Chapter 39
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 39
“We missed the circus after all.”
Vanessa let out a soft, regretful sigh and glanced at him. River Ross, who was driving the carriage, merely shrugged at her words—shameless, considering he was at least eighty percent responsible for them missing the show.
He was exasperating, but she couldn’t bring herself to blame him. Without him, this dreamlike escape would never have happened in the first place. And honestly, the night had been satisfying enough even without the circus—though she would rather die than admit that to River Ross.
“If you wanted to see it that badly, you should have said something. We could have gotten in if we’d slipped them a few extra pounds.”
“How could we? They said the tickets were completely sold out.”
“So? Even at the Linden Opera House, money always seems to conjure a box seat out of thin air.”
“…Spending so recklessly is how you go bankrupt.”
He let out a dry laugh, as if he had just heard the most absurd thing in the world.
“Do you really think so?”
“If I’d known a naval salary was that impressive, I would have aspired to join the military myself.”
“You say the strangest things.”
“I wish I had been born a man.”
It was a passing complaint, but she meant it. If she had been born a man, she wouldn’t have been reduced to a commodity on the marriage market. She would have been able to inherit the family estate directly, too.
While Ingram had made rapid progress in some areas over the past few centuries, it clung to the old ways with exhausting stubbornness in others. The archaic, barbaric law dictating that women could not inherit peerage titles or land was the worst of them. And Somerset was an empty husk, left with nothing but its title and land—not a single pin of accumulated wealth remained.
Normally, a case like this is resolved by bringing in a live-in son-in-law.
But her uncle wasn’t the type of man to leave a single pin for anyone else. He would sooner gamble it all away.
Even if, by some miracle, her uncle did intend to pass the estate down, it wouldn’t be a proper inheritance. The title was always reserved for men. Stories of once-wealthy heiresses being abandoned and cast out by the husbands they had brought in were so common it was hardly an exaggeration.
“It’s dripping.”
At River Ross’s words, Vanessa snapped out of her thoughts and licked the ice cream that had begun to melt. She had bought it from a street vendor just before boarding the carriage, its taste incomparably cheap and artificial compared to anything from a proper bakery.
It was exactly the kind of treat her father used to buy her in secret, away from her mother’s watchful eyes. Back then, she had shared it with River Ross, too. Sometimes she shared it with the servants’ children, or with maids her own age.
The only thing that seemed to have changed since those days was River Ross’s palate. As a child, he couldn’t get enough of ice cream, but now he had taken just one bite before setting it aside, clearly not to his taste. He simply watched her, as if observing some strange curiosity.
While she diligently finished her ice cream, the carriage drew steadily closer to Gloucester Castle. Before long, River Ross brought it to a slow halt beside a large tree near the outer wall.
“We’re here.”
She didn’t need him to tell her. The moment she saw Gloucester Castle shrouded in darkness, her mind cleared as if doused with cold water. It was time to leave their brief, sweet escape behind and face bleak reality once more.
Vanessa dawdled, pretending to gather her things, before finally giving up and speaking honestly.
“Can’t we stay out just a little longer?”
She wanted to linger in the afterglow for just a moment more. Theodore pulled a watch from his breast pocket, glanced at it, and tilted his head.
“It’ll be dawn soon.”
“I only need to be back before sunrise. I told them I was sick and not to disturb me.”
“Your maid didn’t suspect anything?”
“Not yet. I’ve been using that excuse a lot lately, but apparently, it’s a common symptom for someone my age.”
“What is? Being sick?”
“Falling ill right before an unwanted marriage.”
Theodore let out a dry chuckle at her remark. She truly, deeply did not want to go back inside.
“So, you’re going to stay out here until sunrise?”
“If possible. Um… will you stay with me?”
“What would we do until then?”
“We don’t have to do anything. It’s just… suffocating in there.”
“…”
“Besides, my uncle won’t be back until tomorrow afternoon anyway.”
For all the difficulty she’d had in asking, it wasn’t a particularly grand request. In any case, nothing that had happened today had gone according to plan. From the very beginning, this entire escapade had been driven by impulse.
