Chapter 129: Men's Dreams: The Thrill of Hypnosis
Men's dreams—what are they? Mastering the three sword styles? Jerking off five times a day? Devouring both pizza and chicken solo? Nah. Men's true dream is hypnosis.
The fun of using a common-sense-altering app to turn a lazy student diligent. The thrill of turning a rude old lady or geezer causing a scene in a store into polite, sweet middle-aged folks with a single word. Holding a press conference, declaring yourself Iron Man, and making the entire world believe it. Hypnosis has that kind of addictive charm.
"Alright, Choi Yeon-jun. Look into my eyes."
"...Yes."
And right now, before my eyes, a real-life compressed hypnosis session was unfolding.
"You won't tell anyone about what you've experienced from two days ago until today. Not anyone else—just for me, you'll keep this secret. How does that make you feel?"
"Incredibly... happy and honored... I think."
"Then you'll keep the secret no matter what, right?"
"Yes."
"How will you keep it?"
"I'll play dumb."
"But what if they keep digging?"
"I'll stonewall them."
"What if they threaten you?"
"I won't open my mouth."
"What if they torture you?"
"I'll bite my own tongue."
"Good. Now there's a secret between us that you have to protect."
"Ahh......!"
Among the occult club members, Choi Yeon-jun—the one who at least seemed the most seasoned—fell first as hypnosis's sacrificial lamb. His pupils fully dilated, voice limp, expression one of utter rapture. He'd thrown himself into the spiderweb that Jiyun had spun, wrapped himself up tight like he was begging to be served on a platter, and even impaled himself on her fangs for good measure.
Ultimate devotion! The very essence of an idol worshipped and adored by all!
"Can you feel it, boss?"
"...Feel what?"
"That's 'aura.' If you're a pure human, boss, then Jiyun's a pure high school girl. Nothing like us adults can compare."
"What bullshit!"
"But even as you say that, aren't your hands shaking, boss?"
"!"
It was true. My hands were trembling like I had some neurological disorder. And they didn't even have a vibrator function!
"Her power is immense. I felt it firsthand as her guinea pig—it's not just simple brainwashing, suggestion, or hypnosis. We call it 'hypnosis' for convenience since there's no better term, but it's something far greater."
I swallowed hard without realizing it.
"First off, there's zero sense of disconnection or alienation. Brainwashing, suggestions, hypnosis—they all inherently create distortions or gaps when forcing the unnatural to feel natural. But hers is seamless. No excess baggage—one word sinks in like it's the most obvious common sense. For example, if you hypnotize someone with 'You're a dog from now on,' most just bark or whimper like a normal dog. But if Jiyun says it, know what happens?"
"Spit it out already, fuck."
"Shockingly, they take a shit and piss on a telephone pole. Like a real dog."
Inhuman hypnosis! I couldn't hide my horror. Did that wicked minor have no concept of human rights?!
"She makes anything humans can imagine possible—using human power, through humans."
"...And how the hell do you know that?"
"How do you think I know?"
S-man's expression told me to drop it. He probably never wanted to look at a telephone pole again.
"Even creepier is that memories stay intact. They remember every fact of being hypnotized, yet can't resist it—and naturally think they shouldn't resist. That's why there's no disconnection or alienation."
"Fucking terrifying."
"But there's a serious flaw."
"...A flaw? Seriously?"
"Yeah, shockingly fatal. First, it doesn't work on women."
"Ah."
That's when I noticed Park Seol-ha and Lee Ji-ah blinking in confusion. Jiyun hadn't even tried hypnotizing them from the start.
"Second, it deeply affects the target's constitution. It's such thick yin energy that men low on yang qi experience short durations or even death. I avoided that thanks to Yonghwa Seonnyeo's backup."
"Not omnipotent, then."
Jiyun's childhood had unconsciously idolized her, drawing endless unconditional love from those around her. But refining and honing that power for conscious use birthed this half-baked hypnosis with its limitations.
Having easily conquered Choi Yeon-jun and Lee Chan-young, Jiyun returned to my side beaming. Meanwhile, Yonghwa Seonnyeo had the two girls swear a separate pact. In the spirit world, such oaths were binding contracts—breaking them demanded a heavy price. Park Seol-ha knew from experience, and Lee Ji-ah from plain common sense.
