The Brutal Earth Mage (2)
The sound of hooves clattered loudly. The ragtag subjugation force set off on their noisy journey. The pathetic excuse for a group only pretended to maintain any semblance of military discipline for the first ten minutes. Once the march dragged on through the monotonous landscape, they started chattering among themselves.
“Golem~ Golem~ Ringling’s parts~♡”
Even some of that noise came from Larilura. What the hell was she doing singing a marching song? She sang it way too well, which somehow made it even more ridiculous.
I asked Larilura, who was nestled in Ringling Unit 3 and swinging her legs, “Can you really use a golem core as a part for a marionette?”
“There’s a structure that extracts mana from objects and uses it☆! It’s similar to the main core of standard golems, but since its purpose is simple, it’s easy to make!”
“Ah, like an emergency engine. Still, doesn’t Ringling Unit 3’s torso lack the space for something like that?”
“Unlike standard golems, marionettes don’t care where you put the core! Ah, but the exact location is a secret♡?”
“I didn’t ask, and I don’t care.”
When I lost interest, Franc asked, “By the way, Larilura. Did you make that empty space in Ringling Unit 3’s torso to use as a bag?”
“No? When I was little, I used to climb inside and control it from there☆! Back when I was a child, I loved tight, cozy spaces!”
“Hehe. Really? I was the same way.”
“Ahaha♥! I found another thing in common with Big Sis Franc! For some reason, that makes me really happy!”
──Kyaa kyaa, kyarururu!
The two beautiful girls chatted happily together. Kids everywhere love squeezing into tight closets or wardrobes. It seemed that even in this other world, the universal rule still applied. The marionette sorcerer’s glaring weakness of pathetic defense could be solved if you could climb inside and control it directly. Assuming, of course, you had enough mana to operate something that large and a body strong enough to withstand the movements.
“Do not break formation! Those at the front, shorten your stride!”
──Clop clop clop!
A Gold Class adventurer rode a stern-looking black horse like a war steed, keeping the group in check. It felt exactly like a military march, which was fucking annoying. After marching for about an hour, we finally reached the area where the golems had appeared. The scouts who had gone ahead returned and reported that they had located the golems.
“Golems spotted ahead!! Everyone prepare for combat!!”
Aye, Captain!
I muttered under my breath as I prepared for battle. Franc and Larilura also got into a combat-ready stance.
──Thud. Thud.
The source of the golem outbreak was an open plain. The near-wasteland flatlands displayed an almost Australopithecus-level visual absurdity. A landscape of walking dirt mounds happily digging up the ground! The earth golems frolicking as if they had forgotten their own weight even gave off a pastoral vibe. Or should I say, a Shakyamuni vibe? It somehow sounded like a Buddhist term.
“Fuck! There’s a shit-ton of them!”
“No need to worry about going home empty-handed!”
The adventurers seemed to only think about money when they saw the swarm of at least a hundred golems. To see nothing but money in such a sacred, Buddha-like scene. This truly was Buddha Hell. Namu Amitabha.
“Poooooo……”
“BOBOBOBOBOBO.”
The golems that spotted us began to approach. Their speed was pathetically slow, but their numbers could not be underestimated.
‘More importantly, these bastards are talking.’
Since I couldn’t understand them, it was probably just meaningless cries. Still, they looked higher level than the runaway golems we had caught last time.
“I’m first!!”
“Get lost!! I’ll burn them all with magic!!”
“Hee──hya!!”
“Stop!!! Maintain formation!!!!”
The adventurer bastards tried to charge forward as if it were natural to break formation, but the Gold Class adventurer stopped them.
──Screeech!!
The adventurers who slammed to a halt had faces as twisted as HR employees staring at their paycheck envelopes while getting lectured.
“Hey, come on, Boss. Are you saying we’d actually lose to these puny things?”
“It’s not about worrying we’ll lose. I have a duty to lead this subjugation force to victory on behalf of the guild masters.”
“Tsk… Haa. Why are you so stiff? You’re not even a knight. The conditions for joining the subjugation force didn’t say anything about following orders, did they? And what about the cores? You’re not seriously going to suggest equal distribution, are you?”
The lean, muscular adventurer, who seemed quite experienced, pointed out the contract conditions in rebuttal. As he said, these were things that needed to be clearly stated in advance.
