The Immortal Alchemist
A translucent blue window hovered in the air. Its interior was completely empty. A personal subspace granted only to me. Without it, I might not have survived until tomorrow—I could have died today. If the world hadn’t been altered by that erotic game, spatial magic would be an ultra-rare art reserved for archmages alone. The space was tiny, yet possessing even this much was an extravagant privilege.
But none of that mattered right now.
“System. Open the gacha window.”
My heart hammered against my ribs. If Iliana announced our broken engagement immediately, fine. If not, I needed another plan. To keep my head from flying off at the hands of that damn hero’s holy sword during tomorrow’s entrance ceremony, I had to pull a survival skill here and now.
“Spin it.”
“……Huh?”
I stared in disbelief. Wait, fuck. It wasn’t a simple spin—it was a slot machine where you bet coins? What the hell? My life was already hanging by a thread, and now even spending coins was a gamble? Had the original Evan’s gambling addiction somehow carried over into the system itself?
Beginner’s luck has to exist, right? People who make money can do it with just one coin.
Click.
The roulette in the air spun like crazy. A brilliant rainbow effect exploded outward as three tiny fairy holograms popped out, trumpets blaring—ba-ba-bam!
Whoa, jackpot on the first single coin? Had the possession protagonist finally gotten his destined lucky break?
My excitement lasted about half a second.
A red lighter clattered onto the floor. I picked it up with a hollow laugh. Flicking the flint produced a weak blue flame that sputtered pitifully.
It was technically useful, but my neck was on the chopping block tomorrow.
“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.”
I’d earned those coins through blood and sweat, and this was what I got? A glorified fire starter? Frustration boiled over. Without waiting, I burned three more single coins.
The little butterfly-like fairies danced out again, but the results were pathetic.
Who the hell could eat ramen when they were going to die the day after tomorrow? I kicked the packet across the floor.
Coins remaining: 96.
I could see the pattern now. This penny-pinching gacha would never give me anything good. High risk, high return. I had to dump in a serious amount if I wanted a real item.
“Invest five coins.”
“Haa… Dear God of Gacha, I beg you!”
Banana Peel That a Certain Person Will Absolutely Never Slip On (One-Time Use)
Could I even use this? How was I supposed to make it work? Was I supposed to wait for the hero to charge at me with his sword and then toss this on the ground? Just imagining it made tears well up in my eyes.
I dumped another three batches of five coins, but all I got were chocolate, a ballpoint pen, and a D-Grade Item: Transparent Window (One-Time Use). The transparent window was interesting—it seemed to make objects or people directly behind it invisible. Unfortunately it was tiny, so it couldn’t hide a person, and it was single-use.
“Useless. So damn useless.”
Nothing but random junk kept pouring out. Some of it looked vaguely useful, but none of it was the kind of power that would save my neck tomorrow.
My palms were slick with sweat. At this rate I was completely fucked. I’d waste every coin on trash, then get dragged to the academy with an empty inventory. No choice left. This was real gambling. Time to channel my inner high-roller.
“……All in.”
[YES / NO]
YES
I clasped both hands together and prayed with everything I had. Please. Please let me live. I don’t want to die here yet.
The roulette spun so violently it looked ready to explode. Was this the legendary beginner’s luck?
A blinding golden light flooded the room. The fairies rose to their feet, applauding wildly as they began singing an opera. I could feel it—something absolutely broken was about to drop.
Then the text appeared in the air.
“Holy… fuck. No, this is insane. Completely insane.”
An ULTRA RARE that surpassed even SSR? Was the system broken? No—this was exactly what I needed.
Effect: Allows you to glimpse a ‘critical future event’ that will drastically alter a heroine’s life for 10 seconds.
Activation Timing: Triggers when a heroine’s critical future is at stake.
Activation Condition: Consumes coins. (Coin cost varies depending on the importance of the future event.)
“Holy shit, this is it!”
