Awakening Madness (3)
The bald man’s desperate shout echoed through the room.
They’re just handing over the stolen goods? For a second I wondered if that was even allowed, but after thinking about it, I realized some of the victims had already sold their ownership rights for cash. Since the Transport Guild bought those goods with money, they now held legitimate title even if the original owners couldn’t reclaim them. Offering them as payment wasn’t a problem at all.
‘Well, if they’re throwing in extra money, there’s no reason to refuse.’
I gestured for the overly dramatic bald representative to stand up.
“Please rise. Even if we locate their hideout, there’s a chance I won’t be able to eliminate them alone.”
If the bandit group turned out to be a brigade of twelve Gold Class wanted criminals, I planned to drop the whole thing without hesitation. I’d report the location to the guild, but risking my life over some reusable research papers would be pure insanity.
“Finding their den is all we need! Our guild will dispatch a subjugation team, and we will definitely compensate you properly!”
The bald representative even drew up a written agreement as he spoke. It was a legally binding document, just like the request forms submitted to the Adventurer Guild. Since I was hiding my identity, we agreed the payment would go to “the one who eliminated the bandits.” With this paper in hand, they couldn’t back out later even if they tried. Looked like an unexpected side income was coming my way. Of course, it wouldn’t count toward Nord the adventurer’s record.
“Mister Wayne. I’ve gathered information from the Audumla Guild.”
As I tucked away the agreement, Tirsi returned from her own investigation.
“There were survivor testimonies. The bandit group seems to number between fifteen and twenty. Their individual combat strength wasn’t particularly impressive, even including the one who appears to be their leader. At best, they’re considered below Bronze Class.”
“Who provided the testimony?”
“A Bronze Class adventurer from the Gilpy Guild. I heard he’s also affiliated with the Mage Guild.”
“Then it’s reliable.”
Unlike the thug-heavy Sekhmet or the pathetic little startup Audumla, the Gilpy Guild was a large-scale enterprise. Their membership standards were high—they started at the minimum Bronze Class and required thorough background checks and interviews. Testimony from someone belonging to both that guild and the Mage Guild carried serious weight. We didn’t have to worry about some spy from the bandits who had infiltrated the Adventurer Guild to spread false information.
“The Transport Guild is also offering ten silver coins as reward along with ownership rights to some of the stolen goods.”
After listening to her report, I explained the full compensation details to Tirsi. Ten silver was a lot of money, but trying to secretly skim any of it would definitely cause trouble later. The Transport Guild might even rat me out to Tirsi if I tried to pocket extra. Better to just speak honestly.
“How should we split the success payment?”
“What if you take seven and I take three?”
“Are you sure? I won’t refuse.”
When I asked to make sure she wouldn’t have second thoughts, Tirsi nodded firmly.
“It’s fine. Of course I have financial desires, but I couldn’t even begin this without you.”
“Good. Then it’s settled.”
A dramatic compromise achieved. Fuck yes. Seven silver is pure honey.
“We’ll both need to prepare. How long until we meet again?”
Tirsi had come out wearing only her lab coat and a self-defense wand. There was no way she could head into a combat zone dressed like that. I was in the same situation with just my robe and mask.
“Two hours… no, give me one hour. I’ll bring the potions I made and clothes to hide my identity.”
“Understood. The damaged area is near the northern mountains, so I’ll wait for you in front of the north gate.”
“Alright.”
After deciding on the meeting place, we temporarily split up to prepare. On the way to the north gate, I stopped by Franc’s place, explained the situation, and borrowed one of her weapons. Tirsi had already seen my sword, so I couldn’t bring it. The armor could stay hidden under the robe, though, so that was fine.
‘I don’t really need a weapon anyway.’
In front of an Earth hero’s strength, weapons weren’t essential. Franc’s weapon was a comfortable hammer, and if I beat up a few bandits I could just steal theirs.
While Franc helped me put on my gear, she spoke up.
“Nord. I want something.”
“What is it?”
“A mask to hide my face and some equipment.”
Squeeze─ She tightened the straps on my leg guards with surprising force. Right now Franc was helping me change back into Arthur Wayne in a nearby alley. I had returned to my Nord identity first so I could explain the situation to her at the inn. But I could hear a hint of dissatisfaction in her voice.
“Franc…? Are you angry?”
“I’m not angry, but I don’t like sending you off alone. From now on, I think I need something to hide my identity too, just in case.”
She seemed worried about not being able to go with me. She wasn’t telling me not to go because she respected my decisions.
“Sorry to say this, but… with your height and build, hiding just your face probably won’t mean much, right?”
“………I can wrap myself in bandages and wear platform shoes. Probably.”
“Really? We can test it when I get back.”
Since she was that determined, trying it once didn’t seem like a bad idea. After securing all my equipment except for weapons, I kissed Franc on the cheek.
“I’ll come back without getting hurt. I’ll be back before sunrise, so don’t worry.”
“Idiot. How can I not worry?”
