Realization (1)
“Yawn.”
Asella let out a small yawn as she entered my room after finishing her day. Changing into her nightclothes and coming to my room was her way of saying she was ready for bed. It had been over a year of this routine, so it felt quite natural now. Thanks to it, even if I had work left, I couldn't stay up until dawn. That meant I had to handle things faster during the day, but fortunately, the faction healers had taken on a good share lately, giving me some breathing room.
Still, there was a bit left to tidy up now.
“Just a moment. Lie down first.”
As I sat at the desk scribbling in my notebook, Asella nagged at me.
“Young master, I'm sleepy. Let's sleep already.”
“There was so much from the barbarian subjugation campaign. The reports to review filled a whole carriage.”
“The subjugation, huh.”
Asella plopped down on the bed.
“Come to think of it, there was a kid looking for you. Father was making a fuss about how you'd gotten him through a crisis, but you didn't meet?”
It sounded like the boy who'd told us the refugees' location.
“We left in a hurry, so I only caught a glimpse. Did you meet Count Blücher?”
“I had no desire to linger even a second longer in that frozen wasteland. I saw the count briefly. He's become a fervent supporter of Moonlight Palace now.”
Asella smiled in satisfaction.
“With nobles fawning over you like this, won't it just get more annoying?”
“Planning to make them pay it all back later, right?”
“Of course. Once I'm emperor, I'll double the interest and collect every bit of that favor I bestowed.”
Asella giggled and flopped sideways onto the bed. Her hair spilled over the edge.
“Young master, I've waited long enough.”
“Alright.”
I couldn't keep her waiting and steal her sleep, so I decided to wrap it up here. With a puff, I blew out the candle on the desk. As I slipped into bed, my weary muscles cheered at the comfort, demanding rest. The campaign beds and carriages had been rough.
“Good night.”
“Hey, young master. About those favors I've given you...”
Asella was unusually chatty tonight. If she wasn't going to sleep right away, she could've let me get more work done.
“You remember the grace I've shown you, right?”
“To me?”
She'd bestowed more grudges than graces, really. Hmm, but if we're talking this time around...
The biggest was probably saving her life. From the curse of the serpent dragon to falling into the valley this time. But I'd helped her just as much, so hadn't we evened it out? Was she saying that wasn't enough?
I got a little scared wondering what she'd demand as payment.
“I picked you as my personal physician.”
“Ah, so that's where it starts.”
I hadn't seen that coming.
“Exactly. Even now, you get to sleep comfortably in this soft bed because of me.”
“Aigoo, of course. I am eternally grateful for your benevolence.”
She took my sarcasm at face value and looked pleased.
“Still, you did well in this subjugation. I'll praise you for it.”
“Praise? That's surprising.”
“Why? I'm so magnanimous. Do well, and I'll praise and reward you plenty.”
But mess up, and you'll choke you right up to the gates of hell.
“So, here's the thing.”
Asella scooted closer, pressing her head against me.
“That wish you begged me for, even invoking geas. Shall I grant it?”
“Pardon?”
Her unexpected words startled me a bit. We'd definitely made a contract. If I achieved merit, she'd fulfill one of my demands. The letter with it was still protected by her magic.
“For real?”
“Yes. But with one condition.”
Asella added,
“Tell me the wish you made at sunrise.”
“Why that?”
“Once I grant this one, I'll contract that one on the same terms. Tempting, right?”
Asella chuckled like a little devil. When she laughed like that, there was usually some ulterior motive.
Carrot and stick, huh.
It was a tactic Asella used masterfully on nobles. She'd generously give them what they wanted first. Once they tasted the connection to the imperial family, they'd crave more, and she'd ramp up the price accordingly. Before they knew it, they couldn't run their territories without depending on her. Like sinking into quicksand. In the end, she'd have them doing the absurd, and they'd swallow their pride and obey. Resist, and she'd just brazenly say, I'm the emperor—what's your problem?
Setting inescapable traps midway was one of her specialties.
I'm not falling for it.
Even the western duke, who'd gotten good terms on medicine from her, didn't realize yet how it'd cut his knight order costs and make him dependent. Soon enough, he'd pay more gold for better stuff. She was clearly planning the same trap for me.
Besides, I can't leave the imperial family yet.
There were countless bad endings tied to Asella, and my healer faction was just starting to grow. Nowhere was better for spreading medicine than the Imperial Medical Office. I answered without much deliberation.
“No thanks. Let's keep our contract as is.”
“What? Why?”
Asella's mouth fell open; she clearly hadn't expected that.
“Haha, I don't think I've earned that much merit yet.”
“I'm acknowledging it.”
