How a Loan Shark Survives as an Actor — Episode 15
Today was my first real day acting the male lead's older brother, Kang Min-woo, in front of the camera.
Let's do this right.
After the script reading, I had been quietly rebuilding the character through constant back-and-forth with PD Jang. He walked me through the backstory that never made it onto the page — small, detailed pieces of Kang Min-woo's history that no viewer would ever see spelled out.
At first I'd wondered why I needed to know any of it. This stuff wouldn't appear in the drama anyway. But once I started building the performance on top of that foundation, I found I could pull out far finer shades of expression, and the takes genuinely came out better for it.
The backstory was also tightly tied to the question of why Kang Min-woo abused his younger brother in the first place. When PD Jang first asked if I wasn't curious about the reason, I'd shot the question right back — why would I need to be?
What reason could there possibly be?
A piece of trash does trash things, that's all. I couldn't see why anyone would need to understand what makes trash into trash — though in the end, knowing it did help the acting.
According to PD Jang, the male lead Kang Min-jun was connected to the accident that killed their parents, and that was where his crushing guilt came from. Even when his brother beat him, Min-jun endured it in silence because he believed he was the cause.
Not a word of this appeared in the script, but hearing it explained, the dynamic between the two brothers finally made sense.
Not that it changes what he is — still garbage.
PD Jang said they'd stripped all mention of it from the script on the grounds that unpacking the tragedy in detail simply didn't fit a romantic comedy. And honestly, Kang Min-woo had been a character rushed into existence because of me in the first place, so he never quite matched the tone of the show to begin with.
Just do it the way I rehearsed.
I took a deep breath and was about to step onto the set when I caught the cheerful hum of conversation already drifting out from inside.
Everyone's in good spirits, I guess.
Despite not having a single finished episode in the can, the drama's premiere date was bearing down on us. At the current pace, by the day episode one aired we'd have shot exactly three episodes' worth of material.
I'd wondered how anyone could schedule something so absurd, until the real reason reached my ears through the grapevine: the drama originally slotted for that timeslot had fallen through, and this show had been hastily crammed in as a stopgap.
'Wait, seriously — is this schedule even possible?'
'Well... we'll make it possible.'
Lee So-eun, the junior staff member who'd been all bright smiles at the script reading, had answered me with eyes completely drained of life.
Under circumstances like these, everyone was bound to be on edge. No — normally, that is exactly how it should have gone.
"Haha, so I'm telling him, and then in my dream last night—"
But inside the set, happy laughter rang out.
Loudest of all was PD Jang. He'd already sounded in high spirits on the phone yesterday — he'd told me that thanks to the shelter post, buzz around the drama had grown and the investment money had ballooned right along with it. I remember thinking I hadn't known a human voice could climb that high.
"Um, but... what if Seul-ho-ssi can't act?"
A staff member who hadn't noticed my arrival whispered it.
"The reading was pure luck. What if he's the same as before the second the camera rolls?"
I was weighing whether to pretend I hadn't heard when PD Jang's answer came back, rock solid.
"You think I've only seen the kid act at the reading? Everything he's done since — you haven't seen it? That's the stuff that's actually insane."
That was his way of saying: if you're that nervous, trust me. He brushed the worry aside without a second thought.
I counted a few seconds in my head, then walked onto the set.
"Hello."
"Our Seul-ho-ssi is here!"
PD Jang beamed and waved me in. Being greeted like a returning war hero was honestly a little embarrassing.
"Looking forward to working with you today."
"Aw, no, it's me who should be saying that. Don't be nervous. Let's get that same chemistry going with Jun-seo like we had at the reading."
But for all of PD Jang's pep, the Woo Jun-seo who showed up five minutes later glanced at me once and then breezed straight past.
What was that?
I wondered if I was imagining it — until we ran lines in front of the camera and I understood completely.
He isn't even looking at me.
Woo Jun-seo wasn't playing the gracious senior, and he wasn't picking fights either. He was simply treating me like I didn't exist. And that icy attitude was throwing off our dialogue rhythm badly.