A cheer burst out of me. No matter how many times I’d binged the original erotic anime, I couldn’t possibly know every minor future event or hidden backstory in this doomed world. Sure, there were conditions, but if I had enough coins I could peek at deadly futures in critical moments? This wasn’t just some combat skill—this was a cheat key that could twist the very laws of causality.
“Perfect. Let’s use it right—!”
“……Ah.”
Right. I’d just gone all-in with fifty coins. Zero left. The joy drained away in seconds, replaced by cold, brutal reality crawling down my spine.
If I wanted to survive tomorrow, I needed more coins. I considered sneaking over the wall at night, but my personal maid Ria—stationed right outside my door on the family head’s orders—was watching me like a hawk.
Who was Ria? In the future she would join the hero’s party and become a genius swordswoman who swept across the continent. A monster who reached Sword Expert purely by secretly observing the knight commander of a declining count’s household. With my current pathetic specs, one chop from her hand would knock me out cold.
Escape was impossible. That left only one answer.
“……I have to squeeze coins out of her.”
Coins could be obtained through skinship or raising a heroine’s favorability. The easiest method involved a heroine’s panties. Haa. The future looked pitch black. I covered my face and bit my finger.
There was no proper way. This was the only option. I came up with a completely insane plan I’d never even heard of before.
“Come in, Ria.”
Creak.
Ria entered with an expressionless face, dressed in her neat maid uniform. Beneath her soft ash-gray hair shone inorganic violet eyes that seemed stripped of all emotion.
“You called, Young Master?”
“Ria. Lock the door.”
Her eyebrows twitched faintly. A gambling-mad degenerate asking to lock the door in the middle of the night. I saw her hand reflexively move toward the self-defense dagger hidden in her skirt.
I swallowed hard and spoke with the most solemn, tragic expression I could muster.
“Ria. Do you know why I’ve been living like trash, throwing away the family fortune in gambling dens all this time?”
“……How could one such as I possibly understand the deep intentions of the Young Master?”
That was sarcasm. Ha! Why did I have to possess a damn degenerate and face this kind of trial? Other maids supposedly obeyed their masters without question. Just how much of a trash bag had the original Evan been for her to react with suspicion first…?
I rose from my seat and slowly approached her. Ria’s body stiffened almost imperceptibly. A classic negative favorability reaction. But I had no choice. This was the only way.
“The truth is… I am an alchemist.”
“……Pardon?”
For the first time, the always icy Ria’s expression completely collapsed. She looked utterly dumbfounded, as if she’d been hit where she least expected it. Even I felt ridiculous saying it, so I could only imagine how she felt. Still, I kept the momentum going.
“Young Master Evan, what kind of absurd joke is that? Alchemists vanished from the continent seven hundred years ago… Even though the first Count Balderck was an alchemist, ever since then—”
Perfect. Seven hundred years ago makes it even better. And the first Count Balderck had been an alchemist? I’d known there were no alchemists after watching Chronicles of the Fall of the Empire, but this was new information.
I steadied my mind and continued.
“Since you already know the first Count Balderck was an alchemist, this will be easy. Quite by accident as a child, I discovered the secret vision he left behind. I secretly inherited that vision and have been researching it in secret for ten years. I hid it because I knew Father would oppose it. Who would allow the eldest son—destined to inherit the countship—to study an art that disappeared seven hundred years ago? All the debts I racked up were merely camouflage to obtain alchemical ingredients. To save this crumbling countship. No—to save the entire world from the colossal destruction that is coming.”
I spat out the nonsense without hesitation, staring straight into her eyes without blinking once. With my life on the line tomorrow, there was nothing I couldn’t say. Ria, whose expression had crumbled, quickly regained her composure. She narrowed her eyes sharply, clearly not believing a single word.
“The world is going to be destroyed? Suddenly? Then prove that you are an alchemist. If what you say is true.”
Hook, line, and sinker. Was this what voice phishing felt like?
In a world with magic, knights, spirit users, druids, dragonkin, elves, demons, and monsters, there were no alchemists. The fact that alchemy had vanished seven hundred years ago was crucial. No one actually knew when it disappeared—it was simply “a very long time ago.” No one knew what alchemy even was. That was the key.
