Looks Just Like Senior's Pussy
Without another second to waste, Arang and I sprinted straight for the lead car.
"So this is the giant one you mentioned earlier, Senior?"
"That's right. They show up every now and then. Unlike the others, these little bastards spread the corruption ridiculously fast. Not sure if this one's the same type… Tch. Never thought a monster this size would be hiding all the way back in the rear cars."
"So what's the plan?"
"Plan? Other than shoving something up its asshole until it spurts blood like a fountain, what else is there?"
"Nothing. Nice and simple. I like it!"
With a heave we nearly ripped the door off its hinges and charged into the next car. Arang dropped her voice, making sure I locked the next part in my head.
"Anyway, we have to take this thing apart as fast as possible. From here to Sindorim, Yeongdeungpo—it's over in a blink. If we don't stop it here, this fucking thing could crawl all the way into Seoul Station and raise absolute hell. You understand me?!"
"Yes!"
We had to kill it while the aboveground tracks still stretched ahead of us.
Whatever else happened, that one point was non-negotiable. Following Arang's repeated warnings, I kept pushing through car after car.
"What number are we on now?!"
"Car eight! Subway trains usually run ten cars, so next is nine… Urgh?"
"Ah, you fucking bitch! It's already eaten car nine!"
I'd thought we could sail straight through to car ten where the thing was waiting. No such luck. The moment it sensed us invading its body, car nine greeted us with a sight far more revolting than the one before.
Nauseating black smoke poured from every surface. Polluted chunks of flesh clung to the floor and walls, twitching and writhing.
From the outside it had looked almost like an ordinary train. Maybe that was because the thing had grown fat enough to swallow an entire car.
Together with Arang I smashed out the windows, trying to clear the thick black haze in front of my face.
"Ugh, looks just like the inside of an asshole."
"Aigoo… Your metaphors are seriously filthy. At least say it looks like a pussy hole!"
"Got it. Looks like Senior's pussy."
"What?!"
"Ugh… every step feels sticky…"
Just putting one foot in front of the other was enough to drive me crazy with disgust.
After violently breaking the windows and venting the black smoke so it couldn't keep spreading into car eight, I turned to Arang, who was wearing the same grimace at the sticky sensation underfoot.
"This reminds me of a comic I read as a kid—people shrinking down and crawling around inside a human body."
"Oh, I read that one too. Or was it? In mine a whole bus shrank and drove around inside someone."
"At least those didn't have scenes of exploring assho—ah, pussy holes like we're doing."
Arang smashed another window, looking thoroughly fed up.
"You think they'd put that in a kids' book? Hah. Still, breaking the windows and airing it out this fast seems to be working. Look."
"Oh?"
The polluted chunks of flesh that had been everywhere were vanishing.
Seats that had been wriggling as if to say Sit here and I'll explore your ass!, handrails that had swung like grasping hands and stuck to my helmet the second I tried to walk past—everything except the windows we'd shattered was returning to normal as the black smoke drained away.
"Hey, hey—that bastard's trying to seal the windows!"
"Wreck it! Wreck it!"
We tore and ripped at every fleshy mass that tried to plug the openings, repeating the process until the last contaminated scrap crumbled into dust. Breathing hard, I asked Arang,
"Venting this stuff outside is okay, right?"
"If you're worried the black smoke might turn everything around us into more of this thing, relax. The smoke dies the second it touches regular air."
"Oh…"
"What, you thought I just mindlessly smashed windows and started ventilating without thinking?"
"Knowing your personality, Senior, I figured you'd go 'Hehehe, more prey!' and—"
"Hey! I may love a good fight, but I'm still a hunter whose job is protecting people. I don't do thoughtless shit like that!"
"Really?! Ow!"
She kicked me square in the shin.
I hopped around clutching my leg like we were in a chicken fight while Arang dragged me toward the final car—car ten, the lead car.
"You little shit, always goofing around. Better than freezing up like earlier, but don't relax too much. From here on it's the real deal."
"Let's hurry. Sindorim's coming up any second!"
Clearing the smoke and flesh in car nine had slowed the train a little, but it still hadn't stopped.
The only ones who could stop this thing were the two of us standing right here.
—Pa… papapapam… This… stop… is… Si, Si-si-si, Sin-do, rim, Sindorim Sta, sta-sta-sta-station. The doors will not, not open…
"What the hell? This bastard's even doing station announcements like it's a real train?"
"It says the doors won't open."
"Were you planning on getting off?"
"No. Of course not. So could you please stop swinging your fist like you're about to give me a knuckle sandwich?"
