Chapter 137
Chapter 137
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Translator: Ryuma
Chapter: 137
Chapter Title: The Forgotten Name
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"When you were born, the physician said the mother's life was in danger."
"…Ah……."
The weight of the story returned, hardening my son's face. Sedes stroked Lianus's head as if it were nothing and continued.
"I naturally tried to save her. But… whether it was her persistent persuasion that worked or not, when the moment came, I couldn't decide right away. I hesitated, wondering if I should carelessly erase her miracle."
"……."
"Right before my eyes, my lover and my child were dying. But I could only save one, and I had to decide before it was too late. Rian, I'm sorry, but… in the end, I chose your mother over you."
Lianus nodded slowly.
Even he would have saved his beloved lover over a child he hadn't even made eye contact with. So he could understand.
"But… the moment I made that decision, our eyes met."
'Sedi, what about our child?'
Your voice suddenly flooded my mind, so vivid yet scattering like ink dropped in water.
It exists there, but diluted by time, by how much the child has grown, now I can only believe it's there….
"I… reflexively answered her question. That the child was safe. That I had used the elixir. That there was no need to worry."
Sedes paused, taking a deep, slow breath. He didn't want to be overcome by emotion, but thinking back made his eyes burn unexpectedly.
But parents, by nature, hesitate to show tears before their children.
He hadn't been a proper parent even once, but apparently he still had his pride as one—tears didn't fall.
"Ah……."
But then a small warmth brushed his cheek, twisting his face.
"Rian, I… I……."
'Sedi, I love you.'
A smile like the sun that lit his world flashed by.
"I still can't forget the radiant smile she gave to my lie."
'I… I love you too, Natura.'
'Please love our child too.'
What had he said in response? No, he hadn't responded. More precisely, he couldn't.
The one who would hear his answer had already covered her ears.
"…Rian."
"Sniff… Yes."
Before he knew it, his son was sniffling in his place, tears dropping one by one.
"You asked if I wasn't hateful."
"……."
"Even if I could go back to that day, I'd use the elixir on you. It'd be even better if I didn't waste time agonizing like an idiot. Who knows, maybe I'd throw away my pride and beg the Grand Duke for one more elixir."
"…Sniff."
"But that's all in the past now. If I'd saved her then, she might have been disappointed in me. I might never have seen that smile again. Saying it like this… it sounds like I saved you entirely for her sake. Do you hate a father like this?"
"Ugh, ah, no, nooo, sniff, ugh, uwaaaan-!"
Lianus couldn't hold back the sobs pouring out and finally wailed openly. Sedes panicked at his sudden outburst but quickly pulled him into his arms and patted him.
It was clumsy, but so tender that Lianus cried even harder.
The young prince's sobs only subsided after a long while.
Sedes savored the comfortable silence a bit longer, then gently wiped the lingering tears from Lianus's eyes before slowly speaking.
"Lianus."
"Hic, yes, hic, y-yes……."
"May I call you Lus?"
"Hic, yes, yes… really, I'd like that."
"Actually, I planned to name you Lus, just as your mother called you. It means 'light'."
"Th-then, hic, why did you change it?"
"…The Queen went into premature labor. Lawrence was born even earlier than your birth time."
"…Sniff… yes……."
"I learned that the Queen had pushed herself to give Lawrence the position of 1st Prince. I was angry about it. Of course, I don't hate Lawrence. The child is blameless. Ah, you've cried a lot—have some tea."
"…I-I didn't cry that much."
Lianus flushed. But even as he said it, he meekly accepted and sipped the tea Sedes offered.
"Changing your name was purely my stubbornness. It was undeniable that your mother should have been the 1st Queen and you the 1st Prince. But she was already gone, and for your sake—with your power so terribly weak—I couldn't claim you were the 1st Prince."
"So… that's why you named me Rian?"
"Do you know what Rian means?"
"Not really… I just heard it implies 'king'."
"Did that child tell you?"
"Yes."
"…That kid knows everything."
Sedes murmured quietly, reminded that Nihil was well-versed even in magic.
"The word 'Rian' can mean 'young king' but also 'Crown Prince'. It's a name often given to the 1st Prince, who has first claim to succession. Our kingdom's system doesn't strictly rank the succession rights of 1st and 2nd Princes… but putting 'Rian' in your name was my own little rebellion."
