horns and red eyes that symbolize their devil ancestry, along with the ability to wield black mana.
Three thousand years ago, when devils brought the world to the brink of ruin, they committed indiscriminate atrocities against all races to satisfy their depraved desires.
They horrified the world with murder and rape, as well as human experimentation and countless other unspeakable acts.
Demons were born through these horrific circumstances—some were the result of pregnancies forced by devils, while others were mutants transformed by mana injected during human experiments. Curiously, only humans were ever turned into demons.
Many theories were proposed as to why this affected only humans, rather than elves, dwarves, or beastkin. The most prominent hypothesis centered on the unique nature of "humanity" itself.
Humans have shorter lifespans than other races and are naturally physically weaker. In exchange, they possess an incredible "learning ability." The theory suggested that this adaptability had worked against them. Furthermore, because humans are beings where "light" and "darkness" are more distinct than in any other race, they were able to absorb the seed of the devil more deeply.
[Beings who will one day turn into devils.]
[They pretend to be human, but devil blood flows through their veins.]
[They must be eradicated.]
However, other races, including humans, did not view demons as victims or as "human." They branded them as "devils." It was easy to justify their exclusion; after all, if a demon failed to control their rage or succumbed to their desires, they would lose their reason and truly become a devil.
The Holy Nation "Savior" even went so far as to carry out an unprecedented massacre of demons under the pretext of purging the "seeds of the devil." From Savior’s perspective, devils were beings who not only denied God but attempted to overthrow Him. Thus, the hardliners and moderates within the church set aside their differences and joined forces in the slaughter.
Following this madness-fueled catastrophe, the demons split into two factions.
One faction consisted of those who truly became "devils," seeking revenge against the world. The other consisted of those who sought "restraint," choosing to live as "humans." Before long, the faction that became devils was completely wiped out, vanishing from the world.
So, what happened to the remaining faction—the demons who sought restraint and wished to be human?
While Savior and other great powers were embroiled in wars over ideological differences, the demons seeking restraint seized the opportunity to found the nation of Helium. Naturally, most countries refused to recognize Helium, but the demons, having honed their strength through discipline, were formidable.
They were so powerful that any nation attempting to invade them would suffer such heavy losses that they would be left vulnerable to other enemies. Consequently, the world decided to wait for an opportunity to deal with them later.
The irony was that over a thousand years had passed since that decision was made.
Yet, throughout that time, discrimination against demons never faded. Humans weren't the only ones who hated them.
It seemed the demons' long-cherished wish would never be fulfilled.
Until a certain book appeared in the world.
*
Born as the princess of Helium and the daughter of the Demon King, a thought often occurred to me.
Why are we demons discriminated against by other races? We look no different from humans on the outside, so why must we live under such harsh treatment?
Above all, why must we strive to live as "humans" and not as any other race?
Most demons are born in Helium and die in Helium. One might call us frogs in a well, but those who ventured outside usually met with tragedy.
Losing a loved one or being betrayed by someone precious—leading to "demonization"—was common. Many returned to Helium after suffering discrimination too terrible to speak of.
The worst cases were those who were murdered on sight, treated as devils without question. Outside Helium, being killed simply for being a demon was a frequent occurrence.
"Father. Father."
"Yes? What is it, dear?"
"Why do we have to live like humans?"
The year I turned twenty.
I asked the King of Helium—my father. I asked if it was truly necessary for us to live like humans.
Father looked surprised for a moment before a smile that bordered on a bitter smirk touched his lips. He reached out and gently stroked my hair with his thick, calloused hand.
"Cecile. Do you know how our race first came into this world?"
"I know that devils committed terrible things against people, and that's how demons were born. And that only humans became demons."
"Correct. Originally, our ancestors were human. Even now, we are closer to humans than any other race. Therefore, we must live like humans so that we may one day be treated as people."
"But we don't necessarily have to live like humans now, do we? Can't we just live as demons?"
At my questioning, Father’s smile deepened. He knelt slightly to meet my eyes.
As if to remind me of our nature, my own face was reflected in his blood-red pupils. Father stared into my eyes for a long time before lightly gripping my shoulders and giving an answer I couldn't understand at the time.
"That is what it means to be a demon, Cecile."
"..."
"You might not understand now, but the day will come when you understand your father's words. That realization will surely be a great help in your life, so never forget it. Understood?"
"...I understand."
I couldn't grasp the meaning of my father's words even eighty years later. I thought I never would.
Until the book that turned the lives of demons upside down was published. I was certain that the lesson contained within that book was the realization my father had mentioned.
But Father shook his head and said no.
"Cecile. That book certainly exposed the tragedy of our race and changed our lives. But it is not the 'identity' of the demons I was speaking of."
Then what is it? How does Father define us?
I carried that question in my heart even as I enrolled in Halo Academy. I prayed that I might find the answer in human society, where I had stepped for the first time.
And yet...
"No."
Why would you, who aren't even a demon...
"Demons cannot become human."
...dare to say such a thing?
I froze in my tracks on the way to the cafeteria and stared at the human man in front of me. A man with striking red hair and golden eyes that stood out even from a distance.
