As Soft as Mama's Embrace
It was so comfortable. So cozy.
It didn't even hurt.
As she slept, Haennim-i's lips curled into a little smile. Hehe. It doesn't hurt. When was the last time she had slept like this? No pain, and her back so velvety-soft, so fluffy… It felt just like climbing onto Mama's belly to sleep. Hehe, Mama…
The happiest time in Haennim-i's whole life had been when she lived with Mama. Back then, Mama would wrap her up in a tight hug, and she would hug her great big Mama right back, so happy. Even sleeping had been soft and fluffy. Mamaaa…
Haennim-i rolled onto her side, trying to hug her Mama. Whenever she did this, Mama would always scoop her up tenderly in her front paws. But after Mama had gone on her journey to the Bear Star, Haennim-i could no longer feel that fluffy embrace.
Maybe it was because everything was so velvety and plush, but sleeping on the mat, Haennim-i felt as if she had gone back to those days of her childhood—back to when Mama used to hold her. That was why. Haennim-i nuzzled her face into the soft mat, being a baby.
Nnhhh, Mama, hold me…
But Mama's warm embrace never came.
It was only natural, of course—but to Haennim-i, lost in a happy dream, it was a strange thing. A strange feeling washed over her, and her eyes fluttered open. Then she called for Mama.
She opened her eyes calling for Mama, but the blurry shape in her vision was not Mama.
Blink. Blink. Blink.
Slowly, her vision returned… and the being that filled both of Haennim-i's eyes was—
"…Ba-Banana Oppa?"
"That's right. It's Banana Oppa. Did our Haennim-i sleep well?"
At the sound of Lee Jun's voice, Haennim-i began to remember what had happened before she fell asleep. It hurt so much. I was crying because it hurt… She had whimpered from the pain. Then, at some point, something soft and fluffy had wrapped around her. For a moment, she thought it was Mama. So she had called for Mama, but Mama didn't answer. So she called for Mama again as she opened her eyes, and then…
"Oppa called for me…"
Haennim-i had only mumbled it, so very quietly. But Lee Jun, who had been waiting for her to wake from the anesthesia, didn't miss a single sound of her voice. Hoping she wouldn't be confused as she came out of it, he answered right away.
"That's right. I called for you."
Only then did Haennim-i come fully to her senses, gazing at Lee Jun with bright, clear eyes. The first being besides Mama who had ever stroked her head. The cozy being who had held her front paw so tightly. And the one who had given her the most delicious food she had ever tasted in her life. The being she had missed so terribly, the one she had longed to see, was looking at her and smiling.
"Oppa! Banana Oppa!"
Haennim-i beamed, so happy and so glad to see him. Of course, she had talked with Lee Jun before falling asleep, and she had felt his touch. But she had been in so much pain that, honestly, not much of it had registered. The one thing she remembered was—
"Banana Oppa said if I go night-night, it won't hurt anymore…"
That, she remembered clearly. So she had fallen asleep…
Haennim-i blinked. No matter how she thought about it, nothing hurt. Her bottom had hurt so, so much—but now it didn't. It throbbed a little, and there was a prickling sting, but that crushing pain that had made it hard to breathe was gone.
"It… doesn't hurt!"
Haennim-i beamed and started to push herself up. But Lee Jun stopped her.
"Haennim-i, it'll hurt if you get up. Stay lying down for now."
"Okay!"
Haennim-i let out a happy koong! and went limp, settling right back down. Lying there, she spoke.
"Oppa said if I go night-night and wake up, it won't hurt. And you were right. It doesn't hurt. So I'm gonna listen to Oppa."
A crystal-clear answer, without a shred of doubt. Lee Jun smiled at the radiant little bear.
"That's right. If you listen to this Oppa, I'll make it hurt even less."
At Lee Jun's words, Haennim-i didn't even bother with a confident Really?—she just lifted her front paw and answered.
"Waaah! Hehehe."
Lee Jun reached out to the front paw she'd raised while lying down, and went on.
"Tomorrow, let's eat something delicious."
"Yay yay! Okay! But I don't wanna."
Lee Jun gave a bitter smile at Haennim-i's strange answer. He already knew why. And then the reason spilled from her mouth.
"I wanna eat something yummy. The fluffy, yummy banana Oppa gave me was sooo tasty, but now it doesn't taste good. So I'm hungry, Oppa."
Haennim-i's condition had deteriorated so badly that her appetite had plummeted; for the past few days, she had barely been able to drink water. Bananas—her absolute favorite—had been piled high in front of her food bowl, but she hadn't touched them. She would only dip a little honey, a delicacy among bears, and put it in her mouth. Unable to even receive IV fluids, Haennim-i had at least been spared from hypoglycemia thanks to that honey. When she scooped it up with her front paw and sucked it into her mouth, it was absorbed as she swallowed her saliva.
