"Saintess. May I come in?"
"Saintess. May I come in?"
"……Yes. Come in."
Porter gave an awkward smile as he entered the room. No one could blame him if entering a woman's room in thin nightclothes in the dead of night stirred some impure thoughts. But he just seemed uncomfortable and burdened by the situation itself.
"Porter. I know about the symptom where the holy power needed for healing slips away without doing its job…… It's what happens to priests whose very vessel of life cracks after casting self-sacrificing spells beyond their limits."
"……."
"Did you…… sacrifice your lifespan?"
"Haha……."
"How on earth did this──."
"I had to do it."
Porter answered firmly, as if he had no intention of explaining in detail.
"Saintess."
"……Yes."
"Please keep it a secret from the others? About how I don't have much time left…… I don't want to burden them with my personal issues."
"What if I refuse?"
"I'd be really sad. I'd feel bad for troubling my comrades too."
His downcast expression was so pitiful that I couldn't tear my eyes away.
"……All right. I'll keep your secret. If you want to hide it…… I have no right to ignore your feelings."
"Haha……. Thank you."
If he insists on hiding it to the end, I have no intention of revealing it on my own. That would be wrong. It would be doing something cruel to him. I want to respect his sense of responsibility. But──.
"But, Porter. You don't have to hide it from me."
"Pardon?"
"I'm the Saintess. A priest. I can't just leave someone suffering alone with their secret. When it's hard, lean on me."
"……Yes. I'll try."
Saintess, so I can't leave someone suffering alone. And just like that, a secret was born between the two of us.
"……You're hurt again."
"Haha……."
"Sigh……. Please take better care of your body."
"I'll try."
"Don't try."
"Pardon?"
"You always 'try,' and that's why this happens. Today, you fell while gathering herbs to calm the Hero's mind, right? Because he's struggling mentally and you wanted to help."
"Well…… it's not a big injury. Just a scrape……."
"Small wounds can lead to big illnesses. Especially for you, Porter. You need to be extra careful."
"Yes, ma'am……."
"……Haa."
He didn't spare his body. If a comrade so much as sneezed, he'd rush over full of worry and care for them, yet he was indifferent to his own wounds. Maybe he thought since he was going to die soon anyway, it didn't matter how he used it up.
"Porter. Why do you go so far?"
Don't you know how frustrating it is to watch? How can someone be so kind?}
"Because I'm the one who carries the Hero's load."
"Not that. Why are you so obsessed with being the Hero's porter? Even if your life is short…… you could spend the time you have left on yourself."
Foolish. So frustratingly foolish. Why not spend time on yourself? Life is precious, so why waste your remaining days on others?}
Porter pondered my sharp question. Then, with a gentle smile, he spoke in a tender voice, like reading a fairy tale to a child.
"Because I want a good farewell."
"Pardon?"
"In fairy tales, the hero's story always ends with 'and they lived happily ever after.' I was jealous of that."
Porter suddenly paused, gazing at the wall. The direction of the Hero's room. After staring silently at the wall for a moment, he turned back to me and continued.
"Don't you think it's romantic, knowing the day my life ends?"
"Romantic……?"
"I know exactly how many pages my life has. Every night before bed, I trace through it alone, thinking. Ah, this is how much is left. I need to fill this page like this so I won't have regrets……."
Porter's fingers, sitting on the bed, tapped the sheets. Tap, tap. Like counting numbers. In steady rhythm. Counting invisible pages. Then his fingers stopped.
"And I write this on the last line ahead of time: And he lived happily until the end."
"……."
"The Hero's story will surely end with 'and they lived happily ever after.' Don't you think his porter deserves that much? I'd be a little disappointed if you didn't."
A good farewell. Porter's wish was humbly simple, yet beautiful enough to dedicate a life to.
"I don't know how blessed it is to prepare for parting in advance."
At his wistful voice, I almost reached out to comfort him without thinking. I barely stopped, knowing how arrogant it would be to presume to console him.
"Everyone will be sad……. Or is that self-indulgent? Haha. I'd be a bit hurt if no one mourned me."
"……You'll be sad."
"Thank you. But I hope you don't grieve too much. Ideally, I'd like you to see me off with smiles."
Porter hummed cheerfully as he talked about the future. His face was so joyful imagining it that he didn't look like someone with little time left.
"After defeating the Demon King, I'll confess to my comrades. Then we'll go on a farewell trip. Visit the Hero's hometown, tour the Magic Tower where the Mage lived, pay respects to the World Tree—my mother's tree—in the Great Forest. Retrace the paths we traveled together, camp peacefully. Not vigilant overnight watches like usual, but lying in a meadow, stargazing, counting stars together until we fall asleep."
"Like friends?"
"Yes. Like friends. By then, not comrades fighting side by side, but true travel companions. Hehe."
Friends. Such a foreign word. Raised in the church as the destined Saintess from birth, I'd never had a friend.
"I have so many stories I want to share. And so many I need to tell."
Ah. I see. I…… have a friend now.
"Help me a lot, Saintess. Farewell isn't my first time, but I'm still clumsy at it. Two clumsy people putting heads together might come up with better ideas, right?"
"……Yes. We'll work on it together. So you can part from your comrades with smiles. So they can send you off with smiles."
"Reliable. Hehe."
"Then…… Porter. Shall we practice preparing for farewell starting now?"
"Pardon?"
"From today, let's be friends."
"Ah……."
Porter let out a small sigh, then nodded with a crescent-moon eye smile.
"Thank you. Saintess."
I couldn't keep the promise.
"I'm sorry…… I'm sorry…… I'm sorry……."
I'm sorry. We promised to send you off with smiles. We promised to prepare for a happy farewell. But.
Porter's final page should have ended in happiness. I couldn't keep the promise. I'm sorry for being a bad child who breaks promises.
"I'm sorry……."
If I'd known it would be like this, I shouldn't have agreed to the plan to cruelly drive him away. Even though I knew. I knew his life was short. I knew how fleeting life is. I knew how precious farewell was to him. But since he'd come back anyway. We'd meet again. Foolishly, stupidly, I closed my eyes and let it happen.
"It's my fault…… I'm sorry……."
If I'd stayed with him until the end. If I'd taken him along even if he got hurt. Then. We could have at least said goodbye. Maybe not with smiles. But we could have comforted each other.
"It's all…… my fault……."
Because I didn't speak up. Because I was complacent. Because I was stupid. Because even knowing everything, I did nothing. It became the worst farewell. We hurt each other and ended it. I need to apologize. Say thank you for all this time. Thank you for carrying our load. I should have said that at the last moment.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry……. It's all…… my fault……. If I'd told everyone sooner, it surely wouldn't have ended like this…….
"I'm sorry……."
"Human Saintess. Are you coming to?"
"This is……."
"A nearby inn. Everyone cried themselves out and collapsed from exhaustion, so sleep more if you're tired."
"Ah……. Thank you, Illina."
Right. I fainted. Illina found Porter's body, the forest was burning, I poured holy power to confirm even his form, and then……. Ah. Aaaah. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
"Calm down. That human wouldn't want you suffering like this."
"……Ugh. Th-that…… Illina, aren't you…… sad?"
"……."
"Ah, no. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to blame you……."
"I'm just used to it."
"Pardon?"
"Losing that guy…… this is the second time."
"……Pardon?"
Second time. Incomprehensible words. A strange melancholy flickered in Illina's eyes as she said it.
"……This is the second time I've joined the Hero Party."
Spectator Mode