The mocking announcement left us both staring in disbelief. Arang glared murderously at the lead car broadcasting the message and prepared to force the partition open.
"Ready?"
"Hah. Let's go right now! I need to get back and use that free-all-you-can-play pass on Senior's tits as soon as possible!"
"Didn't you just tell me not to plant flags earlier?! Whatever—fine! We're going!"
KWAANG—!!
We threw the partition wide and charged, fully intending to drop the thing that had clearly written "Thomas the Tank Engine" as its childhood dream job. That lasted only a moment.
"What the… This bastard's sealed its asshole shut perfectly!"
"Looks like it watched us wreck everything inside and concentrated every bit of its defense right here."
"Ah, you fucking piece of shit!"
A thick wall of corrupted flesh blocked our path the instant we burst through.
Unlike the soft, sticky scraps we'd seen earlier, this was a solid bulkhead of layered muscle stacked again and again—an impenetrable wall of meat.
I raised my greatsword and drove it in with everything I had.
"This should be nothing… Ugh, it's insanely hard."
"Yeah, looks that way. What the hell do we do with this bitch?"
The tip sank in, but it felt like jabbing a wooden practice sword into a sandbag stuffed full of grit.
"And this thing's wrapping flesh around my blade. It's trying to steal the sword!"
"Ugh, my axe too… It's not completely unbreakable, but it's not something we can punch through in a hurry either."
We'd stormed out of the partition ready to tear the monster apart, only to meet an airtight defense around its weak point. Both of us clicked our tongues in frustration and fell back.
"What now? Feels like we've already reached Sindorim Station."
"Hold on. Check through the window—see if people have evacuated."
"Yes!"
I scrambled back into car nine and peered out the broken window.
"Huh?"
Why were there people on the platform?
Senior had ordered an evacuation. Instead of clear platforms, clusters of commuters were still gathering to board the arriving train.
I raced back to Arang and shouted,
"Senior! The platform's packed with people! They didn't evacuate anyone!"
"What?!"
Arang leaned out the same window, then exploded in pure rage.
"Ah, fuck these government bastards! What the hell are they even doing?! Is a single evacuation broadcast that hard?!"
"People are still pouring in right now… Wait—"
While Arang cursed the Hunter Bureau's useless bureaucrats, something suddenly clicked in my head. I dashed over to her.
"Senior! Senior!"
"I called ages ago—why isn't there a single hunter, let alone an evacuation?!"
"Senior! Stop bouncing your chest and listen to me! Ah—quit mixing breast milk into it and hear me out!"
"Hey! This is no time for jokes—"
"I think I found a way! A way to kill this thing!"
"What?"
Arang narrowed her eyes at the sudden claim.
"Spit it out. What is it?"
"Okay, but first look at the bastard."
"What about it? It's practically drooling at the thought of eating people."
"Not the excitement—look at its exterior! The outside!"
"The exterior…? It just looks like a normal train… Ah!"
Her eyes went wide as she stared at the monster rolling into the platform.
"Exactly. The only place this thing's defenses are thick is right here—its asshole!"
"You're right. Everywhere else looks no different from a regular subway car!"
"Yes!"
The first time I'd viewed it through Bok-soon's Hawkeye, the creature had glittered as if coated in light. Aside from the meat wall in front of us, its entire body was one giant weak point—and that hadn't changed when I checked through the windows just now.
In other words, we just needed to beat the living hell out of every part that wasn't the asshole… except there was one enormous problem.
"Knowing that is great, but how do we hit its flanks? It's already entering the platform. Wait for it to stop and climb down to wreck it… No. That guarantees civilian casualties."
"What about the roof? Climb on top and—"
"Probably won't work. Subway roofs are reinforced against flying monsters' claws and beaks, and I heard they run live current across the surface."
"Aargh!"
One dead end after another. While I groaned, Arang suddenly went "Ah!" and gave her breasts a big shake as an idea hit her.
Then she hesitated, casting a sidelong glance my way.
"Mmm… Seung-yong."
"Yes, Senior?"
"I just thought of something. It's pretty dangerous, though. Still want to try?"
"How dangerous?"
"Well… if we're unlucky, we might die?"
"Let's do it."
The instant answer made Arang's eyes go round.
"That was way too casual. Even I'm saying this, and it's a seriously stupid plan."
"Still have to do it. What other choice is there? And with you here, Senior, what's there to be scared of?"
"The way you talk… I seriously want to kiss you. All right—we're going!"
"Hah, seriously… The second this job's over I'm cashing in that free-use ticket on Senior's tits!"
"Hey! We haven't even started and you're already planting flags?!"
We stood up, threw open the partition door, and stepped outside.