“Hmm.”
Even the Gold Class adventurer couldn’t respond to that. Suppressing them with force would be easy, but above Gold Class, public reputation mattered. If his record said something like ‘beat up lower adventurers for disobeying orders,’ his path to Platinum would grow distant.
“POPO!!”
And of course, while all this was happening, the golems continued their advance. After all, we were a group of adventurers loaded with metal! Golems were creatures even more obsessed with stone and iron than dinosaurs that ate gastroliths! There was no way they would miss us.
“Anyway, for this battle, follow the formation!! I’ll reassess the formation after combat!!”
“Ugh. Anyone would think we enlisted in the army.”
“Oh dear. When a Gold Class sir is commanding, how could we mere Bronze dare to argue! We just have to do exactly as we’re told, exactly as we’re told!”
Grumbling and sarcastic, the subjugation force entered battle. Warriors holding shields stood at the front and thrust their weapons forward.
“Pooo……”
When magic started flying from the middle of the formation, the golems that had numbered over ten were wiped out pathetically. It was only natural. We had far greater numbers and superior strength, so comparing them was meaningless.
After a battle that ended in less than ten seconds, one of the chattering Bronze adventurers sighed.
“Boss? What are you going to do now? You need to tell us who owns the cores of those golems first.”
“……Haa.”
The Gold Class adventurer let out a deep sigh at the question. He had tried so hard to set the mood, but this wasn’t the military. If he had set conditions from the beginning it might have been different, but we were just a hastily gathered bunch. There was no way to make them obey when money was on the line. Even I couldn’t think of a method to control these adventurers.
In the end, the poor bastard who had been saddled with the title of leader by the guild masters offered a last resort.
“Don’t stray too far and fight within your own teams! Any team that causes a dispute will have their loot and rewards restricted!!”
“Now we’re talking!!”
“Everyone!! Gather up!!”
──Whoosh!
Once permission was granted, the adventurers gathered with their party members and scattered. With everyone acting independently, the formation completely fell apart.
“Uwaa…… Will this really be okay?”
Larilura, who was controlling Ringling Unit 3, asked worriedly. I had to think hard about what to say in the face of a level of freedom comparable to middle school lunch hour.
“I guess every field feels like this on-site, right?”
That had been my experience. Unless the boss or the government cracked down hard, on-site work in the 3D industry always ended up like this. Careless safety practices topped with work negligence completed the ultimate shitshow operation.
“Let’s just fight moderately. If we’re careful, no one will get hurt.”
Weak enemies that conveniently gathered on their own! The golems’ characteristics and pathetic weakness turned the battle into something closer to a shooting gallery. All we had to do was stay in place, defend ourselves, and intercept the enemies that came at us…… or so I thought.
“Huh?”
“POOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!”
“BOBOBOBOBOBOBOBO──!!!!”
A swarm of golems, a swarm of golems, a swarm of golems!! I shuddered as I watched dozens of golems charging toward us with a thunderous rumble!!
“Eeeek?! Golem? Why are there so many golems?!”
“Norde!! Don’t just stand there like an idiot, run!!!”
“Retreating is also part of strategy──!!!”
The golems’ charge resembled a herd of crazed buffalo! We had no choice but to flee like a two-member girl group and their manager running from obsessive fanboys!!
“POPOPO──!!”
“Popo my ass, you fucking popo!!!”
As I screamed and ran, I realized something!! These walking clay doll bastards weren’t chasing us—they were chasing me!! Their gaze was so intense I could feel it even through their empty eye sockets!!
“Franc! Larilura! I’ll lure them, so take some down from behind!!”
“Norde?! What are you going to do alone?!”
“Senior!! It’s dangerous if you get separated!!”
“We don’t have a choice right now!!”
I ignored my party’s protests and made a hard left turn.
──Rumble rumble!!
The golems chased after me as if they had been waiting for it!! I immediately drew my sword and activated its full release.
“! !”
──Crack!
A blue light descended from above and settled on my blade! This was my new technique!! Cold Aura!
Come on, you bastards!!
I shouted a battle cry and attacked.
“Eat shit and die—!”
──Crunch!
The sword, carrying cold energy and the power of Beast Regression, slammed into a golem. According to my Norde measurement system, it was a strike backed by roughly thirty times the leg strength of an ordinary person. There was no way a mere earth golem whose physical resistance had been sealed by magic could withstand it!