Asking Mr. Ross for a way out, suggesting the outing to Vanessa, deliberately distracting her even though he knew the circus was about to start, and everything that followed…
There was no reason he couldn’t be a little more impulsive. The only consequence would be getting to bed a little later. He stopped overthinking it and leaned back against the driver’s seat. As he tilted his head back and looked at her with one eye open, Vanessa, who had been anxiously watching his reaction, beamed and leaned back as well.
The sudden closeness between them, which had narrowed before either of them realized it, felt strangely new.
“This is nice…”
Her long hair fluttered in the gentle breeze. The rustling of the branches was crisp and refreshing.
If he closed his eyes, he could almost believe he was standing in the middle of that old garden. Even now, he often pictured Vanessa there.
Dahlia. Her sweet voice calling the puppy’s name, her warm smile, her slender figure from behind as she stood holding the hem of her ankle-length skirt. Sometimes, even just looking at her, he felt a deep, inexplicable thirst.
“I’m so sick of everything in there,” Vanessa murmured, pulling her knees to her chest and resting her cheek on them. Her gaze was distant, hazy, as if she were lost in a dream.
“I just want to run away somewhere, just like this…”
At that moment, goosebumps erupted across his skin, a chill like ice water pouring down his spine.
“I can’t stand this suffocating place anymore.”
A ghost from the past superimposed itself over Vanessa’s pale face. The nauseatingly thick scent of cosmetics, the traces of lovemaking that makeup couldn’t fully hide, the pale, gloveless hands, the long fingers that had once caressed his cheek, and…
“Once I’m settled, I’ll come back for you, Theodore.”
A voice that was half-laughing, half-crying. A gaze that darted around anxiously, terrified of being caught.
“I can’t take you with me right now. I don’t know what’s going to happen. I’ll probably… get on a ship. Once I settle down and have some breathing room, I’ll write to you immediately. I promise.”
That woman probably hadn’t known she would never return from that journey. A wave of emotion so intense it made him sick surged through him. Theodore clenched his teeth and forced his breathing to slow.
In the end, Vanessa Siren Somerset was no different from that woman. Drunk on a fleeting emotion, she would abandon everyone. Unaware that she was walking a path to ruin, she would beg him to run away with her.
To play the same role as the person I once despised so much.
Theodore let out a hollow laugh. He didn’t know what he had been chasing, or what illusion he had projected onto this woman. He was simply dumbfounded. The horrifying sensation of something he thought he held so firmly slipping through his fingers like sand. Strength drained from his shoulders.
“Let’s go inside now, River.”
Vanessa stretched her long limbs and stood up as gracefully as a cat. For a moment, he couldn’t comprehend what he had just heard.
“…What?”
“We should go back before it gets too late. I’m dead tired.”
There was no pretense on her face as she covered her mouth with her hand and let out a long yawn. To say she had no regrets would be a lie, but she clearly had no intention of deceiving him.
“Go inside?” he asked impulsively, not even sure what he was hoping to hear. The habitual smile on his lips twisted. “And here I thought you were going to ask me to run away with you.”
“Run away?”
Her eyes narrowed as she looked him up and down, as if staring at some hopeless romantic who had lost his mind.
“Isn’t that what people usually do in this situation?”
“I wonder.”
Finding his sudden remark odd, Vanessa tilted her head, then smiled as if in understanding.
“I get it. River Ross, you’re the one who wants to run away, aren’t you?”
“Let’s say I am. What about you?”
“It would be difficult for me. I told you, even if I leave, I have to come back someday.”
“…”
“Of course, it’s not like I haven’t thought about it… But there’s Mary, and I hate the idea of causing trouble for others because of me. Especially maids—if something like this happens, other families will rarely hire them. They won’t even be able to get a letter of recommendation.”
“…”
“My uncle has a lot of connections. If I ran, my friends would be the first to be watched, and the Metropolitan Police would issue a special wanted poster. My photograph would be plastered all over Ingram, and anyone who helped me would be arrested. I wouldn’t even be able to get basic necessities. The sea routes would be blocked. And of course, the land routes would be, too…”
For someone who claimed she wouldn’t run away, the scenario she rattled off was incredibly detailed, as if she had already played it out in her head countless times.