Kneel, You Pathetic Ranker
[Would you like to log in as the character 'Hura'?]
Would you like to log in as the character Hura?
"Yeah."
[Welcome to the Fantasy World.]
Welcome to the Fantasy World.
Whoosh—
A sweltering heat washed over him. The scorching sun blazed down on a barren rocky desert, like a scene straight out of an old Western movie.
"Ah, Hura! There you are!"
Baek Bal Baek Jung, licking an ice cream cone, spotted him and hurried over.
"Yeah. Hey, Baek Bal Baek Jung. Ready for our exciting adventure?"
"Haha, of course. But first, we've got something to take care of, right?"
"Huh? Take care of what?"
"Don't you remember? We had a ton of naengmyeon ingredients left over, so we decided to sell them off today before heading out."
"Oh."
He was right. Yesterday's crowd had been bigger than expected, so he'd restocked massively on naengmyeon ingredients. He'd made huge batches of broth, noodles, and sauce, leaving a surplus even after closing.
Couldn't lug it all around, but tossing it felt like a waste. So they'd planned to quickly clear out the leftovers today.
"Sigh... Fine. Let's sell off what's left and go. Can't just throw it away."
Tsk. For some reason, he really didn't feel like vending today. After six nonstop hours serving hordes of customers yesterday, the whole merchant gig was exhausting. Having to do it in-game too? He'd been itching for adventure today.
Men's hearts were fickle reeds. Just yesterday, naengmyeon sales had been a blast.
Whatever. Knock it out quick.
He pulled half-fried eggs and tteokbokki from his inventory using Cooking Clone Art.
"Cooking Summon."
Poof—
"Good day, Master."
"Yeah. No time to waste—get up and let's move."
He led the three summons to yesterday's street stall. Even from afar, a line of people was already forming.
"Whew. Already a crowd like that."
Where'd they all come from? The village had been dead quiet yesterday.
The queued customers recognized them and started buzzing.
What were they doing lining up so early? What if he hadn't shown?
Grouse, grouse—
Grouse, grouse—
Ignoring the stares, he tried to head to the stall when someone piped up.
"Um, Hura? No bibim naengmyeon today?"
He glared fiercely. "What'd you say?"
"Bibim naengmyeon. Just wondering if you're doing any."
"...Did I hear that right? Bibim naengmyeon?!"
"Uh... s-sorry—"
"Can't you read the menu?!" He jabbed at it.
[Mul Naengmyeon - 5 silver or info]
[No bibim naengmyeon. Stop asking.]
He advanced on the questioning customer step by step; she flinched and backed away.
He wasn't in a great mood. After six hours of grueling labor, he'd come home ready for adventure—only to dive back into hated vending.
"Bibim faction, huh?"
"N-not exactly. I like mul naengmyeon too, but bibim's great..."
And now some random bibim zealot causing trouble. No roots, no class.
"Oh, you want bibim that bad?"
"N-no, just curious."
"If you're that desperate for bibim, go eat bibim guksu somewhere else."
"...Urk."
Suddenly, someone gripped his shoulder.
"Can't let that slide. Even from you, Hura."
Baek Bal Baek Jung, deadly serious.
"Oho... Baek Bal Baek Jung, a rootless bibim factionist? Betrayal hits hard."
He slapped the hand away, sneering coldly.
"Mul's tasty, but bibim holds its own."
"How'd a bibim guy eat my mul so well?"
"Bibim's killer with meat."
"We got meat here right now?"
"...Pity you can't grasp bibim's beauty."
Sizzle— Sparks flew as eyes locked.
"Boss, time to vend!"
"Customers waiting."
Tteok Sun-i and Geum Taeyang wedged between them. He glanced at the anxious, murmuring line.
"......"
He shot Baek Bal Baek Jung a look, then whipped away. Ditto for the archer.
"Tch."
"Tsk."
Stomping to the kitchen, he barked.
"Geum Taeyang."
"Yes, boss."
"Announce we're vending till ingredients run out, then start."
"Got it."
"Rest as yesterday."
"Yep!"
"Hurry and clear it."
Baek Bal Baek Jung slipped in after—dish duty. They eyed each other.
"...Hmph."
"...Tch."
Hura sat and started mul naengmyeon; Baek Bal Baek Jung scrubbed.
"...Hura."
"What? Gonna claim mul faction now?"
"Hmph. As if. Lend me that water-spouting horn for dishes."
"Tch. Here."
"Tsk. I'll use it well and return it."
"Hmph. Careful, it's cold."
Then silence, clatter of work filling the kitchen.
* * *
"Haa... Where the hell'd he hide?"
A blonde woman sighed over a continent map dotted with X's.
"Three thousand gold bounty, and not a peep?"
She checked the Bounty Board system window—Fantasy World's reward hub.
"Tsk. Raise it more?" She added 2k gold. Total: 5k.
Not for capture or kill—just location tips. Insanely high for that. Yet zero sightings.
"...He didn't quit, did he?"
"That'd suck..."
Ding!
Message received.
"What now."
Bounty Board message: Regarding your bounty request, notice from Western Branch—
Raised it and boom. "...Working fast."
