Even If It's Spread Like This... You Wouldn't Just Watch, Right?
"Ah, uh, uhh…."
I couldn't tell why, but I sensed a certain atmosphere. I'd never experienced anything like this before, yet my heart felt strangely ticklish. My chest swelled with emotion too… If I said I hadn't thought about this at all, that would be a lie.
Maybe ever since I revealed that I was a writer, that my pen name was SisterLover, and that I wrote the erotic novel 486 Ways to Eat My Little Sister, I'd somehow sensed things might turn out this way. That could be why I'd kept these facts hidden from my "younger sister" for nearly three years.
But that was all just my own delusional fantasy. It wasn't reality. It was nothing more than a fragment of my imagination, a domain of my delusions.
Yet reality was now taking a step closer to that fantasy. No, it was sprinting full speed ahead.
Not only had my "younger sister" and I started saying things like "pubic hair" to each other, but even though my eyes had been closed, I still vividly remembered the sensation that had touched my hand. And now my "younger sister" had even grabbed my cock in her hand.
Of course, whether she'd wanted that was unclear, and it was true that my forceful actions had been involved in the process, but the situation that had unfolded… the reality we faced was exactly that.
And maybe Eun-yeong had secretly been expecting this too… Maybe that's why she'd made that suggestion to me… My delusions kept pouring oil on the fire.
Anyway, I might have unconsciously been hoping for or waiting for something like this. But the reality I faced was a little different from what I'd imagined.
My "younger sister" lay spread open in front of me… and she was fumbling to pull down her pants while sprawled on the floor.
My cock was already fully erect, and the precum that had leaked out had soaked my underwear and pants, but somewhere in the back of my mind, my rationality was trying to stop me from getting so worked up that I couldn't see straight.
Don't make a mistake. This is irreversible. It's definitely an irreversible mistake. Don't do something you'll regret, it screamed at me.
"Ah…."
The shorts my "younger sister" had been wriggling in were now sliding down past her thighs. Dark pubic hair appeared between her pale crotch. They were past her knees now. Lying completely flat, she kicked her legs, trying to fling off the shorts that were getting in the way.
All sorts of thoughts flashed through my mind. I'd written scenes like what would happen next hundreds of times. I didn't know if they were right or wrong, but at least they were fantasies born from what I imagined I would do.
Moving my "younger sister" to a soft bed instead of the hard floor… If it was her first time, putting a towel underneath… Those thoughts made my head feel ticklish.
But what about after that? And after that? Would we become lovers like in a novel? Whisper sweet nothings like in a novel? Could life really flow so easily like in a novel? Those stray thoughts filled my head.
And then there were the moments I'd deliberately excluded from my novels. Confrontations and conflicts with family, and beyond that, the negative gazes of society. Countless people saying we were wrong. People secretly pointing fingers behind our backs.
But before all that, if I asked myself whether this kind of relationship with my "younger sister" could really be upright, I knew all too well that I couldn't immediately answer yes.
A relationship meant starting something together. Regret meant coming to hate that beginning. And eventually, we'd come to hate each other too. So we shouldn't start. That was the best option. There was no other way.
With some kind of conviction, I moved my body.
"W-wait, just a second!!"
My fully erect cock had made my pants bulge out considerably. It made movement awkward, but before my "younger sister"'s shorts could be completely pulled off, I grabbed them and started yanking them back up.
"Hah, haah… haaah…."
Just that brief sprint had left me breathless, my heart pounding so hard it felt like it might burst. A sweet taste filled my mouth, and sweat trickled down my forehead.
"Ah…."
Still lying sprawled out, Eun-yeong had a dazed expression. She looked at me with a face full of confusion.
"…This isn't right… You, what were you trying to do?"
All I could think was that I needed to talk her down. She might get hurt in the process, but this was a moment where harsh words were necessary for both of us.
"…Don't get swept up in the moment… Doing something you'll regret is even worse."
Our eyes met in the air. Fortunately, my words seemed to have an effect—her dazed gaze gradually regained some life and energy.
