Gender Ratio Fucked World (5) [Noonas~ I Love You! Kiss Kiss!]
"Aww, he's so cute I could just die."
Lying on my bed, I was watching the hottest male broadcaster, Han Sol-i, do his live stream on my smartphone. His fair face filled the close-up screen, and the chat exploded in real-time.
Something weird stood out in the chat scrolling during Han Sol-i's broadcast. A man getting sexually harassed outside? Did his bodyguards screw up? Or was he out alone?
I'd heard about this on the news. Some guy alone outside got chased off by a granny in her 60s.
"The world's really gone to hell…."
I was deep into Han Sol-i's stream when an alarm blared on my phone.
"Ah… time to go live."
The alarm reminded me it was time to prep for my own broadcast.
"Jung-ah? You there?"
"Uh… yeah? Hold on!"
I opened the door at the Goshiwon Manager Auntie's voice. She glared at me. No surprise there.
"Jung-ah? Your rent for this month hasn't come in yet. How much longer?"
"Ah… sorry, I'll pay it as soon as possible."
"One week. If you can't pay by then, I'm kicking you out for real."
"Sorry…."
I was three days late on rent. I had to make money broadcasting just to catch up.
"Fuck… should I snag a guy and broadcast with him sometime?"
On the streaming site, a thumbnail of a female broadcaster introducing her little brother had drawn a thousand viewers already. She was masked up with sunglasses and a hat, but the "male" label pulled them in like moths.
If only I had a little brother—life would be set. Hell, just having a guy around would qualify me for the Male Support Fund and solve my money woes.
Screw it… no point whining. Time to wash up, head out, and prep for the stream.
I moved to the shower, quickly washed my hair, grabbed my gear, and stepped outside.
But….
"Ah."
"Uh… hi?"
A man was standing right at my door. His voice sounded male, but… really? Most guys dressed sharp. I'd seen them on broadcasts or at Bucheon Station—always looking loaded. Or they were total hikikomori holed up in their rooms.
This guy? No clue. Not dressed up, but not the type to wander out of a rundown goshiwon like this either. With the Male Support Fund paying monthly, who'd slum it here?
We stood there awkwardly, me blanking on what to say.
Wait… I swear I've seen this guy before.
That familiar back… digging through my memory, one photo popped up.
Oh, shit!
It hit me—the viral post from the "cool kids" forum I'd scrolled while tossing in bed today.
The guy from that post that blew up in a day… he was real? The dude in the photo was legit.
Why's he dressed so ragged? As that thought crossed my mind, the man gave a short bow and turned to leave.
"Ah, w-wait a sec!"
"Yes?"
I grabbed him without thinking. I'd always watched Han Sol-i's streams wishing I could see a real guy up close. Now one was right here, and my brain short-circuited.
What do I even say? Keep holding on and chat? But I had no words, just fumbling awkwardly.
"Um, you heading somewhere? To a restaurant?"
"Nah, gotta go to work."
"Ah… I see."
Surprisingly thick wall—he brushed off my question cleanly and kept walking. Fine, whatever, guys are like that.
Streams blow up with a guy on them. Maybe… ask him?
"Um… could you help me out?"
"Huh? Why me?"
"I-I'll pay you! 100,000 won!"
"…Deal."
I roped him in, promising a day's pay to help with my gig. What balls… I couldn't even scrape together 150,000 won, rent was late. But streaming with a guy? Donations should roll in. Fingers crossed.
* * *
We arrived at Bucheon Station. Sure enough, girls were broadcasting outside. Some with selfie sticks or tripods, blasting music and dancing. Can't they keep it down?
"What do I gotta do here?"
"Ah, hold on, not ready yet."
"Okay…."
The guy stared blankly, asking what his job was. Tripod wasn't set, so I asked him to wait while I prepped.
Having a guy here changes everything.
Everyone was eyeing him. A guy out in public was rare enough; at dusk? Mind-blowing. Thought he'd bail, but here he was.
As I finished setup quietly….
"This some kinda internet broadcast?"
"Ah… yeah. You cool with that?"
I hadn't specified the job upfront. Streaming sells faces and names—mess up consent, it's a crime. If he hated it, I'd apologize and send him off safe.
"I'm… not scared of broadcasting, but no weird stuff, right?"
"No way, never!"
"Just… past streamers made guys do dumb missions, got me nervous."
"What psycho bitch drags a guy on stream for missions?"
No one's that deranged—making a guy do hard shit? One complaint and you're done. I swore I wouldn't pull that crap and said it was fine.
"Cool, starting now then. What's your name?"
"Huh? My name?"
I'd just met him today, no clue on his real name… gotta ask before streaming if he has a stage name.
* * *
Internet streamers always pulled the same shit on me. They'd spot me homeless on the street, viewers give missions, pay up front—then ghost. Or pretend to hook you up, end stream, come back and take most back.
That's why I hated this crap. First time hearing "internet broadcast."
Lucky no weird missions promised. But words change—who knows? I was on edge.
"All set. Seong-hoon, what's your name?"
She finished setup, looked at me, asked for a name.
"Uh… Oh Seong-hoon."
"Ah, Seong-hoon? Real name?"
"Yeah."
"Go with your real name?"
"Any issue?"
I asked legit, but she tilted her head.
"Nah, but guys using real names on stream? Safety risk."
"Is it?"
For a bum like me, name or face out there? Whatever. Heard of aliases, but no biggie.
"Real name's fine by me."
"F-for real? You're fearless."
She marveled, grabbed her phone.
"Going live then."
"Yeah… just pay up proper."
Me? Homeless fuck—sell my face or name, who cares. Just the promised 100,000 won, done. Time to monkey around again.