The Reality of a Buffer (1)
Watching the human male gradually fade away, led by the angel's hand, I felt a pang of regret. But since I now had a perfect excuse to torment Gabriel, who was still crossing blades with me, I smiled and spoke.
"Hey, Gabriel. Nothing to say?"
"...About what?"
"Playing dumb? That human male... you guys summoned him, didn't you? The mana consumption anomalies detected recently... isn't that it?"
"...Haa."
"Thought so. Then why did you deny it earlier?"
"...."
The cat's already out of the bag, so stop stalling, you bitch! Just use that high-and-mighty mouth of yours to spill the truth already!
Gabriel frowned, let out a heavy sigh, and finally answered.
"Ha—do you remember the human heroes we saw before?"
"...Human... heroes? Ah..."
...? If she meant human heroes... did she mean those monsters who wore human skin and unleashed that kind of power? I remembered them well. They had dared to try and take my head back then... swarming me in droves... until I crushed them with raw power to imprint upon them exactly who was superior. But why bring that up? Wait, don't tell me...
"That's right. We summoned thirteen human heroes... and we thought the thirteenth ritual had ended in failure. That’s why I said no."
"...Are you allowed to tell me that information?"
"Are you kidding? It's obvious you'd keep pestering me if I didn't. Besides, you already figured it all out when you saw that human earlier, didn't you?"
Gabriel glared at me, spilling the beans without holding back. As expected... she knows me too well. The problem is that we know each other *too* well. Of course, I’d already figured it out. But that was beside the point.
I smirked and said to her,
"Heh, so... he’s unclaimed, then?"
"What? Who says he's unclaimed! He’s ours! *We* summoned him!"
"Hm? Didn't you say he didn't count because the ritual failed?"
"Hmph! I knew you’d be interested, so I snatched him up with everything I had. Anyway, we’re pulling back."
"A human male... how truly... interesting. Fine. We’ll withdraw for today, too. I’m looking forward to the future. This boring battlefield... might finally start to heat up."
"You crazy bitch..."
As Gabriel and I sheathed our swords, both sides lowered their weapons and began to wrap up the skirmish, quickly tending to the wounded and the dead. I took one last look around the battlefield, summoned a portal without a word, and stepped through.
Once I was seated in my chair, the image of the human male I’d just met crossed my mind. I licked my lips with my tongue, savoring the thrill of how the battlefield would heat up with his arrival.
Lick...
I’m curious about your path forward. Human male... thanks to you, the battlefield will surely burn bright. I can't wait to see what kind of unique stimulation you’ll give me... I’ll be waiting...♥
Shiver—
Tremble...
"...????????????"
"...?"
A sudden, chilling sensation washed over me, making my body tremble. The angel who had led me to the celestial camp seemed worried by my sudden reaction and asked,
"Human... is something wrong? Why are you..."
"W-well, I'm not sure..."
"Phew... why on earth did you talk to Diablo... once she marks you, she obsesses until the end... it seems Diablo has started to obsess over you."
"Eek... no, why would a being like that obsess over an ordinary human like me?"
"...? Ah? Don't tell me... because the ritual failed, you don't know? Do you not know why you came here?"
"What? Yes... I came straight here through the Akashic Records, so I haven't heard any news... I don't know anything...?"
".... The Akashic Records!?"
"..."
What is this, what is this? They summoned me and now they're flustered? My instincts are top-tier. Spill it already~ I'm dying of curiosity!
I stared at the angel without a word.
"Hmm... actually..."
The words that soon spilled from the angel's lips were like rain after a long drought to someone with zero information.
1. This place is a dimension created by the First God, called 'Eden'.
2. 'Eden' was originally the territory of the Celestials, but the Demon Realm invaded, leading to this war. (The angel said this was the justification for the war, but her voice trembled with anger as she spoke.)
3. Twelve human female heroes were summoned before me. (At this point, the angel hung her head and said in a weak voice that she had thought the summoning had failed.)
4. The twelve human heroes challenged Diablo, were soundly defeated, and have since split into factions and are currently resting.
Eden...? This smells fishy. The beginning of humanity... no, no, that’s crossing the line. I shouldn't make assumptions without evidence. Get a grip, my brain!
Anyway... twelve human female heroes... they’re my allies. The most important piece of information is that they were soundly defeated in battle and then split into factions. This sounds like a situation where I have to play the politics game perfectly just to survive... Ah... is this one of those shitty situations where you have to pick the right senior in the military to make your life easy? Ugh... I have to go through this here too...?
It’s dizzying from the start... really...
I let out a sigh from the very beginning.
"Haa—"
I sighed deeply and buried my face in my hands.
"Human...? Are you okay...?"
The angel's voice, meant to soothe the mind and body, tickled my ears.
"I'm not. I'm just a bit overwhelmed about what to do from here."
