The Newlywed Home in Sargadis (9)

Honestly, the three of us didn’t have any strong attachments to the condition of a house. Saying that might make people wonder what the hell a couple—well, technically three people with two wives—were doing shopping for a newlywed home, but this was the unfiltered, MSG-free, one-hundred-percent truth.

First of all, me. Back on Earth, I had never once found a place with my own money. Even after I became independent from my parents, I lived in a studio that had nothing wrong with it except the rent, working part-time jobs. So the only conditions I really cared about were “a kitchen, a decent-sized bathroom, and not a semi-basement.” After coming to this goddamn other world, my daily route had been lab-dorm-lab anyway. No matter where I ended up, it had to be better than a slave market. I would politely decline the bitter cold of the western Kitai natives ever again.

‘In that sense, Franc and Dana are exactly the same.’

The type who left home, wandered the world, and finally settled down in their twenties! It was a surprisingly common pattern in this world. People here either lived and died in the place they were born, or they left their hometown to pioneer their own future and became Homo Isegye-tus of the Serengeti. Those whose families weren’t wealthy couldn’t inherit anything and ended up taking the latter path. That was why there were so many adventurers in this world.

Because of that background, I had honestly thought that before coming here we would just glance around and stamp the contract. Something like:

We had that kind of conversation before heading to the government office. But that was the naive thought of someone who had never bought a house with his own money. Once hundreds of millions were on the line, even the smallest details refused to be brushed off with a casual “whatever.”

“──Doesn’t the floor feel a little loose here?”

I inspected the house with the sharp eyes of a detective discovering a serial killer’s footprints. I stomped on every inch of the first-floor flooring and even checked the hinges on the built-in closet. The guy in Thailand’s red-light district who checked whether his opponent had something dangling between his legs probably wasn’t as thorough as I was right now.

Of course, that didn’t mean my wives were bored while I did that. Dana was poking the ceiling of the basement storage with a stick, and Franc had already gone down to the garden and was examining the wall with gloved hands. To be honest, I felt like we were searching for flaws in this house even more viciously than when we explored the Underground Tower.

“Please take your time looking around.”

I wondered if other people acted like this before buying too. The clerk in charge didn’t seem to mind our behavior at all. Apparently selling houses wasn’t a job where his pay depended on commissions like a real estate agent. He just stood outside enjoying his paid vacation time. It was the model attitude of a public servant. So even in this other world, any job that involved land and property was a sweet gig.

‘Well, if he’s going to leave us alone, it’s good for us too.’

Since no one stopped us, my wives and I fully unleashed the investigative instincts that were the racial trait of adventurers. We turned the two-story house upside down like we were exploring ruins, and after two hours we finally gathered at the entrance.

“The basement storage is worse than I thought. I overlooked the poor ventilation.”

“The wall is fine. Still, the garden soil looks a bit damaged, so it’d be better to sprinkle some potion on it.”

“I secretly sprayed water with magic, and the bathroom drains well too. The floor is wooden but clean, and there’s no mold anywhere.”

We put our heads together and shared our opinions. Even so, wasn’t this pretty damn good for a house in this world? It would’ve been nice if houses popped into existence the moment you paid, like in games. You damn raccoon. I only realized spring had come after the flowers had already fallen.

“……Should we look at the other houses too?”

When Franc asked while taking off her gloves, Dana and I exchanged glances and nodded. Since we might live here for several years, we should at least check the other options. So our family went around all four candidate houses we had picked out.

But to our utter disbelief, the remaining houses were on the level where we’d need to call either a love hotel or Professor Baek from the architecture department. A burst sewer line would have been lucky. In one closet we even found what looked like blood splatter. Had some adulterous bastard hidden here and gotten hit with her husband’s “pirate roulette”?

‘Fuck. Were the additional details in the catalog actually warning signs?’

You want us to live in a place where a dead rat pops out of the toilet with a “Surprise!”? I shuddered and fled from the fourth house. A house crawling with rats and bugs wasn’t worth a serious look. Even naturalism should have its limits. A military barracks would be better than that.

“How can the only decent house be the first one we saw?”

When I muttered while wiping my hands, both wives simply nodded like nuns practicing silence. We had become as solemn as cult believers who had witnessed the mysteries of the wild.

“Have you made your decision?”

The clerk asked as we came out. Our faces probably looked like we were debating between cold and lukewarm water rather than having made up our minds. I sighed and answered.

“It’s not easy. The first property we saw feels like the best.”

“As expected.”

The clerk nodded as if he had predicted it. But “as expected”? Before I could even ask why he thought that, he explained.

“This is a fairly well-known secret, but most houses put up for sale usually have some bad incident attached to them.”

“Excuse me?”

My wives and I were shocked, but when we thought about it, it made perfect sense. In any world, the most common inheritance parents could leave their children was the house deed. Even in the 21st century, you rarely saw people with less than 100,000 won in their bank account but a house worth over 100 million. This world had even fewer job types than the 21st century. Here, leaving home literally meant suffering like a dog, as the saying went. With monsters making transportation a nightmare, moving was rare. Dream the American Dream and you might end up in the Aztecan Dream, turned into human jerky.

Therefore, following Darwin’s theory of natural selection—which I hadn’t mentioned in a while—the inductive conclusion was that finding a house in this world was difficult.

“Moreover, Lord Hennesis is an excellent ruler, so the people of this territory rarely leave their hometown.”

That was what the clerk said. Since it was flattery toward a noble, I had to take it with a grain of salt, but I already knew the lord here wasn’t a tyrant.

‘So in the end, the houses on the market belong to people who have circumstances forcing them to liquidate their assets.’