Franc pouted. I had no good response, so I simply hugged her. She wrapped her arms around my neck for a moment before stepping out of my embrace.
“Hurry back. If it gets dangerous, you must run away.”
“Got it. I’ll make good use of the weapon.”
I pulled the mask over my face and ran toward the meeting spot. I waited in front of the north gate, and before long a woman in a robe appeared. She carried a bag over one shoulder.
“Mister Wayne. It’s me.”
Her face was completely hidden by her hood and scarf, and even her voice sounded different. But when she pulled down the scarf to reveal her eyes, they were the sky-blue color I knew well.
“You’re here. What should I call you?”
“A pseudonym? Let’s go with ‘Ash.’”
It was the name of a famous historical figure from Romania. That country had many female names ending in “si,” so it would be hard to trace.
“Understood. Then, Ash, let’s go.”
“Hehe. Even though it’s a fake name, you’re already dropping the honorifics?”
“It’s better this way when hiding our identities. Will you call me Arthur as well?”
“I will, Arthur.”
After exchanging names, we left through the north gate. Thanks to the identification papers we used to conceal our real identities, the inspection passed without issue. Once outside the gate, we headed toward the nearby mountain where the hideout was likely located. All three attacks had occurred in the plains surrounding the mountain. Even the bandits who made their own children pickpocket to pay tribute would care about a safe place to eat and sleep. To avoid being spotted and killed by patrols, they would almost certainly have built their hideout in a cave deep in these mountains. Anyone smart enough to think of another method wouldn’t be running a bandit group—they’d be leading a proper mercenary company.
“Arthur. Isn’t it about time you told me about that ‘method’ of yours?”
Once we were climbing the mountain path and away from prying eyes, Tirsi finally asked. She must have held back earlier because of people around us in the city.
“Alright. No need to drag it out—let’s begin right away.”
As I answered, I looked up at a nearby tree. A wild bird that didn’t even try to flee at the sight of humans was perched on a branch, staring at us.
‘Perfect timing. There’s one right here.’
I took out the bread I had brought in my bag. Based on past experience, I had chosen rye bread. There wasn’t a single bird in this other world that didn’t lose its mind over the stuff.
“Choo-choo? (Food?)”
The nameless bird reacted to the rye bread. Confirming its interest, I carefully spoke using Vector-Bird Language.
“Tweet-tz? (Hello?)”
The method for finding the bandits’ den was an application of my translation ability that I had secretly used with great success since my days at Carmine University. Nord’s naming: the Great Live Drone Operation.
“Twee-ack tweet-chung? (A human is speaking our language?)”
The birdbrain that had been focused on the bread now turned its interest toward me. These guys really had low intelligence. It was a good thing Tirsi couldn’t understand what I was saying. From here on, the conversation was going to be extremely childish.
“Tzu-tzu tweet. (I have a favor to ask.)”
Still, trying to sound serious and imposing while going “tweet tweet” was so embarrassing I wanted to die, even if the bird couldn’t understand the meaning. I didn’t even want to imagine what kind of face Tirsi was making behind me.
“Tzu-tzu? Tzee-chk? (Favor? What is it?)”
“Twee-ack tzu-tweet. (Find some humans for me.)”
I tore off a piece of bread and held it out. The bird eyed me warily before flying over and landing on my arm. Up close, it was bigger than I expected. But why the hell was this damn bird gripping my arm so tightly with its claws?
“Chuck-chuck-chuck! Chuck-chuck-chuck! (Delicious! Delicious!)”
After tasting the rye bread, the birdbrain immediately turned its head toward the big loaf. Its intelligence was clearly bottom-tier. I pulled the bread behind my back and growled softly.
“Tzu-tzu-tweet-chup chick-tweet-tweet. (If you do the favor, I’ll give it to you.)”
“Twee-ack tzu-tzee? (Find humans?)”
“Tweet. Chi-tweet-tzu-tzu tzu-tweet. (Yes. A place where many humans gather.)”
“Tzee-eck chat-tweet! (That way!)”
The bird pointed its beak in the direction of Sargadis. Not there, you stupid birdbrain.
“Tzu-chk-tweet tweet-chk-chk? Tzu-tzee-tweet-tweet chk chick-tweet-tweet. (Don’t you know any other places? If you find one, I’ll give you this too.)”
To raise the reward, I pulled out another loaf from my bag. I had cut a ridiculously large bread that cost one copper into three pieces just for this. It would probably feed these birds for days.
“Chat-tzu-chk! (I’ll look!)”
The bird excitedly kicked off my arm and flew away. Enthusiasm was good, but I didn’t expect it to actually find the bandit hideout and come back. I planned to keep searching the area anyway.
‘Fuck. There are bird footprints left on my arm.’
Apparently birds that drink blood live the longest, while birds that drink bread live the most pathetically. I brushed the dirt off my clothes and turned to Tirsi. Honestly, explaining the situation from here on was already making me feel exhausted.