"Hmm~ wouldn't it be a good start to gather the human heroes first? Since you're... a male hero... I think they'd listen well... Hehehe!"
Seeing the angel giggling with such a ditsy expression only made things feel more hopeless. I'm dying of stress here, and you're laughing like a fool, you ditsy angel!
I looked at her with a look of utter disbelief, and the ditsy angel tilted her head, asking back as if she truly didn't understand.
"Ehhh? Why? Even if you're weak as a male hero... a hero is still a hero... don't you possess powerful offensive abilities?"
"If one is a hero... is an offensive ability absolutely mandatory?"
"Hmm... a powerful offensive ability isn't strictly mandatory, but... if you have a powerful defensive ability, that's good too. Usually, it's one of the two..."
"Ah... currently, I don't have a powerful offensive ability... nor a powerful defensive one...?"
"...Eh?"
The ditsy angel seemed to glitch, asking back in a strange tone.
"Th-th-th-th-th-then... you're... incompetent...?"
"No, that's not it... I only received a buff ability..."
"Phew... eh? A buff?"
"...Yes."
Incompetent? That’s crossing the line...
How could she! Just because I don't have attack or defense, she treats me as incompetent? The ditsy angel, as if she had heard something she shouldn't have, let out a sound of pure disgust from those elegant lips.
"A buff... a buff!? Eek—!"
Eek!? Did she just say "eek"?
No... where did the human rights of a buffer go...? Even in games, buffers were a respected class... Is it because reality is the real deal...? How did the perception of buffers fall into the abyss like this!
Phew... but... did she really... have to react like that! That reaction... it actually hurts a bit...
Feeling bitter at the ditsy angel's reaction, I cautiously asked why she had reacted that way.
"Th-that... is there a problem with... buffs?"
"What... would you even use that for...?"
"..."
A cold, heartless answer returned from the ditsy angel's lips.
What would you even use that for?
What would you even use that for??
What would you even use that for???
Dammit—
Before I’ve even started with my buffs, I’m getting this kind of reaction...? I’m screwed, hahaha...
How did buffs... end up with such a rock-bottom reputation? Is it because they're angels or human heroes? Are they all so strong that they feel they don't need buffs in the first place...?
Could I even attempt to change the perception of buffs? Even if I could, it would take a hell of a lot of time...
The ditsy angel, whose head was full of flowers, had inadvertently made me realize that reality is cold. I steeled my resolve, determined to show them what a buff really is if the opportunity ever arose, and asked the ditsy angel,
"...Since it's an ability received through the Akashic Records... wouldn't it be at least somewhat useful?"
"...Eh? The Akashic Records... actually gave you an ability...?"
"Yes... they told me to try and survive well with this ability..."
"..."
The ditsy angel looked at me with pitiful eyes. Don't look at me with those eyes! It makes it sound like the conclusion is that I'm definitely going to die! It’s miserable! If this keeps up, I’ll fall into depression before I even start!
To change the subject, I asked the ditsy angel to arrange a meeting with the heroes.
"Then, could I ask you to help me meet the human heroes now?"
"..."
The ditsy angel widened her eyes like a rabbit, surprised. After making eye contact with me for a moment, she nodded as if she understood and held out both hands.
"Alright—please take my hand. I'll take you to the humans' resting place right away."
"Oh... is this teleportation?"
"Hehe... it's similar to that. It's just... the power we use is holy-attribute power! It's different from human mana!"
I took her hand as she spoke. As her wings flapped three times, my feet lifted off the ground.
Float, float—
!?
I was startled for a moment, but I trusted the ditsy angel in front of me.
"Alright~ here we go!"
Zzz-ing—
A round circle emitting a pure white light like a barrier formed around us, and the surrounding space began to distort.
"Oh... oh!"
While I was admiring the sight, the light became so intense I couldn't keep my eyes open. About five seconds after I squeezed my eyes shut, I heard the ditsy angel's voice.
"Alright, we've arrived! Now, could you let go of my hand?"
"Eh? Ah, yes..."
I let go of her hand in a panic. The ditsy angel pointed behind me and said,
"If you go a little further behind there, you'll find the human heroes' resting place. I'll be going now! I have to report to Gabriel."
"Wait, hold on!"
In an instant, the ditsy angel flapped her wings three times, became enveloped in light, and vanished before my eyes. As soon as she disappeared, the surroundings were swallowed by darkness. Looking around, it felt like a place in the middle of a forest where the sun had already set.
"No, you're supposed to come with me and introduce me!"
My voice, filled with irritation, echoed through the forest. What am I supposed to do if the person who arranged the meeting just leaves like that... you ditsy angel!
Resigned, I turned my head in the direction the angel had pointed earlier and saw a faint light. It looked like they were resting around a campfire. I took a step forward, hoping against hope.
Please... let them be normal heroes...