Pasta Panic and a Beefy Bombshell
As I lowered my hand, I caught sight of Yeongji Writer in my peripheral vision. She looked like she had something to say, but I had no time to worry about that right now. Because right in front of me was a mission that wasn't quite a mission.
'At least 10 servings...' If I wanted to feed the staff too, that was the bare minimum. Sure, 10 servings sounded simple, but cooking that much outdoors—away from a home kitchen—was backbreaking labor.
I filled a large pot to the brim with water and set it on the fire. I added a generous handful of salt for the pasta water to season it... and then garlic. I dumped an entire bag of peeled garlic from the mart onto the cutting board.
'...Should I get O Seokgyun to do this?' Sigh, no. Since I'd started, I might as well do as much as I could alone. A sigh escaped me, but my hands were already moving. I crushed half with the flat of the knife and chopped it, slicing the other half into thin pieces. Thwack, thwack, thwack! The rhythmic chopping echoed across the uninhabited island.
Then the problem hit.
"Ugh..." My eyes were burning. The garlic fumes stung my nose and eyes. It seemed to get worse as time went on. Damn, why wasn't there even a breeze when I needed it? My hands were slick with garlic juice, so I couldn't wipe my eyes.
'Ow, it stings...' I squeezed my eyes shut and tilted my head back to stare at the sky.
'Ah... that's better.'
That was when it happened.
"Ooh...! That's it! Perfect!" Ha Bong-seok PD's exclamation came from behind the camera.
"This is total thumbnail gold!"
Shit, that crazy broadcast nut. The guy's tearing up, and he loves it. He had a god-given talent for turning human suffering into content. No doubt a speck of human emotion wasn't left in him.
"Hoo..." Just ignore him. Reacting would only tire me out. I finally calmed my tears and grabbed the knife again.
As soon as the garlic was prepped, I dove into cooking. Perfect timing—the pot was boiling furiously.
'Hmm. This is 1kg, so about 10 servings.' I tore open the 1kg pasta bag and dumped it in. Whoosh— So much that it spilled over the edges.
"Seokgyun oppa."
I called O Seokgyun over.
"Yeah, what?"
"You have to keep stirring this so the pasta doesn't stick. It's a pain to scrub if it burns on the bottom."
"Got it! Leave it to me!"
O Seokgyun grabbed the tongs and glared at the pot like it was an enemy. It wasn't a fight, dude. While he battled the pasta, I prepped the sides. Corn and sausages. Classic BBQ camping staples that were hard to mess up.
I peeled the corn husks and skewered them. Then I slathered on a sauce I'd mixed—butter, sugar, and salt. But that wasn't all. Areum's camping secret: a sprinkle of black pepper.
'That's the difference between sprinkling and not.' The peppery kick after the sweet-salty flavor elevated the corn's taste.
For the sausages, I just scored them and skewered. Grill 'em, and they're delicious anyway.
I laid the skewers on the grill. I pulled a few burning charcoals from the bonfire and placed them underneath. Lid on, and time to focus on the main dish.
I set the griddles on the fire pit. I poured olive oil onto the hot surface.
Sploooosh. Nearly a whole bottle. As the oil bubbled and hissed, I dumped in all the garlic I'd teared up over.
Sizzle—! An explosive sound, and the nutty garlic aroma filled the air.
"Whoa... that smells insane."
O Seokgyun paused his stirring to sniff. I could hear the staff swallowing hard.
Once the garlic was golden, I pulled out my secret weapon. Chicken stock. A little of this turns plain water into magic.
"Oppa, pasta done? Move it over here."
"Okay!"
O Seokgyun brought the pot. I transferred the boiled pasta onto the griddle. A massive amount—nearly filling it up.
Now the real work began. Pour in the pasta water to emulsify while mixing the pasta and oil sauce.
Tongs in one hand, spatula in the other, I tossed it all.
"Hup...!"
It was heavy. Ten servings weighed a ton more than expected.
'Damn, my arms are gonna fall off.' Should I ask O Seokgyun? But the timing felt off. Almost done—if he finished and yelled "Done!", it'd feel weird.
I gritted my teeth and shook the griddles. I tossed the pasta into the air like wok hei to infuse smoky flavor.
Whoosh! Oil splattered, flames leaped up.
"Ooooh!"
The staff cheered.
