Lingerie
Only then, at Hyunji's offer to buy me a gift, did it occur to me that I'd been showing up in nearly the same style every time we met. Most of what I owned had been bought to survive, not to look good.
"Fair enough. I really have been wearing almost the same thing every time."
"Ah! Th-that's not what I meant. I just wanted to see you in other clothes..."
"All right. Pick something for me later. This place is far too expensive."
"...It's fine. I-I'll buy you a few outfits..."
I understood how she felt. I'd given her a gift for the same reason—because I wanted to buy her something, anything. That didn't mean I intended to beam and accept whatever she handed me.
"Hyunji."
"...Yes."
"I know how you feel. But would you want the people around us thinking I'm with you for your money?"
"...You'd never do that... Please don't think of it that way..."
"Right. I like you. I don't like your money. And that money's your mother's, isn't it?"
"...It is."
"I think we're fine just as we are. That doesn't mean I mean to brush your feelings aside."
"I-I don't think that... I know your heart well enough..."
"Then we're good. You understand what I'm saying?"
I quietly took her hand. Hyunji kept her head bowed, holding mine, and gave a small nod.
"I'll really... wear them carefully."
"How many times am I even going to get to wear them?"
"Oh, then I'll wear them at home every day."
"...That'd be even more uncomfortable."
"I have to show my friends. Oh, right."
With that she stopped dead and started watching my face.
"What's wrong?"
"Th-there's something I need to tell you..."
"What is it, all of a sudden?"
"It's..."
She checked my expression once more, swallowed hard, and parted those pretty lips.
"I... I told my friends about you."
"You already told me that last time."
I'd tensed for a moment over nothing, and the words made me feel a little foolish. Wait.
"...What you told them is the part that matters, isn't it?"
"...Th-they kept badgering me... Asking if we really just ate and went our separate ways. Calling me an idiot... Teasing me, so..."
"...How far did you go?"
"I... once I started talking..."
"So how far?"
"E-everything..."
"Everything?"
"...Yes."
"Even what happened at the theater?"
"...Yes."
I stroked the cheek of Hyunji, who was looking up at me like a puppy caught in the rain. She gazed quietly back, and just as she opened her mouth—
"Oppa... ack?"
I pinched both her cheeks and tugged them gently. They were firm enough that they barely stretched, but the feel of them in my hand carried a strange little pleasure.
"What were you thinking, telling them all of that?"
"I'm sowwy... Leggo..."
"If they ever actually see me, I'll be mortified."
"...S-stop..."
"Haa."
I let her cheeks go. I hadn't pulled hard, but they'd gone bright red all the same. I understood, really. She must have been dying to brag. I'd only wanted to give her a warning.
"But... i-if a baby comes... the only ones who'll help me are my friends."
"...Is that so?"
"O-of course. They don't know when it might happen to them either..."
What followed made it plain this wasn't merely an excuse. Thinking it over, she had a point. In a world where a father's role was as good as nonexistent, there were things a mother alone would struggle to manage. A people raised on village covenants and communal labor crews wasn't about to abandon one of their own. It might even be something like the old wedding bundle—studio portraits, the dress, and the makeup, all packaged together.
"...I suppose so. You'd have things to learn from each other."
"Th-that's right. Mom helps with some of it, but friends help an awful lot too. Real life is different... Once it gets hard to get around, and things like that..."
"...So just how detailed was this explanation?"
"...Ah. Hehe."
"Unbelievable."
"I-I didn't know we'd end up filing the report today..."
"All right. I understand. You were worried, weren't you?"
"...No. It's not that..."
I watched her stealing glances at me, then stroked her hair. Of course she'd been frightened. I'd heard what she said that morning, and I knew well enough that the thought of a child wasn't purely happy. She must have been afraid I might suddenly leave. When she couldn't reach me that day, I had all but made her feel that way myself.
"Don't worry anymore."
"...Okay. I won't. Not now."
"Good. Then, in that spirit."
I stopped. Hyunji, who had been smiling at me, tilted her head. I smiled and jerked my chin toward the shop right beside us.
"...Ah."
"Come on. Let's see what suits our Hyunji."
Stretching away to my right and to my left were lingerie shops.
"O-oppa."
"I'm not walking past this one."
"...Okay..."
Her face flushed as she let me lead her in, and the moment we stepped into the first shop, two or three women nearby went wide-eyed. They either casually hid the underwear they'd been looking at or fled as if they were escaping. I'd grown so used to being stared at lately that their embarrassment felt almost strange.
...This wasn't an ordinary place.
The designs on display from the entrance were serious business. This clearly wasn't somewhere you came to pick something for everyday wear. I'd disrupted their shopping without meaning to.
"How about this?"
A bra and panties in a bold cut. One careless choice and a set like this could look older than it should, but the design itself was quite good. The color was a provocative red. Hyunji's skin was so fair that it would only look sexier on her, and the moment she saw it, her face began to redden to match the fabric.
"...I-I'll try it on..."
"And this?"
This time it was a white bralette set, all innocent charm. Even if she said she didn't want it, I was determined to see her in it—it suited her that well. On a slim figure like hers, nothing worked better. And with no padding, it happened to be my taste as well.
"...That one too."
