The Exiled Shepherd

"Enjoying yourself? I asked if you were enjoying yourself."

My whole body trembles.

My heart burns like a sea of fire in a crematorium. Fiercely. And then it shatters like remains fed into a bone-crusher. Into pieces.

"Fair enough. If I were him, I suppose I'd be entertained too."

This machine of a bastard just keeps grinning, no matter who drives a fist into his face or grabs him by the collar.

The illustration drawn on the front of the card.

A man in a suit, standing before the glass doors of the lobby.

Resembling me to a thoroughly unpleasant degree.

"Where the hell did they get off handing down a curse like this."

I seized the emcee by the collar and dragged his face close to mine.

"Is this a prophecy? This thing."

I asked in a whisper, low enough that no one else could hear — and the emcee's smile only grew wider.

"Yuhan-nim, your hand! Your right hand......!"

"Seon Yuhan-ssi, stop it, stop......! What are you trying to do......!"

"No, why of all things that hand...... Seon Yuhan-ssi, please just hold it in, even if you're furious. What if you provoke him for no reason and end up getting hurt for it......"

"Hah......"

In the end, I let go.

Only then did the bandage, soaked red once more, come into view, and my severed ring finger began to ache — belatedly, as if it had just remembered.

Honestly.

After all that talk about how I could never escape Yu Hyeonjae's orbit, and whatever else — was this an indiscriminate curse dealt out roughly the same to anyone and everyone, or was it a prophecy issued only to someone fated for exactly this?

I read the question over again, calmly this time.

Me?

I would actually do something like that?

It makes no sense to me.

Why would I ever do such a thing. No matter how many times I come back to life......

I stared for a while at the emcee's face — that grating, infuriating smile — and then opened my mouth.

"The answer."

"Yes, Seon Yuhan-nim. Please give us your answer."

"If I ever find out, I'll tell you."

"Seon Yuhan-nim."

"What."

"That is incorrect."

"I know."

There are moments when you know a road is the wrong one, and still you cannot help but walk it.

There are people like that.

Perhaps such a moment will come for me too someday, and I too will become one of those people.

"Congratulations. Seon Yuhan-nim has completed one 'Life.'"

The emcee handed over a ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠single, whole gold coin.

"Then I suppose it's my turn to solve one."

While the others took their turns at 'True Stories', I played 'Garden of Psyche'.

"...Oh. You're going to watch me play? Fair warning, something scary might come up, so brace yourself."

To earn the gold coin that would cover Jeong Jiho's share.

I didn't want to make anyone else do it. None of them should ever have to bear a curse like that one.

"......"

The child sat beside me the entire time I played 'Garden of Psyche', eyes never once leaving the screen.

"Uh, this part here — probably better if you don't look...... it's a little cruel."

What on earth was so entertaining about it.

Granted, it had to beat 'True Stories', where grown adults repeated the same scripted lines like parrots. Even so, I was simply glad that this time, at least, the child had come close to me without seeming all that uncomfortable.

I must be hiding it well.

......Whatever it happens to be.

"Hm?"

Tap, tap.

The child lightly touched my forearm and pointed at the screen.

"Ah — what was that thing just now?"

The black shadow that had flickered into view for an instant as my avatar rounded a corner in the maze.

Root.

"Hard to say."

What was I supposed to call it?

A watcher who observes me without cease? An invader that slips into my flesh? A murderer who strips away the tree's seeds?

"I don't really know either. But......"

One thing was certain.

"He's the only ally I've got."

I whispered it into the child's ear like a secret, then shook my head.

"No, I mean. My character in there. I'm on his side."

Why had I said that?

It didn't sound like something I would say. It was unmistakably my voice, and yet it wasn't mine.

I shouldn't say things like that.

What stands in there is nothing more than a character.

The thing that chews through bull-shaped fertilizer, that scrapes at the floor in a thirst it cannot endure, that stares and stares at the black tank which might be its own cradle, that scores three hundred sixty-six tally marks into the wall while carrying a tree inside its body — the thing that will become the fertile soil of that pale white tree.

That thing is not me.

"The Night of Awakening has arrived."

One after another — the Yuwi Guild co-CEO, the certified public accountant, the freelance magician, the Moment O'Clock MD, and the NeoSoft employee — each claimed their gold coin, and then we went straight into the final game, 'Shepherd's Silence'.

"Seon Yuhan-nim, you are the 'Shepherd'."

"Hah."

Was it random, or did the emcee assign it?

"Drive out every wolf — every parasitic vermin that has slunk into your pasture to prey upon your sheep. And it must be you who slaughters the sheep."

What an utterly thuggish set of rules.

"Once in your life, in the dead of night, you may shield a single sheep from a wolf's attack. Take care that you do not, by mistake, shield a wolf instead."

It was almost admirable — that man had won even under conditions that amounted to being ordered to lie down, lose, and die like a good loser.