I stepped right up to her until my breath brushed her cheek. Her face flushed. The moment I took one more step, Ria tried to retreat, but I reached out and smoothly untied the ribbon holding her ash-gray hair.
Shaaaa—
Her neatly tied hair cascaded down over her shoulders. Damn, she really is gorgeous. I mentally patted myself on the back for not fainting at the sight of such a beauty. If I were still in Korea, could I ever have had a girl this stunning as a personal maid? Possession wasn’t all bad.
At the same time, a soft, sweet floral scent burst forth and tickled my nose. A fatally addictive fragrance that made my heart skip a beat. Heaven. Realizing she’d felt my breath, Ria’s pale cheeks burned bright red in an instant.
“Y-Young Master! What are you—!”
“Watch closely. This is my alchemy.”
I showed her the ribbon in my hand, then gestured into empty air. Inside my head I shouted.
Inventory!
Whoosh—
The ribbon in my hand vanished without a trace. Ria’s pupils shook violently as if an earthquake had struck. Even with a Sword Expert’s senses she couldn’t detect any mana fluctuation, yet the object had disappeared into another dimension.
She circled me suspiciously. It’s not there. It’s gone. Search all you want—nothing.
“H-How exactly did you do that, Master?”
She’d been calling me Young Master or Evan until now, but her tone had completely changed.
“I like the sound of ‘Master,’ Ria!”
“H-How exactly did you do that, Master?”
“I am the Immortal Alchemist. Behold. And feel. The power of alchemy.”
I reached out again, pulled the ribbon back out of the inventory, and dropped it onto her shoulder with a soft plop. Ria’s breathing grew ragged. The contempt in her eyes shattered into pieces, replaced by pure shock and reverence.
“Th-This is the legend passed down in the family… the secret vision of the first Count?”
“Correct. But this is merely the basics.”
“But how could Young Master accomplish what no one has managed in seven hundred years—”
Back to Young Master? She was trying to return to reality. Not on my watch. I pressed the attack.
“Call me Master!”
“Yes! M-Master, how on earth—!”
“Do not doubt! That is an insult to the alchemy I have pursued with blood and sweat for ten years! Behold! And feel!”
This time I pulled out the chocolate I’d gotten from the gacha.
“Hup! Wh-What kind of artifact is this?”
“It is an elixir created by an alchemist condensing and refining the essence of the earth. Eat it!”
I peeled the wrapper and gently placed a piece of chocolate on her tongue. The pinnacle of modern capitalism and chemical engineering—overwhelming sweetness. Even I, who was used to it, could barely resist, so how could an otherworlder who only ate bland medieval bread possibly withstand this devilish flavor?
“……Ehh?!”
The moment the chocolate touched her tongue, Ria’s pupils dilated dramatically. Her expression shifted rapidly—ecstasy, shock, wonder. The strict, expressionless face completely fell apart.
“Th-This is a taste that can never be experienced in reality. What kind of elixir is this?”
“Does it not lift your mood?”
“It… it does.”
“A single tiny piece can blow away even the darkest melancholy!”
“I… I see.”
Thump.
“Young Master Evan—no, Master! You have truly become an alchemist! Congratulations! Congratulations!”
For the first time she knelt before me in worship, pressing her forehead deeply to the floor.
“Evan von Balderck is the future of the countship and its one true master.”
Good. Very good. Perfect. The plan had succeeded flawlessly.
I clutched my trembling heart, looked down at her, and spoke in a solemn, sacred voice.
“Indeed. However, Ria, to prevent the coming destruction, this alchemy is absolutely necessary. Yet… there is still one ‘critical catalyst’ missing.”
Finally, the main point. Everything until now had been setup for this moment.
“A catalyst, you say? I will obtain it even if it costs my life! What do you require, Master!”
I could hardly believe a plan like this had worked. It was exactly like something out of an erotic game. Still, I maintained my holy expression and swallowed hard.
The long-awaited climax.
“It is precisely…”