“I'm the humble type.”
Not liking the flow, she thumped my chest.
“What the hell did you write? Was it really nothing special?”
“Yes. Something simple.”
“You didn't ask for the empire or something ridiculous? Holding out till I become emperor?”
“Aigoo, do I look like the type to rule a great nation? It's a simple wish you could grant with a single word right now.”
“What is it, really.”
Asella puffed out her cheeks in a pout. Well, it wasn't bad for her to gain power—not emperor-level, but enough. When I returned to the marquisate, she'd ensure no other political interests touched our family. At least she'd cut off the annoying imperial and noble politics. By then, even if she didn't want to, the geas would force her.
Best after curing her debuff.
I figured that would erase most bad endings from her magic. Curing her lifelong illness was huge merit anyway; no reason not to fulfill the contract.
Come to think of it, if I erase all bad endings, does it even matter if she becomes emperor?
Seeing every bad ending meant no other paths led to world destruction. With all bad possibilities gone, even Empress Asella couldn't end the world, fate or inertia or whatever be damned.
Though some bad endings vanish if she doesn't become emperor.
A few relied on her being emperor. Order mattered here.
“Really, it's fine. I'll tell you after I rack up something much bigger.”
“Ah, I get it now.”
“What?”
“You wrote some useless nonsense from the start, nothing you actually want. You're just teasing me, right?”
Good reasoning, but off the mark.
“No. It's something I really need. And no one but you could grant it.”
“...Really? Only I can?”
Asella's mouth twitched as she fought a smile at my answer.
“Fine, whatever. I'm sleeping.”
“Smart choice. Early sleep is good for your skin.”
“It's already good.”
Asella grumbled and closed her eyes. Then she slyly wriggled her hands around my waist and snuggled in. Studies show sleeping pressed against something weighty provides psychological stability for better rest. Being her attachment doll was a hassle, but if it helped my patient, I'd endure. Though it wasn't great for the spine—a habit I'd love to break her of. Mental and physical health often clashed like this. Exercise was a pain, but necessary for a healthy body.
Guess I need to decide where to strike the balance.
As I pondered my duties as her physician, Asella suddenly pulled her upper body away a bit. She fidgeted her head around, rubbing against the sheets. Her fists clenched, muscles tense—not sleep-talking. One possibility hit me, and I gripped her shoulder.
“Princess? Is your stomach hurting?”
I wondered if it was another seizure like before. She hated showing pain.
“Princess.”
“Eh, y-yeah.”
She lifted her head toward me, biting her lower lip, glaring up with sharp eyes. Not enduring pain.
Then...
“You need the bathroom. I'll get it ready.”
“No!”
Asella yelled and kicked off the covers, jumping up.
“I'm sleeping in my room tonight.”
“Suddenly? Well... suit yourself.”
Asella grabbed her pillow and hopped back to her room like a midnight ghost.
What's with her?
The next day, Asella woke alone in her bed and huffed in pointless frustration. She hadn't slept properly anyway. Too many thoughts swirling.
Why did I do that?
Last night had been truly weird. She never offered kindness first. Sure, it was partly to torment Ras...
That's the problem. It wasn't torment.
Grant his first wish as planned, then geas the second for a new opportunity. All gain for Ras. For her? Only that he'd cling harder.
No, that's weird.
She'd wanted him dependent—his rejection proved it. So why did that bother her? Why do I like Ras clinging to me?
Lately, her thoughts twisted in strange directions. Irrational, illogical, unreasonable. Faulty premises leading to subtle hints.
And that's still a problem.
That joy when he said only she could grant it? Weird too. Because it proved her competence? Or...
“Hah.”
Asella ordered her head maid to prepare cold water for washing. The chill woke her brain, but last night still didn't make sense. Fleeing his room. Not just her head—her body had felt off. They'd shared beds long, but yesterday differed. Hugging him sped her heart, heated her body to sweat. Not pain. The opposite.
Sharing his bed felt too good—unbearably so. That's why she'd bolted.
I don't get why.
Why this changed state? This stuffy feeling? And the inexplicable warmth filling her chest?
Unable to bear the frustration, Asella summoned Tanya during her afternoon break. They enjoyed snacks and tea as usual. Asella detailed last night and her state from start to finish.
Tanya listened gravely, nodding occasionally.
“...That's what happened. Lady Tanya, ever experienced this?”
“Not as intensely as you, but yes. I've seen it in many others.”
“Really? What's the cause?”
Tanya answered with the sly grin she'd flashed at them before.
“You still don't know?”
“Know what?”
“You like Teacher. That's why.”
“What?”
Asella froze at Tanya's calm words.