Chapter 76
Chapter 76
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 76
Chapter Title: The Zealot Confronting the Abyss
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Netkama.
A term for people who are biologically male but pretend to be female in games or online communities.
As soon as the mysterious sinner boldly introduced himself as a 'netkama,' the chat exploded.
💬 Comments — Viewer LOL WTF — Viewer It's the abyss... the abyss... the abyss... the abyss... — Viewer Jia's stream is pure abyss lol — Viewer Going out with a bang lololol ⭐ Top Comment — Viewer Cult leader's face is priceless lololol — Viewer She looks super flustered lolol "Give me a moment to think... please wait just a bit."
[Yes...] Mm.
I had said 'pass' with my own mouth, but it was true that I was flustered.
Because.
My conscience was pricking me.
The virtual scene has a similar concept to netkama.
Commonly called vermiluk.
Vermiluk.
Short for 'uncle or male in the body of a virtual bishoujo,' it refers to cases where a man uses a female virtual avatar.
Vermiluk is in the realm of the abyss, just like netkama.
But at least vermiluks don't deceive their viewers about their gender.
There might be exceptions, but most vermiluks are open about it from the start: 'I'm a vermiluk.'
From the moment I started streaming, I asked myself this question.
So.
Am I a vermiluk?
Well, biologically speaking, no.
Even according to the wiki, I'm not.
Because my real gender is 'female,' not 'male.'
However.
My mental gender... my sense of self is clearly male, so I still haven't accepted my biological gender.
If I just accept it outright.
It feels like my world would crumble.
Therefore, as a being who is both vermiluk and not vermiluk.
Seeing this sinner declare himself a netkama stirred up a lot of thoughts.
As I've said repeatedly, the facial capture function of the Omnia Archive program is as good as or better than motion capture.
[User donated 2,000 won.] Why's the leader's face like that? Looks guilty as hell It seems my complicated, subtle expression.
Was fully visible on stream.
💬 Comments — Viewer Turns out leader's a netkama vermiluk too ㄷㄷㄷㄷㄷ — Viewer Plot twist of the century ㄷㄷㄷㄷㄷ Sweat started beading down my back.
But the follow-up chats deflated the tension ridiculously easily.
💬 Comments — Viewer Vermiluk (owner of massive divine power pouch) — Viewer Vermiluk (tits jonna big) Kicked by manager.
— Viewer Ao newfag! — Viewer Chill lololol — Viewer Anyone who's seen leader's facecam knows she's no vermiluk — Viewer Heh heh heh ...Never thought my dark history facecam stream would come in handy like this.
Anyway, moving on.
If I keep dwelling on whether I'm a vermiluk or not, it'll just look like I'm resenting Reflecting Myriad Stars.
A Fervent Devotee mustn't resent their god, mm.
"..."
No.
Honestly, I do resent it.
Fuck, so when are you gonna fix my gender, you damn god?
Normalize it already.
Thud!
Thud!
Thud!
"Guek..."
💬 Comments — Viewer What the hell now lolololol — Viewer So out of nowhere lololol "O-okay, I got lost in thought for a sec..."
[Anonymous Donor donated 3,000 won.] This freak probably thought, 'Even if Myriad Stars has her eyes on you, you're still a netkama,' right?
💬 Comments — Viewer Ooh — Viewer That's it — Viewer You went to Seoul National Uni? — Viewer Harvard? — Viewer Now viewers have to interpret leader's impromptu RP? lololol Leaving the viewers to their wild interpretations, I let out a sigh.
It seemed.
Reflecting Myriad Stars had no intention of normalizing my gender.
...
...
...
My stray thoughts dragged on.
Sorry for the long wait.
"Sinner, speak."
[I... I am, as I said, a netkama.] 💬 Comments — Viewer Why's his voice so good tho? — Viewer Speech pattern seems kinda girly — Viewer Heuuung... oppa... — Viewer Heh heh heh — Viewer Guy? Even better! Guy? Even better! Guy? Even better! As the viewers said, the sinner's speech had a somehow feminine quality.
This guy probably.
Can do a female voice too.
But if he used a female voice here, it'd blow his cover, so he's speaking in a male voice.
"What sin have you committed?"
[I deceived someone. To be more precise... I deceived my friend. No, not just a friend—someone more than that.] "Uh, um... yeah, I see. Uh. Yes."
My internal abyss detector started buzzing.
Hearing more would plunge it into the abyss.
Not just any abyss.
An abyss too deep for humans to fathom.
Sweat beaded on my forehead.
What to do.
Should I hear more? No.
...Honestly.
I'm curious about the rest.
Insanely curious.
Let's hear it.
He mustered the courage to come confess his sin, after all.
I nodded.
Signal to keep going.
The sinner continued his confession.
The sinner and his friend's first meeting was.
[We met for the first time in Minas Land.] "Ao, you again, Minas Land?"
I'm sick of it.
Time to stop showing up.
