Chapter 69
Chapter 69
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Translator: Ebonarch
Chapter: 69
Chapter Title: Even If I Fall Into a Ghost Story, I Have to Go to Work
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Who could have ever imagined having to do something like this?
Being trapped in a sealed space with three ghosts imitating humans, sitting still while breaking out in cold sweat.
Even...
Having to pretend to be calm as if you hadn't noticed a thing.
'...Can't let it show.'
Even if everyone except me was clapping their hands on the backs of their hands with bright smiles on their faces right in front of my eyes.
No, not people...
Ghosts.
Clap clap clap clap clap clap
'Can't... let it... show.'
And then one of them turns to me and asks:
"Why aren't you clapping?"
"......"
Holy shit.
I barely managed to raise my hand without trembling.
And...
Clap clap clap.
I politely placed one hand on top of the other on one arm, making a small sound.
The newbie glanced around as if checking the mood and gave an awkward smile.
"...I tried to clap but missed the timing and got flustered. It's a bit embarrassing."
"......"
Please.
Please just let it slide.
"Aw~ That's fine!"
"Hey, Leopard senior, that's pressure too. Don't make a bad impression on the competent newbie and sit down."
"Aigoo, yep."
The Leopard employee... or rather, whatever was impersonating that employee, shrugged as instructed and sat down.
'Phew...'
But the relief was short-lived.
Thud thud thud thud thud thud.
The Dolphin employee suddenly slammed her head into the floor.
And started rolling sideways.
Without a single change in expression.
"Th-there's a bug or something, a bug, but I can't catch it, bug..."
Thud thud thud thud thud thud.
"...They say nothing else can enter this darkness, right? Maybe you saw wrong?"
"Ah."
The Dolphin employee stopped banging her head.
Her long hair was disheveled, and her skull was caved in.
"You're right. Thanks, Deer assistant manager."
"No problem."
And then she casually resumed her conversation with the Leopard deputy next to her as if nothing happened.
"......"
Could I faint...? Would I go missing?
This is driving me insane.
'How the hell did everyone but me get swapped out...!'
It would have been so much better if I'd passed out and gotten swapped too, waking up tomorrow morning.
"Deer, eat up."
"Ah. Thank you so much, manager..."
In the midst of it all, the ghost wearing Lizard manager Lee Jaheon's face... no, don't think like that. Manager Lee Jaheon offered me a snack.
Kimbap from that pretty good snack bar near the office.
'I have to last almost 24 hours here until tomorrow morning, so I need to eat.'
Reasonable judgment. If only it didn't feel like I'd choke or puke it right back up the moment I put anything in my mouth...
'Ugh.'
"How about we share? We brought some stuff too."
The two from C Squad pulled out sandwiches.
I responded with reflexive social skills.
"I should have brought some, but things were hectic, so I'm just receiving. I'm really sorry and grateful."
"Aw, newbie, forget about seniority and all that. Even the manager doesn't seem to care much, right?"
"Yes."
The Leopard deputy stuck out her thumb and grinned at Lizard's curt reply.
"Wow~ Nice. Our squad leader's the same. Deer, you know that teal-winged duck squad leader from A Squad, right? He's on a whole different level—in a good way."
Oh crap.
"...Must be someone impressive enough for you two to admire."
"Kinda, right? He won a Wish Grant and took vacation... Aw, but I hope he doesn't quit."
I smoothly steered the conversation to praise, avoiding reaction to the A Squad leader trash talk.
They're ghosts anyway, no need for this... No, this is what I'm doing.
'Forget it, forget it...'
This feels less like a ghost story and more like chatting with higher-ups from a related department at a company workshop...
Of course, it didn't last long.
Right after eating, the Leopard deputy yawned and stood up.
"Ah, gotta stay here all day... Mind if I take off my shoes?"
"Ehh, you should have brought slippers like me."
"Aw, what can you do if I didn't? My socks are clean."
The Leopard deputy chatted lightly with the Dolphin junior as she started to remove her shoes.
