Practical Evaluation (3): The Caliper Strikes Back
The speaker connected to Room 5 thundered so violently it seemed ready to tear itself apart.
“Aaaaaargh—!!”
An arm had fallen.
With a wet, heavy splat.
Blood gushed out in thick spurts.
The students had become statues.
Rustilla included.
Seti too.
Even Zernya, who had to be somewhere in this building.
Even the supervisors whose entire job was to prevent anyone from getting hurt during the exam.
They all simply stood there, frozen as if time itself had locked them in place.
Crack.
The golem jammed the severed arms into its own shoulders. The limp limbs twitched back to life, as though they had never been cut off at all.
The screams spread to the neighboring rooms.
The forearms in Rooms 4 and 6 were sliced away. Then the wrists in Rooms 3 and 7 went flying…
This live snuff film was far too graphic for teenagers who were barely about to turn seventeen.
“You idiots! What the hell are you standing around for? Move!”
The supervisor who recovered from stun first began smacking his colleagues upside their heads.
They drew their plasma swords with practiced speed.
Ten doors burst open at once. Blood dripped from every threshold.
“Ah… aaaaah…”
“What are you waiting for? Run!”
“Stop pushing me—!”
The students stampeded over one another. The supervisors lost all control. They tangled together, shoving the person ahead to run faster, elbowing aside whoever was behind.
Meanwhile the golems—no, the monsters—began leveling their blades at the sword-bearing supervisors.
“Aaaargh!!”
The monster carved a person apart.
“Uuuugh!!”
The person trampled another person.
“Mom, fuck—!!”
The supervisor who looked strong enough to bench-press 800 pounds for three reps was shredded. Once their leader died, the rest made a very simple decision.
“Fuck this, run!”
RUN.
Terrified they might never be able to jerk off again if they were caught, the supervisors fled with their tails between their legs.
“Sigh.”
A long breath left me.
I glanced behind me.
Seti was trembling, completely lost in panic.
Rustilla was slightly better off, yet the ripples in her silver-blue eyes showed no sign of settling.
In other words, I was the only calm person here.
The God of Wisdom and Curiosity is maintaining your judgment through Mental Stabilization (G).
Arms and wrists lay scattered across the floor, yet my mind remained perfectly steady as I analyzed the situation.
This sort of thing is common in this world anyway. I’ll see far worse in the future, so this is nothing.
“Rustilla!”
“Ah, uh… yes?”
I picked up the fallen plasma sword and handed it to her.
“Protect Seti. And do not step outside under any circumstances.”
If we went out now, losing our arms would be the least of our worries. We would be crushed to death in the stampede.
A faint light flickered in Rustilla’s eyes. She was probably using her Constellation’s power to read my intent. There was no need for long conversation. Rustilla collected herself and nodded.
“…Understood.”
“Hey! You idiot! What are you planning to do?!”
Seti shouted at me.
I looked forward.
Roughly thirty severed arms.
The monsters apparently couldn’t attach all of them to their bodies, so they had simply cut and left them. If their earlier goal had been “arm collection,” they were now moving purely for slaughter.
Swords, saw blades, axes, spears, nunchaku, dildos, and more. There was no guarantee they would only aim for arms while swinging such dangerous weapons. They could go for legs, heads… or even asses.
Horrifying.
I had to stop them.
“Little brother, don’t you dare do anything.”
“Are you insane? You want me to just stand here in the middle of this?!”
Seti screamed. She rushed to a moaning student whose arm had been severed. He was on the verge of fainting from blood loss.
“Hemostasis… at least let me stop the bleeding…”
The Lineant family was a medical noble house.
Even though Seti’s dream was to build a galactic megacorporation and become filthy rich, she had still learned basic first aid from her parents.
But what good was that without tools?
All she could do was lay him down and guide his breathing.
That said, Seti was not an idiot.
“Phone! Does anyone have a phone?!”
“R-right pocket of my jacket…”
“Ah, found it… but it’s locked? What’s the password? Supervisor? Password… oh, fuck…!”
Seti’s sudden profanity wasn’t only because a monster had appeared beside her and swung a blade. The man foamed at the mouth and passed out. Rustilla blocked the monster’s strike with difficulty and shouted.
“Run away, now!”
“Wait, the password—!”
“Use someone else’s!”
“This seems to be the only one! And why isn’t the emergency line working?! Damn it… it’s a Montes! Who the hell still uses phones from this company in this day and age?!”
By then I had already gathered the severed arms and moved them to a safe corner.
It wasn’t particularly dangerous. For some reason the monsters quietly avoided me.
“6974.”
“Hey, try 6974!”
“Password…? S-six nine… ah, it unlocked! How did you know?”
“It’s the national rule for men! Never mind that—call the ambulance!”
“H-hello? Is this the hospital? Yes! Monsters are slicing people apart here…! Yes, Stellarium… Stellarium Academia North Wing, Section 54! North Wing! Section 54! North! Wing! Fifty! Four! Yes, it’s Building E! Not Building 2, Building E! E! E! You son of a—!!”
As expected of my little sister. She really has a temper.
Meanwhile, Rustilla was struggling against ten monsters, swinging her sword with everything she had.
She was fast.
But the monsters were fast too.
I needed to help.
But how?
The moment I stepped into their range, my arms would be sliced off without resistance. Besides, I still barely knew how to handle a sword.
