The Cannibal's Last Dream
The ogre, eyes closed and deep in slumber, snored loudly. Red Sun.
—Thwack!
Fuck, it really does look like an angel that’s devoured hundreds of people. My hand almost moved on instinct to snap its neck. Why the hell do these monster bastards always have to wear their rotten personalities right on their ugly faces?
I clicked my tongue and sat down beside the ogre’s head.
“Relax… Just relax…”
What the hell is ‘relax’…?
“I said loosen up, you dumbass.”
This guy is seriously brain-dead.
“Ahem. Now, Your Majesty… Your dream has come true… This is the kingdom you built…”
Kingdom…? Ooooh…! My kingdom…!!
“That’s right… This is your utopia… I am the one you summoned to spread your great achievements…”
Is that so… What is your name…?
“I am called Bogal…”
Bogal… Listen well to my deeds…
The ogre straightened its posture as if it were actually sitting on a throne. This bastard really is an idiot. Just because someone’s smart doesn’t mean they can’t be a complete moron. I’ve learned something new today.
Anyway, the ogre began to recite its dogshit philosophy.
I was chosen by fate… As the ruler of the Oghas who shall rebuild a fallen civilization and drive the inferior races from my territory… I prepared for a grand plan that would last a hundred years…
“As expected of Your Majesty… But when you first set out, there were no other ogres as wise as you… Am I correct in that understanding…?”
I started with the most important question. If bastards like this were secretly operating all over Britannia, we’d be in serious trouble.
Fortunately, the ogre’s answer was closer to a firm NO.
Indeed… I was the only one who preserved my intellect within the limits of this flesh… Therefore, I reclaimed my territory and bestowed wisdom upon my subjects… That was the duty of the superior race that first regained its intellect…
Bestowed wisdom upon its subjects?
I exchanged glances with my party members. This seemed worth digging into deeper.
“Your Majesty… When you say you bestowed wisdom… what exactly do you mean…?”
Write it down exactly as I say it, Bogal… A mere scribe like you need only remember my words without forgetting…
“You fucking prick…”
Even in its dream, this bastard was acting like some shitty professor throwing its weight around. Apparently its entire “Lab Kingdom” was nothing but a power-trip background setting.
As I ground my teeth, Veronica explained.
“So it’s unconsciously dodging?”
Veronica tilted her head in confusion. Ah, shit. Psychology doesn’t exist in this world. I told her it was nothing and reactivated the Wind-Tunnel Hypnosis app.
But damn, thinking about it suddenly pisses me off.
Why the hell was I hypnotizing a male ogre that was a whole meter taller than me instead of a woman? If I used this on Dana, I could make her give me a nice big pair of—
I almost got hit with a sudden wave of self-loathing, but I endured it with superhuman patience.
“Your Majesty… What exactly did you do in the Forest of the Holy Water…?”
The forest… That’s right… I obtained a method to steal power from the inferior races and offer it to the gods… The Wicker Man ritual I saw in the memories passed down by the Jade Seal…
“What is this… Wicker Man…?”
I’d heard the term before, so I asked anyway. It might be different from what I knew.
Kuhahaha… If you are truly a subject of my kingdom, you should already know… It is a ritual that uses inferior races as sacrifices to gain power… It was quite enjoyable to reveal the truth to those fools who believed they had been chosen…
“…So it was preparing a human sacrifice ritual,” Tirsi said, sounding thoroughly creeped out.
I agreed. To this cannibal monster, offering a pig’s head on an altar probably felt about the same. But as the representative of humanity’s superiority complex, I felt a burning rage toward the bastard.
“With the Wicker Man ritual… what exactly were you trying to accomplish…?”
That is none of your concern…
Tch. Looked like this was another question that triggered a strong rejection response.
Well, the plans of a dead bastard aren’t really my business anyway.
I continued exchanging questions with my party members, milking information out of the ogre. There were some questions it fiercely refused, but many others it answered gladly.
What we learned could be divided into three main points.
First, this ogre had once been an ordinary monster. The day it received a “revelation” or “memory” from the Jade Seal, it gained wisdom and learned runes.
Second, it genuinely believed that Britannia had once belonged to the Oghas back when the gods still walked the earth. It was convinced they had to reclaim it.
Third, the hidden shelter in the forest where it had lain while planning its grand scheme was the same place where the guild’s promotion examiner had been hidden—and the circumstances of his death.
We spent a full hour playing hypnosis games, asking every question we could think of.
When we were done, Tirsi pointed toward the Forest of the Holy Water and said,
“We also learned something from the things it refused to answer. The fact that this ogre tried to use the teleportation circle to obtain the Wicker Man ritual must have been part of its plan to dominate Britannia.”
“Yeah. I think I get the picture. It was probably planning to gain power, turn its underlings into intelligent monsters like itself, and then launch some kind of invasion war.”
I shuddered as I answered. The thought of an ogre legion moving with actual tactics and strategy was genuinely terrifying.
Many monsters could handle mana from birth, like dragons. Ogres were the same. Aside from having smaller mana pools, they were natural-born mana users. If those ogres received a massive mana boost from the Jade Seal and deployed the ultimate encirclement-annihilation formation…
Even a modern army armed with the latest science and technology would be helpless. You’d need tanks and missiles to stand a chance.
“It was good that we suppressed it early. However, there is one thing I still do not understand.”
Flash—!
Having said that, Veronica transformed back into her human form. Honestly, watching her constantly switch between divine and mortal forms was a little mentally exhausting, but given the circumstances, I decided not to complain.
Veronica took the Jade Seal from me and examined it carefully.