...Truth be told, I hadn't planned on the flame show. The griddle was just too heavy, and it caught fire by accident. Unintentional showmanship.
Final step: peperoncino. The key to cutting the richness.
'...How much, though?' First time for 10 servings—I had no feel for it. Eh. Time for the kill shot.
I tilted the bag and shook in a rough handful. Plop plop plop— Red chilies rained down.
'Eh, close enough.'
"...Areum?"
O Seokgyun, watching from the side, sounded worried.
"Isn't that... too much? Won't it be spicy?"
Yeah, it did look like a lot. But spilled milk—or chilies.
"Nah, this'll be fine."
I have no idea. I mixed it once more with feigned calm. Spicy aroma bloomed.
"Alright! Done! Grab your plates!"
Staff swarmed at my shout.
"Looks so good!"
"The smell is unreal!"
Exclamations everywhere. I portioned pasta onto their plates. One, two... after nearly ten people, I was wiped.
'Haa... exhausting.' I stretched and looked around. They sat in a huddle on the ground, devouring it.
"So good!" they repeated. Pride swelled in me.
But...
'Huh?' One person missing?
I turned and saw Yeongji Writer off in the corner, alone, staring blankly at the sea. Empty-handed.
'Why isn't she eating?' I approached, concerned.
"Writer-nim? Not eating?"
"Oh, Areum-ssi... I'm fine."
"Huh? Everyone's loving it... Do you hate pasta?"
Yeongji Writer scratched her head awkwardly.
"No, it's... I actually have a durum wheat allergy... Hehe."
"...What?"
Durum wheat allergy? First I'd heard of it. I knew pasta was made from durum semolina, but an allergy to that?
...
"Whaaat..."
So no lasagna or couscous either? Missing out on this deliciousness? Heartbreaking.
"What about regular flour? Can you eat ramen?"
"No, flour's fine. Weirdly, just durum wheat."
Wow. The world of food allergies was deep. Ramen yes, pasta no.
What to do? Make her something separate? Maybe heat up some rice? As I pondered,
O Seokgyun approached from the side, hands full.
"Here! Dessert delivery!"
Grilled sausages and corn skewers. Yeongji Writer's eyes lit up. She gulped and lunged.
"Gimme...! Please giiiive!"
"H-Here you go!"
She snatched the sausage, beaming like she'd won the world, and took a huge bite.
"Mmm~! Delicious!"
Seeing that, I felt a pang of pity mixed with relief.
'...Yeah. Eat up.' Poor thing. Lunch was so skimpy. No way. Tonight, real tasty stuff.
Lunch wrapped up before long. Not stuffed, but everyone seemed satisfied. The production crew kindly handled the dishes, giving me a breather.
I plopped into a chair and gazed at the sea.
'Haa... tough.' Felt less like a camping guide, more like a maid. My whole body ached after 10 servings.
Then I spotted Ha Bong-seok PD gnawing corn like a squirrel. Hands gripping it tight, cheeks puffed as he chomped away.
'...That guy.' Reasonable suspicion hit. Did he change the plan just to mooch tasty food? Uninhabited island survival? Bull. He saw me cook and thought, 'I want her meals,' and pulled a fast one.
Almost went over for a bite. He made it look that good.
Break over—dinner prep next. Finish setup before sunset.
As I stood, O Seokgyun approached.
"Areum, rested?"
"Yeah. You rest too, oppa."
"Nah, I barely did anything. So, dinner menu?"
His eyes sparkled expectantly, flicking to the cooler.
"Looked like meat. I can grill."
"Great. BBQ party then—simple."
He puffed his chest confidently.
"Oh yeah? I grill meat like art. Leave it to me."
"For real? Perfect."
Oho... is that so?
"Two million won's worth."
"Yeah, two million's no sweat... What?"
O Seokgyun's words cut off. Eyes wide, staring at me.
"What'd you... say?"
"Two million won of beef."
"......"
His face went dumb. Mouth agape.
Heh. Shocked? I'd anticipated this. Even better in person.
But true. Dinner: two million won of beef, charged to Ha Bong-seok PD's corporate card. Sirloin, ribeye, short rib, tenderloin... prime Hanwoo cuts, piled high. The butcher asked if it was a company party. I saw PD's hand tremble at checkout.
Corporate card or not, two mil was steep. But... not my money. If we're eating, might as well go top-shelf, right?