His features were delicate—"pretty" suited him better than "handsome"—and his slender build gave him an androgynous aura. He was pretty enough that if a girl dressed as a man, people would believe it without a second thought.
...Why?
My mouth felt bitter, as if I’d swallowed medicine. But curiosity was the first thing to dominate my mind.
He was a human I had been interested in since the incident with Professor Megner. The man who had argued that it wasn't demons who were dangerous, but mages themselves who wielded magic.
Coincidentally, Lina—the first human I had befriended and the Imperial Princess of the Minerva Empire—also showed a deep interest in him, so we naturally became closer. However, I rarely had the chance to speak with him one-on-one.
Through the conversation we were having now, I realized he was a remarkably considerate person. I had felt it before, but every word he spoke seemed to linger in my mind.
Just like now.
"...Mr. Isaac."
"Yes, Lady Cecile."
"Do you realize there is a contradiction in your answer?"
The red-haired man, Isaac, had said just moments ago that I looked human to him. That I didn't look like a devil at all.
Yet, he had just said that demons cannot become human. It was undeniably contradictory.
While I was preoccupied trying to decipher the meaning behind his words, Isaac blinked a few times before speaking.
"Lady Cecile."
"Go on."
"Have you ever heard a human say they want to become human?"
"Pardon?"
What a random thing to say. I looked at him with a puzzled expression and shook my head.
I didn't know what Isaac was trying to get at, but I knew it was best to listen quietly. His words often carried profound weight.
When I shook my head, Isaac fell silent for a moment before speaking in a calm, flat voice.
"You have likely never heard it, and you never will. Because humans are human from the moment they are born. Demons are born as demons, so they must live as demons."
"Then let me ask you again. What does it mean to 'live like a demon' in your opinion? We have constantly strived to live like humans. And we will continue to do so."
Like Sacran, who sacrificed himself in the Xenon Biography, most demons long to live as humans. We want to mingle with people like ordinary humans—laughing, chatting, and enjoying ourselves.
That is the desire of the demons who seek restraint; it is our most noble destiny. That is what I had believed until now.
Until a year ago, I had only thought about it without putting it into practice, but thanks to the Xenon Biography, I seized the opportunity. I never wanted to let that opportunity go.
But Isaac, seemingly oblivious to my feelings, maintained his relaxed attitude as he answered.
"Yes. That is what I consider a demon to be, Princess of Helium."
"...So what exactly is that? Everything you say is full of contradictions."
I was starting to get annoyed. I wondered if he was making fun of me.
I didn't know why the eloquence he used to humiliate Professor Megner was being directed at me now, but I felt like I was about to burst from frustration.
I waited for Isaac to speak. But he showed no sign of opening his mouth.
I was just about to turn my back on him, unable to take it anymore.
"Beings who can become the brightest light, but also the most hideous darkness."
"...What?"
His heavy silence broke, and words that couldn't be easily dismissed flowed out.
Just as I was becoming dazed by his words, Isaac spoke again.
"A race that knows they can never be human, yet yearns for it so desperately—a race more human than humans themselves."
"..."
Ah. I see.
"That is what I believe a demon is, and I believe that is how a demon lives 'humanely,' Lady Cecile."
So this is what Father meant.
Demons know better than anyone that they can never truly be human. Yet, they desire it more fervently than anyone else.
Therefore, as long as they do not become devils, demons cannot help but be more human than humans. Since humans are born human, they have no inherent desire to "become" human.
Demons can truly become devils, but conversely, they can become the most human of all races.
While I was lost in thought, Isaac shrugged nonchalantly and continued in his usual calm voice.
"Well... it's not just demons; other races probably don't know what they are either. In the end, it's people who judge other people. Please just take what I said as my personal opinion."
"..."
"Lady Cecile?"
"Yes? Oh, yes. I heard you. Thank you."
I snapped out of it at Isaac's call. He gave me a bright smile once he saw I was back with him. I stared at his smile with a dazed look.
That smile was truly... it sparkled as brilliantly as the sun in a blue sky. It felt more beautiful than any jewel.
So much so that I wanted to reach out, capture it, and keep it forever.
"Shall we go eat now?"
To his question, I replied not with a playful smirk, but with a smile from the bottom of my heart.
"Alright. Let's go."
"Huh? Suddenly using casual speech..."
"Never mind that. I'm older than you anyway, aren't I? Lina speaks casually to you, so it shouldn't matter."
"Uh... I suppose it doesn't."
It wasn't just my imagination that dinner tasted better than usual that day.
*
After a pleasant dinner with Cecile, I returned straight to my dormitory without incident. Cecile had left first, saying she had something she needed to think about.
By the way, I've definitely heard those words somewhere before...
No matter how much I thought about it, the things I said to Cecile felt familiar. If I wasn't mistaken, I had heard them recently, but the memory of where was fuzzy.
It was only after I returned to my room and checked my manuscript for editing that it hit me.
"Holy shit..."
The moment I checked the manuscript, I couldn't help but swear out loud. My face contorted into a grimace.
Because...
"I was the one who wrote that."
The advice I had given Cecile was written right there in my manuscript, word for word.