Honestly, I had come here planning to dominate the written test and barely scrape by on the practical. I never imagined something like this would happen. This development had never appeared in the novel.
…As I thought that and scanned my surroundings, I felt a heavy weight against my fingertips.
“Huh.”
A sensation cold as steel.
A familiar grip.
The object I used to play with during electron diffraction experiments—an old friend from my memories.
The Caliper of Wisdom, the reward from my first quest.
It was now held firmly in my left hand.
A-rank Artifact
Gifted by Cartesia. Capable of measuring distances to the picometer. Inflicts severe mental damage on conscious entities. Also excellent at smashing monster heads.
Crowbar. Plasma cutter. Vernier caliper.
What do these three tools have in common?
First, they are all engineering instruments.
Second, they are useful in a wide variety of situations.
And third…
They can save the world.
“Come at me, you Samson bastards.”
The instant the caliper was in my hand, I pulled the slider and drove the outer jaw straight into the monster’s visual sensor. The outer shell that even a plasma sword could barely scratch exploded with a single strike.
Defeated a monster with the Caliper of Wisdom.
Acquired 50 Fron.
A clean restructuring.
Of course. Why would anything else work? This works perfectly.
“…Eidel?”
“I’ll help, so just focus on not getting hurt!”
I shook the dark-green blood off the caliper and frowned.
Just as I thought. These things were living creatures. Someone had definitely swapped the test golems with real monsters before the exam.
“You can actually defeat monsters by hitting them with that?”
“Seems that way.”
Rustilla spoke as if she had come to a decision.
“I’ll protect you!”
“I’d be grateful.”
Rustilla swung the sword she was using for the first time. The monster, unable to withstand the impact, was sent flying. Scratches appeared… quite a lot of them. Not a critical hit, but definitely a valid strike.
To achieve that much without even coating the blade in Ether.
As expected of Rustilla.
This girl must not die. Without you, this world is doomed.
So, just as she protected me, I would protect her.
No matter what.
Every time Rustilla stunned a monster, I swung the caliper and smashed its head. Each strike added another 50 Fron to my total.
It felt exactly like earning mileage points from the Outer Deities.
And then I suddenly understood the second function of the Caliper of Wisdom.
“Hah.”
Monster subjugation.
Even if I couldn’t handle Ether, wielding this tool as a weapon allowed me to deal effective damage.
In the end, it seemed I had to walk Gordon Freeman’s path after all.
It felt unfair.
That man was at least an MIT PhD. I had been dragged into this world right before receiving my own doctorate.
Precisely because it was unfair, I would make sure I received that doctorate.
Acquired a total of 500 Fron as monster suppression reward.
With perfect teamwork, we dismantled every last monster. The paramedics arrived just in time. The doctors took one look at the carnage and immediately covered their mouths, dry-heaving.
“What on earth…”
“Please treat the people first!”
The doctors didn’t hesitate.
Even while vomiting, they located the owners of the severed arms and performed emergency sutures on the spot. The necrotized sections, they said, would be carefully preserved for later cell regeneration.
The immediate fire had been put out.
But the situation was far from resolved.
Who was responsible for this disaster?
Who would compensate the victims?
With things as they were, how should the practical evaluation even proceed?
If they held a retest, how would they account for the students who needed months to recover from losing their arms?
It was obvious the administrative team was about to run themselves ragged.
And, exactly as Eidel had predicted, the administrative team was indeed running around like their asses were on fire.
Complaints flooded in. Police, prosecutors, and even the military converged to blockade Stellarium. As if by prior agreement, they all opened fire on the academy leadership at once.
Under the combined barrage of the military, prosecution, and police, the Stellarium board of directors sank.
The stock price of the chairman’s public-interest foundation plummeted.
The chairman’s mental state plummeted. Soon his hairline would follow. Of course…
“…Therefore, it appears we will need approximately this much for the students’ medical expenses.”
The slush fund he had secretly saved for golf outings was about to vanish completely. Plop. The chairman’s wig fell off. (Even in this era, hair loss remained incurable.) “5.6 trillion? Why does suturing surgery cost that much?”
“Well… as you know, the scene was an absolute mess. Some students are also claiming psychological trauma…”
The chairman clutched the back of his neck. The president’s eyes rolled back.
“Still, it is fortunate no one died.”
“…That is true.”
The Federation’s medical technology was advanced enough to revive brain-dead patients. As long as the head remained intact, they could attach machines or inject nanomachines to keep the person alive one way or another.
The real problem was the mastermind.
Upon investigation, someone had swapped the training golems with real monsters. The golems themselves were found safely stored in a warehouse. The chairman groaned while pressing a hand to his forehead.
“…Let us consider this matter later.” Right now there was a more urgent issue.
The entrance examination schedule.
“While the number of injured students is not enormous, resuming the practical evaluation as planned will provoke massive backlash.”
“Indeed. That would be a clear violation of fairness…”
The injured applicants needed recovery time—at least half a year before they could move their bodies properly.
They needed an evaluation method that did not require full limb movement. Yet forcing them to retake the written exam they had already completed would be toying with the applicants. There were few good options.
“…It seems best to cancel this year’s practical exam entirely and increase the weight of the oral interview.”
The chairman nodded.
“That would be wiser. Prepare it quickly.”
“I will notify every department at once. Ah, and one more thing.”
“Speak.”
The president hesitated, then continued.
“There were students who displayed unexpectedly excellent coping abilities during this incident…”