The Tower Extending Underground (8)
It had been ten days since I spent my first night with Dana. That was when the reply from the archaeological community finally arrived.
“If you strip away all the bullshit fancy wording, it basically says ‘just go explore the damn thing.’”
Dana showed me the letter that had come from the archaeological society. Even to my eyes, the content looked exactly like what she had summarized.
Dispatching researchers would provide no meaningful assistance to the exploration. There is no need to wait.
Secure local collaborators on-site and proceed with entry immediately.
“Permission granted. For those crusty old farts in the academic world, one week is actually pretty fast.”
I folded the letter and handed it back to Dana. The entire party was already gathered.
Dana burst out laughing. “I fucking agree. Anyway, I wanna head out today. What about you guys?”
“That’s perfect. I was starting to feel bad about keeping the schedule open any longer,” Tirsi said.
Larilura nodded vigorously in agreement. “I totally agree! I hate this damp, gloomy weather~. It rains every single day lately. I wonder if it’ll be nicer and fresher inside the ruins☆?”
“Heh heh. It’s underground. You’re asking for a lot,” I replied.
“Actually, it might be less humid than you think. My mouth already feels dry just thinking about it.”
Dana twisted the corner of her mouth in a bold grin. “They say that ruin is crawling with creatures from another dimension, right?”
“That’s what they say. Why the hell do you look so excited?”
As expected of someone from the Ulster bloodline, she had the blood of a battle-crazed tribe running through her veins. I suddenly worried what would happen if Dana, once she got used to sex, pinned me down and jumped me. No way—I refuse to be reverse-attacked with battle-sex by my own wife!
…Anyway, jokes aside, I had already heard that monsters appeared in that half-underground tower. Apparently quite a lot of them for a ruin.
I think I mentioned this before, but encountering monsters inside the ruins of an ancient civilization is actually pretty rare.
‘It’s a ruin excavated from underground? Then that settles it.’
These places had been abandoned for hundreds of years. Whether monster or beast, nothing can survive without eating. If something had been wandering around a subterranean ruin for over a century, you’d better run the fuck away.
‘That’s usually the case, but there are always exceptions.’
There were three main reasons you’d run into monsters in ruins.
First, they weren’t actually living creatures. Second, they had claimed the ruin as their nest before anyone else. Third, they had been placed there as traps.
The first case involved things like golems or undead—creatures that didn’t need to eat. Undead could only survive if they were the non-rotting kind like skeletons, and golems would eventually stop once their mana ran out.
The second case was self-explanatory. Like the Beast Regression ruins or that hobgoblin shaman, they had invaded the ruin first and turned it into their own territory.
And the third—
“It’s the same principle as golem creation, right?” Tirsi said. She had come fully equipped with her wand and robe.
“They summon servants that obey their master and attack intruders. That’s why they set up magic circles or magic items.”
“And in this case, those servants are extradimensional summons?”
“That’s right, Franc.”
Franc let out a small groan. She had also heard the rumors that the monsters inside the ruin looked incredibly disgusting.
Unlike her, though, I felt a spark of excitement.
Extradimensional creatures summoned through magic!
‘Maybe…’
Maybe I would find a clue about dimensional travel—the very thing I had been searching for.
They said that during the golden age of ancient civilization, spatial movement wasn’t some impossible dream. It had been a strategically utilized technology. Even if the documents were hard to decipher, finding anything at all would be huge!
The thought of stumbling upon a clue to the purpose of my life in such an unexpected place made my heart race with genuine excitement.
“Still, it’s strange. It’s a tower that wasn’t built expecting people to enter, yet it’s full of traps meant to crush intruders.”
But that was a separate issue.
I gathered everyone’s attention and shared my thoughts.
“In other words, this building was constructed to ‘prevent intrusion by any means necessary.’”
“……Should we be hopeful? Or should we worry about a repeat of the ‘Fourth Pyramid Liberation Incident’ that happened in Narmer-Nile?” Tirsi asked, citing a famous case of ‘messing with a ruin and getting utterly fucked’ with clear concern in her voice.
