Restraint Play
"Hoo, you're terrified of my mighty rod. For the sake of the world, I must seal it away..."
"Impressive footwork. I learned more than one or two things just from watching."
S-man, who'd even settled the bill for the wrecked interior with the shop owner, got his magic cross back and examined it from every angle. Thanks to the proper infusion of lightning energy, blue sparks crackled and popped endlessly. It looked just like a weapon fresh from max reinforcement and enchantment in an RPG.
"They said to use foot techniques, you first have to open your energy meridians and learn to circulate your qi. Thanks to you, boss, I think I'll master it quick."
"If it doesn't stand after a flick, don't try shocking it upright. It's got more power than it looks."
"......"
"I believe it won't disappoint."
That old myth from porn flicks—zapping a dead dick with electricity makes it rise again. In reality, sure, you might get a temporary twitch, but it fucks up the sensitive nerves and tiny blood vessels bad enough to leave you impotent for life. Let's all aim for healthy sex lives, folks.
"Anyway, what's the plan now? With this many tails on us, they clearly know all about us. Won't Yonghwa Seonnyeo or Choi Jiyun be in danger?"
"Nah, they're safer than us."
"Ah."
The Mad Woman aside, against burly thugs, Haksik was a hard counter. She could mindfuck them without lifting a finger.
We grabbed the sprawled rice-cake dicks one by one and tossed them out to the street for the shop owner. These guys had clearly eaten their share of knife rice, lunging at us desperately—which was convenient, since it meant no holding back.
S-man fiddled with the burner phones he'd collected from them, soon uncovering a hidden messenger app and showing it to me.
"What's this?"
"One of those ghost messenger apps that got popular with smartphones. Similar to the MysticGallery app the boss lady uses, but mostly crooks who don't want official call logs use it."
"Don't Interpol or the FBI just sting and wipe these out?"
"That's why they run multiple servers and admins. If one admin gets nabbed or a server's data leaks, they cut the connection to dodge tracking. Crooks using their heads for once."
It had that random chat app vibe, all anonymous, rooms capped at about 20-30 people. Rooms could swap anytime, logs auto-deleted. No wonder they spewed unfiltered bullshit like rags in their mouths.
I love unfiltered chat too. I culled my smartphone's top 50 hentai classics and uploaded them to the crook's burner, then toured every room with a hentai bomb show.
"Guys who get off on blood and guts can't handle this shit. Hypocrites, every last one."
Anyway, might be fun to keep, so I pocketed the burner. Just then, cop cars wailed in from afar. The officers glanced at the thugs splayed like dried fish in the road, then turned puzzled eyes to us.
"Got a call. What the hell happened here?"
"Those guys at that Rose Tteokbokki joint suddenly started beating the shit out of each other. See the wrecked shop? Axes, sashimi knives—they came prepared."
"Jeez... And you two?"
"Just good Samaritans passing by. Right, boss?!"
I yelled to the shop owner, who nodded. He added that the CCTV was busted—no footage—but yeah, the crooks trashed the place, laying on the pitiful act thick. Money talks first, as always.
"We'll handle the scene. But you two need to come to the station for statements..."
"We're busy."
"Procedure for cases like this. Gotta accompany us voluntarily."
One cop subtly drew a taser from behind. Quiet street, no traffic, shop CCTV "broken." To haul all these gangsters, you'd expect three or four cars, but just one showed. I eyed the other cop arms-crossed on the far side. Sin fragments confirmed: both accomplices.
"H Group must've thrown around some serious cash."
That instant, the taser fired—but I shrugged off my coat, blocking the prongs with the hem. No real need, but I'd seen wuxia flicks; had to try it once.
"Don't move!"
Taser fail. The other drew his pistol—blanks removed, chamber hot. First shot live. H Group's bribes bought disposable badges.
"Magic Arrow!"
S-man whipped out his magic cross and foot-fired at the gunman. Pfbt.
"......"
"......"
A measly 3cm magic arrow fizzled midair, popping like a bubble. Stronger than a BB, maybe.
"If your S-pen's small, make your mind huge, you fuck! Or are you so defeatist you think you're small-fry?! Dream big! Imagine big! Mindset big!!"
"MAGIC ARROOOOOOOWWWW!"
PFWOOM! This time, a solid 5cm magic arrow blasted from the cross, nailing the slack-jawed cop square in the forehead. Impact like a thrown pebble. Nose gushing, he crumpled.
Meanwhile, I folded my coat, lunged, and drove a honest straight punch into the corrupt cop's solar plexus. Aaah, the physical arrow.
Cops selling out for pocket change. End times ain't far. Feeling it deep, I hopped in the cop car.
S-man's truck was burned; tails would keep coming. Cop car? No tails, no hassle. GTA auto-warrants stolen cop cars—reality's couldn't cuff this Daeri. Only Mom's womb could restrain me.
"Driven a cop car?"
"First time."
"Firsts are the best. Gets the blood pumping. I get unicorns now."
I asked the owner to call more cops, then lounged in the passenger seat. S-man linked his phone, blasting gangster hip-hop. Cop car speeding to gangster beats? Pure romance.
"Few hours till evening. What's next?"
"Play Lethal Weapon. Their hideout's nearby—time for a legal smash."
Cop trunks pack riot gear. Hip-hop over sirens, we hit the urban red-light district. Daytime cop car spooked the pimps prepping afternoon trade—they slunk indoors. Cops usually raid nights/dawns; daytime meant trouble. And they were right.
We scanned the sleazier-than-Seoul strip, grabbed vests, gloves, batons from the trunk.
"Won't all this noise blow our cover?"
"Better that way. Prey hitting the predator's den? Turns out it's cops? Muddle the intel. They'll tangle, infight, cut shares, go lone wolf. Big bounty on us, no trust left."
"Tracking us grinds to a halt."
"Yeah. Crooks got no loyalty. Use it."
Before storming a shady pleasure joint that screamed "sucked serfs dry," we picked roles.
"I'll be good cop."
"Then bad cop's mine."