“BOBOBOB.”
But why the fuck is it fine?
“……What the—?”
I froze in the exact posture I had swung my sword from. Fuck. Did these bastards level up their defense along with their language tech tree?
Flustered, I overclocked my elite brain at full speed and quickly identified the cause of this disaster.
“Ah, damn it. I didn’t combine the spell formula.”
Freezing Hand had low base output. It wasn’t even a spell I used often. That was why almost no mana had gone into the spell formula. To increase its power like in the previous battle, I needed to combine it with Beast Regression and directly connect it to my mana vessel and mana catheter. But Beast Regression only applied to my body, so it couldn’t cover the sword as well.
‘I’m fucked.’
I realized this and cutely bonked myself on the head.
“Eck!”
“POPOOOOOOOO──!!”
“BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!”
“Gyaaaaaaaah!!!”
Rumble rumble─!! I had bet on the possibility that the golems’ aesthetic sense differed from humans and tried acting cute, but it had the opposite effect! These fucking dirt clods seemed to like fat ones, just like the clay figurines of ancient primitives!
I was buried under the swarm of charging golems.
“Grrrrrrk……!!”
They weren’t even hitting me—they were just piling on top and crushing me. I let out a dying groan from the sensation of being buried alive. It was exactly like the “sandwich” game kids played in middle school where they piled on top of each other. Back then, there had been a teacher with a stick who stopped such dangerous games after hearing a student from another school had died! But in this other world, there was no such kind teacher who used frozen tuna as a bat!
“Oh my goodness!! Everyone!! Look over there!!”
At that moment, I heard adventurers gathering from afar. Oh fuck, are they coming to save me?
“While that person holds them off, everyone attack at once!!”
“Ooooh!!! He’s single-handedly blocking the golems for us!!!”
“A true hero!! Kitai warrior!! Kitai warrior!! Kitai warrior!!”
The adventurers, sensing prime farming time, began slaughtering the golems surrounding me!
“You sons of bitches, call 119!!!”
Isn’t it common courtesy to help me first, you fucking animals!!!
Hearing my screams, Franc and Larilura rushed over.
“I-I’ll save you right now, Norde!!”
“Mama……. I feel like I’m being crushed by a concrete mixer……”
“Senior!! Keep your mouth shut!! If dirt gets in, you’ll suffocate and die!!”
“Gyaaaaak……”
──Thud!! Thud!!
The sounds of hammers and marionette punches exploding! My party members were clearing away the sandwich golems piled on top of me. Sandwich was a term for that shady form of social lynching.
“You two over there!! Please step aside!!”
“Ah, oh?! Yes!”
“Waaah!! It’s a mage, Senior! A mage!”
Mage my ass, I feel like I’m about to be crushed to death. If I die under dirt, does that count as dying by nature? A natural death? Honestly, my body could hold out, but I was scared I might actually suffocate and die like this.
“Mana of the flowing wind around my husband. This is the second tier of the four elements, the execution of the storm.”
At that moment, the person identified as a mage chanted a spell. I had been too busy screaming to respond, but my eyes widened at the elegant incantation.
“With a mighty gesture, cast them out! !!”
"Mana of the flowing wind around my husband."
"This is the second tier of the four elements, the execution of the storm."
⟨ Etten's Refusal ⟩
Whooooooosh──!!
The rapid-fire spell completed, and the weight on my back vanished.
──Roll roll roll!!
I rolled out like Sonic and saw the golems caught in the whirlwind, now in an “I can fly” state.
“Uwaaah!! Flying golems!!”
“BOPOOOO!!!”
──Crash crash crash!
──Thud thud!
The golems floated about ten meters up before the magic cut off, sending them plummeting mercilessly to the ground. They never moved again. Their cores seemed intact, but with their limbs shattered, they were as good as done. Ten golems had been turned into ragdolls in the blink of an eye.
“If the impact is distributed evenly across the entire body, they break easily. That’s the weakness of earth golems.”
The person who said this while lowering her wand was, of course, Tirsi. Standing with her back to the cold wind, her dignified figure truly showed the majesty of a mage. Tirsi skillfully winked at me.
“Norde, you’re not hurt anywhere, are you?”