Historically, very few people had died from digging up ruins. But just like how people who fly automatically think of plane crashes, the worry was natural.
“There’s no point worrying about it. The greedy bastards have probably already gone inside before we even moved.”
As if to brush off Tirsi’s concerns, Dana declared firmly, “That’s exactly why I have to go. If there’s something dangerous in that ruin, someone who can figure out what it is needs to be there. Someone like me—who actually studied archaeology.”
Dana spoke of her duty with calm composure. She looked every bit like a knight heading off to war—dignified and resolute.
─Boop.
I secretly poked her in the side.
“Hyaaat?!”
Dana jumped like a dog that had been poked in the ribs while sleeping. Her eyes went from surprise to confusion, then straight to rage.
“What the fuck are you doing, you bastard?! Damn it, can’t I strike a cool pose for once?!”
“You can. Our Dana looked so fucking cool I almost fell for you again.”
I chuckled, then put on a serious face.
“But ease up on the shoulders a bit. You’ve been way too stiff ever since you became research director. When have we ever cared about duty and obligation?”
“……Hmph.”
She must have realized it herself, because Dana pretended to sulk. Heh heh. Cute.
Anyway, if that tower had been truly dangerous, the rookie adventurers from Sargadis would have been wiped out first. Yet most of them had come back fine. The only ones who returned with their minds broken or their severed limbs stuffed in bags were a handful of idiots.
“No need to be scared. That black mage bastard tried to clear it all by himself. If I could chop that fucker’s head off his body, what’s there that I can’t clear?”
It was pure bravado, but I said it to boost morale.
‘The reason that horned black mage promoted golem creation was definitely because of that ruin.’
He had been digging up the ground by creating golems in order to locate the underground tower. I used to think spawning golems just to draw aggro was incredibly stupid, but apparently there had been a reason. That bastard really was full of surprises. What a fucking pain in the ass.
I cursed the one-horned unicorn bug bastard thoroughly in my head before speaking again.
“Let’s get ready and head out. This is our party’s first official expedition. Let’s make it a perfect success with no one getting hurt.”
─Flash.
As I spoke, the mithril spear I had completed yesterday gleamed impressively over my shoulder.
‘But I still haven’t practiced enough with the spear.’
Hmm. Fuck it. I’ll get used to it in battle. Let’s trust in my genius.
Our party walked all the way to the crater on foot. We had considered renting horses at first but gave up on the idea. There was no one to watch the horses while we were descending into the ruin.
“Tsk. Am I destined to live and die as a pedestrian forever?”
“Once you succeed, why don’t you buy a carriage~?” Larilura said. She was once again being carried by Ringling No. 3 or 3.5 or whatever it was.
Succeed more? What, do I need to earn a noble title or something?
I clicked my tongue. “Whether it’s a carriage or a horse, it’s meaningless unless you have someone to take care of and look after it. That’s why mansions and fine steeds are symbols of wealth. They prove you have the financial power to maintain them.”
If I bought a horse or carriage now, it would be like buying a sports car and parking it at a monthly-rent apartment. While living in a semi-basement single room, no less. How pathetic would that look? I wouldn’t even have money to fix the bumper if it got damaged.
“Rather than that… we should probably look for a house near the lab.”
“A house?”
Franc, who was riding with Larilura on Ringling 3.5, reacted in 0.1 seconds flat. The speed was so fast I flinched a little.
“Uh, yeah. Why? Did you want to get a house too, Franc?”
“Huh? No, it’s not that… but you’ll definitely talk to me and Dana about it first, right?”
“Khh khh. Of course. What kind of terrible husband would go house-hunting without asking his wives’ opinions?”
Whew. Thank fuck. I secretly stroked my chest in relief.
I had been wondering when Franc would finally want to move out of the inn life. If she had said yes, the guilt would have crushed me. I would have run straight to a real estate office after finishing work today.
‘I personally don’t mind living in a motel since cleaning is a hassle, but…’
Coming back to the motel every day arm-in-arm with my girlfriend! It had a deliciously lewd charm to it, didn’t it? Just imagining it made my dick twitch.