Sedes added quickly, lest Lianus misunderstand.
"Lus, I cherish you, but I can't push you as Crown Prince without reason. And though it wasn't natural, Lawrence is still your older brother—that doesn't change. Forgive me for not taking sides."
"Your Majesty, don't worry about that. Honestly, I still don't know much about the throne. And now that I think about it, if Mother miraculously conceived me… as a quarter-blood, isn't it nearly impossible for me to have children too…?"
"……!"
Sedes's pupils trembled faintly. He never imagined his mere 7-year-old son would hear talk of being infertile.
Lianus smiled awkwardly, wondering if he'd spoken out of turn, and comforted his father.
"Don't worry too much, Your Majesty. Older Brother will have children."
"……."
"How do babies come to be?"
"……."
The kelp puffed up taut nearly made him lose his reason enough to radiate killing intent, but Lianus's beaming smile averted the worst.
"Nil, am I… really that bad…?"
Lianus asked if his face was so messed up that Sir Evan would radiate killing intent, but Nihil shook his head no and scooped him up.
He planned to chew out the dog daddy later for making the kid cry, but not now. For eyes so puffy, the kitten seemed in pretty good spirits.
"Nil."
"……?"
Nihil looked up at the short vibration traveling through his body.
The kitten's beaming face twisted as if about to cry any second.
"What's wrong, Rian?"
"Nil……."
"Yeah."
"Sir Evan… is calling."
"……Ignore him."
Nihil glanced at Evan and turned away sharply, striding ahead. But after two steps, his nape was grabbed, and a large hand blocked his view.
A steady vibration came through the hand covering his eyes.
Nihil calculated the length and intensity to guess Evan's words and responded roughly.
Tell me honestly! Can you hear or not!
"I hear just fine, so stop yelling. My ears will go deaf."
Really?
"I said yes."
Then, @##$$#&*@&*%^@#!@#$*$##$$*$^%
The vibration through his hand was too long. Even he couldn't predict something this extended. And it was probably nonsense on purpose to prevent prediction.
Nihil replied offhandedly.
"…Enough barking, dog. Let's go."
His view brightened, revealing the dog glaring down with a twisted face.
Evan's lips moved again.
'Damn… feral cat brat…….'
Nihil closed his eyes.
"Ack, Nil! Let me do that too!"
The kitten scurried over and snatched the herb bundle he'd brought.
"…Rian, my hands and feet are fine."
Nihil spoke reluctantly to the kitten treating him like a critical patient and tending to him.
"And that's for now. Gonna grind herbs—wanna try?"
"Yeah! I'll do it!"
Lianus nodded and took the mortar, vigorously grinding the herbs. But his gaze stayed on Nihil, not the herbs.
"Nil."
"Yeah."
"Those eyes… why do they keep looking at mana?"
Lianus tilted his head, puzzled by Nihil staring with white pupils—except when servants were around.
"…Bothering you that much?"
Nihil asked, reverting his eyes to normal.
Lianus was fascinated by the paint-spreading change and unconsciously brushed Nihil's eye area. His friend gently closed the touched eye, but the other stared persistently at his face.
No, precisely at his lips.
Knowing it was to read his lip shape for conversation, Lianus bit his lip self-consciously.
"Nil, if you have something to say, I'll signal you—so relax a bit. Um, or should I hold your hand tight?"
Lianus took Nihil's hand as he spoke. His friend could tell if he was speaking or not just from vibrations through the hand.
If Sir Evan hadn't noticed first, he might not have realized his friend's hearing issue. It was bittersweet, but his friend was that remarkable.
He knew his friend's thorough concealment stemmed from not wanting to worry others. But it also felt like a wild animal's instinct to hide weakness, which nagged at him.
"Sir Evan's here, and Sir Frederick too—no need to be so on guard."
"Haha, that's right. You've got me."
"……."
Frederick emerged from behind the kids, laughing heartily, but Nihil didn't reply. No—he couldn't, since he hadn't heard.
"Who said come out."
But even without hearing, a response came eventually.
Nihil stared straight into Lianus's eyes—more precisely, at Frederick's reflection in them—and continued.
"Want to get hit again?"
Frederick rubbed his swollen cheek and smiled awkwardly.