"Haha, I'm already on edge just thinking about how brilliantly our Jun-seo actor is going to perform."
PD Jang forced a laugh and made a show of pumping him up.
I deliberated for a moment, then spoke up.
"Honestly, I think it's a real stroke of luck that Jun-seo-ssi is here. Even if my acting falls short, I have complete faith that he'll carry the scene."
"...?"
Only then did Woo Jun-seo turn to look at me, wearing the expression of a man confronted with something genuinely strange. But I didn't back down — I kept doling out lines like I look forward to learning so much from you today, layered on as thickly sincere as I could manage.
Somewhere in the middle of it, my eyes briefly met PD Jang's. He was thanking me with his.
Either way, Jun-seo has to cooperate if we're going to get a good scene.
If his unprofessional behavior tanked his reputation while mine climbed, sure, that'd be fun for the moment. But I needed this drama to shake off the Useless label. Which meant the show had to air on schedule, which meant today's shoot had to wrap on time and wrap well. Right now, my pride and my feelings came second to that.
"Fine. Suit yourself."
He clearly hadn't expected me to fold first. One of Woo Jun-seo's eyebrows shot up, and he let out a cold remark. Thankfully, from that point on his attitude softened and he was unmistakably more cooperative.
PD Jang let out a sigh just quiet enough to slip past Woo Jun-seo, gave my shoulder a light pat, and stepped out beyond the cameras.
"Ready — we're rolling in."
We took our positions in a corner of the alley.
The scene that would introduce Kang Min-woo to the drama was the 'Still not dead yet?' scene from the reading, but that one had been pushed to tomorrow afternoon thanks to a location permit issue. What I was shooting today was the scene where Kang Min-woo, having waited in the alley for his brother to finish his shift, shakes him down for his paycheck.
The area was ringed with abandoned buildings — nobody around except me, Woo Jun-seo, and the production crew.
"And... standby—"
I lifted my head slowly.
The camera's red light, and behind it all those people watching me. I took it all in.
...Let's go.
The moment I swallowed hard, a shout like rolling thunder erupted.
"Action!"
A dark night. A deserted alley.
Under a single streetlight flickering on its last legs, I stood there with an expression of pure, bottomless boredom.
"Ugh, when's he getting out."
Bored enough to start kicking at the streetlight, I heard the crunch of someone stepping on a twig. I turned my head — and there was Kang Min-jun, spotting me at the exact same moment.
"Little brother!"
I waved with a bright, sunny grin. With a face as exhausted as his footsteps, Kang Min-jun dragged himself over.
"Hyung, I told you it's a problem when you come all the way to my workplace—"
"Money."
"I already told you at home—"
"Money."
Min-jun let out a small sigh and pulled out his phone. Watching him start the bank transfer, I cooed at him in my sweetest aegyo-drenched voice, "Hand it over quick~"
The second this lands, I'm paying Mi-jin back her four hundred.
Getting to flex a little pride for once had me in a good mood. But the moment I saw the amount come through on my phone, my brows knitted on their own.
"What is this? Why's it so little? What'd you go and buy?"
"It's a new semester, hyung. I've got group projects and all, so I need money too."
"...Are you insane?"
Without a moment's hesitation, I slapped the back of his head, hard. As he clutched his skull with a yelp, I sneered down at him.
"Hey. Sending you to college took some real deciding on my part, you know. I never got to go — I'm stuck working in a factory. I sent you because you're my one and only little brother. Got it?"
"Ugh, fine — and that's why I'm busting my ass earning living expenses! I'm cutting into my study hours to work. I'm supposed to be gunning for a scholarship too, so if you could just cover the textbook money—"
"Then why the hell did you even go to college! A kid with no future anyway!"
I cracked him across the back of the head a second time. My little brother, hit twice in a row, clenched his fist tight — and an involuntary laugh snorted out of me.
"Oh? So now you're going to hit me back?"
At those words, his head jerked up like something in him had finally snapped.