"I know. But if you go night-night for one more night and wake up, you'll be able to eat it all tasty. Just wait one night."
"Hehe, after one night it'll be yummy!"
Haennim-i beamed, delighted. She took every word Lee Jun said as gospel. Lee Jun spoke to the little bear who didn't know how to doubt.
"Haennim-i, I'll make sure you get better. I'll make it so nothing hurts at all."
"Okay! It won't hurt!"
Lee Jun slipped his hand through the bars of the cage and stroked Haennim-i as he spoke.
"Haennim-i, if you just stay lying still like that, you'll get better fast."
"Okay! Got it!"
It was a good thing they had positioned her right up against the bars, in case she tried to press herself against them. Just as Lee Jun had said, Haennim-i simply smiled and didn't move her body at all.
"But Oppa! This is all soft and squishy. Hehe, it feels good."
She was talking about the mat they'd laid on the floor.
"Haennim-i, it feels nice, right? It'd be nice to keep this down and live on it, wouldn't it?"
"Yeah! I like it! It's like lying with Mama!"
No matter how plush the mat was, it could never replace Mama's embrace. And yet, for Haennim-i, who had been sleeping on a grated floor of bars with her flesh poking through the gaps, a single springy mat was, in truth, extraordinarily soft.
And perhaps the other Somang-is had heard Haennim-i's voice, because the gazes of the Somang-is—the bears—all focused on Lee Jun.
They had taken the Somang-is in from the bear farm, but they still hadn't been able to prepare a proper home for them to live in. It couldn't be helped, but for now, a cramped cage of barely seventy square feet was their shelter. The foul-smelling surroundings had been cleaned, and they could now drink fresh water and eat delicious food. They were receiving health care, too. But a cozy nest of their own had not yet been granted to them.
They could lay mats on the floor. The process of laying them down wouldn't be easy, of course. But if those mats became soiled with waste, the result would be worse than not laying them at all. And so the Somang-is had still been living on floors riddled with holes.
"Haennim-i, if you just listen well to what this Oppa tells you, you'll be able to sleep on something fluffy from now on, too."
Haennim-i's dark eyes sparkled.
"I'll listen real good!"
"Good. It's very simple."
Lee Jun pointed to the spot where the mat wasn't laid down and told her to use that as her bathroom.
"Got it! Oppa!"
Following Haennim-i's answer came a chorus of kuong-kuong, kuwoor. The bears who had been watching Lee Jun all nodded their heads together. Lee Jun spoke to those bears as well.
"You guys wait too. If you do what I told Haennim-i, I'll lay down something fluffy for you."
The bears answered with another joyful kuwowor, and Lee Jun turned his attention back to Haennim-i.
"Good. Our Haennim-i is so smart. Then let me tell you how to make it not hurt. I'll need Haennim-i's help this time, too."
"Okay. Oppa!"
"Alright. We'll start this evening, so I'll tell you then. Until then, you have to keep this in, okay? Don't pull it out."
What Lee Jun pointed to was the IV line.
"Okay!"
Lee Jun called Kwak Suho and explained the situation.
After hanging up with Kwak Suho, Lee Jun looked after the other bears until it was time to treat Haennim-i. Looking after them wasn't anything special. Health checkups. Conditions that Kang Han-ul's team had normally only been able to assess by eye. But Lee Jun could ask the bears themselves how they were feeling.
When Kang Han-ul saw the health checkup chart Lee Jun had made, he nearly had a heart attack.
"Wh-what is all this?"
"I just picked out the things the kids seemed uncomfortable with."
Lee Jun answered as if it were nothing, but Kang Han-ul's eyes were still wide enough to fall out of his head.
"I think it would be good if we checked them over and treated whatever we can."
"Yeah. We should."
At Lee Jun's follow-up, Kang Han-ul snapped back to his senses and clenched his fist. Seeing that, Lee Jun let out a small laugh and turned to Go Gi-jin.
"Gi-jin, let's go to Haennim-i."
"Yes, let's go, Hyungnim."
Go Gi-jin picked up a box and followed. Inside the box were disinfectant, gauze, cotton, cotton bandages, tape, white sugar, and more. Kang Han-ul followed the two of them, saying,
"Hey, aren't you guys scared? I know Haennim-i's on the small side, but she's still a bear. A bear."
Lee Jun and Go Gi-jin answered at the same time to Kang Han-ul, who was shaking his head with worry.
"We'll be careful."
"Them kids listen real well to Hyungnim, so it oughta be just fine."
"That's dogs and cats! These are bears, I'm telling you, bears!"
"If she gets agitated, I'll put her under right away."