‘But we’re not just lovers anymore. She’s my wife. My family.’
When it comes to Koreans, it’s all about the house. And when it comes to houses, it’s all about Koreans. Aren’t we the people who, even when playing Animal Crossing, pay off our loans and upgrade the house first?
‘House deed, jeonse apartment, independence!’
I personally believe that any Korean who doesn’t feel their heart race at those words has the qualities of a psychopath.
To a pure-blooded macho man like me, the word ‘newlywed home’ was something that stimulated both my dick and my heart at the same time.
“Hey. You don’t have to pick a place near the lab. Don’t worry about your noona’s commute.”
Dana, now changed into her combat uniform, came closer and spoke.
I shrugged as if it was nothing. “What are you talking about? I wasn’t thinking about that on purpose. There are just a lot of good spots in that district, so stop being so self-conscious.”
“Look at you making excuses because you got caught. Just looking at your face makes reasonable suspicion one hundred percent possible.”
─Thump thump.
Dana grinned and jabbed me with her elbow. Thanks to that, her completely smooth, hairless armpit was fully visible.
‘Whoa, fuck. Seeing it like this, her combat uniform is seriously hot as hell.’
The best comparison would be a black-and-white punk-style nun suit. The tight top and the cape that exposed her shoulders suited Dana perfectly, but what turned me on the most was the fishnet stockings peeking out from the slit of her short skirt.
Back in the day, I used to look at those outfits and the clothes of other female adventurers and be moved by the fashion culture of this other world. But after awakening as a graduate student slave, seeing Dana dressed like that just felt like looking at my mom’s underwear.
─Twitch.
But now it was different. My dick compass, which had overcome the boredom of graduate school life and gone through a second adolescence, was trying to point straight at Dana’s thighs!
She was wearing clothes that showed off her slender figure and incredible legs. It would be weirder if I didn’t get hard.
‘……If I asked her to do a “sex-cuse-me” while wearing that, would I get beaten up?’
Since it seemed likely, I wisely kept my mouth shut.
In the ten days since our first night, Dana had come to the inn where we were staying quite often. But every time the mood started heading in that direction, she would run away.
‘It’s really disappointing… but I guess it can’t be helped.’
I understood. She was probably embarrassed about being compared to Franc’s huge breasts, and constantly losing the initiative probably didn’t suit Dana’s taste.
But if she suggested doing it in that outfit? I might really get my balls grabbed by an extremely pissed-off Dana and be put in my place.
‘By the way, no matter how you look at it, there’s zero druid vibe.’
That was why I had been so surprised when I first heard about her origins. Even giving her a hundred concessions, Dana’s fashion was that of a thug nun. It was miles away from a druid. But there was no law saying you had to dress according to your origins, so maybe that was fine?
If we followed that kind of racist logic, wouldn’t I have to walk around dressed like a shaman? Men’s hanbok wasn’t my style. Though I definitely wanted to see my wives in women’s hanbok someday. And as for the Ulster traditional clothing of being naked… well, I had already seen that.
“It’s starting to come into view now.”
At that moment, Tirsi pointed ahead. A crater area packed with tents like a campsite had appeared.
“Tsk.”
Dana clicked her tongue at the sight. “It’s fucking packed. That’s why I always say there’s never anything good about discovering a ruin near people’s living areas.”
She ruffled her hair in annoyance. She always messed up her style like that, which was why her hair was perpetually a fluffy mess.
“Hmm. What are those people doing, camping out in front of the ruin? Don’t they have anything better to do?”
“They’re either the waiting team for colleagues who went inside, or trash adventurers who have nothing better to do and came to make some pocket change.”
“Trash adventurers?”
Larilura tilted her head at my explanation. But she understood what I meant in less than three minutes.
“Hey there. Going on a picnic, are we?”
─Rustle rustle.
About ten men blocking our path! They looked like the kind of people who had lived thoroughly worthless lives. They surrounded us and let out eerie laughs.
