Tornado Tteokbokki Assault
The world outside the village grew bitterly cold after sunset. Especially heading north, the blizzard intensified, and the temperature plummeted further. Fierce winds whistled past their ears. On top of that, thick snow squalls blotted out the moon, plunging everything into pitch darkness. It was so disorienting that even figuring out if they were on the right path was a challenge.
"Hahaha!"
But that was for ordinary folk. This monstrous priest wasn't fazed in the slightest.
"Hold on tight!"
Thud-thud-thud!
The Crying Priest illuminated the way with holy light, charging through the blizzard at breakneck speed.
"Whoaaa!"
I clung desperately to the priest's broad back, flapping like a cape in the gale. Cooking Summon was off to maximize our speed.
"Hahaha! It's a holy war, you foolish heretics!"
The Crying Priest bellowed triumphantly as he ran, his excitement ringing in my ears—now buzzing with tinnitus in one side.
"Sinners, come out and face Yupinel's judgment!"
"Aaaah! Calm down, you maniac!"
Thanks to him, we reached our destination in record time. What would've taken half a day on foot? Thirty minutes flat, courtesy of our proud lunatic.
"Ughhh... I'm dying..."
I finally slid off the priest's back like goo when he came to a stop.
Ignoring me, the Crying Priest inspected the "obstacle" the innkeeper had mentioned.
Tap-tap.
"Hmm..."
He tapped it thoughtfully. Before the halted priest stood jagged spires of pure white ice, forming a massive ice wall as tall as the village palisades, blocking travelers' paths. It stretched so wide its ends vanished into the gloom. Not quite the Great Wall, but a solid hundred-ri barrier at least.
Tap-tap.
After prodding the frosty surface a few more times, the priest spoke.
"Pretty sturdy. Most attacks wouldn't even scratch it."
Then he whipped out his massive hammer and smashed it.
BOOM!!
The thick ice shattered like glass, chunks crumbling in a cascade.
"...Sturdy, huh?"
"Let's head in. Follow at a leisurely pace."
Without a proper reply, the Crying Priest shoved his way inside. Dressed like that, he looked like an eager hunter fretting his prized quarry might slip away.
"You coming?"
He poked his head back out, calling me. He resembled an excited kid at an amusement park.
"...You said follow slowly."
"Not too slowly."
"Hold on a sec."
I soothed the middle-aged man whose eyes sparkled like he was about to ride a rollercoaster, then pulled a carrot from my inventory and crunched into it. Made from Desert Rose, it was Nature's Carrot—one that dramatically sharpened eyesight. The hero that let me take down Blood Axe Thrower. Better safe than sorry. I'd prepped these in my inn room while waiting for the priest, figuring the Ice Devil's turf demanded precautions.
Munching the carrot, I also summoned tteokbokki and a fried egg.
"Cooking Summon."
Pop!
"All well, Master?"
"Yeah. Priest's waiting—hurry up."
"Already here?"
"Yep."
Geum Taeyang and Tteoksoon-i glanced around curiously and followed me.
Crunch-crunch.
We trudged through the shattered ice into the thick wall.
"From what the innkeeper said, and the snow buildup, this wall's less than a day old."
"I see."
"Meaning the Ice Devil hasn't fully recovered its mana yet—high chance."
The Crying Priest explained eagerly, leading the way. Inside the ice wall was utter silence—no blizzard, just stillness. Only our footsteps echoed. With the storm gone, the moon shone clearly overhead—a blessing for visibility. Spiky white ice thorns jutted from the ground like barbs, though not as tall as the wall; mostly human height. We picked our way carefully between them.
"Heh heh... where are you hiding?"
The Crying Priest twirled his massive hammer—the one that pulverized zombies—muttering to himself.
"Hide tight~ I see your hair~"
...Who's the villain here? I shook my head.
I tapped a protruding ice spike. Rock-hard and bitingly cold, even a light touch chilled my fingers to the bone. This Ice Devil was no pushover.
Then—a gaunt something materialized in the air ahead, hurtling toward the leading priest at blinding speed. A razor-sharp ice chunk. Without Nature's Carrot, I wouldn't have seen it.
"Priest!"
But instead of dodging, the Crying Priest charged straight at it, grinning ear to ear.
"Found you!"
Floating in the direction the ice came from was its caster.
Clang!
The priest shouldered aside the incoming shard and yanked back his hammer.
"Poor soul. Wretched one."
Thump!
He kicked off the ground, leaping skyward in an instant.
"Receive Yupinel's grace!"
His hammer flashed.
Shatter!
The Ice Devil that launched the ice shard exploded into fragments. So effortlessly it felt anticlimactic.
"...Is that it?"
I approached the priest as he thudded down.
"Yeah. Too easy."
He smacked his lips in disappointment, not a tear in sight.
"Would be a letdown if that's all."
Then the ice thorns everywhere began to quiver. The vibration spread to the ground.
"Wh-what now?"
"Master!"
Geum Taeyang and Tteoksoon-i swiftly encircled me. The spikes twisted, taking form and moving.
Crack-grind-crunch!
They morphed into human shapes.
"Tteoksoon-i! Smash 'em!"
"Yes!"
Tteoksoon-i scattered her red threads wide, cleaving dozens of ice statues before they fully formed.