And then, for the first time in ages, my eyes met my little brother's.
...!
His eyes were more worn down than I'd imagined. For an instant, I froze. Some strange emotion stirred in the faded memory of those young eyes, and I found the feeling deeply unsettling.
So I scrambled to find the next line I was supposed to say.
"What? Gonna try to kill me too?"
The words were barely out of his mouth before his expression shattered and reformed. The flicker of resentment that had been there vanished, and in its place guilt and emptiness burst up like a bubble breaking the surface — and I watched everything in him collapse in real time.
It was pitiful enough that watching it made me uncomfortable.
"...I'm sorry."
Long seconds later, my little brother apologized in a voice that was dying on the way out.
I had no idea what face to make, so I swallowed hard. Then I forced out the coldest voice I could muster.
"I'll let it slide this once. Next time, hand over the full amount."
And I turned my back on him immediately.
The instant my back was turned, my face crumpled.
Fuck. That little bastard... ugh, that felt awful.
"Cut!"
At the word, my mind snapped back to itself.
Kang Min-woo's thoughts drained away in an instant, and all that was left was me, catching up to myself a beat too late.
Shit.
I didn't even have the presence of mind to be annoyed that, once again, my acting had slipped out of my control. The only thought filling my head was that I'd blown it.
I just went and added dialogue on my own.
This was exactly the problem. I was supposed to hold on to some measure of my rational mind and deliver the lines as written — but every single take, I let go of the controls and the character took over. Hah. Real actors probably never had to worry about this.
"I'm so sorry!"
The instant I'd grasped the situation, I bowed low toward the production crew.
The scene had flowed exactly as scripted the whole way through — until I opened my mouth and said, "What? Gonna try to kill me too?" From that moment, everything changed. What should have been a scene revealing only Kang Min-woo's violent streak and Kang Min-jun's worn-down state had suddenly turned into a hint that there was some deeper history between the two brothers.
I told them, over and over — please don't do unscripted ad-libs without checking first.
My goal had never been to inflate my screen time right now. It was to earn solid marks from the crew I worked with, so that down the line they'd offer me a slightly more meaningful role. Even if my part ballooned today, I couldn't act it properly anyway — better to build my presence gradually on the strength of the production team's good opinion. Safe and steady.
I can't go ticking off the crew just to grab a few extra lines.
I fired apologies at PD Jang like a machine gun — it just came out, I swear I wasn't trying to ad-lib — and apologized to Woo Jun-seo too, for throwing him off. But both their faces were strange.
"Well then... let's take a look at what we just shot."
PD Jang checked the footage, and his expression grew even stranger. Same with Woo Jun-seo.
"Um... that came out really good."
"Right...? Hah — what do I do. Throw it away? I mean, that's the correct call... but how am I supposed to throw this away...?"
Woo Jun-seo replayed his own expressions — the ones he'd used to receive my ad-lib — over and over on the monitor. Despite my ambush of an unscripted line, he'd stayed fully in the scene and delivered better acting than the script had ever asked of him.
He clearly knew it too, because greed spread across his face as he said, "PD-nim, I want to keep this one."
"Ohh, don't think I don't want to. But if we go down this backstory route, it's going to clash with the tone of the show."
PD Jang sounded genuinely torn. That was when the assistant writer, silent until then, jumped in.
"But — Min-jun's a full-grown adult. The idea that he puts up with abuse purely because it's family? From the audience's perspective, that's going to feel hard to swallow. Some people will find it suffocating and call it a total goguma of a plotline."
"Ah... fair point?"
"Honestly, laying the backstory out properly might be better for plausibility. Just keep the tempo tight so it doesn't wreck the drama's tone, and then put the scene with the female lead right after Min-woo's scenes to sharpen the contrast."
"Hmm. Yeah. Let's do that. So we're expanding Min-woo's part, revising the script... which means—! I'm not going home again tonight!"
Hahaha — PD Jang laughed like a man losing his mind.
I just stared at him, dazed.
My screen time had just multiplied in a single heartbeat. Is this for real?