"The dark night has receded, and a new day has dawned."

Thanks to the insurance policy of one 'Life' token, nobody's face was all that grim.

Last time, it had been nothing but a deathbed from start to finish.

"I'm a sheep."

"I'm... apparently a wolf."

"Me too. Wolf."

"I'm a sheep, me."

"Me too...... a sheep......"

Every single one of them was telling the truth, no less.

"Ah, as for me... I was assigned the role of... Shepherd."

I had become plenty honest myself.

"Eh? What are you saying? A role like that exists?"

"Yes...... It seems there was a hidden role, besides the wolves and the sheep."

"Wow, seriously...... where does something like that even come from? No, wait — and why isn't that written in the diary either? You're supposed to write this stuff down, that's what makes it useful. Honestly."

Well, that would be because I didn't write it.

If I handed over every last answer, what would that make me — a human being?

Someone who knows the labyrinth suspiciously well, and yet only ever knows a handful of floors — as if he had gone exactly that far and then turned back around.

I wanted to look like that.

"I suppose it should be treated as something to reference now and then, nothing more. Don't lean on it too heavily."

And so for certain floors, I had simply cut the information out altogether.

The parking lot where the Buddha appears, for instance. Or the Strategy Planning Department, where the gambler waits.

If a floor was manageable — nothing I couldn't shake off by the teeth without a diary — then it was far more natural for me to just step forward and handle it myself.

It would also make it easier for my companions to trust what I said later on.

"First of all, please go ahead and exile me. Don't worry about it too much."

"Oh — then...... I'll vote for Yuhan-nim. I'm sorry, but......"

"There's nothing to apologize for. I'm going to do it regardless."

"Yes. Seon Yuhan-nim, one vote. Seon Yuhan-nim is currently the top-voted player, scheduled for exile."

"I'll vote as well. For Seon Yuhan-ssi."

One by one the votes piled up, and the instant they passed the majority, exile was confirmed — before night had even fallen.

"Yes. Seon Yuhan-nim, four votes. Exile is confirmed."

The emcee, long staff in hand, approached.

"Here. My 'Life'."

I handed the gold coin back.

"Yes. Seon Yuhan-nim has offset the penalty of 'Shepherd's Silence' with one 'Life'."

So said Hosu, the 'Life' back in his keeping.

"The exiled Seon Yuhan-nim will now watch over the pasture from beyond its bounds. May you enjoy your freedom beyond the fence."

Those who leave the pasture can never return to it.

It seemed to hold true even when the penalty was offset.

The exiled is the exiled.

"Whoa, he just vanished?"

"He's not...... dead, right? He said he'd be watching over us?"

"I'd assume so. It appears he's simply invisible to our eyes."

From this moment on, I could not ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠be seen by theirs.

"......The sun is setting again......"

"......Choi Jaeha-ssi......"

"......Confirmed as the top-voted player......"

How tedious.

It ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠was, indeed, not fun. It was, indeed, a sad thing.

Knowing everything is.

"Congratulations. Yu Hyeonjae-nim, Lee Jinsu-nim, and Hwang Juyeon-nim have driven out every predator and every exploiter that lurked within the pasture. The sheep are silent no more."

"Is there...... a separate reward for winning?"

At Hwang Juyeon's question, the emcee tilted his head.

"I don't quite understand. Is there a reward greater than life itself?"

The emcee, ever so obliging, granted us one last laugh as we left.

A hollow laugh ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠is still a laugh.

"Did you enjoy the games I prepared for you?"

At Hosu's question, Choi Jaeha and Lee Nahyun rolled their eyes skyward.

"Uh, um, yes, it was fun. Right."

"Uhh, yes...... It was...... fun......"

"What fun is there in playing when you already know everything?"

He really was being petulant, even while seeing us off.

"Goodbye, Seon Yuhan-nim, Yu Hyeonjae-nim, Lee Nahyun-nim, Lee Jinsu-nim, Jeong Jiho-nim, Choi Jaeha-nim, and Hwang Juyeon-nim."

Hosu, with his face like a kindly shepherd, stood quietly and watched us until the emergency exit door swung shut.

With the eyes of a silent sheep.

"Uuugh, please, please let it be the 1st floor. Right?"

"Yes. It might genuinely be. Not that this notebook should be trusted too far...... but in any case, there's no record for the next floor."

That was only because I'd been unable to write it, not because I'd chosen not to — but the wish for the 1st floor was entirely sincere.

Clunk.

Of course, I also knew perfectly well that the labyrinth was no dreamland where wishes came true just because you made them.

"Huh? It's so dark in here?"

"Jiho, hold my hand tight."

"Don't tell me this is another......?"

The instant I fumbled my phone's flashlight on, letters and numbers swam into view.

B3.

"A parking lot, agai—"

―Riiiiiiiiiiing!

And then a shrill alarm split through our ears.

Along with a thick, acrid smell of burning rubber.