Joys of Life (2)
Everyone has their own grueling life to live, no matter how exalted they seem, how rich and worry-free, or how perfectly put-together. We all have our unique burdens, so we need ways to unwind and get by. That's why humanity developed "entertainment" in the first place.
In that sense, before I got dropped into the Four Seasons Forest, my own joy in life was pretty ordinary. Work all day, then game with friends after clocking out. Or get together on weekends for a drink. I couldn't afford college due to circumstances, but it was a modest pleasure all the same.
"Hoo..."
And now, back to reality. As of today, my joy in life is officially smoking—that is, cigars.
A cool draw filled my lungs with a refreshing aroma. The smoke curled lazily upward, wrapping up a languid day and soothing my mind.
...Tastes good.
I didn't smoke it all the way down. I'd promised my late father I'd never touch cigarettes in my life. But this hellish environment broke even that vow.
Still, it wasn't bad. At least my heart felt at ease.
Dad up in heaven, sorry for breaking my promise. I'm a bad son.
Forgive me this once. I'm really struggling down here.
Maybe sucking on a cigarette I never used to smoke had turned me all sentimental. I let out a chuckle.
Life's a real bitch.
If only I had booze to go with it, it'd be perfect. But I held off on the alcohol. If I started drinking, I'd end up a sloppy drunk like PassingDwarf. Plus, I had other stuff to do, so booze could wait. Getting attacked mid-drunk would be a disaster. Better stick to cigars.
First things first, trade with the dwarf.
I opened the wooden box holding the cigars to use as an ashtray. I tapped off some ash into it a few times, then sliced the end with my dagger.
Cigars aren't one-and-done; you use them multiple times. I knew that much thanks to a friend who was a real smoker.
Who knew his tips would come in handy.
Helpful was helpful. With my mind clearer than ever, I logged into the Gallery... nah, not yet. First, I needed to prep the wriggling crabs from my backpack.
For crabs, jam a dagger in the mouth and twist like a key to kill 'em. That should be fine for trading.
Fish are okay once beheaded, but crabs...?
Gallery rules don't allow live trades. That's why I've been prepping fish halfway. Crabs take a bit to die even with their mouths pried open, though. Better force 'em now and toss in a tub. Dunk 'em in water, and their guts spill out for easier handling.
Crack!
I twisted the thrashing crab's mouth wide with my dagger. Brown gunk poured out, so I chucked it in the tub. Same for the next one.
While they puke up blood and guts, I'll ask the dwarf.
What to ask? Sword maintenance tips, like I said. He's a blacksmith—a dwarf blacksmith. Bound to have pro tips.
I glanced at the iron tub of crabs and logged into the Gallery.
Hey, dwarf. Post a trade in 20 mins.
YasaengGrill (photo of crabs in iron tub)
Takes time for these guys to croak. Sword maintenance tips in the meantime?
└PassingDwarf OK. No big secrets tho. Just good oil, paper, and whetstone = done lol
└YasaengGrill All that stuff... hard to part with?
└PassingDwarf Need the whetstone myself, but I'll toss in a burner instead. That sword's a beast anyway—should store fine on its own?
└Cheonma As it should be. This lady's sword was forged from Man nyeonhan cheol, and it shall never rust.
└YasaengGrill Ooh;;
└PassingDwarf Half-true, so don't buy it fully. Man nyeonhan cheol needs extra care precisely because.
└YasaengGrill It can rust tho?
└PassingDwarf Rust yes, but if it snaps? Near impossible to fix. I'd be slaving days on it.
└YasaengGrill Gotta treat it like a lover then;;
└Cheonma A blow to my pride, but asking you isn't a bad idea. The smith who made it is long dust. I'll maintain it, naturally. Otherwise, I'd be an ingrate.
With Cheonma's sword settled, I moved to the next gear. Not the golden shield, but the Adamant-whatever one from SunForever.
└YasaengGrill How about the shield?
└PassingDwarf Don't bother maintaining it. Waste of time. Shields are built to break.
└YasaengGrill Has Adamant-something in it?
└PassingDwarf Then when THAT shield breaks, YOU die;;
└SunForever Same as I said. Heed it.
└YasaengGrill Gotcha.
Crossbows, axes, arrows, etc.—I grilled him on everything I use. Most boiled down to "oil 'em good, won't break." Crossbow strings need swapping, but he'd handle that.
└YasaengGrill Can't I swap 'em?
└PassingDwarf Leave it to the pro.