The sinner's netkama act wasn't premeditated from the start.
The sinner naturally had a feminine speech pattern, and it carried over to chat.
So his friend assumed he was female.
The sinner's first sin: not correcting the misunderstanding.
The sinner had no friends in real life.
Even if it was someone from a game, that friend had become precious.
To protect their twisted relationship with the friend.
He stayed silent.
One day.
The sinner and his friend decided to voice chat on Voicestack for a raid.
"Giyaaaaak!"
Crisis.
Just hearing about it secondhand has me shaking in fear.
"So... wh-what happened?"
💬 Comments — Viewer This like a radio drama or what lolololol — Viewer Leader's super immersed lolol — Viewer I'm kinda hooked too;;; — Viewer This guy's kinda pitiful... Am I alone? — Viewer No defending netkama. — Viewer Defend what? Pitiful is fact. — Viewer Dunno, but superdonate if fun lol The sinner said.
[For days before the raid, I practiced female voice like my life depended on it.] "Did it... work?"
[Yes...] The sinner paused briefly.
Then.
[Like this.] A woman's voice... even more feminine than mine, perfectly executed.
"Whoa, fuck."
A curse slipped out naturally.
The viewers felt the same.
💬 Comments — Viewer Insane — Viewer Voice is jonna pretty lolololol — Viewer Gonna lose my mind gonna lose it gonna lose it — Viewer Eyes wide opennnn — Viewer 'Possible.' "You can do a female voice this perfectly just from a few days of practice?"
[I don't know either. Maybe I have talent...] No way.
From what I know, female voice isn't something anyone can do, and even talented people need months of grueling practice to barely pull it off.
And even then, it usually still sounds a bit masculine.
This guy's not even doing the typical high-pitched female voice—he's doing low-tone female.
In short.
[User donated 2,000 won.] Pure female essence ㄷㄷㄷㄷㄷ Uh.
Um.
You, let's move on.
Anyway, the sinner miraculously mastered female voice.
And quickly grew close to his friend, he said.
The story was dead serious, laced with raw regret in his voice.
Even the playful chat turned solemn.
[Maybe I'm imagining it, but he opened up completely to me. Good days, bad days...] "So what happened...?"
[Yeah, you probably guessed... he confessed to me.] "...Haa."
I knew it.
From the moment a netkama came for confession, I had a rough idea.
I didn't bother asking why he did the netkama thing.
Lest heretics cause misunderstandings.
This wasn't time to interrogate sins.
It was time to forgive them.
I could guess why this sinner felt such guilt.
He deceived his precious, one-and-only friend right up until the confession.
There were plenty of chances to come clean.
But.
I think it's not too late.
"Don't worry. Under Reflecting Myriad Stars' name, I'll give you proper judgment and a solution. So, what you should do now is..."
[J-Jia... the story's not over yet...] "...Yes?"
[There's more.] "Ah. Wait. Please, stop, no?"
[...I accepted the confession.] "Giyaaaaak! W-Wait, how many days? 3? 4? Less than a week and we can salvage..."
[Days? If it was that, I wouldn't be here confessing.] "Ah, please."
[99 days... tomorrow makes exactly 100.] "Giyaaaaaaaak!"
💬 Comments — Viewer Giyaaaaaaaak! — Viewer Gikkkiyaaaaak — Viewer 100 days is fucking anniversary kiyaaaaak — Viewer Gonna lose my mind gonna lose it — Viewer Why am I so sad ㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠ — Viewer Creepy but pitiful... mixed feelings [What should I do now...? Too late to turn back, right...? Hic.] The sinner started sniffling dramatically.
Don't get the wrong idea.
This guy's a guy, not a girl.
No, but fuck, why even sniffle in female voice on purpose.
"Haa... hold on. Let me think..."
I didn't have any magic solution myself.
As the sinner said—
No, damn it, getting confused. Not female.
Too late to undo.
Conclusion reached.
"I don't think this is something I can advise on."
Mm.
Irresponsible words.
But any judgment from me here would be more irresponsible.
Part of me wanted to persuade him to just be honest.
...But I have secrets I haven't told viewers either.
💬 Comments — Viewer Hmm... — Viewer Um... — Viewer No words — Viewer Hang in there The chat went library-quiet.
— Viewer Idc, superdonate if leader's boobs massive ㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜ — Viewer Superdonate lol — Viewer Bang! lol — Viewer Divine power pouch! lol ...Crazy bastards.
That's how they break the awkward mood?
The sinner sniffled for a good while.
Finally, his voice sounded relieved.
Thanks, Jia. I feel a bit better now. "Have you reached a conclusion?"
[...] After much deliberation.
The sinner spoke with conviction.
[Yes.] "That's good."
[...I'll post a review on the cafe later.] "Uh... no need to go that far..."
[No, I need to write the review to feel fully relieved. Thanks.] And with that.
The call ended.
The confession content wrapped up with a story too poignant to dismiss as mere abyss.
Thus, the confession stream came to a close.