That wasn't going to happen, but Lee Jun said it to ease Kang Han-ul's worries.
Soon, the three of them witnessed a bizarre sight. Haennim-i was lying down, twisting and writhing her body.
"Is—is Haennim-i having a seizure?"
"Why's Haennim-i doin' that?"
The three of them picked up their pace. The other two ran because they thought Haennim-i was seizing from pain, while Lee Jun ran for a different reason. As he ran, Lee Jun called out,
"Haennim-i, you can get up now. Get up and go pee."
In that instant, Go Gi-jin and Kang Han-ul, still running, turned to look at Lee Jun with strange expressions. The look on their faces said, What kind of nonsense are you spouting?
But inside the cage, something even more bizarre happened. Haennim-i groggily got up and shuffled a few steps in an awkward crouch. Then she went to the spot without a mat, squatted down—and did her business.
They froze. The two who had been running stopped dead in their tracks and blinked at the scene before them.
"Wh-what did I just see?"
"Sure looks like Haennim-i just did what Hyungnim said."
"B-bears can be trained? Well, bears can be trained—no, that's not the point, bears can be trained, they're smart. But in just a few hours…?"
Kang Han-ul's gaze, which had been on Haennim-i, had already shifted to Lee Jun. Lee Jun was already standing in front of the cage.
"Haennim-i, if you need to pee, just go pee. Why were you holding it in?"
"Oppa told me to stay lying down!"
Haennim-i beamed at Lee Jun, bright as sunshine. It was as if she were saying, I did good, right?
Lee Jun was inwardly stunned. I did tell her she'd get better if she stayed lying down, but I didn't think she'd listen this well. He was grateful she'd at least gotten up and gone off the mat now. If she hadn't, Haennim-i would have been in real distress. Or she might have held it until she peed right where she was, then felt sorry for breaking her promise. I need to be more careful from now on. With Haennim-i, and with the other animals too. So that these good, gentle creatures who took every word at face value wouldn't end up in a bind.
Having collected himself, Lee Jun praised her.
"Haennim-i listens to Oppa so well."
"Yeah! Oppa."
"What a good girl. Our Haennim-i."
Haennim-i grinned bashfully at Lee Jun's praise. He went on.
"Haennim-i, then this Oppa is going to go in there and blow on it—hooo—to make our Haennim-i all better."
"Okay! Hehehe."
Watching Lee Jun talk to Haennim-i, Kang Han-ul turned to Go Gi-jin and said, as if lamenting,
"That Lee Jun, he's the same as ever. The same. Gi-jin, does he do that when he's seeing patients at Meongmeong, too? Explaining everything one by one to the dogs and cats like he's talking to a patient?"
"That's right. That's why our clients all figure Hynim actually talks to the animals, y'know."
While the two of them were talking, Lee Jun was already opening the cage door.
"W-w-wait, you shouldn't go in—"
Before Kang Han-ul could even finish, Lee Jun had stepped inside the cage, and Go Gi-jin, seeing that, chased in after him.
"Hyungnim, wait up."
Go Gi-jin hurried into the cage, and—
Clank!
The door shut.
"Th-those…"
Standing in front of the closed cage, Kang Han-ul prayed for the safety of his precious juniors.
"Let's start with the dressing."
"Got it."
Lee Jun and Go Gi-jin worked in perfect sync, finishing the disinfection in no time. Then Lee Jun sprinkled a thick layer of sugar over the wound. He laid gauze over it and spread cotton wide. Then he carefully secured it with silk tape, and over that, he applied a wide strip of medical non-woven tape. Through it all, Haennim-i just kept smiling hehe, staying perfectly still.
Watching this, Kang Han-ul shook his head.
"I can't tell if I'm watching someone treat a Newfoundland or a bear."
Newfoundlands are giant working dogs, a breed with predominantly black and brown coats.
"Aigoo, now that you put it that way, Senior, they really do look alike. Even the weight's about the same."
Haennim-i weighed around a hundred and forty pounds. Go Gi-jin added,
"Eat plenty and get nice and chubby, y'hear!"
"That's right. Haennim-i, tomorrow let's eat lots of delicious things! And you can't touch this until tomorrow morning!"
Kkueng-kkueng!
Haennim-i answered with a bright smile. As she answered, she spread her front legs wide. Lee Jun wrapped her in a tight hug. Then Haennim-i nuzzled her head against Lee Jun's chest, making little kkueng-kkueng sounds.
The weather was already a blazing hot summer's day. But the "warm" Haennim-i spoke of had nothing to do with the weather. It was the warmth she hadn't felt since Mama had gone to the Bear Star.
Held in Lee Jun's arms, Haennim-i's expression was utterly at peace.