But when Tirsi lowered her scarf, she was wearing a bright, excited expression.
“Arthur! Was that the Animal Conversation magic just now?!”
“Huh?”
Fuck, what the hell is Animal Conversation magic? I had been planning to bullshit something about mysterious Kitai sorcery. Whatever. Let’s just go with that. From now on, I was Druid Noru the Beast Master.
“S-similar.”
“I see! If you can use Animal Conversation, finding the bandits’ hideout will be easy! Every animal on this mountain can become our witness!”
My bewildered expression was hidden by the mask, so Tirsi reached her own conclusion. The process was wrong, but the conclusion was right, so it was hard to respond. Just as she predicted. Back during my slave days when we camped during ruin explorations, I had gotten lost while gathering firewood. I managed to return to camp using this very method.
‘One piece of bread turned into a navigation system. It was convenient.’
I had used it a few more times after that and even got caught by the adventurers I hired, but when I bullshitted that it was “Unbelievable☆ Magic from the New Continent of Kitai,” they all bought it. People in this world tended to have strange fantasies about Kitai. It was similar to how, before modernization, many Westerners on Earth believed Asians had superpowers. It was famous that one of Knox’s Ten Commandments—“Never include Chinese people”—existed because Westerners at the time viewed Chinese people as oriental magicians.
‘I was planning to channel the vibe of Kung Fu Master Kimchi Ninja Kang Buk-ho and spout some martial arts-style lines this time too.’
Anyway, since it worked, that was fine. As I sighed in relief beneath my mask, Tirsi smiled and continued.
“You must visit this mountain often to synchronize with the animals you’ve successfully conversed with using Animal Conversation.”
“Huh? W-well, something like that?”
“Hehe. I can only be impressed. Since you’ve already built affinity with the animals on this mountain in advance, there probably isn’t a single person in this area who can escape your information network, Arthur.”
Huh? Did Animal Conversation magic require prior preparation? Our otherworldly Papago didn’t need any of that annoying process. Fuck. So my translation ability really was a bit different from normal magic.
‘Good thing I didn’t pretend to know too much.’
If she had asked me to teach her the Kitai magic formula, I would have had a hard time dodging the question.
“By the way, I had no idea. You’re not only an expert in archaeology but also quite knowledgeable in magic?”
Tirsi’s eyes sparkled as she spoke.
“Is that why you were able to use Beast Regression magic?”
This was that look. The kind of gaze a middle schooler gives a Seoul National University student… or more accurately, the sparkling eyes of an elementary kid watching a pro gamer. Feeling the pressure, I cleared my throat.
“Ahem. I don’t know about other magic, but I do have some insight into a few spells, including Animal Conversation. Anyway, let’s keep moving. I need to ask the other animals as well.”
“Yes! What other animals will you speak with?”
“You’ll… see when we get there. Hahaha!”
And so we wandered the mountain, attempting to negotiate with every animal we encountered.
“Chik-tzu-tzu chik-chup? (Want walnuts?)”
“Chiiik!! (Mine!!)”
“Siii. Sisiik! (Want chicken?)”
“Sssit?? Shat shishaa? (What are you?? Are you a lizardman?)”
“Grrrrr!! Bark bark!! (Human!! Gonna eat!!)”
“Kang. (Ah fuck, just stop.)”
There was one incident where a wild hyena got cocky and I had to kick it away, but overall the negotiations went smoothly. Don’t underestimate the experience of a Master Druid. As long as they weren’t monsters whose heads only contained “eat” and “kill,” normal conversation was possible. Though there were many failures due to vastly different cultures and ways of thinking.
After repeating this for dozens of minutes, an animal finally gave us the answer we wanted.
“Kik kiiiii kikik! (Human pack there!)”
It was a sharp bird resembling a kite. Its mind was completely occupied with the chicken as it spoke.
“Kik kikik kiiiiiii, kiiit!! (Human cave, that way!!)”
“Kii-o eeeeeeet. (Guide us.)”
“Kikkik kieeeeeeeek!! (Humans, follow me!!)”
I threw it a handful of chicken and ordered it to lead the way. Tirsi followed behind, muttering in a dazed voice.
“H-how many animals have you tamed exactly?”
“I’d have to check the receipts.”
I had been casting the spell on every animal that caught my eye, so even I wasn’t sure. Incidentally, when the wild dog attacked earlier, Tirsi seemed to have interpreted it as a taming spell wearing off. As expected, sometimes smart people were easier to fool.
“Kik!! (Humans!!)”
─Rustle!
Following the kite’s guidance, we discovered a narrow cave. There were no guards. However, there were traces of dirt clumsily scattered near the entrance. It was clearly the work of humans. They had probably tried to erase their footprints when entering and exiting. The lack of a guard at the entrance was likely to avoid detection. A sentry would be noticeable from a distance, and if eyewitness accounts spread, the location would be exposed.
Tirsi gripped her wand tightly and whispered.
“We found it.”