People in that situation wouldn’t have the luxury of properly maintaining a house. Selling a house in this world meant selling your entire livelihood. Even I had been living by dumping my entire master’s salary into inn fees just a few weeks ago, so I felt that reality intensely. The fact that the first house, which had been on the market for three months, was still in such good condition was actually exceptional.

I nodded at the clerk to show I understood, then discussed it with my wives.

“It’s not like we’ll die if we don’t buy today. Why don’t we go back to the inn and come again later?”

“Is that okay? If that property gets sold, you’ll be banging your head against the wall in regret.”

“If someone else buys it in a single day, then I guess that was its fate?”

“But the first house wasn’t bad at all. A little renovation would be enough, and it was built with good stone too.”

“Hmm. Is that so?”

Franc’s words carried weight since she was a half-dwarf. She had decent knowledge of architecture. Dana and I, who could estimate the year a mummy was made but couldn’t explain why a bridgehead didn’t collapse, had nothing to say.

I recalled the mentality of stock investors who, after much deliberation, still end up buying at the top, and said,

“In my hometown, there’s a saying that after thinking too much, you end up shaking hands with the wrong person. The price is reasonable too, so shall we just go with the first house?”

“Yeah, let’s do that. If it’s that house, even if we regret it a bit, we won’t end up in a situation where we have to find another one.”

With my wives’ agreement, I went over to the clerk. The rule that the first item you see is the best seemed to apply even in this other world.

“Will you be purchasing it?”

“Yes. It was 2 gold and 45 silver, right? Please withdraw it from my account.”

“Of ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠course. We’ll make sure you can move in within a week.”

I signed two copies of the contract and took one. Franc and Dana had offered to split the cost, but my pride as the head of the household wouldn’t allow it. To keep adding wives and then split the financial burden with all of them? How would that be any different from being a pimp? It would basically be a multi-level marketing version of a kept man.

‘Fuck. Anyway, I’m glad it ended at 2 gold.’

Even though I acted tough, I secretly calculated my account balance and felt relieved. Maybe because it was a rural ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠area, we managed to buy a really nice house for 200 million. I absolutely didn’t regret bringing Dana into the family, but because I had proposed to Franc after saving up the money for a house we would live in together, it had been a little tight.

‘Thank god we have the elixir. If any more money had to go out, I would’ve had to put a red tag on the mithril spear.’

The account balance had dropped to the silver level, but my heart felt light. Let’s hold out until next spring, sell the elixir, explore the ruins marked on the map, and aim to raise both my academic degree and adventurer rank at the same time.

After buying the house, we stopped by the adventurer guild for the first time in a while. It must have been since the time we went along to exterminate the golems. This was the first time I had left more ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠than a week’s gap since coming here, but the fact that it didn’t feel awkward at all showed I had adapted to the adventurer lifestyle.

“Ahaha♡! So the adventurer guild feels like this when it’s quiet!”

Larilura, who had come along, chattered with high tension. Since Dana had gone to work on restoring the map, I had brought Franc and Larilura with me to the guild.

“Larilura. What happened with the circus performances?”

“Once the Autumn Harvest Record ends, winter comes! No one comes to watch a circus in cold weather. The standard is to work hard in autumn and rest in winter, but this time I thought I’d prepare for winter in advance too!”

Larilura blew on her palms as she answered Franc’s question. It wasn’t cold enough yet for her breath to be visible.

“I already spent most of the money I got last time from Senior and Sister on modifying Ringling, and I want to raise my adventurer rank to Bronze by the end of the harvest season.”

“And then hold performances in autumn, count the remaining money in winter, and only take Bronze Class requests when you really need to?”

“That’s exactly right☆!”

When I spoke based on what I roughly understood, Larilura winked and acted cute.

“I don’t think I’ve seen you perform since you came to Sargadis.”

“Well, you see~? I ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠didn’t realize it either, but when I tried to plan a schedule, there’s a limit to what I can do alone…….”

“A limit?”

“People do come to see the simplified performances of a famous circus troupe, but I suddenly thought that a bard who used to be in a circus would get boring after watching a few times…… Plus, originally all the performances were planned by the ringmaster, and I just had to train according to that…….”

Larilura spoke as if her pride as a clown had taken a slight scratch. Even a circus troupe equipped with animal acts, fire shows, and puppet performances couldn’t keep doing business in the same place forever. Unless it was a tourist spot with high foot traffic, it would end up like how people in the capital thought of Seongsimdang—Is that place really that good?

Since it wasn’t an industry I knew well, I couldn’t come up with any sharp advice.

“But you’re still learning and growing, right? It’s only been one or two weeks since you left the circus troupe. It’s not good to start putting yourself down already.”

“Uuuu…… Sister Franc……”

Franc stroked Larilura’s head and comforted her. Larilura had also been building up her skills by learning the ritual combination I used when I proposed to Franc. That would probably be usable in performances. Of course, every time I saw it I felt embarrassed, so I didn’t really want to go watch.

Larilura rubbed her face against Franc’s chest and said,

“So, from now on, instead of doing half-hearted performances, I want to increase the acrobatic skills I can do by myself. I think that’s why the ringmaster let me travel alone.”

“Having a goal is a good thing. You can earn money, learn magic from the Mage Guild, or come up with new acts.”

After all, life was about setting goals and tackling them one by one.

“Yes! In the end, money is the problem! I don’t want to hear that nothing has changed when I go back to Romania next spring♡!”

Larilura made a V sign with her index finger. It was impressive how Franc watched her with a motherly smile.

Anyway, the fact that Larilura had decided to seriously continue her adventurer activities became the trigger for a new change in my own adventurer life.

It happened when we went to the reception desk with our party members to turn in a request.

“Sir Norde. You have earned the qualification to be promoted to Silver Class.”

It was the tired-looking young woman I had seen when I first joined the Audumla Guild. She delivered the slightly overdue news.