'Yeah, even if she suddenly climbs on the table and tap-dances, don't be surpri—'
Hands instead of feet.
The hands that had been crammed and crouched inside the shoes popped out and stuck to the floor.
"......"
"Ah, while I'm up, I'll grab more coffee~ Everyone wants some, right?"
Whoosh.
The Leopard deputy did a handstand.
The hands on her feet waved up there.
Pat... pat.
An upside-down office worker walking.
"Deer assistant manager."
I swallowed a scream.
"Yes, Leopard deputy."
"Could you help me carry the coffee? For some reason, I can't see well ahead. Huh, huh?"
Thud, thud, thud, thud.
Her handstanding body kept bumping into the cabinet where the coffee was stored as she tried to move forward.
"Not ordering you because you're the newbie or anything— you're just sitting close. Sorry if it seems like I'm going back on my word."
Fuck, holy fuck.
"Yes. Of course."
I jumped up and went next to the Leopard deputy.
Thinking about it, maybe the upside-down ghost was better than sitting next to the one with the caved-in skull.
Right?
Right?!
Fully?
Enjoy?
'I'm patting myself on the back just for not squeezing my eyes shut...!'
Enjoying it is way too high a bar for me!
"Alright, let's move them."
"Yes."
I handed her one cup at a time into the hands on her feet, then carried two in my hands to the table.
I'm proud of myself for not shaking or spilling.
The problem was, once the coffee was refilled, we actually settled into a chatting mood.
"Here."
The Dolphin junior beamed, one side of her skull caved in.
"How about we go around bragging about our clear Darknesses? Honestly, without that kind of fun, working here would be tough!"
The Leopard deputy waved her hand.
"Hey, what if a ghost hears and does something? Let's just talk favorite foods or whatever."
"Ah, good idea. Yeah."
"......"
It was sound advice.
But you're all ghosts.
"I like crispy on the outside, gooey inside. Like fried lotus root?"
"Oh, nice. I like things that pop when you chew. Like eyeballs?"
Whoosh.
The Dolphin employee shoved her face right in front of mine.
"Deer, got eyeballs? Looks like you do... You brought them inside your mask, right? Let's share since we're sharing."
Aaahhh!!
"I didn't bring them for eating."
I politely folded my hands under the table to hide the trembling.
"And you two have similar tastes. I think texture matters too."
"Ooh~ Comrade!"
The ghost mimicking the Dolphin junior laughed brightly.
"Deer assistant manager isn't a ghost, huh. Talks about food normally too."
Wow.
'Can't do this anymore.'
If I keep this up, I'll scream for sure.
...Wait.
Yeah.
'Brown's right.'
Yeah. What I was feeling was terror maximized by the uncanny valley effect in this situation.
'The horror of seeing something similar to a human but not human.'
In an ordinary break room, witnessing company people casually showing grotesque, alien behaviors, feeling extreme creepiness.
Plus being the only human, it was peak insane horror.
'In that case...'
Let me glance to the side.
The Lizard was shoving a sandwich, wrapper and all, into his mouth.
"......"
"......"
Not any scarier!
Even if he flicked his tongue, grinned creepily while walking backward, or got up shaking his head dancing madly while chatting casually, it'd be the same.
Scary anyway!
Because it's Lizard anyway!
No uncanny valley or whatever to feel.
'I'm sticking with the manager no matter what.'
Solution found.
I turned to face Lizard manager naturally, swallowing cold sweat, as if I had something important to ask.
"Manager Lee Jaheon."
And I actually did have something to ask.
According to the Darkness Exploration Records, in this ghost story, 'ghosts are identical to companions in appearance, personality, character, etc., in every aspect.'
Meaning, if you ask something casually without being unnatural, you'll get the exact same response as the 'original' with high probability.
As long as they don't suddenly do ghost stuff.
'Might even ask more lightly.'
Since it's not the real one.
I pulled my chair closer, as if seizing the chance for a frank squad talk.
Creating an atmosphere where other ghosts couldn't butt in—it kinda worked.
And I asked.
"We haven't had time for chats like this during work. Mind if I ask a few things now?"