In the end, the entire occult club vowed to take this to their graves, got their exorcisms, and headed home.
"How was I? Pretty amazing, right?"
"Yeah. Half-baked hypnosis, but impressive."
"Then praise me! Come on, praise me now!"
"Why should I?"
"...Because I did something praiseworthy?"
"But you're not my employee."
Right. Want the boss's praise? Become the boss's underling. With that in mind, I commended Yonghwa Seonnyeo and S-man.
"My employees, as expected. Worth feeding you expensive meals!"
S-man smiled shyly like it was too much, while Yonghwa Seonnyeo clicked her tongue.
"Hey, I did great too! I helped you out, mister! Shouldn't you praise me fairly?!"
"Nah."
I jabbed Jiyun's forehead with my finger, pushing her whining face away.
"Listen up. This is adult society. Adults use kids up and toss 'em when they're done. No mercy."
Just like my relatives.
"Praise doesn't cost money anyway."
"How do you know what my praise costs?"
S-man promptly slipped a white envelope into my hand, like he'd been waiting.
"This month's praise fee."
"See?"
"No way!!!"
"No means no!"
I drew a hard line. Once you praise her once, she'd expect it forever. Plus, it grated that she had a power I didn't.
Immature? I'm Han Daeri material, not some model adult.
"You really won't praise me?"
"Nope."
"For real?"
"Yep."
"For real real?"
"Yeah yeah."
"A high school girl like me is begging—can't you just be a proper adult and do it once?"
I snorted.
"Would praise you hypnotize out of me even be genuine?"
"......"
"You feel it too, right? That's it. In this society, all you can easily get is fair pay for honest work. Acclaim, honor, popularity? Totally different ballgame."
True praise wells up from the heart's depths.
"Like this white envelope. The moment you get it, genuine feeling surges from deep inside!"
"That's just being materialistic."
"Humans are materialistic! They live like pigs, then shamelessly find Jesus on their deathbed for heaven."
Jiyun pondered my words briefly, then declared triumphantly.
"Then I'll just make sincere praise well up from your heart!"
"White envelopes are his copyright—don't plagiarize."
"I don't use outdated crap like that! I'll use my own bo—ack!"
I smacked Jiyun's head hard. She thinks I'll go easy 'cause she's a high schooler? Fat chance.
"I'll help too."
"You take the back of her head, I'll handle the forehead!"
"Ow! Ow!"
The spectacle of two grown adults pummeling a high school girl from both sides was brief. We extracted her surrender, then high-fived in victory.
""Yee haw~!""
"You're not kids...!"
"You're the actual kid acting all un-kidlike! What? Use your body? If you can't control your overflowing youthful vigor, go labor on a site!"
"Choi Jiyun logs off due to cancer-inducing antics. You get off too, Choi Jiyun."
"Fuck!!"
Ahh, this is adult society. A subtle world no ink-fresh kid could grasp!
I couldn't wield ultimate hypnosis, but teasing one brat satisfied me. More fun than hypnosis anyway.
"What're you laughing about? The kids are gone—your turn."
If only there weren't always mood-killers like her, society might be better.
I sat before Yonghwa Seonnyeo with a bitter look.
"You know your sins."
"Who in this world is sinless? Everyone carries a sin or two, repents, finds Jesus, and heads to heaven."
"Your greatest sin is twisting the world's karma and fate with that blasphemous, arrogant ideology."
She slammed her steel fan down and—rare for her—glared at me with narrowed eyes.
"I barely stopped Seoul's sky from flipping once, but what you did this time? Even I couldn't fix it. Every spirit across the peninsula gathered couldn't. The Dragon Kings of the West, South, and East Seas are desperately suppressing the yin energy to keep the sea from becoming a 'passage.' Baekdu Mountain's sacred Dragon God gazes down, seeking you—the root of all evil."
"Should I be flattered?"
"From my view."
She tossed me a newspaper.
"Today's morning edition. Read it."
The front page featured a massive photo of me battling evil ghosts. Thanks to you, the world's in an uproar—now it's not just 'humans' hunting you. I'll help per our contract, but separately, even if you're at death's door, I won't save you. No such clause, and above all, even if it breaks the contract, your death would benefit the world more.
Big deal. I shoved the worthless rag aside.
"As long as I don't quit, no problem."
You're not embracing me. As boss, I embrace you to the end.