They weren’t bandits. Every single one of them was wearing plate armor.
I stepped forward as the representative of the party.
“We’ve come to explore the ruins. If you have business with us, I’ll hear it.”
“Kwa ha ha ha! Explore, my ass. You mean loot, right?! Let’s not pretend with fellow professionals.”
A scrawny man who seemed to find something very funny. He must be the leader of this bunch.
“Looting, huh. Yeah, it’s pretty similar.”
That’s what archaeologists are like anyway. Even on Earth, English and French archaeologists considered it the joy of life to go to other countries, smash artifacts, and stuff them in their bags. Since we were going to take artifacts and sell them if they were worth money, calling us grave robbers was pretty accurate.
“Heh heh. Good, good. I like honest people. Then you’ll be able to sympathize with how we feel.”
The scrawny man stretched out an arm covered in flashy tattoos—he had rolled up only that sleeve—and spoke.
“Think about it. We bravely went in and dug up a ruin when we had no idea what was inside, right? So how unfair would it be if the bastards who were just watching from the back come crawling out saying ‘Oh~ it looks safe~’?”
“Ah, yes. You’ve all clearly suffered a lot.”
How long do I have to keep talking to these guys? I was already hit with a sudden wave of annoyance and was fiddling with the spear slung over my shoulder.
Maybe my desire for him to just get to the point since the conclusion was obvious got through? The trash adventurer spoke smoothly.
“Ten coppers. Exactly that much for all of you. We’d appreciate it if you paid us that much as a thank-you for confirming the safety of this ruin. You can at least pay that much in labor fees, right?”
Of course it was that. I let out a sigh. It was so predictable it wasn’t even surprising.
Even in South Korea, which had been among the developed countries until the 2000s, this kind of extortion was an everyday occurrence. And I had heard that in countries with bad public security like Mexico and the Philippines, it was common even before I came to this world.
Maybe because this was a world with a lot of mothers going missing globally, these bastards all had the same damn repertoire.
“Khh khh khh. Or, well, those young ladies could play with us for a bit.”
That was when it happened. The scrawny man with the sleazy laugh said something he really shouldn’t have.
“……What?”
“Oh come on. Why are you pretending you didn’t hear? It’s no fun if only you get to enjoy it. If you had a good time playing around with women, you should know how to share that joy with others, right?”
─Kekeke!
The adventurers surrounding us burst into laughter along with him. At that, both Dana and Tirsi frowned.
“Those kids riding that weird toy over there are fine. Just bring us the weird nun-dressed bitch next to you and the mage lady.”
“──Haa☆?”
“Kids……?”
The scrawny man who had stepped on two landmines in an instant didn’t realize his situation and kept playing with his knife as he spoke.
“Just one day. Play with us for one day and we’ll even cut the fee down to five coppers.”
“And of course you can come back if you want more!!”
“Kwa ha ha ha ha!! Hey, don’t scare them too much!! That guy’s already scared shitless!!”
The idiots were having the time of their lives laughing.
I didn’t answer and instead glanced at Dana.
“Fuck, what are you even asking for? Just do it.”
With veins popping on her forehead, Dana nodded.
The scrawny man who had heard our conversation grinned slyly.
“Just do it? What, is one day not enough for you?”
“No. It’s platinum.”
I swung the shaft of my spear and smashed it into the scrawny man’s face.
─BAAAAAM!!
The scrawny man collapsed in a single blow. The mithril spear’s first blooding turned out to be smacking a trash adventurer’s face with the shaft. The opponent was so pathetic compared to the weapon’s quality that I almost felt sorry for the guy.
But I had no time to feel sadness. I shouted in rage.
“You fucking bastards!! How dare you eye my women!!”
“F-fuck!! How dare you touch our boss?!”
“Boss my ass, you sons of bitches!! You’re all dead!!”
These bastards were openly appraising and sexually harassing Franc and Dana right in front of my wide-open eyes?
I gripped my spear in reverse and chanted the spell.
“Have a little taste of my psionic storm!! Lightning Missile!!”