"…W-we're siblings. Siblings doing this… is only possible in novels. And we're living in reality. This reality has no romance or anything like in novels. Got it…?"
Eun-yeong looked up at me with wide eyes. Then she started frowning deeply, as if she didn't understand the seriousness of the situation. She probably couldn't accept it.
"…Don't think that it's okay as long as we don't get caught. People have a strong desire to be acknowledged, so no matter how well we hide it… eventually, wanting our relationship to be recognized, we'll end up telling our parents the truth ourselves. And then we'll regret it. So it's not that simple."
Just from her eyes, I could tell what Eun-yeong was about to say. And whether it was an occupational hazard or not, I'd thought deeply about these kinds of things many times, so I knew better than anyone that this shouldn't be taken lightly.
"I know, I get what you're thinking, but still, no means no."
I spoke with a bit more firmness. I thought that was my duty as her older brother, even if only by a year. And I was certain that even if this drove us apart, it would be far better than us hating each other later.
So with conviction, I spoke again.
"…We can't."
And with a troubled heart, I pulled Eun-yeong's shorts back up to where they belonged.
Of course, it would be a lie to say my heart hadn't wavered. But just as I was feeling a bit proud of myself for holding back, for not surrendering to instinct alone—
"…What the hell are you saying all of a sudden…?"
Eun-yeong's expression was colder than I'd ever seen it. Even when she usually looked at me with disdain or sometimes disgust, she'd never made a face like this. But now her face was all scrunched up and filled with anger.
I thought she couldn't accept what I'd said. I was racking my brain for how to break her stubbornness when—
"…This, this… is what you said…."
She ground her teeth audibly, spitting out the words like she was chewing them.
"R-research material… experience… th-that kind of thing…."
"…What?"
"……What? Did you get scared because I was too forward?"
Maybe everything had been my misunderstanding. They say when you lock eyes with a woman you dream of marrying her and even imagine having kids with her in your head… Right now, I felt exactly like that.
"Or was my acting too realistic and it freaked you out? Seriously… A guy who writes erotic novels turns out to be a total virgin…."
Eun-yeong's calm tone didn't sound like a lie.
"…If it were Park Eun-yeong, don't you think she'd have done this in that situation?"
She made a show of pulling her pants down again.
"Aah, but I'll admit I went a bit overboard. There was no need to take them off."
Eun-yeong said that and spread her legs wide to the side.
"If we're gonna do it anyway, shouldn't it be a little more realistic? If we just keep our clothes on, isn't that fine?"
With the corner of her mouth slightly raised, Eun-yeong wiggled her finger at me.
"So what are you gonna do now?"
"…Wh-what do you mean, what am I gonna do."
My body trembled with embarrassment, shame, and humiliation. If I hadn't rationalized that this was all part of Eun-yeong's acting, I might have bolted out of the room… no, out of the house right then.
"If it were you—no, what would the protagonist do in this situation? Don't tell me a guy would just stand there watching and jerking off?"
Eun-yeong brought her hand between her legs. She pulled the fabric of her pants to the side and made a show of spreading herself.
"Even if I spread it like this… you wouldn't just watch, right?"
"Haaah…."
My lower body, which had been uncomfortable, now ached quite a bit. It was swollen so much that it wouldn't have been strange if my pants burst.
"…What did you say you'd do?"
"Yeah."
I picked the most harmless option among the many thoughts that had crossed my mind earlier.
"Kyaa!"
I slid my arms under her neck and knees, then stood up in one swift motion.
"First, we need to go to the bed."
The moment I finished speaking, I started walking.
"…And then?"
"Can I throw you?"
"…Throw me?"
"Yeah. You know, in movies… like on a honeymoon? They carry the girl and throw her on the bed and stuff."
"Ah… Sure, whatever."
Her reaction was indifferent. I immediately tossed Eun-yeong onto the bed.
"Hngh!"
The bed shook noisily. So did Eun-yeong's breasts. And so did my heart, spinning wildly out of control.