“My love. Do you understand what this ogre meant by the ‘memories of the Jade Seal’? I cannot sense any special runes or mana from it.”
“Same here. But I think… maybe this bastard gained some kind of knowledge from the Jade Seal?”
“I agree. If it was just an ordinary monster that happened to find the Jade Seal, there’s no way it would know the Britannian language or handle rune magic so skillfully.”
“Exactly. That’s what I meant.”
I nodded along with Tirsi’s addition. If this had just been a slightly smarter ogre A, we wouldn’t have gone through all this trouble. The fact that it could use rune magic and possessed an ancient relic like the Jade Seal was what caused this whole mess.
It feels like there’s some kind of magic placed on the Jade Seal.
I had zero evidence, but that was my gut feeling.
I took the Jade Seal back from Veronica and said,
“Tirsi. Suddenly carrying this thing around is making me nervous. What if I end up going crazy like that thing?”
“Why don’t you take it to the Mage Guild and have it examined? You could ask Lord Cromwell. A mana-storing jade seal isn’t something a sorcerer would go crazy over.”
“That’s a brilliant idea. I’ll do that.”
I clapped my hands and jotted down the task in my notebook for when we got home. If there was some weird brainwashing curse on this thing, we’d be completely screwed. I had to prevent a future where I started ranting about “inferior female races!” in front of my wives.
At that moment, Veronica in her divine form spoke with a slightly uncomfortable tone.
“It seems we have finished everything that needed to be done. Is it not time to grant that thing eternal rest? Even though it is only a soul, the thought of such a wicked being’s ego still lingering is extremely ominous.”
“Don’t worry. I was planning to do it anyway.”
Originally I should have taken the last hit, but I had anticipated this situation and yielded the grand finale to their ice storm. I couldn’t let them steal the final blow from an ogre that was already in soul form.
“Ah. If it is your weapon, the Spear of Divine Silver, it should be simple enough.”
“Huh? No need to go that far.”
“Hm? What do you mean by that?”
“You’ll see… Wait, no. Only I can see it, huh.”
I shrugged and stepped on the fallen ogre’s chest.
—BOOM!
The ogre’s soul couldn’t even wake up before it exploded and vanished into nothing.
“Done.”
For the final moment of a tyrant who dreamed of becoming king, it was ridiculously anticlimactic. Still, I figured it was just karma.
“Huh?”
Veronica’s eyes widened as she stared at the spot where the ogre had been. Of course she couldn’t actually see anything.
“Done already? All I saw was you stepping on it—”
Just as she was expressing her confusion, Veronica was suddenly struck by an even greater shock. Since she was a rune mage, she must have sensed the surge of rune mana rising from the destroyed ogre. Even I, who shouldn’t have been surprised, found myself reacting along with her.
Why? Because the amount absorbed was way more than I expected.
The ogre’s yellow mana slammed into me like a blast from Summon Cloud!
Fuck!! That’s too much!!
“Gaaaaaaaaaaah!!!”
Dizziness hit me. My legs started doing an involuntary pop-and-lock. Classic symptoms of mana overload. The absorption rate was off the charts. For over a minute I flailed around like a bullied kid getting sprayed with a fire extinguisher by the loser squad.
Tirsi quickly raised her wand.
“Is it the ogre soul attacking?! Where?!”
“It’s not… My stomach just feels… Urgh, shit…”
I gave Tirsi the universal “I’m fine, thank you” hand signal and checked the rune mana inside me. Thankfully, the nausea was manageable. Throwing up here would have been beyond pathetic.
—Whiiiirrr!
The rune mana rampaged through my body. I usually pictured rune mana like an experience bar on a golem, and right now it felt like it had filled up almost three full rotations.
Isn’t this amazing? It’s fucking amazing.
It was a huge gain, but I had definitely overeaten.
“—Uweeegh.”
I dry-heaved like someone with morning sickness. They say if you take someone who’s been starving for months to an all-you-can-eat buffet, their body can’t handle it and they might die. This felt exactly like that. I had far exceeded my capacity.
Tirsi, who had been watching anxiously, supported my shoulder.
“Nord. If it’s too hard, you can throw up. I really don’t mind at all.”
“I’m okay… I’m just a little dizzy…”
“Are you sure you’re alright? Your face looks terrible.”
She gently rubbed my back. It really wasn’t that bad, but for some reason tears welled up. When someone comforts you while you’re hurting, doesn’t it always make your tear ducts weaker?
“Hic… ugh…”
After letting out a few tears, I suddenly remembered the Jade Seal’s function and poured rune mana into it.
—Shwooooooo.
As the Jade Seal absorbed the mana, the symptoms of overload quickly faded. I hadn’t thought of any practical uses for it yet since I’d only just obtained it, but it seemed it could be used like this too. Maybe I wouldn’t have to worry about having too much or too little mana anymore.
I removed my hand from Tirsi’s shoulder and stood up.
“Thank you, Tirsi. I’m fine now.”
“Really? You didn’t get hurt during the fight, did you?”
“No. I’m perfectly fine.”
“…That’s a relief.”
I thumped my chest a couple times to show I was healthy, and Tirsi finally seemed reassured. Maybe it was because she came from nobility—her gentle, slightly shy smile suited her perfectly.
“Since we’re done here, let’s just collect the examiner’s belongings and head back. Veronica? We’ll talk about that rune stone or whatever tomorrow before we return to Sargadis.”
I spoke to Veronica, who for some reason was staring at me blankly.
“…Let us do that.”
Veronica nodded, her eyes fixed on me the entire time.
—By the way, it wouldn’t be long before I learned exactly what that expression on her face had meant.