└YasaengGrill Yeah;;
20 minutes flew by in chat. I checked the tub—dead silent. Guts and blood all drained. Trade time.
YasaengGrill posted a trade item.
There. Your two crabs. Prep and eat right away.
PassingDwarf posted a trade item.
PassingDwarf Maintenance tools and oil. Top-shelf oil—don't waste it. OK]
PassingDwarf But don't crabs give you fever or some shit?
No, they don't.
The trade with the dwarf wrapped quick. I checked the goods: toolbox this time, not a plain wood box. Whetstones separate, different types.
This one's like a vertical grindstone.
One spins, the other a rectangular block. Better outside than in the cave—Wonmo might wake to the grinding noise, hassle.
This oil... why so much?
Not a simple vial—looks like a booze bottle. Thick oil in a brown liquor flask...
Like Mom storing soy sauce in a cola bottle back in the day.
Dwarves all like this, or just him? Quantity's generous, no complaints.
Oil paper next—more like plain paper. Guess for applying oil directly.
Lemme try.
Might as well polish Cheonma's sword. Nothing else pressing.
I followed the dwarf's steps, slowly maintaining it. A master blade that slices flesh, hide, even bone like butter. But with a noob user, it was filthy in spots. Fought a guardian this morning, pack at lunch.
Didn't clean after Mad Dog either, huh?
Hence the grime. Cheonma'd flip if she saw.
Dab oil on the blade, wipe gently with paper...
"Ack! Hot!!"
My hand grazed the edge with the paper—sliced clean. What kinda paper does that?
I eyed my dripping finger, silently fetched an elixir.
Edge is no joke. Gotta watch it.
Could lose all my fingers. Even with World Tree gloves. Confirmed their regen, but damn, that sword's busted.
Treat it like a real lover.
A picky one. Not even K2 in the army was this finicky.
I poured my soul into polishing Cheonma's sword. Sharp edge made it tough, but success. Sacrificed wads of paper, unavoidable.
Practice makes perfect.
Propped it against the cave wall per dwarf: ventilated, dry spot best.
Oil the rest too.
Shield, dagger, shovel, axe—everything oiled.
Why not buy new? Prevents failure at crunch time.
Done...
I turned to Ppareumbo. Rocking his signature chill expression. He tilted his head slow as I stared.
Torturously slow. But I eyed something else.
"Ppareumbo."
"...".
"Wanna get your claws maintained?"
Ppareumbo's vicious claws needed it. Dead serious—not a joke. Owe my life to 'em multiple times.
"C'mere. Good for you too."
"...".
He eyed me suspiciously, then ambled over slow.
I prepped oil and paper while he approached.
Wait—claws need trimming first, or oil?
Never raised pets. No one trims sloth claws anyway.
Spotted the whetstones. His claws dent iron tubs—whetstone enough?
...Nah.
Size mismatch. Too tight-packed.
After agonizing, I hit the Gallery. All kinds there—someone knows pet claws.
Anyone know how to maintain animal claws?
YasaengGrill (photo of Ppareumbo's vicious overgrown claws)
Wanna maintain Ppareumbo's but what tools?
└Cheonma Vicious claws indeed. Maintenance is wise.
└YasaengGrill He's my top asset now—essential.
└SwordTasteStar Ppareumbo that strong?
└YasaengGrill Speed's insane. Can't track with eyes;;
└Never seen a sloth claw groomer lololol
└Sloth claws naturally that scary?
└Gotta climb trees, duh?
└PassingDwarf Don't ask me. I maintain tools, not animals.
└YasaengGrill Thx
└SunForever Trimming or sharpening?
└YasaengGrill Sharpening. Make 'em deadlier.
└SunForever I can help. I do my pet lion's claws.
└YasaengGrill You raise lions?;;
└SunForever So what. Trendy in Setan. You're the weirdo raising a sloth?
└Fair.
└Lions are cats lol
└Lions like boxes too?
└Tigers do, yeah.
SunForever dropped tips: Methods vary by claw type. Lions/tigers linked to vessels—careful. Sloths? No issue, easy mode.
└SunForever Packed tight? Sandpaper. Easiest.
└YasaengGrill No tools needed?
└SunForever Sandpaper's it.
Sandpaper it was for Ppareumbo's claws. He knew what was up—held out his paw quietly.
Claws but "paw" feels off.
Lifesavers deserved the effort. Final wipe with oiled paper—done.
Ppareumbo eyed his shinier, sharper claws. Same blank face—hard to tell if pleased or not.
"Like it?"
"...".
Nod—
Nod—
Even his nods dragged.