But dozens, hundreds more remained. They became ice soldiers with swords and spears, mages swinging staves, archers nocking arrows—each distinct.
"...This is insane."
The Crying Priest, meanwhile, grinned in satisfaction. Golden tears welled in his eyes.
"Now that's more like it."
Vroom-screech.
A sleek black car pulled up in front of the apartment. Jihyun bowed to Sera at the wheel.
"Thanks for the ride."
"No biggie."
"And dinner too..."
"Whatever."
Sera waved it off, but her eyes were puffy like bee stings.
"Gimme your phone."
"...My phone?"
"No chit-chat."
"Here."
Sera snatched Jihyun's phone and punched in her number.
"Call anytime you need. Dinner's on me."
"R-really? Anytime?"
"Yup. Anytime. Any hour. Always. Forever."
"...Thanks."
Jihyun clutched the returned phone tightly, then mumbled hesitantly.
"...Unnie."
That soft word made tears surge in Sera again. She hid them behind sunglasses, feigning nonchalance.
"Y'know, driving at night in shades is dangerous."
"...Shut it."
The cheeky advice from someone six years younger. Sera shooed her out.
"It's late. Your parents'll worry. Go on."
"Okay."
Jihyun hopped out, then called through the open window.
"Um... Unnie."
"What."
"Can I... really call anytime?"
Her clasped hands fidgeted.
"...Wanna die?"
"H-huh?"
"Would I lie?"
"Oh, then..."
"Don't wanna die? Text once a day. Even nonsense. Got it?"
Jihyun beamed at the "threat."
"Yes!"
Sera stared blankly at that radiant smile—like a flower blooming—then snapped to and peeled out.
"Ahem. I'm off!"
"Bye! I'll text!"
Vroom!
The black car glided away. Jihyun checked her contacts.
-My Friend Hura
-Sera Unnie
"......"
Two friends now. The first raised her voice for her; the second shed tears. Jihyun gazed a moment, then hugged the phone close. Their warmth seeped in.
"Poor souls. Become ash and scatter!"
The Crying Priest whirled his hammer, mercilessly shredding ice soldiers. Golden tears flew with each swing.
"...Laugh after crying, and horns grow on your butt."
"Master, the priest's the opposite."
"What about cry after laughing?"
"That's just a maniac."
Geum Taeyang blocked incoming foes; Tteoksoon-i slashed with red threads, severing torsos from legs. Individually weak, but their numbers were the issue. Luckily, the priest was blendering most, so few reached us.
"Hura-nim!"
The Crying Priest called from afar.
"Yes!"
"You can hold, right?!"
"...Probably!"
"Summoning in masses to stall—confirms mana not recovered!"
"Good!"
"I'll take out the main body fast! Hold till then!"
"Got it!"
"Right!"
Thud!
Holy light burst from him; he rocketed off like a compass-guided missile.
"Hahaha! Vile devil! Wicked heretic! Face Yupinel's judgment!"
Bowling over ice soldiers en route was bonus.
With the maniac gone, the rest turned to us. Plenty left.
"...Been a while since we three fought together, huh?"
"Yes!"
"Missed it!"
"Let's play."
I shared my inner darkness with them.
"Heh heh heh..."
"Heh heh..."
"Hee hee heh!"
Ting! Ting!
Ice soldiers' spells and arrows pinged off Geum Taeyang's shield.
"Hah!"
He swung it, deflecting them into sword-wielding foes. Stunned soldiers shattered under his charge.
Tteoksoon-i needled with threads or wrapped them around her fist for punches.
"Hyah!"
Whoosh!
Red energy lanced out, pulverizing a line of enemies.
"Hahaha!"
Good kids.
Me? Couldn't dent the ice soldiers directly—they felt like iron lumps.
"Heh heh heh..."
Still, I grinned. I could set the stage.
"Summon."
I dove into the horde with my Moonlight Frying Pan, Nature's Carrot making their blades, spears, arrows, and spells sloooow.
"Cooking Clone Art! Cooking Throw!"
Cooking Throw
Nature's Tteokbokki ★★☆☆☆: Enemies melt in the scorching heat.
Melted foes become sticky lava on the ground, sealing enemy movement.
I weaved through them, spamming Cooking Throw. Occasionally smacking noggins.
"Take this, punk!"
Moonlight Frying Pan effect: Enemy stunned with 100% probability.
Aaah—refreshing. That satisfying thwack. Yeah, this is the stuff.
Soon, lava pools dotted the area. Not scorching hot, but enough to snag ice soldiers' feet, leaving them flailing.
"Hahaha! Kids!"
Stage set.
"Kee hee hee!"
"Heh heh heh!"
Go wild.
Geum Taeyang raised his shield overhead; Tteoksoon-i hopped atop lightly.
"Kahaha! Master! Lower it!"
"Yep!"
"Hee hee! Here we gooo! TORNADO!!"
Atop the shield, Tteoksoon-i spun like a top. Red threads whirled with her, forming a crimson vortex. The red whirlwind lashed like a tongue, shredding everything in its path. Geum Taeyang hustled, delivering the blender-vortex everywhere.
Ice soldiers mulched like in a mixer.
"Kyahaha!"
"Ee hee hee!"
"Whoohahaha! Sweep 'em all!"
Our merry laughter echoed with the red whirlwind across the field.