"Sure."
"Thank you. I was curious... how you got so strong."
"I see."
Luckily, Lee Jaheon didn't seem displeased.
"Result of innate factors and acquired training."
"......"
Universal answer that fits any question!
Like asking the top student how they get good grades and hearing 'I study hard with my good brain'...
'Want more details.'
Anyone else might refuse, but since it's Lizard manager, hard to tell.
I gave a slightly embarrassed smile on purpose.
"I see. I asked because I want to get stronger too. Without items or contamination."
"Follow a protein-heavy diet and combine cardio with weight training."
"...Would that make me as strong as you, manager?"
"No."
"......"
Hey, I put out strength fitting my build.
Almost stared at my boss in disbelief.
"...Any advice on that, manager?"
"Yes. You have other strengths, Deer. Develop those more."
Lizard said dryly.
"No one excels in everything. Don't waste resources on inefficient, unnecessary things. Use others."
...Wait.
"When I need strength, you'll handle it, so I should develop my other strengths?"
"Yes."
Lizard nodded.
"Your strengths are ideas and judgment."
"...Thank you."
Well.
'Is this high praise?'
Better than dumping everything on subordinates, sure grateful.
'Bit disappointing.'
Try a little more.
I pondered, then probed.
"But we enter Darknesses separately too. Raw strength is universal and reliable, so I might need it alone sometimes."
"I see."
Lizard stared into space thoughtfully, then confirmed.
"I'll recommend an item."
"...!"
Jackpot.
"Does it boost strength?"
"Similar. Use it as parent item when crafting exclusive gear."
"...! Thank you."
Was just thinking of strengthening or adding exclusive gear anyway.
'Got something out of this mess.'
Even sweating in a ghost-only horror, gained something... Wait.
The Lizard in front of me is a ghost, not the real Lee Jaheon.
'Is this promise valid?'
Panicked briefly, but recalled the manual.
Given Lee Jaheon's personality, extremely high chance he'd honor it.
'Good.'
Phew.
Accomplishing something brings a sense of achievement.
'Use this to endure the fear...'
Pretending to stretch, I avoided looking at the two C Squad ghosts now handstanding and grinning at me.
No longer curious who introduced me to Salmon Market, that Lee Kangheon guy.
'Empty my mind...'
I bombarded Lizard with trivial chit-chat, avoiding ghosts as much as possible.
The Lizard manager ghost, pestered with talk, couldn't do weird stuff and just answered endlessly.
'Learned the meaningful info that manager prefers beef over pork...'
I know, but can't help it, Brown...
Once even that ran out, I pretended to be sleepy, closed my eyes, played word chain with Brown to kill time.
Whatever bullshit echoed in my ears, I stuck to 'I'm tired... sorry, let's continue after we get out.'
'It's 3 a.m., please.'
Thought I was bathing in cold sweat, but no sudden emergencies.
Clinging to Brown in my pocket, those precarious hours dragged like a millennium.
"......"
"......"
Click.
Finally, the break room door opened.
And I was the only one who'd pulled an all-nighter...
"......Done."
Done, you bastards!
I did it!!
Wanted to stand and punch the air in dazed triumph.
'Tears welling up.'
First time enduring raw ghost horror alone without shortcuts...
Like overcoming my limits.
'Wanna praise myself...'
Stumbled to my feet.
Good no one knows I'm someone even D-Grade wears me out...
"Deer."
"...!?"
Wh-what...?
Turning, Lizard stared blankly with open eyes.
Perfectly fine, like he hadn't stayed up...
Wait.
'...?'
Eyes open?
"M-manager."
"No need to wait for C Squad to wake. Go home."
I stared at the perfectly standing Lizard like I was seeing a ghost.
Then turned to C Squad sprawled asleep.
"......"
"......"
No way.
"You weren't... a ghost last night?"
"No."
"...You clapped backs of hands!?"
"?"
Lizard tilted his head, then answered as if realizing.
"Thought it was trendy."
"......"
Ah.
Aaaaaah!