No high hopes—usually lookalikes.
She skimmed.
-Tip from Nimal Village.
"Nimal Village? Where's that?"
Attached photo: Turbaned, sunglassed Middle Eastern-looking guy slurping ice cream.
"......"
Eyes widened. "...Found you! Finally!"
No time to celebrate. She pinpointed Nimal Village.
"Damn, northwest boonies? So far."
Pocketed map, leaped up.
"Baek Bal Baek Jung. Nail you, and top 10's mine!"
Boom— Blonde hair flying, she rocketed skyward. Ground beneath turned to ash, scattering.
She'd sat on a colossal monster corpse—mistakable for earth.
"Freshen up and wait! Uwahahaha!"
Storming through ash, she charged with earth-shaking strides, cratering the ground.
* * *
Clink— Clink—
Silent kitchen, just dish sounds. Hura cleared his throat.
"Ahem. Uh, Baek Bal Baek Jung."
"What?"
"Not that, but..." He offered a stainless bowl. "Taste test?"
"...What's this?"
"Ahem. Bibim naengmyeon. Tried with leftover sauce."
Baek Bal Baek Jung paused, stared blankly.
"...Hura."
"Take it. Arm's tiring."
"Ah, sure."
Glancing between bowl and Hura, he scratched his head as Hura spoke awkwardly.
"...Sorry for calling bibim rootless. Was on edge."
"No, my bad for dissing bibim."
"Bibim's tasty too."
"Yeah. Different flavors. Mul and bibim both great."
"Exactly. Different ain't wrong."
They smiled.
"Just try it. Hope it's good."
"How could it not be."
Baek Bal Baek Jung slurped a vacuuming chopstickful, grinned, nodded.
"Delicious, Hura."
"Good."
Slurp— Slurrrp— Watching him devour red-tinged buckwheat, Hura remembered another apology.
"Baek Bal Baek Jung."
He gulped noodles. "Yes, Hura."
"Archer, so good eyes?"
"Best scout around."
"Later, find someone for me?"
"Who?"
"That lady I snapped at. Wanna give her bibim too."
"Of course."
Warm smiles exchanged.
Then—
-Crash!
-What the fuck! Know who I am?
-Sir, please don't.
-Think you can run a dump like this and get away?
-Sir, calm down.
-Calm? Boss out here!
-Bang!
-Murmurs—
Sudden commotion outside.
"What?"
"Check it out."
They rushed out. Counter smashed like hammered; Geum Taeyang dangled by collar from a brute.
Lightweight? Nah—the guy hoisted him like a doll.
"Geum Taeyang!"
Hura's eyes blazed. Dare touch him?
"Ha. Had to trash the place to draw you out. You the boss?"
Mystery man flung Geum Taeyang, stomped toward Hura. Hulking beyond Beda—wall-walking. Iron-hard arms, double-man build. Towering over 2m, up Hura had to crane. Crushing presence. Tense air. Top-tier aura.
Normally he'd avert eyes, but rage forbade. Wanted to slap him silly, but needed facts first.
"What's the issue, sir."
"That thug punk's spouting bullshit. Can't control staff?"
Poked Hura's head repeatedly.
Crunch— Fist clenched, jaw tendons bulged.
"This fucker—"
Hura stopped raging Baek Bal Baek Jung with a hand. Tteok Sun-i flanked him.
Trouble customer was still customer. Maybe—just maybe—Geum Taeyang erred.
Geum Taeyang rolled to his side, dirtied. Spotting soiled white suit boiled Hura's blood.
"Sorry, boss."
"Nothing to sorry. Spill."
"Yes."
Geum Taeyang explained: Customer tried info for naengmyeon. All duplicates from prior customers. Fourth demand triggered meltdown.
"...Sir, we take info for 5 silver. Can't count duplicates as payment."
"You shits mocking me?"
Hand out— Whoosh— Massive double-headed axe flew from table to grip. Toy-sized compared. Slammed ground.
"Know who I am?!"
Murmurs swelled, "Ranker" among them.
Bang! Adjacent table—wood, stone base split like tofu. Axe buried deep, cracks spidered.
"I'm Blood Axe Thrower, soloed Twin Head Ogre! Rank 997!"
Buzz intensified.
"Nice talk, now bring 20 naengmyeon. 20 gold apology fee, we're square."
"...Like my naengmyeon?" Glanced up—floating heart confirmed.
"Edible."
"Good."
Sneer twisted. "Lucky, you retarded fuck."
"...What?" Eyebrow twitched.
"Blood Axe Thrower my ass. Read wuxia novels?"
"Crazy?"
"I'd stomp you better barefoot. Worthless shitstain."
"Wha—"
"Customization's gross. Real life's dogshit for you, huh?"
"...! Wanna die?"
"Kill me. You touch my Taeyang?!"
"You fuck!"
Axe flashed high, sun-glinting blade menacing.
Hura didn't flinch. Death-glared.
Just murmured:
"Kneel."
Halt.
Axe froze mid-swing. Eyes bulged.
Thud.
He crumpled to knees.