"Don't just answer. Lift your head and look properly. Is the gray beside it better? That one looks pretty too."
"...O-oppa... This is too embarrassing..."
"I'm the one who's going to see it anyway. Excuse me."
I called over an employee who had been hesitating as she watched us, and spoke the moment she hurried across.
"This one, and this one. The bra in a 70B, and the panties... A small might be a little small. Or maybe tight would look prettier."
"A-ah! Oppa! I'll tell her!"
"...Y-yes, one moment."
"H-how did you know my size?"
"After looking and touching that much, how would I not?"
"...Ah."
My whisper must have come out louder than I'd meant; I could feel the stir it sent through the women around us. The one disappointing part was that there were more people than I'd expected, which made it hard to tease her. Maybe I ought to charge straight through.
"I'd like to see what she looks like in them myself. That's probably not allowed, is it?"
"Ah, well..."
"A-ah, oppa! Mmph!"
When I drew the flustered Hyunji against my chest and covered her mouth, the employee's eyes went soft and unfocused as she looked at us.
"So it is difficult. I understand. I'll see later."
"...Oppa. This is too embarrassing..."
"Do you hate it?"
"...I-I don't hate it. If you like it, then I like it too..."
"We ought to be proud of it. We're not committing a crime, are we?"
"Th-that's true, but..."
"It's a shame I can't see for myself. Go on, try them."
"...Okay."
"You have to pick something for me too."
"Th-then... would you like to match it as a set with mine...?"
"I'd like that."
"...Okay."
While we whispered, the employee brought out Hyunji's size. Hyunji took the two sets off their hangers and headed for the fitting room with her face still red. I smiled at how cute she looked and glanced around the shop. Changing took time in a lingerie store, so there were quite a few fitting rooms, and they were well screened from the outside.
"Do you carry men's as well?"
"O-of course. This way..."
"I'll look around, so please pick something that goes with the set she just took in."
"Ah, understood."
I was a little embarrassed myself, but I did my best to act as if I weren't. I hadn't had many reasons to walk into a women's lingerie shop, and I had certainly never looked this openly before. The novelty sent me wandering here and there, and far from stopping me, the employee trailing behind watched me as if I were something remarkable.
"...Do things like this actually sell?"
"Customers with partners, or women who've set a date, buy them quite often—as their ace in the hole."
What had caught my eye was lingerie so revealing I couldn't tell whether it was underwear or simply a few strings. The red thong was sheer mesh all the way across the front, with lace laid over it like embroidery. Down below, the precious place had been cut so that it split open to either side. Anyone could guess what it was for. It would have suited Hyunji, but the faces that came to mind first were Rahi's and Ju Hayeong's.
...Should I buy one for Rahi?
I could picture exactly how she would blush, and then I quietly looked away. I would have to bring Rahi here sometime. Today I wanted to focus on Hyunji. A date in a lingerie shop. Better than I'd expected.
"Sir."
"Yes?"
The employee who had been following me glanced around, then lowered her voice.
"If you'd like to see for yourself, the way you mentioned earlier, shall I show you in? You're a couple, so there's no problem at all. It happens fairly often. We would never allow it for women, but for a man there's no real issue. Earlier your girlfriend was simply too embarrassed. And we don't have many customers today, so you're welcome to enjoy yourselves. At our store, limited to couples, in order to contribute to the birth rate... the fitting rooms are also quite generously sized..."
Her words poured out almost the way Lee Hyangsuk's did. What trailed off at the end was simply this brand's promotional copy. The point, anyway, was that I was allowed to go in.
"...It's really all right?"
I studied her, checking whether she meant it, but she only tilted her head as if my question were the strange part.
"Of course. Take your time admiring her, then come out whenever you like."
"...Then would you show me the way?"
"Yes. The customer who just went in is number one, correct?"
"Ah, yes. She's the only one."
"This way, then."
She led me to the fitting-room entrance and held the curtain aside, and I ducked my head and stepped through. Five fitting rooms of a simple design stood in a row. What surprised me was how noticeably spacious they were. I stopped in front of room three and cleared my throat through a moment of awkwardness, and only from room one did I sense anyone inside.
"...Oppa?"
"Yeah. I'm coming in."
"A-ah! Just a moment..."
From inside came the frantic rustle of fabric, then the sound of a deep breath, and at last the lock clicked open. Hyunji's head peeked out.
"A-are you really going to look...?"
"Yeah. They said it was all right."
"...I wanted to show you later."
"Is that really it? Not just because you're embarrassed?"
The moment I opened the door, I had to stop my hand. A bra trimmed in ornate purple lace. Panties cut at a daring angle that climbed all the way to her hips. Hyunji's snow-white skin, and the pretty arms and legs she drew in as if to hide herself there, made me swallow without meaning to.
"...It suits you better than I expected."
"R-really...? I'm glad... I've never worn a design like this before."
"Let's buy it."
"...Okay. C-could you close the door...?"
"Ah, right."
"Ah..."
I grinned at the sight of her blushing because the door was open, then stepped into the fitting room in a single motion. Just as the employee had said, it was wide enough to be comfortable even with two people inside. I settled my hips against a ledge and took in the figure of Hyunji, flushed and flustered as she looked at me, before leaning in to whisper.